Adrien stares at the back of his retreating classmate, wondering why she's so nervous around him. Am I intimidating? Shaking his head, he decides to visit the blunette as Chat, just to see if this is her normally or if she's just scared of him.

Later, at about 9 pm, he lands on the roof silently, behind where Marinette is conveniently sitting on her balcony talking to Alya on the phone.

"Y'know what? I should just shut up when he comes near. That'll stop my annoying stuttering." His princess rolls her sapphire eyes, taking a sip from her mug. "Yes, Alya, I realise that will decrease my chances of being with him. I've almost given up. I mean, the whole class has probably figured out I have a crush on him EXCEPT HIM! He's so oblivious! Seriously! I act perfectly normal, just good old clumsy Marinette who isn't afraid to tell Chloe to move seats or stand up for Sabrina, but around him I'm a stuttering, even MORE clumsy mess!"

Chat smiles, watching her get worked up, but can't help wondering who she has a crush on. Is it Nathan? Unknowingly, the hero growls possessively when that thought crosses his mind. MY princess... wait what?!

"Alya, stop teasing me about Nino, it's not my fault. Anyway, it turned out good for you!" she whines, dragging the vowels out on her friend's names. "Yeah, I get it, two guys had a crush on me, I'm so likeable and adorable." Her voice drips with sarcasm. "Oh yeah? How would that go? H-he-hey A-A-A-Adrien I, uh, w-w-w- Cue Chloe pushing me away and cue disappointed failure."

Chat's iridescent eyes widen. She likes me?! Well, Adrien, but me?! How, when... actually it's pretty obvious now that I'm thinking about it... She's right, I am oblivious.

"I don't want to risk being akumatised by heartbreak or whatever! Maybe it's better I move on... I don't care if you and Nino want to attend our 'wedding', it's not happening!" Marinette gets up and starts pacing across her balcony before sitting again with an exasperated sigh. "Get real. Why have Marinette when you could have any girl in Paris?" She looks up at the twinkling stars. "Why have the the dullest star when you could have the brightest?" Her voice noticeably softens, as well as her posture. "Thanks Nino, but I shouldn't have let myself fall for him so easily. All because of that stupid umbrella and those stupid green eyes and that stupid laugh..." 

Chat smiles, remembering that day when he offered her the umbrella and she accidentally closed it on herself. WAIT. I COULD GET HER AKUMATISED?!

"What? You haven't heard him laugh, ever?" Bluebell eyes widen in shock. "He only laughed wh-when I..." A faint scream can be heard from the phone, and Marinette pulls back wincing. "Alya, that could mean nothing. He was probably just laughing at my clumsiness." She mumbles. Chat frowns suddenly, realising he hasn't laughed since that day, and before that... he could only remember laughing with his mother...

"That poem was about Ladybug, Als. I figured that out now." She sighs and looks up at the stars again. "I know, but that's a different side of me... with that mask on I can do anything, without it I'm just clumsy, shy Marinette."

Huh? Is she...?

"If you say that every time you bring it up, I'll regret having shown you two." She smiles softly. "I know, I know, I had to because you saw me de-transform and you saw Tikki. By the way, thanks again for not posting that on your Ladyblog."

SHE'S LADYBUG?! 

Heh. Took you long enough, hot shot. 

Plagg? YOU KNEW?!

"Yeah, but then he'd love me for Ladybug... that brave, graceful, smart girl that isn't me." Chat's ears flick in annoyance at watching his lady put herself down, but decided to keep listening a little longer. "Most of it is Tikki. She shows me what I need to do, and helps me land all those crazy flips." 

"I would not be able to help if you couldn't already do it, Marinette!" A small, tinkling voice speaks up. Chat glances to see a red kwami floating beside his princess. "And besides, that kindness and intelligence is all you!"

She giggles, hugging the kwami. "Thanks, Tikki." She pauses, listening to Alya shriek. "Yes, that was Tikki, she says 'Hi' to both of you... Yes, I am aware she's adorable." Tikki snuggles into the girl's hair. Marinette smiles affectionately, stroking her head. 

Why aren't WE like that, Adrien? 

Because all you care about is cheese. 

"What?" The girl sits up, careful not to disturb Tikki. "That's impossible... isn't it? Well, I suppose it makes sense, seeing as they both love Ladybug... ugh, why me?" She whines, covering her face with her arm. "It seems so impossible, yet I can see it, but... Adrien? Chat? That's just great."

Chat pales, not that you can tell in the dark. Did Alya just figure out that I'm Chat?!

"WAIT. THAT MEANS..." Her eyes widen before shutting again. "I kissed the love of my life and I didn't even know..." She mumbles, before shrieking is heard from the phone again. "Geez, Als. Remember? Kim? I told you all about that day because you'd gotten hit by one of those arrows."

WAIT ONE SECOND. SHE KISSED ME?!

"Yeah, well, you weren't ACTUALLY trying to kill me." Her sarcastic tone breaks the leather clad boy from his momentary panic. "Ugh, that means all the flirting was him too... I just can NOT catch a break, can I?"

Chat decides he should leave before he hears something he doesn't need to know. Like the fact that Marinette, his princess, was Ladybug, his lady?! HOW WAS HE NOT SUPPOSED TO FREAK ABOUT THIS?!

"I know you're there, kitty." Marinette looks over at the masked hero now trying to get away. "You don't happen to be Adrien, do you?" Chat sighs, and nods dejectedly. "I hate it when you're right, Alya! ... Mmhm. Don't kill the boy, Nino, he didn't tell you for the same reasons I didn't tell you, and we've been friends longer... Oh, you didn't know? Nino and I were friends long before you two. What did you think we were loners before we met you?" Marinette teases her friend, standing up and motioning for Chat to come down on her balcony. He climbs down, and stands there like a guilty child waiting for his mother to finish work and punish him. 

"Ninya! Silence, before I tell him you're- Okay, okay! I won't! But you need to tell him tomorrow!" Marinette giggles. "How am I so calm right now? I'm not, I'm distracting myself before talking to Mr. Stalker who is so patiently waiting for me to finish talking to you." She looks at him. "Thank you, kitty, for being polite." She pauses in her pace. "Lila? Oh yeah..." The blunette laughs nervously. "Forgot about that tiny detail... I know, I know! But if she finds out, she'll kill me! Literally!" Staring at the ground, she bites a finger. "Uhh, don't know if I want to tell you... Um, I let jealousy control me, let's leave it at that."

"Oh, jealous m'lady?" Chat smirks. Marinette whips around to face him, throwing daggers with her eyes. He had to admit, it was really scary.

"Chat, need I remind you I am extremely angry with you right now and am struggling to resist the urge to throw you off this balcony. Shut. Your. Mouth." She snarls, before turning her attention back to her phone. "Alya, I realise I'm a terrifying cinnamon roll, stop saying that." The terrifying cinnamon roll rolls her eyes, and studies her nails for a moment. "Yeah, yeah, but he was listening since I said how I should shut up around him... Of course I knew, what kind of hero would I be if I didn't?... Okay. Fiiine, I'll go easy on him. Alright. See you two tomorrow." She ends the call and turns to the now slightly terrified Adrien. Because, of course, Plagg would abandon me when she's about to kill me.

"U-Uh..." He manages little more than that as Marinette moves closer menacingly, until there is barely more that 6 centimetres away. She stares at him with cold, empty eyes that drastically contrasted with her usual bright shine, and were uncannily similar to his father's eyes. 

"Adrien." She glares at him and gently, ever so lightly, place one fist on his chest. "Do you know..." Her voice comes out as a growl and he gulps. "How utterly rude..." she continues, moving forward and pushing him against the wall. "It is to eavesdrop..." She holds a finger in front of his face. "Especially after you hear personal information." 

"Um... I'm sorry?"

Marinette stares blankly at him before shoving him to the ground. 

Crack.

"Oh my god, are you okay?!"

~* Le Next Day *~

"Oh my god, Adrikins, your nose!" Chloe gushes and throws herself at the blonde model. "Who did this?! I'll get my daddy to arrest them!"

He nervously chuckles. "Don't worry, Chlo, I just ran into a pole."

Behind him, Nino and Alya stare at the girl who is staring down the green-eyed idiot, face carefully blank.

"You didn't..." Nino starts but trails off.

"Break his nose?" Alya finishes for him.

"I shoved him into the ground." Marinette shrugs. "I didn't mean to, but he deserved it. Guess I don't know my own strength."

Alya and Nino blink at her and sigh. "You're terrifying."

"I know." Marinette rolls her shoulders. "Hold on for a minute."

Marinette walks over to a concrete pillar and cracks her knuckles. Then she punches it. Hard.

Her classmates turn to look at the sound of the audible crack. Alya, eyes wide, shrieks, "Did you just seriously just crack cement?!"

"Needed something to take out my frustration on that wasn't a human being. Don't worry, carry on with your daily business!" She says cheerfully.

Adrien misses the point of all this and sighs dreamily. "She's awesome."

THE END

So I wanted that to be really intense but funny at the same time because I wanted Adrien to act stupid so.... VOILA 

Judge me later.

[caitlyn of 2018] i cannot express how much i hate these but i'm doing it anyway bc i like to suffer