Chapter Twenty-Eight

"Mary?" Evelyn called as she found herself once again walking through the clouds.

"Are you here to question me again?" Mary asked with a smile as she stepped out of the clouds, her dirty clothes and matted hair contrasting with the snow white beauty surrounding her.

"I don't mean to question you," Mary replied as she wrung her hands. "I know that you said to trust that you know what you are doing but these are my sons are talking about! I cannot just sit back idly and watch what happens."

"You have no choice," Mary replied gruffly. She pointed toward a bench and Evelyn sat down, "What is on your mind?"

"I am happy that Jamison is finally with his love," Evelyn admitted with a half smile. "But he's still in danger as he chases those bad men. I'm happy with what I've seen of Andrew and this Bethany girl. Hopefully she can keep him on the straight and narrow and away from the whiskey and bad influences. I hold little hope that Ian will truly change though I am happy that he has not robbed anyone in the last week. That must be a good record for him," Evelyn smiled in the way of an understanding mother and then she looked sadly down at her hands folded in her lap.

"And Cavanaugh?" Mary urged.

Evelyn sighed, "I'm most worried about him." she stated, her eyes filling with sadness.

"Has he not come far?" Mary asked.

Evelyn shook her head, "He believes his heart is dead! He actually believes he cannot love."

"It just takes time, Evelyn. If you would rather I did not help I will undo all I've done and send them all back to living the way they were." Evelyn shook her head quickly, "No, please don't do that!"

"Then you agree with me that they have come far and you need to have a little more faith?" Mary asked with a raise of her bushy brow.

Evelyn sighed with defeat, "Yes. But I do have one request?"

"You are a controlling one, aren't you?" Mary asked with a mixture of irritation and amusement.

Evelyn tipped her head in acknowledgement because she knew it was the truth, "I want the rest of my sons to remain together until they are all ready to go back. I understand that you had to send Jamison back sooner for him to follow his path but my other boys need each other."

"As you wish," Mary relented. "Though all three of your sons left in the future and the women they need have lessons to learn and paths to travel before any of them will be ready."

"But what if the women don't want to go back?" Evelyn asked skeptically.

Mary glared at her, "I've had enough doubts and questions for one day," she snapped. "Trust in me, Evelyn, old friend. I will take care of your sons."

***

Cavanaugh stretched his arms out, reaching for the warm body he'd kept pressed to his all night, only to find that there was nothing but hay beside him. He quickly opened his eyes and listened hard for signs of her but he didn't hear her anywhere. He felt panic well up inside of him as he realized that she and her clothes were both gone.

Where was she? Had she been upset at his inability to repeat the words she'd said last night and that's why she was gone? He had to find her. He had to make sure she understood what last night had meant to him. He had to make sure she knew it had been more than just sex. He jumped to his feet much too quickly, became tangled up in the blanket and his leg tightened up, sending him crashing back down into the hay.

"Cavanaugh!" Nicole's voice exclaimed and he looked up and saw her standing in front of him. She had obviously taken a shower and her hair was still wet as it fell down her back. She had two steaming cups of coffee in her hands and concern on her face.

"Are you okay?" she demanded as she set the coffee cups on the floor and hurried to him.

Cavanaugh nodded, though he was sure he was grimacing in pain. Clearly trying to get up that fast had been a bad mistake. In his mind he cursed the man who had shot him and wished he could repay the favor, "I'm fine," he managed to reply with a grunt. He saw her eyes fall to his lap and he realized he was still naked. He quickly grabbed the blanket and pulled it over himself. "I woke up and you were gone, it scared me," he added accusingly.

"Sorry," Nicole replied as she picked the coffee cups back up. "I needed a shower and I figured you'd like some coffee."

"Thank you," he replied, taking the offered cup from her as she sat down beside him. He reached out and tucked some wet strands of hair from her face before tracing her cheek bone with his thumb. He saw the red rims around her eyes and frowned, "You've been crying."

Nicole shook her head and took a sip of her coffee, "No I haven't." Cavanaugh raised his brow and she sighed. "Okay I have, but it has nothing to do with you or with us."

When Cavanaugh looked doubtful, Nicole leaned forward and kissed him tenderly. His hand moved to the back of her head, pulling her closer, while his lips deepened the kiss. Nicole felt herself falling over that edge again. Just like last night when she had opened her bedroom door and seen him standing there she had known she was going to make love to him, she knew she wanted to do the same this morning.

This man had touched something more than just her body last night. Never had Nicole known that sex could satisfy not only your body but your heart and soul as well. She had known from the first day he'd been here that Cavanaugh McEllis was her one and only.

Their coffee cups were set aside and Cavanaugh leaned back against the hay, pulling her with him. Nicole's hands danced across his chest and then lower and lower. Cavanaugh moaned out her name and then they heard footsteps approaching the barn.

Nicole pulled away quickly and jumped to her feet. She left the stall and shut the door behind her just in time to see Madeline and Leslie enter the barn with Ian trailing not far behind them. Nicole wondered why in the world Ian was already awake this morning. It wasn't like him to be up before noon not to mention seven.

"Nicole! I thought you were still in the bed," Leslie said when they caught sight of her.

Nicole blushed and quickly cleared her throat as she went to Gemini's stall. The gelding was clearly angry with her over the lack of a ride the night before and kept his back to her and his head in the corner, "I got up early and decided to come check on the horses. What are you all doing out here?"

"Madeline want's to go for a ride on Saraphine and I could use the fresh air myself. You don't mind do you?" Leslie asked.

Nicole shook her head, "No, of course I don't mind. Saraphine has always loved Madeline." As if in response to that statement, Saraphine tossed her head over the stall door and blew out a breath at Madeline. The girl giggled and kissed the horses tan nose.

Leslie walked closer to Nicole and bit her bottom lip, "I was also wondering if you had a gun I could borrow to take on the trail with us." Nicole nodded knowingly, "Yeah, if you want a revolver I have the .357, the .44 and the .22. Or I have a couple of automatics you can pick from. Which one do you want?"

"The .357 I guess." Leslie replied.

Ian leaned against the stall on the other side of the barn and frowned, "Why do you need a gun?" he questioned and Leslie shrugged.

"Bears, coyotes..." Abusive husbands she added silently.

Ian nodded and pulled off his gun belt, "Here." he said. "It's a .45 and guaranteed to kill any bear that tries to mess with you."

"Thank you." Leslie replied cautiously as she reached out and took it from his hand.

Ian just shrugged and raised his pant leg to reveal the handle of a derringer sticking out of his boot, "I have more."

Nicole heard a movement in the stall where she'd left Cavanaugh and she saw that Ian had heard it as well. Nicole's blush deepened and she quickly went to the tack room and grabbed a saddle and blankets.

"Well let's get her ready for you all." she said with a smile as she came back out.

Ian took the saddle from her and Nicole stared at him in shock. He winked at her, "It wouldn't do for a gentleman to let a lady do the heavy lifting. I am a McEllis after all and we know how to treat a lady." Ian's voice lowered to barely above a whisper and he put his lips close to her ear. "But then again I'm sure you already know that."

Nicole's blush deepened and she swung her fist and punched him hard in the arm, which simply caused him to start laughing loudly as he carried the saddle to Saraphine's stall.

Leslie opened the stall door for him and in no time Ian had the horse saddled and ready to go and Leslie and Madeline were climbing on and riding off down the path that wound through the mountains.

Ian rubbed the back of his neck as he watched them ride off. Damn oh damn. Leslie could play poker and ride a horse. He might just have to take a chance on bedding that woman after all because he had a feeling it would definitely be a wild ride. Speaking of wild rides...

"You can come out of that stall now, big brother." Ian said as he crossed his arms over his chest and leaned against Sarahpine's stall. Nicole let out a chocked gasp and blushed deep crimson and the stall door opened and Cavanaugh limped out, fully clothed and looking quite sheepish.

"Well it's about damn time." Ian said with a grin. "I honestly didn't think you had it in you, Cav."

"Just walk away, Ian," Cavanaugh growled.

Ian nodded, "Okay. Okay," he relented and then he leaned toward Nicole and gave her a wink, "Just so you know, the hay in your hair was a dead giveaway."

Nicole instantly reached for her hair and realized that she had indeed gotten hay in it while in the stall with Cavanaugh this morning, "What part of walk away was hard to understand?" Cavanaugh grumbled as he laid his hand on his gun. Ian laughed loudly and waved his hand.

"I'm gone. Leaving." he walked to the big barn doors and then stopped and turned around. "You know it is bullshit though. Jamison is probably getting bedded as we speak. Andrew has had some and now you've had some, Cav. I'm supposed to be the irresistible one that gets all kinds of a woman and I ain't had a woman in weeks....."

"Get. Out." Cavanaugh repeated and Ian laughed again and left the barn. Nicole turned to face Cavanaugh and he limped heavily toward her, "Are you okay?" she asked, glancing at his leg.

Cavanaugh nodded as he rubbed it subconsciously, "Yeah." he replied.

Nicole closed the distance between them and motioned for him to sit on a barrel beside him. He did and she crouched down and began to massage the tight, knotted muscles in his left thigh.

"What are you doing?" Cavanaugh managed to ground out between his clenched teeth as he tried to fight the tightening in his denims.

"Trying to help the pain." she replied and Cavanaugh sat back and let her because in truth her tiny hands were indeed helping.

Nicole marveled at the thickness of his thigh. Cavanaugh was all man. Sheer ruggedness is what he exuded and it excited the woman in her.

"Why were you crying this morning?" Cavanaugh asked suddenly. "Was it because of me?"

Nicole couldn't meet his gaze as she continued to massage his leg., "No, it wasn't you. Last night was amazing and I don't regret it at all." She looked up at him then and bit her lip. "Do you?"

Cavanaugh searched his soul for any ounce of regret and found none. He smiled and grabbed her arm, pulling her closer to him. He ran his knuckles down her cheek and kissed her brow, "No," he assured her.

He smiled when she sighed and leaned into him, wrapping her arms tight around him and just holding him close. Cavanaugh had needed this for a long time. He hadn't realized that companionship, affection and intimacy were what he needed but Nicole had given him all three and had healed a big part of what was broken within him.

"So, why were you crying?" Cavanaugh urged. "You know you can confide in me. I'll do what I can to help even if all ya need is somebody to listen."

Nicole looked up into his blue eyes and thanked God for this man. Sure he might not be willing to admit that he loved her though she knew he did however because if he didn't he never would have made love to her last night. Cavanaugh was not the kind of man to lay with a woman just to lay with her. She knew him enough to know that much was true.

He was warm, caring, protective, strong and patient. And there were no false pretenses like there had been with Brian. He didn't sugar coat words or say things he didn't mean just to make her happy. That was what she appreciated the most about him.

"Today is, was, my mom's birthday." she admitted as she let him hold her.

His big hands were rubbing comforting circles on her back as he rested his cheek on the top of her head, "You must really miss her," he whispered and she nodded against his chest.

It felt good to have someone she could talk to. Never once had Brian ever just tried to hold and comfort her. He'd been too busy holding Lisa. With Cavanaugh she had found friendship as well as passion and it was a new and wonderful thing she had never experienced. And she found that she trusted him completely. She had no fear that he would do anything behind her back to hurt her or betray her trust in him.

"I do," Nicole replied. "It was so hard to watch her be so sick for so long."

"I know," Cavanaugh said gently. "My mama was sick for a long time too. Jamison and I watched her waste away and she died shortly after Ian and Andrew made it home."

"I'm sorry, Cavanaugh," Nicole said lamely. She suddenly felt foolish for complaining in front of him. This man had lost a mother, a father, a wife and two children. What right did she have to complain?

"Pain is a part of life, Nicole. People like you and I learned that the hard way. Wasn't it you that told me you have to carry on afterward? That we have a choice about whether or not we let it break us?"

Nicole smiled despite the tears in her eyes and nodded as she gazed up at him, "Yes, I think I was."

"You're a very smart woman," Cavanaugh admitted.

Nicole gave him a knowing look and kissed him, "I'm going to buy some flowers and go to her grave today. Then I always drive an hour to her favorite restaurant and ordered us both something to eat."

Cavanaugh nodded and ran his fingers through her wet hair, "Would you like some company or is that something you want to do alone?"

Nicole frowned, "You don't want to come. I'm not very good company on days like today. I do a lot of reminiscing, quite a bit of crying and just to add a little spice I throw some moping in there too."

"If you'll have me, I want to be there. I have quite a few of those kinds of days myself so I'll understand."

Nicole gave him a teary, grateful smile and Cavanaugh felt the strongest urge to kiss her and this time he didn't worry about fighting it.

***

Ian paced the back porch and watched for Leslie and Madeline to come back to the barn. They'd been gone for hours. Nicole and Cavanaugh were gone for the day. Andrew and Bethany had left as well to go pick up some things that Bethany needed for her college classes that week. Ian found himself all alone and instead of napping (which is what he wanted to do) he was wearing a hole in the wooden porch watching for that damn woman and kid to get back.

What was taking them so long? Were they lost? Had some sort of critter gotten them? Bandits? Ian shook his head. There was no such thing as bandits anymore. Husbands?

Ian forced himself to sit down on one of the wicker chairs and he propped his elbow on his knee and laid his chin in his hand. He had known a few men that believed it was their right to knock their wives around. Some men just knocked any woman around simply because they were bigger, stronger and they could. Ian had never been that type of man.

Why hit and fight when you could kiss and love? That had always been his way of looking at things. He'd rather spend his time laughing, loving and having a good time than fussing, feuding and fighting and he would NEVER hit a woman. Women of every shape, size, age and color were far too beautiful to ever lay an angry hand or fist upon.

How had Leslie ended up married to a man like that? She was a nurse so that meant she was smart. Ian had watched some shows on that television and doctors and nurses knew a hell of a lot more nowadays than they did back in 1875.

Sure she wasn't all that pretty but he suspected that had more to do with worry and lack of sleep and food than it did her actual looks. She had nice hair and her gray eyes were the kind a man could get lost looking into. She knew how to use a gun, or at least she had seemed to when she had taken his, and she could ride a horse. Ian had seen the hint of a sense of humor in the woman at times and he'd be damned if she couldn't kick his ass at poker.

Why would a woman like that saddle herself down with a man who chose to beat her around? Ian shook his head and scolded himself. It wasn't none of his business what she chose to do and he shouldn't care. Hell he didn't care.

He moved to the longer wicker couch and laid down, throwing his legs over the end and putting his hat over his face. He rested his head on his arm and fought hard to fall asleep. A snorting horse had him jumping from the wicker couch and relief washed over him when he saw Leslie and Madeline going into the barn on Saraphine.

He forced himself to sit back down. What was wrong with him? A short time later Leslie and Madeline came out of the barn. Madeline ran up on the porch and jumped up on the wicker couch beside him, "Whatcha doin'?" she asked as she swung her feet.

"Wondering what your mama is gonna cook us for lunch," Ian replied, throwing a pointed glance at Leslie.

"Lunch?" Leslie demanded. "It's barely eleven o'clock."

"My stomach don't wear a watch," he stated grumpily. "All it knows is it's hungry."

"My stomach is hungry too," Madeline added, mimicking his posture by putting her elbows on her knees and frowning.

"I'll go see what I can find for you, sweetheart," Leslie told her daughter. She unhooked Ian's gun belt from her waist and laid it on the patio table.

Ian stood up and grabbed it and Leslie was unable to stop her eyes from following the motions as he cinched it tight around his lean hips. Frank had never been lean. He was big, ugly and mean. Ian was kind of mean too, truthfully. She had no idea why he suddenly kept glaring at her, muttering under his breath and being cross. She supposed maybe he was still upset over losing at poker the night before.

"While you're in there you might as well make enough for me," Ian stated. He looked at her and realized that her eyes were focused on his hips and Ian felt a jolt of arousal unlike anything he had ever in his life.

Their eyes met and he saw her gray eyes darken. Leslie was the one to break the contact, "Fine," she muttered and she was careful to keep distance between their bodies as she walked around him and into the house.

"I don't think my mommy likes you," Madeline said.

Ian grunted as he sat down in the wicker chair and stretched out his legs, "Yeah well, I don't like your mommy."