Joe sat on Esri's bed. With his right hand he gently tried to rouse her. His left arm was wrapped around Jilly, who was sitting on his lap. They watched anxiously as Esri sobbed and thrashed around, gasping, "Dagan, Dagan, oh my god. No, no. Dagan, Dagan."

"C'mon, honey. It's ok. It's ok. I'm here. It's only a dream."

"He's dead. He's dead. I know he's dead." Esri was over-wrought.

"Es, wake up. No one is dead," Joe spoke louder. She seemed not to hear him.

Jilly said, "Daddy, I'm scared. Why won't Esri wake up. Who is dead?"

"She's having a really bad dream. She'll be all right in a few minutes." Though Joe wasn't so sure. Esri had been having some intense dreams in the last while, but she'd never been like this. He spoke more firmly and loudly, leaning close to her, "You're only dreaming. Open your eyes. C'mon now. Open your eyes, Esri."

Esri opened her eyes and stared at Joe and Jilly. Her shuddering sobbing continued. "Where's Nat?"

"Esri, it's me, honey, Dad. And Jilly's right here too."

Esri looked at them and began to grasp that she was back in her apartment in Toronto. Oh god, she couldn't bear it, thinking about Dagan. She had to talk to Clea.

Joe smiled at her, "Are you awake now, sweetie? It sounds like you had a terrible, terrible nightmare. Everything's ok. Do you want to talk about it?"

No, everything was not ok but there was no way she could tell him. "Dad, I'm not feeling too good. I want to stay home today."

"You are all sweaty." He felt her forehead and cheeks. She did seem warm. "Sure, but I don't like leaving you alone all day. Do you want me to find someone to look in on you?"

"No, no, please don't, Dad. I'll be fine, really. And if I feel a lot worse, I'll call Luka's mom. I promise. She's home. She's working evenings this week."

"Ok, I'll try to get home early. Jilly, you get dressed. I'll call Farhana and take you to their place and they can walk you to school. Want some juice, Es?"

"Sure, Dad, that would great."

Esri waited until ten, then dressed quickly and ran over to Clea's.

"Esri, what are you doing here. Isn't it a school day?"

"Oh Clea," the anguish washed over Esri, "Dagan is dead, and it's all my fault."

"Oh dear, no, no, come here. I'm sure it's not your fault. Please, come in, come in. We'll make a nice pot of tea and talk this through. I'll get Thomas." Clea put her arm around Esri's waist and they walked back to the kitchen. "Thomas," she called out. "It's Esri. She's come through a terrible time. Dagan has died. Come join us in the kitchen."

The three of them sat around the kitchen table for the rest of the morning. Willa perched on Esri's lap as she went over everything that had transpired over the last few days at Flat Rocks. Reliving the whole sequence of events was difficult. As Esri described the choices she made to Clea and Thomas, she kept trying to think of what she could have done differently, but every choice seemed to bring tragedy.

"Oh Esri," Clea's voice quavered, "I'm so sad about Dagan. You did a brave thing to go after Wilki and her baby. One or both might have been killed if you hadn't. And if Dagan hadn't come, what might have happened to you? His destiny was to ensure that no harm came to you. It is very difficult to deal with people who are violent without then becoming like them. Look at the world around us. Poor Dagan. In order to save you, he was left with no choice."

Esri sighed, "If only everyone was like the people at Flat Rocks, it would be a pretty peaceful world."

"How is it that Flat Rocks stays peaceful?" asked Thomas.

Esri thought, "Well, for one. The people who are respected the most like Zura, Nagar, Tars, Dagan, Barsa. . ." she smiled, "Ok, pretty much everyone. They believe that killing or hurting others is just plain wrong. It's something deep inside them, like a moral code. It's what's so hard about the way Dagan died, being backed into a corner where he felt his only option was to hurt others in order to save us." Tears sprang back into Esri's eyes. She dipped her head down, lightly stroking Willa's back.

Thomas probed, "But some don't share that deep, moral code?"

Esri looked up, "No, certainly Piram didn't when Zura, Dagan, and I first came to Flat Rocks. But somehow now he's not such a jerk. He still annoys me, but he's not done anything bad for a long time, and he really backed off hassling Wilki."

"Why do you think that is?" asked Thomas.

"I'm not sure, but I think putting him on the Elders Council was a big deal for him. I get the impression from Kai that before the Ash Rain, Piram was treated like an outsider by many in the bode even though he'd lived there for a long time."

"So what changed?"

"I think he feels more respected. But respected for being good, not respected for being bad. That's the difference between Flat Rocks and the Violent Ones, isn't it?"

Clea nodded. "And I believe this is key to your Mending."

"What? To change the ways of the Violent Ones? Keep steering them to live by The Agreements and eventually, poof, the Violent Ones will disappear? That's a good fantasy." Esri looked grim.

"Or maybe it's not a fantasy. Maybe that's your Mending."

Esri said, "Seriously? That's all pretty huge. I'm just one measly person, you know."

Clea said, "Yes, but you're a capable, caring young woman who people listen to who has been chosen to go back to the moment in time after the Toba volcano eruption when there were very few people left on earth. And you're surrounded by many good people at Flat Rocks."

"Yes, but what about the Violent Ones?"

"A few bad apples," said Thomas. "I know, some very, very bad apples. But it appears that the numbers are on your side at this point in history. So it's thinking about how to stop their violence and how to change them. Not easy, granted." He shrugged.

Clea added, "The Mending picks turning points in human history where a small group of people or even one person has the potential to readjust human behavior. Thomas and I were a part of turning points in our Mendings that resulted in change, but Disruptors managed to stifle the momentum of the changes. There needs to be a Mending that will do more. I'm hoping it will be yours."

"It still seems crazy that sending back one puny person like me would make a difference."

"Think of it more like a drop in the ocean that starts creating bigger and bigger waves until there's a tsunami of change. You're starting a peace tsunami," laughed Thomas.

"Except the changes won't start manifesting themselves until the time we're living in right now. But we will see them," said Clea.

"It's kind of fragile," said Esri.

"It is," said Clea. "Even the Disruptors can only do so much. Right now, you're at your peak of power and they're swirling around you. You can keep the Disruptors at bay, though it takes some work as we have seen."

"But what about you and Thomas, staying cooped up in this house?"

"Really, it's about saving our energy for you. We're much weaker now than when we were Mending, so it's better to be in a protected place like I've built up around this house."

"You mean the sweet grass?"

"Well, yes that, but there is much more. I'll explain it to you when your Mending is complete. You'll need to know for when your time comes to be a Guide."

"What if I don't want to be a Guide?"

Clea and Thomas said in unison, "You will."

"Well, if you say so. Anyway, I don't know about being able to change the course of all humankind to be more sharing and stop being violent, but I do know that I want to deal with the Violent Ones in a way that honors Dagan. He's one of the best people I've ever known. What do you think I can do?"

The three talked through lunch. Clea and Thomas were a fountain of information about non-violent cultures, societies, and practices.

Thomas said, "Esri, there is no perfect utopian society. People need latitude to express themselves and, at the same time, accept responsibility for taking care of each other. And above all, treating each other fairly." His voice softened, "And when we do make mistakes, or get a little wobbly with our moral compass, we need to help each other get back on track."

Clea said, "Mending is about harmony between ourselves and the rhythms of our world."

"Ho boy, now you're freaking me out again. It's kind of overwhelming," said Esri.

Clea placed her hand on Esri's arm, "Your Mending is planting a small seed and staying around to nurture it for a little while. Then it grows on its own."

"You've given me a lot to think about. I have to get going. My Dad will phone soon. But one more thing. What's the deal with Grilu's cat?"

Clea and Thomas smiled at each other. Thomas said, "Ah yes, the Welcome Disruptor. That's what Clea called hers. We all need them at times, don't we? As you've seen, the big cat is there not only for Grilu. Let the big cat come and go as she pleases. She won't harm you or those who you care about, but don't think that you can befriend her or control her in any way."

"Did you have a Welcome Disruptor too, Thomas?"

"Oh, yes indeed I did. I'll tell you all about him some day."

"I wish I had a Welcome Disruptor in today's world," Esri said. "I could use one."

After Esri left. Clea said to Thomas, "This Mending is different than yours or mine, Thomas, bigger, harder."

"I've thought that since my dreams started again." He chuckled. "I assumed that I had been long ago put out to pasture. So much we still don't know about the Mending after all these years, isn't there, Clea? It strikes me that things are pretty desperate if they had to bring back such an old has-been like me. Scraping the bottom of the barrel, as it were."

"I don't think you're the bottom of the barrel. But I agree, it's curious that your dreams started again. I'm so grateful you're here, Thomas. I hope it still holds true about the Disruptors, that they can't harm Esri directly. I worry."