After that awful experience at my first meet-and-greet session, I was determined that any future novels I wrote should be published with my actual full name, Gina Yap Lai Yoong. I couldn't be bothered if it would affect book sales; I would rather be true to myself. When my second novel was published, it sold ten times more in a year than my debut novel, proving to my first publisher that they were racist and my readers were not.

In fact, my readers are a friendly bunch. Though they are mostly Malay, I do not see us as different. We talk about books, discuss stories, laugh at jokes and simply befriend each other despite our skin colour. The fact that we are Malaysians gives us a common ground to bond.

At the grassroots level, we are united. In our daily interactions, we are harmonious. It is the country leaders with their political agendas who are trying to make us think we are racist and against each other. And if we are insecure about who we are, we would fall into their trap and play the racist game for them. What do I mean? Do you seriously think seeing a cross-like structure on your window will turn you into a Christian? How insecure are you in your religion for thinking that way? I refuse to be sucked into such a racist game by insecure leaders. It's merely a waste of time.

Recently I was interviewed by a Malay journalist who presented me with one of the most challenging media interviews I have ever done; he was playing the racist card. He asked me in several different ways why I chose to write in Malay. Apparently my love for the language is not a sufficient answer. Then he asked me if the Malay language has anything to do with the Malay community and Islam religion; I illustrated it to him as follows:

The writer = the driver

The language = the type of vehicle

The journey and final destination = the story

Since I am the driver, I can choose any vehicle model I would like to drive and I'll still arrive at the same destination, albeit with a different journey experience. What does it matter? My novels featured Malaysian characters—Malay, Chinese, Indian, Orang Asli—and the language in which the stories were told does not make my books more Malay/Islamic inclined in any way possible.

I sat up straight and began to focus on our conversation. It was only his second question and I was beginning to see that he was not interested in my writing journey; he only wanted to grill me on my choice of language and trigger a racist response.

"Malay is the language of unity in our country, yet what is happening right now is the reverse. What are your thoughts?" he asked and pushed his audio recorder closer to my side of the table. I didn't like where the interview was going.

"If you are suspicious of me, a non-Malay, writing in Malay and cannot accept that my love for the language is the drive behind my choice of the language, how can it be a language of unity in our country? If non-Malays are not encouraged to use the Malay language because every time we do, the Malays are suspicious of us, then how can it be a language of unity?"

I was hitting a raw nerve and I knew it. I gulped down my glass of iced tea as he sat speechlessly. For a moment, we sat silently in our own thoughts. I wished he could understand that the Malay language can only be a language of unity if everyone is allowed to use it without being judged.

"It is said that the Malay language is connected with the spirit of patriotism. If Malaysians do not embrace the language, could it be that they are less patriotic?" He picked up his pen and was ready to write my response as if the audio recorder was not sufficient. Seriously, it wasn't even the month of August or September, why were we discussing patriotism in January?

I honestly think patriotism has nothing to do with language; it has nothing to do with race, religion, or politics. It has everything to do with individual self-discovery and personal identity. The spirit of patriotism is birthed forth from our security in our personal identity. That's why personal self-discovery is essential. The more we allow ourselves to discover who we are, the better we know the person we are to be, the more confident we are with our identity. Maybe that's what is lacking in our country: self-discovery.

The Internet has changed the way we live life. With information at our fingertips at all time, do we pause to reflect and embed in us the knowledge we come across? Do we spend time to think about the new discoveries we unearth online? Do we think for ourselves or merely take in all that is presented to us via social media newsfeed?

Information is spreading so fast now that if we pause to digest, we might miss the next wave of information. So what do we generally do? We stop digesting and we simply consume. But because we stop digesting, we stop thinking about whether what we are consuming is good or bad for us; we start going with the flow. And who benefits from this? The information creators who eventually become masters that steer our life.

For example: one day we are consuming lots of green tea because the newsfeed says it will help us lose weight. The next day we stop consuming green tea because the newsfeed says it has side effects on our body. The third day, something else pops up and we find ourselves hanging dried green tea bags in our wardrobe to ward away bad odour. Why are we blindly adhering to the information fed to us? Why aren't we discovering things for ourselves to lead to better decision making of our principles and beliefs?

Another example: Someone posted online about a Chinese snatch thief who stole from a Malay lady, which led to people thinking that most snatch thieves were Chinese. Then a week later, the news reported of a Malay snatch thief and now people started to think he learned it from the Chinese. Thus, overnight it became a sensational racial discussion. But in actual fact, the root was rather simple—be careful of snatch thieves regardless of their race.

People become racist when they don't know or are insecure in who they are. They become defensive when one of their own is being attacked because belonging to a group gives them an identity. But why must the groups be Malay, Chinese, Indian, and others? Why can't we just be in one group—Malaysians?

There is a need for Malaysians to understand that their personal identity matters. It is crucial for them to spend time to reflect and discover themselves for who they are. And in that personal self-discovery, to learn to embrace their personal identity. A person who is confident in him/herself is able to identify their own beliefs and principles in life and will do all that it takes to find ways to live out to their full potential.

When you know what you want in life, you know where to go and how to achieve it. No point complaining about the ever-warm weather in Malaysia; move to another cooler country because the weather is not people-controlled. No point whining about the differences of other races if you're not open to accepting the beauty of a multicultural country because again, it is not people-controlled; instead, you can decide if you want to live in this country or not. Take the foreigners who come and reside in Malaysia—ask them what attracted them besides the warm weather and you might realize that some of them just love our multicultural diversity; they love Malaysia just for that and they choose to live here because that's what they want in life!

Back to the question: what does the Malay language have to do with patriotism? Nothing. For me, patriotism is birthed when one is secure in his/her personal identity. Those who, upon embracing their personal identity, choose to stay in Malaysia are the ones who will really love the country and be proud to be a Malaysian.