I wasn't surprised when I woke up to an empty bed. Not that surprised, anyway.

I would've thought that after last night, after a heated and tiring round of sex and then his midnight writing-moment, he would've maybe felt the urge to sleep in this morning, but once again, he seemed adamant to prove he wasn't wholly human. 

Yawning and leaning in the doorway to his study, I watched through the gaps in his protruding bookshelf how he was already bent over at his desk, writing more math onto a crisp piece of paper. He didn't seem to have heard me get up, or maybe he was too indifferent to care, but nonetheless, I slowly walked further into the study and braced my body in my own hands as the morning cold nipped at my skin. My silk robe laid next to his chair. 

"You really don't know how to relax, do you?" I voiced, coming up beside him by his desk. 

He didn't look up from his papers, but merely grunted distractedly. "Good morning."

"Don't mind me," I said, quickly frisking my robe up from the floor and slipping it on. "I won't disturb anymore. You're obviously busy." Busy was an understatement. He was so completely absorbed in his work, he did not even bother to look up and provide me with a glance.

Giving me another grunt as reply, I pursed my lips at him, but then turned to leave. I walked out of the door to his study and up the stairs to my room, to take a long and needed shower. He didn't try and stop me.

I had never met a man more fond of his work than Harry, and a part of me admired him for his dedication and his commitment. 

Another part of me felt hollow as I walked upstairs, feeling that void inside my stomach and the ache in my chest that shouldn't be there. It shouldn't. 

Focus on work, I told myself like a mantra as I came inside my room and headed straight for the bathroom. I stripped down and got into the shower, turned on the water and took a deep breath. 

If Harry could do it, so could I. 

Be emotionless. 

~~~

My days seemed to be a constant repetition of themselves; waking up, showering, studying, sleeping with Harry and falling asleep. Not necessarily always in that order. 

After showering and eating some breakfast, I had quickly grabbed the book I needed from Harry's study, careful not to interrupt him as he spoke on the phone with someone as I entered. I grabbed the book off the shelf, and then I was out again. He was focused on work, and so was I. 

The next couple of hours had been spent studying and finally solving the last piece of the assignment that I had spent days trying to understand. It was around late noon that I with a relieved, yet happy sigh laid my pen down and rolled over onto my back. 

Done! Fifth assignment was finally done. 

After a short moment of laying on my back and enjoying the bliss, I then pulled myself up again and took a deep breath. On to the next. I was two assignments away from having completed all of his folders, and the victory and the satisfaction of having accomplished that was almost graspable. I wanted to get them done and prove to myself, but also to Harry, that I could be more than what I was.

So, gathering all my papers and my assignment, I left my room and headed down the stairs, once again finding myself repeating my every day schedule. When I came to his door, I didn't knock, but walked right in as I had grown a habit of doing. I still wasn't surprised when I came in to see Harry still doing his math. 

Standing in front of his blackboard, back facing me, I could only see his arm moving and hear the sound of the chalk writing against the board as I came closer. I cleared my throat to make sure he heard me enter, but then laid my folder down on his desk. "I finished it."

"One moment." He continued to write for said moment, but then took a step back and looked over his text. Then, turning towards me, he raised a brow. "You finished assignment number 5?"

"Tell me if I passed it," I begged as he picked up the folder and opened it, adjusting his glasses on his nose before reading. "This was a real pain in my ass, so if I didn't do it right, I might actually burn this house down."

His lips twitched as he read. "I told you they would get harder as you worked your way up."

"I know, I know." I waited impatiently as he turned a page and read my answer. "So did I do it? Is it right?"

He was quiet for a long moment this time, reading the end of my assignment answer. Then, closing the folder, he took of his glasses and sighed. I held my breath. 

"Congratulations," He then said, causing me to exhale loudly. His lips turned slightly upwards. "You move on to assignment number six."

"Fuck, yes!" I fistpumped the air as Harry dug out the sixth folder from under some papers on his desk. He might be able to constantly control his emotions, but right now I was fucking proud of myself and I was going to show it. "Yes, yes, yes, yes! In your face, math!"

I grabbed the new folder from his hand and watched as he chuckled quietly before he took a seat in his chair. He ran a tired hand through his hair, but then exhaled and closed his eyes. It looked like his lack of sleep was finally catching up to him. 

I rested on my hip for a moment, watching him carefully, but then came closer. I took a seat on the edge of his desk and then looked down at him with a pursed lips. "You look like you need more sleep."

He lifted his eyes to mine and smiled calmly. "Do I now?"

"Yes," I stated as-a-matter-of-factly and watched him lean back in his seat and cross his arms. "When was the last time you had a full night's sleep?"

"The night before you started occupying my bed."

I gave him a flat stare when his sarcasm didn't amuse me. Leaning forward, I poked him in the middle of his chest. "Someone as smart as you should know how important sleep is. And what will happen if you don't get it."

He smiled silently. Then, leaning his chin on his knuckles, he peered up at my face with that rare curiosity I saw in his eyes whenever he found something interesting, besides math. "And pray tell, Ms Berry, what were you doing last night? I believe you weren't sleeping either."

"I," I said, leaning down to his lips, pausing only a hair's breadth away. I stared down into his eyes and watched him look back up at me, those amber irises so fucking irresistible. "...was sucking your cock and getting orgasm after orgasm as you fucked me," I whispered, seeing his eyes not even as much as waver at my crass words. "That's what I was doing last night, Mr Devon. Tell me if I need to further elaborate. Verbally or visually. I can do both."

His eyes twinkled with bemusement. Shifting in his seat, he then sighed against my lips as I licked my own. "I think my memory is sufficient enough."

"Well, they say old age makes people forget more easily."

"Are you insinuating that you think I'm old?" His voice lowered as he lifted a sharp brow. God, why did that look turn me on?

"You are 14 years older than me," I reminded him, in case he had forgotten. See? I was funny. 

"Mm." He hummed quietly, but kept staring up at me with that thoughtful look. His finger slowly rubbed his chin, perhaps unconsciously.

He had never treated me below my age, except for when he carried me upstairs that night I had chosen to attack his liquor stash. Although that hadn't been for the lack of my age, but rather the lack of my judgement. Or so he said.

I slowly leaned down closer, so close my lips now grazed his. I kept my eyes on him and watched him gaze back up at me, his pupils slowly expanding...

I might've been a girl compared to him in age, but he always treated me like a woman. 

And fuck, it was a turn on.

Leaning down the last inch, my lips had barely pressed against his when a sudden sound startled the crap out of me. I gasped and pulled back, only to realize it was just someone knocking on the door. Harry chuckled quietly. 

"Enter," He called out. 

Gathering my composure and putting it back into my panties, I turned just in time to see the maid, Giselle awkwardly poking her head inside again. This was becoming too trivial for me. 

"Yes?" Harry calmly asked with a little smile. He didn't seem the least bit fazed that I was still sitting on his lap while his young staff member was watching. Okay, so maybe we hadn't been too subtle either way...

"Pardon me, but there's someone at the door," Giselle said, her eyes twitching towards me. Another visitor? For a man with no friends, I was getting tired of their non-existence always interrupting us. 

"I'm not expecting anyone. Did you get a name?" Harry asked with a little cock of his brow.

Giselle's eyes fled to me again. "A Ms Anthea Berry."

My jaw dropped. Mom?

I felt Harry turn his eyes up at me as my heart started racing and my stomach seemed to drop like my jaw. She was here? What the hell was she doing here?

"Should I... let her in?" Giselle carefully asked. 

It took me a moment to realize that the question had been for me. The only reason I realized that was because I turned my eyes to look at Harry for help. Should I let her in? 

I met Harry's eyes, and like the open book I had to currently be, he gave my hand a small clench to make me snap out of my daze. "I can send her away if you'd like."

Send her away? 

After our last talk, I was still kind of sensitive, and usually I knew my mom pretty well enough to know why she did things. If she was here, she was either here to give me a lecture or get me to come home. I didn't care for either one. 

"Miss...?" Giselle hesitantly voiced when I had been quiet for too long. 

"I..." I abruptly stood up when I realized what was happening. I arose from Harry's lap and took a deep breath. "I... n-no. Let her in."

I glanced back at Harry who gave a single nod, before gesturing to Giselle to follow orders. She immediately backed out of the room and towards the front door. I knew I had seconds before she came in. 

"Don't tell her about... anything," I said, looking at Harry for his confirmation. If my mom was here to lecture me, I didn't need her to lecture me about my pick in who I slept with. 

Harry gave another small nod, but I then heard the sound of my mother's shrill voice in the foyer. I took a last deep breath before bracing myself and walking out there. 

"Darling!"

My mom piped up the second I stepped out of Harry's office and instantly opened her arms for a hug. 

"There you are, sweetheart. I kept telling them I was your mother, but apparently, this place is the next Pentagon," She said and shot a glare at Giselle who had stepped back and lowered her gaze. 

"She was only doing her job, mom," I explained and reluctantly stepped into her hug. I curled my arms around her for comfort, but only got the two seconds of brief motherly warmth I had grown up with before she pulled back and looked around. 

"Well, in any case, I think a mother should be able to come see her daughter without questions being asked," She replied, finally turning her eyes towards me. "I figured since you wouldn't come see me, I should come see you."

"I told you, I've been working," I said, watching her wave her hand dismissively at me, like work was a bad excuse not to see one's family. 

"And I haven't seen my daughter in almost three months! One phone call since you left? Whatever you're doing can't be that important, Cassy. I'm your mother, for goodness sake."

Yes. And it's not like you've tried to call me, have you? "I know. And it's good to see you," I mumbled, trying to smile when she bloomed at my words. She then turned her eyes around again to the marbled foyer. 

"My word, what exactly is this place?" She asked and looked as Giselle trotted off into the kitchen. "Maid staff, front gate guards? Who is this man you're working for?"

"I—"

"Harry Devon," I suddenly heard his voice behind me. I spun around to see him coming out of his study, a polite smile on his face. "Mrs Berry, I presume?"

As expected, my mother's eyes slightly widened and she couldn't hide the obvious glance she took of him as he came towards her. One of the many bad traits I had inherited from her; the lack of ability to hide my pleasant surprise. 

I watched as my mother did what I had done the first day I arrived here; I saw her eyes trail up Harry's polished, albeit slightly tired-looking body and face, taking in the same features I had gawked at in the very same fashion my mom currently was. After a full moment of blatantly glaring, she finally snapped out of it and cleared her throat as Harry extended his hand towards her. 

"Well," She said, shaking his hand politely. Her eyes drifted towards me. "Now I understand why you didn't want to leave this place."

I cringed inwardly. Palming my face, I sighed as Harry merely smiled tightly and took a step back. "Your daughter is a very bright young woman. It's easy to see where she gets it from," He smiled. "She's been a pleasure to teach."

Always the gentlemen. I wish my mom would take after him. 

"Oh, and I'm sure the pleasure has been likewise," She chuckled knowingly, as if she was picturing me in some gaudy porn scenario, sitting behind some tiny class table, giggling behind my hand while the handsome professor taught up—you know what, I was going to hold that thought right there before I barfed. 

"Ah, mom, I know you said you didn't need a reason to come see me, but can I ask you why you're here?" I said, hoping my voice wasn't too stiff. "I mean... a phone call would've made due, too..."

"I told you, sweetheart," She said and turned towards me. I watched as her face turned into that stern one I had grown up with and knew to dread. Here we go. "If your job is tearing you away from your family, then maybe it's time to reconsider if it's worth it or even the right path. Nothing is more important than family, Cassy. No offense, Mr Devon."

"Actually," I said, gritting my teeth in hopes of stopping the anger from seeping through them. "I told you that this was for my future and that it's important, mom. I'm not trying to get away from you—" maybe just a little, "—I just couldn't pass up an opportunity like this."

"I know that, and I didn't stop you from going, did I? I just thought you might want to come home and visit at least once a month, or come by when I invite you to something that was really important to me." My mom replied back, harshly. "I let you live your life as you want it, Cassandra, but I expect to get mutual respect from you in return. All I asked for was one dinner. That's hardly too much."

I was beginning to lose it. Her example would've been great if it wasn't for the fact that she always asked for so much more. She hadn't 'let me live my life', she hadn't taken enough interest in it to help guide me through it. Maybe if she had done that, I would've been more inclined to come to the dinners with the men that only lasted weeks. Maybe then I wouldn't have minded the short glimpses of love I felt from her, if only I had felt them more growing up. 

A short silence fell after her little speech. I simply looked at the floor, feeling Harry looking at me, as well as my mom. Both were expecting me to say something, but I couldn't find anything to say that wouldn't start an argument. And I really wasn't in the mood for another argument. 

"I'm sorry," I therefore said, feeling my chest deflate when I once again caved in and let her win another fight. "I should've... come over when you asked. I guess... I guess I got too caught up in... in all of this."

I could feel the disappointed stare on my back, coming from Harry, but who the hell was he to judge me. Just because he never let his brother win a single fight, didn't mean everyone else should, too. Some things were more important than winning. When my time was done here, I would have no one else to come to but my mom. If I destroyed my relationship with her over something stupid like winning an argument, then what would I be left with? 

My mom stepped forward, and feeling her arms come around me, she hugged me tightly for exactly two seconds before drawing back. "I know you're excited about all of this. I want you to go to college as much as you do, but I just don't want you to lose sight of who you are while you're getting there. Now, I drove three hours for this because I figured you wouldn't hear me out over the phone. And I missed my baby girl, so here I am."

She pulled me in for another brief hug, and I weakly hugged her back, hating the tears pressing in my eyes. Sometimes I wondered what it would be like to have grown up with another mother...  

"I'll call for some tea," Harry voiced behind us, after a moment. We both turned to look at him. 

"Oh, no, that's quite alright," My mom said, giving him a polite smile. "I won't be staying long. I'm meeting up with my boyfriend later tonight, so I best get on the road again or I'll be late. It's a long drive out here."

And just like that, I felt the punch in my chest. 

I was supposed to sacrifice time out of my day to drive three hours back and fourth to see her, meet her boyfriend and make conversation, but she couldn't even stay fifteen minutes for tea for her own daughter, because of a date with her new boyfriend. 

This was why I had to succeed with this. I had to get away. 

"I see," Harry said, and I could once again hear the judgement in his voice. I ignored it, because I just couldn't deal with it right now. If anything, I felt humiliated. 

"Now don't forget to call me, sweetheart," My mom cupped my face and smiled up at me. "And come visit me the next time. Summer's almost done, and before I know it, you're off to college and will be too busy to come visit me again. Just remember to make time for what's most important, Cassy. I love you very much."

"I love you, too," I said, hearing how dead my own voice sounded. If my mom noticed, she didn't comment. 

After a last fleeting hug, she kissed my cheek and bid Harry a farewell, before walking back out the same way she came from. The second the large front doors closed, a piercing silence fell in the foyer, a silence that only seemed to enhance the broken sound my heart was making. 

I should've been used to this. I should have. This was my whole life in a brief summary, and yet as I heard the sound of her car rushing down the graveled path towards the road to avoid traffic, I felt my chest compress so much, it physically hurt to breathe. 

Closing my eyes, I suddenly became aware that Harry was still in the foyer with me when I heard his shoes slowly walking towards me. I opened my eyes again and gritted my teeth, not in the mood to hear his verdict. "I swear to God, if you say anything right no—"

"If that's what you came from, then I've truly underestimated you."

My lips silently parted, and turning around on my heel, I looked speechlessly up at Harry who stood with his hands in his pockets and watched me silently. There was a new kind of respect in his eyes. 

I pressed my lips together and crossed my arms. "I thought you said it was clear to see where I got my intelligence from."

"It is," He said and now stepped closer. "Not from her. No offense."

My lips twitched, only because I couldn't help it. I saw his own twitch back, but then my headache reminded me of the migraine I knew that was about to hit me. "I want a drink."

"How's red wine?"

My eyes flipped up. Did he just... not make a fuss? "I... yes?"

"Wait here for a moment." 

Leaving me standing in the foyer, I watched as he walked towards the staircase that led downstairs to the basement, down to where I knew he kept his liquor. I waited for almost two minutes before I finally heard his footsteps ascend again, coming up the stairs. 

He appeared in the doorway, holding a bottle of red wine and two wine glasses, but curiously enough, also had a thick blanket with him. I watched as he closed off the doors to the basement and then nodded me along. "Come on."

"Where are we going?" I questioned when I followed him, seeing him walk back towards the patio. 

"A walk. I've been told I have a large backyard."

A walk? He was taking me on a walk? ... What? "Are you sure you're not too busy for that?" I asked and rose a brow as he opened the patio doors for me. "You know, math-wise?"

He chuckled a little and shot me a glare as I passed him by.  "I think I'll manage, just this once."

– And here I thought his pulse depended on him solving math every day.

• • •

Let's do some mommy issues for once.