Chapter Eleven

"Oh my God!" Nicole exclaimed as she gave up on reading and tossed her novel on the coffee table.

The four men instantly turned their attention to her and frowned, "What's wrong?" Ian asked, tilting his head.

Nicole had always had good patience and she was used to having rambunctious toddlers around her but Andrew made all of them look like docile little creatures in comparison. Already this morning he had broken several lamps, put one hole through the wall with the bedroom door and spilled grape juice all over her brown suede couch. Not to mention the fact that Ian had shot the smoke alarm which had begun to go off when Jamison had nearly burnt the kitchen down when he had stuck canned biscuits in the oven on five hundred degrees and then walked off and left them. Add to that the fact that Cavanaugh seemed determined to do nothing but scowl at her this morning and Nicole was ready to tear her hair out!

"I think we're driving the woman a little crazy," Cavanaugh stated as he flipped through the guns and ammo magazine Nicole had found in the junk cabinet for him.

"No, it's just..." Nicole started but Andrew cut her off as he flopped down on the couch beside her and nearly made her fall sideways.

"We're just not used to being all cooped up is all," he stated. "And I ain't been this sober in a long long time."

"Mama wanted you to give up the whiskey, Andrew," Cavanaugh reminded him.

Andrew grinned, "Okay but she didn't say nothing about the beer," he countered and a smile tugged on Cavanaugh's firm lips.

Nicole felt her heart do a somersault in her chest at the sight and then Cavanaugh's blue eyes locked on hers and her heart stopped. Several long moments they stared at each other and Nicole suddenly wished that she could be a mind reader so that she would know what was going on behind that intense stare. He broke the connection, scowled and buried his nose back in the magazine.

"We're used to being kept real busy, Nicole," Jamison said with a shrug. "I guess we don't do being idle well."

"Yes my smoke alarm can attest to that fact." she stated and Ian rubbed the back of his neck guiltily. Nicole racked her brain in an attempt to come up with some idea of something to entertain the men for the day so she could have a little bit of peace and quiet and maybe save a few of her possessions from being destroyed.

Suddenly an image of her uncle Silas came to mind and had her smacking her forehead. Why hadn't she thought of him before?!

Cavanaugh raised his brow as he looked at her and frowned, "Why did you hit yourself?" he asked.

Nicole didn't appreciate the patronizing tone he used, "Because I felt like it." she snapped. Cavanaugh shrugged and looked back down at his magazine.

Nicole nearly jumped from her skin when she felt hands close around her shoulders and begin to rub the tense muscles in them. She quickly looked over her shoulder to see Ian smiling down at her, "I've been told that my hands can work magic." he promised with a wink and Nicole snorted with laughter before becoming a puddle beneath his massaging hands.

He really was good with them and she felt some of her tension melting away. Then his breath was on her ear and despite the fact that she knew he was bad news and she wasn't the least bit interested in him, she couldn't stop the trembling that washed down her spine when his breath caressed her skin, "So what had you smacking your head?" he whispered.

"Um...My uncle Silas. He's not really my uncle but I've always called him that," Nicole knew she was rambling a little but that was only because she had looked up and caught Cavanaugh watching her. His eyes had looked angry, jealous and hungry. He had quickly pulled his hat down and pretended to go back to reading but Nicole could still feel him watching her.

"And why did thoughts of him have you hitting that pretty forehead?" Ian asked. Nicole heard Jamison let out an exasperated snort and he rose from the armchair and walked into the kitchen.

"Ian, you're pathetic," Andrew added and Nicole saw him go down the hall and knew he was going to the playroom. He loved looking at all the toy trucks.

Ian stopped rubbing her shoulders and sighed as he came around the couch to sit beside her, "So tell me. Why did uncle Silas come to your mind?"

"Um..." Nicole shook her head to clear it. It might have been Ian's hands and breath touching her skin but it had been Cavanaugh's eyes she'd been looking into and his touch she'd been imagining. It had left her feeling flustered and off center, "He has a small ranch. He has some horses, cows and things. Plenty to keep you all busy for a couple of hours."

"Woohoo!" Andrew exclaimed as he came running back into the living room. "I haven't been on a horse in so long I forgot what one feels like!"

"I was thinking the same thing about a woman," Ian added with a grin and then his face flushed red and he grinned sheepishly as he looked at Nicole. "I mean...."

"That's okay, Ian. I understand," Nicole stated, biting the inside of her cheek to hold back her laughter.

"Yeah, Ian's a regular old monk. What's it been, brother? About a week?" Cavanaugh asked as he closed the magazine and tossed it on the coffee table.

"Don't be jealous, Cav," Ian grinned.

"I'm not." Cavanaugh replied, though Nicole noticed that his nostrils flared when he said so. They tended to flare when he was either lying or mad and she wondered why he'd be lying. Was he jealous? And if he was, why? Was it because Ian had been flirting with her or because he wanted a different woman every night the way Ian had no doubt had?

Nicole rubbed her temples. These men were causing her head to ache. Who said women were the only ones with mood swings?!

"Well everyone get ready and I'll take you to uncle Silas's. It's about thirty minutes away." she said as she stood up. She went up the stairs to go change out of her lounge pants.

Cavanaugh stood and grabbed Ian's arm once Nicole was gone, "What the hell are you doing?" he demanded.

"Trying my hand at landing the woman," Ian replied with a shrug as he pulled his arm from his brother's grasp.

"Don't you talk about her that way! She ain't some common saloon whore." Andrew scolded angrily as he came to stand beside Cavanaugh.

Ian rolled his eyes, "I never said she was."

"You don't really care about her, Ian. You just want to get into her bed," Cavanaugh said angrily as he pulled a rolled cigarette from his pocket. Nicole had gotten him tobacco and papers and it had surprised him greatly after how rude and standoffish he'd been toward her.

It wasn't fair, he knew, to treat her that way. She was a good person. Kind, funny, beautiful and warm. Sometimes she said things that made no sense and from time to time she had a childish temper but even those things he found endearing.

And therein lied the problem.

Cavanaugh had always been told he was loyal to a fault and he guessed that was right. When he looked at Nicole and became lost in those deep green eyes he became struck with guilt because it was like he was forgetting or betraying Leah and what they had shared together.

No matter how badly he may want to move on with his life, no matter how badly Nicole tempted him, he couldn't make that leap.

"I told you I was going to try my hand at courting her and you didn't say a word against it, big brother. As a matter of fact you told me to go ahead," Ian reminded him pointedly.

Ian let out a startled gasp when he felt a hand land on his shoulder and spin him around, "Let me tell you something right now, Ian," Jamison warned angrily, his blue eyes flashing with temper that was so unlike him. Even when angry Jamison was usually cool, calm and collected with everyone except perhaps Cavanaugh.

"Tell away," Ian insisted, flashing his brother a charming grin and a wink.

"That woman is an angel, a damn saint as far as I'm concerned, and if you hurt her I'll break your neck myself."

Ian looked insulted at first and then he sighed and put his hands up in surrender, "Alright. Alright. I'll back off. She wasn't taking me serious anyhow. I was just trying to ruffle Cav's feathers a little bit. Ya know, make him go after her himself."

Cavanaugh grumbled under his breath and limped angrily from the house.

"Back off of him." Andrew warned, always quick to come to Cavanaugh's defense.

"Dammit, Leah has been gone for a long time and there is something between him and Nicole and he just won't take a chance on it," Ian exclaimed.

"He'll get there when he's good and ready to," Andrew said as he reached up and swatted at the chains he had learned controlled a thing called a fan that hung on the ceiling and cooled the air.

"Or he won't," Jamison shrugged, "But either way we're brothers and we have to have each others backs, not play games and piss each other off."

"Yes sir," Ian stated with a mock salute. "Too bad you didn't feel that way when Cav's family was murdered. Might just have kept him from turning into such a quiet, withdrawn, moody, son of a bitch."

"Cavanaugh's family was murdered?" Nicole's voice whispered from behind them. Jamison scowled and smacked Ian on the back of the head while Ian placed a charming grin on his face and Andrew rubbed his hands on his thighs nervously.

"You didn't hear that." Ian assured her.

"I get it now. His family was murdered and he came to you for help and you didn't help him." she said accusingly as she looked up at Jamison.

"I couldn't," Jamison assured her.

"Did you do anything?" Nicole asked with shock.

"Go ahead, big lawman. Tell her," Ian urged.

Jamison shook his head and his jaw tightened, "No, I didn't do anything. Cavanaugh didn't even see what the men looked like that shot him and killed Leah and the kids. There was nothing I could have done."

"You could have done something! Tried at least!" Nicole insisted and Jamison shook his head.

"I stand by what I've said. There was nothing I could have done."

"I thought I told you to quit asking my brothers about me?" Cavanaugh growled from the open door and all four turned to stare at him with different degrees of guilt.

"I didn't," Nicole said quickly. "They were talking while I was upstairs and I just happened to come down and hear them say...." her voice trailed off.

Cavanaugh shifted his weight to his good leg and held his hands out as if putting himself on display, "Happy now? You know all my deep dark secrets. I had a wife and two kids and they were brutally murdered while I lay unconscious and bleeding out in the yard. Will that help you sleep better tonight? Now that you know what's made me the man that I am standing here?"

Nicole didn't know what to say. For once in her life she was completely speechless. What she wanted to do was run to him, throw her arms around him and promise him that everything would be okay. He looked so sad, desperate and broken standing there. Sure he was trying to mask it all with anger but she could still see the pain.

"Cavanaugh..." she whispered.

Cavanaugh shook his head and turned away from them, "We gonna go do some work or sit around talking about our damn feelings all day?" he growled and then he walked out the door.

Ian, Jamison, Andrew and Nicole all looked at each other and Ian shook his head, "I believe this is one of those moments that we each need a boot stuck up our ass."

"I want to help him," Nicole stated as she turned her gaze to the now empty doorway. Her heart was crying out in pain for that man.

"He won't let nobody help him," Jamison countered.

"You have no right to judge him now, Jamison. I know you want to seem tough and untouchable but in your brothers darkest moment, when he came to you, you turned your back on him. Is that really the kind of man you are?" Nicole demanded before storming out of the house.

Ian raised a brow and looked at Jamison, "She sure told you off."

"Yeah she did," Jamison muttered as he stared down at his boots. He was a six and a half foot, two-hundred and thirty pound man and right now he felt about two inches tall.

He had respect for Nicole. She was a woman that lived alone and had built a good life. She made her own way and didn't need anyone to help her. He was fond of her and already valued her opinion. The fact that her opinion had cut him down to size simply made him respect her more. She was brave and she had a fighting spirit. She may just be what all of them needed.

She was right too. Jamison was finally man enough to admit it. He was a monster. He hadn't been raised to be cold-hearted and honestly he couldn't even remember exactly when it had happened but it had happened. He had a good damn woman that he just kept stringing along and he had a good damn brother who had had everything he loved ripped away from him and Jamison had done nothing to try to help. He knew it was nearly impossible that they would ever find the men who had committed the crime and he hadn't wanted to waste precious time in building his reputation to chase after dead ends.

But what if....

"Ian, you had a lot of contact with Cav and his family, right?"

Ian frowned at the look of concentration and determination on his oldest brother's face, "Yeah that's right. I went and stayed there quite a bit when I was through that way. Why?"

"Did he talk about having enemies?"

"It's been over three years, Jamison. You're a little late in asking these questions."

"Dammit, Ian, just answer me." Jamison exclaimed.

Ian shook his head as he crossed his arms over his chest, "You know how Cav was before. He was the type of man that didn't have enemies."

"Gangs then. They attacked him on his way back from town. Could it have been...."

"You'll have to ask him, Jamison. Cav don't talk about it."

Jamison nodded and then all but ran out the door. Now that the lawman had been awakened within him it was impossible to silence, "Cav!" he called and Cavanaugh turned to face him from where he stood beside the truck.

Nicole was on the porch just watching Cavanaugh and Jamison knew in his heart that that woman had been sent from heaven above, a gift from their mama, not just for Cavanaugh, but for all of them.

"What?" Cavanaugh asked as he rubbed his aching left thigh.

Jamison crossed the ground to him and searched his face, hoping his brother would see his willingness to help, "I am sorry about Leah and the babies. I'm sorry I didn't help when you asked and I'm sorry I turned my back on you and ruined whatever relationship we had. I was a bastard." Jamison stopped and Cavanaugh just raised a brow and looked at him. If his brother wanted an argument he certainly wasn't going to get one.

"Look, Cav, I want to help. I need to know if anybody was mad at you or if anybody had something against you or against Leah...." The words no sooner left Jamison's mouth and Cavanaugh's nostrils flared and his fist shot out, catching his brother in the jaw and sending him stumbling backward.

Jamison's hat fell to the ground and he grabbed his face staring in shock at his brother. He had punched Cavanaugh a few times in their life but never once had Cavanaugh hit him. Cavanaugh had always been a peaceful kind of man.

"Don't you try to say I caused what happened and don't you dare try to say it was Leah's fault. You didn't see what those men did to her. You can take your questions and you can go to hell. You're about three and half years too late, big brother."

Cavanaugh turned and threw open the back door of the truck before climbing in. Jamison picked his hat up and beat it against his leg to get the dirt off of it.

"I'm guessing that didn't go too well?" Ian asked as he and Andrew stepped onto the porch.

Nicole shook her head, "Not well at all." she replied, feeling tears in her throat. Poor Cavanaugh. A wife and children? All murdered for no apparent reason and no one had helped him. It was no wonder the man was the way he was. Instantly Nicole knew she had to help him heal.

Whatever it took she was going to stand by him. She could feel the connection between them. She knew it was there. She just had to convince Cavanaugh to stop ignoring it and fighting against it.