Disclaimer: I do NOT own Gravity Falls. I just like writing shtuff...

A/N: I can't portray characters that well??? I'm so so sorry

Dipper grinned in excitement. This discovery was flippin' awesome! The mailbox could answer any question he thought of, and it could help him loads with the mysteries and anomalies happening in Gravity Falls.

Now, what should he ask next?

What's the meaning of life? Why is Gravity Falls such a magnet for the supernatural? How was the universe created? Will Wendy--NOPE. He shook away that thought.

Are there other worlds and dimensions besides theirs'? Do other forms of life live in their plane of existence? What exactly is Bill and why did the Author--

His eyes widened in realization. Of course! Why didn't he think of it sooner! He grabbed the paper and quickly wrote on it. Soos tilted his head in curiosity and leaned towards Dipper, trying to see what the younger boy was writing. "What 'cha writin', dood?"

Dipper finished writing and showed the question to the camera (and Soos). "Sha-bam!"

"Woah, the identity of the Author? Dood, you are a genius!"

Dipper merely grinned and eagerly put the piece of paper in the mailbox.

This is it! He'll finally get to know who the Author is! He had so many questions he wanted to ask him, and nevermind if he didn't know him and where he lives. He could just ask the mailbox for said data and he'll be off!

(This could be considered "cheating" since he depended on the all-knowing mailbox for the information he wanted and didn't use his own intellect to discover the answers themselves but hey! He was getting desperate.)

Though, yes, he was still quite young to go to places far from home without any supervision (not that he needed it!) and he wasn't even sure that the Author was still alive. He didn't dwell on these possible minor setbacks for long.

The mailbox's flag rose.

The pre-teen reached for the mailbox's handle. Oh gosh, this is it, this is it. His hands started shaking with sheer excitement and hecouldn'tstopshakingandhestoppedreachingforthemailboxand--

"What 're yah waitin' for, dood? Open it."

Soos gave him a thumbs up for support. That gave Dipper the determination to open the mailbox's door. He grabbed the letter inside and faced the camera.

"Alright, guys. Moment of truth-"

The letter was opened and he carefully unfolded the paper. He grinned in excitement. This is it!

"-the Author is--!"

Eyes widened, Dipper froze. No. Way.

This is--! Impossible!

This couldn't be-- How? Why?

Soos looked at the brunet with worry. The boy had been so elated earlier but when he read the paper, his jubilant exterior turned to disbelief.

"Dood?"

A joke. This had to be a joke, cause there's no way this was true.

It's not possible that the Author is-

The older man came closer with the camera and peeked at the parchment Dipper held. He, too, had froze. The camera had been unknowingly turned to see the name written.

Written on the paper was the name of-

"...Grunkle Stan?"