Cal's assumption that I slept with Theo has a slew of emotions running through me. I feel angry, then I want to laugh, and then a small amount of hope comes bubbling to the surface.

He's jealous. Perhaps he's not as caught up in April as last night led me to believe.

"What?" I ask innocently, neither confirming or denying his assumption.

Cal stares me down, then slowly shakes his head. "No," he says softly, sounding as if he's trying to convince himself. "No... no," he says again. When I only look back at him, he turns around to look at Theo. "She didn't stay here," he says as a statement, rather than a question.

Theo frowns. "She did..." he answers.

Cal inhales sharply and reaches up to grab at his hair. He looks like he's ready to pull it out.

"Come on, Cal," Theo says, his tone suggesting that Cal should know better. "It's not like that."

"Not like what?" Cal snaps, then takes a deep breath as if trying to calm himself. He continues to stare down Theo and then he looks back to me. "No," he says for the fourth time and then begins to laugh softly. "Fuck, of course it's not like that."

What's that supposed to mean?

"I'm sorry, guys," he apologizes, "I don't know what I was thinking. I know you wouldn't..." He uses a hand to gesture back and forth between Theo and I and lets out another laugh.

I don't know what about this is funny to him. I'm not sure which is worse, that he would assume I had sex with Theo or that he is so sure that it couldn't happen.

Theo picks up the two plates and puts them down on the table. He pulls out a chair and nods toward it, then pulls out another chair and sits down himself. "Did you want something to eat, Cal?" he asks while he sprinkles some pepper over his eggs. He's so casual, acting as if this entire situation isn't weird as hell.

Cal shakes his head and watches me as I cross the kitchen to sit down in the chair that Theo pulled out for me.

Theo offers me the pepper without a word, and I accept it from his hand and shake some over my eggs.

Cal steps toward the table and grabs the back of the chair beside me. "What the fuck is going on?" he asks in a weird voice that sounds amused, confused, and verging on anger all at once.

I look at Theo, but he just keeps eating his eggs. I follow his lead and do the same.

"Theo?" Cal pushes when he doesn't get a reply.

Theo looks up at him and then at me. He shovels the last few bites of eggs into his mouth and then stands up. "What's going on?" he repeats Cal's question thoughtfully, then shrugs his shoulders. "I'm going to work. You're getting a mailbox. She's... Well, right now, it looks like she's eating eggs." He carries his plate to the sink and rinses it off, then picks up a set of keys from the counter. "Call me if you need anything. I mean it, Cal. See you later, Emilia. Maybe."

He walks out of the kitchen with Cal right behind him.

"What the hell, man?" I hear Cal's voice as they walk to the front door.

"What?" Theo asks nonchalantly.

"You're really not going to explain anything to me?" Cal questions as their voices grow more distant.

"Nope," Theo replies. I hear the door open and then Theo's voice once more. "Talk to her, Cal. And don't be a dick."

The door shuts and Cal walks back into the kitchen and stands at the table, across from where I'm sitting. "Do you want to go get breakfast?" he asks, attempting to sound casual. He doesn't pull it off the same way that Theo does though.

I look down at my half eaten eggs and then back up at Cal.

"You like waffles better," Cal says, attempting to appeal to my sweettooth.

"It's five in the morning."

"So we'll go in a couple hours?" he offers with a shrug.

I take another bite of egg and then nod my head.

Cal taps his fingertips against the surface of the table. "Okay, great. Uh, I'm going for a jog. Do you want to come?"

I pull a face, and Cal chuckles.

"Yeah, I didn't think you'd wanna..." He lets the sentence hang and remains hovering by the table, like he knows he shouldn't leave but isn't sure what else to say.

I raise an eyebrow at him, waiting for him to say more or to ask me about Theo. When he doesn't, I give my head a small shake, then look back down at my plate and go back to eating my eggs.

I'm taking a page out of Theo's book, and making Cal work for the answers he's looking for, instead of spilling my guts just because he's jumped to conclusions.

Cal drums his fingers against the table again and lets out a long breath. "Right, so... I'll see you later?"

I nod, without looking up at him.

A loud bang rings through the kitchen when Cal forcefully shakes the chair he's standing behind, making it smack against the table.

My head snaps up, and Cal's eyes bore into mine. He releases the back of the chair and slaps his hands against the surface of the table. Then leans forward, over the chair and part of the table, to bring his face closer to mine. "Why are you in Theo's house, Emy?" he demands, like he's some sort of investigator and I'm the prime suspect who's just been brought in for questioning.

"Your bro Theo told you not to be a dick," I remind him while I cross my arms over my chest.

"You forget what me being a dick looks like. This is nothing," he sneers.

"Is that a threat?"

My words seem to startle him, and he straightens his back and drops his hands to his sides. "No, why would I—You're trying to upset me. Why?"

Now I'm the one who's feeling a little startled. I expected him to keep yelling at me, and I was sort of looking forward to yelling back. But now he's just looking at me with a troubled, hurt expression.

How do I even answer his question?

Fuck, maybe I should have just let him go for a run instead of lifting my eyebrow at him and forcing him into this conversation. It would have been helpful to have some time to think about how I was going to approach this.

"I'm not trying to upset you," I answer, even though I sort of was.

I'm given a skeptical look, but he doesn't challenge my claim. "Why are you at Theo's?" he asks again.

"You're not the only one who gets horny." The words pour out of my mouth before I can think them through.

Cal takes a step back, as if I literally threw the words at him, but then he frowns and shakes his head. "No, don't give me that shit. Theo wouldn't... Wait, what?" He reaches up to rub the back of his neck and awkwardly shuffles his feet. "The glass by the sink this morning..."

"Yup," I confirm his train of thought, "I heard all about your naughty kitten."

He winces and inhales sharply. "Fuck."

"Yeah, I heard the beginning of that too, but thankfully I finally realized you have a backdoor in the kitchen."

"Damn, Emy," he says, sounding apologetic. "We didn't mean for you to hear that..."

"Well, I did, Cal!" I loudly explain as I stand up.

I've lost my appetite. Theo should have only made me one egg like I asked for. I scrape the remainder of the eggs into the garbage, and my plate clatters against Theo's when I drop it into the sink.

"I'm sorry, okay?" Cal says. He walks after me as I head out of the kitchen. "Well, no, I'm not... Well, I mean, I am, but... Fuck! Would you stop walking away from me?!"

I'm in the process of stepping into my shoes, but I pause when Cal shouts at me. "I need a smoke," I explain, holding up the pack that I swiped off the side table on my way to the door.

"Come to the backyard," Cal instructs. He walks back toward the kitchen, clearly expecting me to follow him.

And I do. The years apart did nothing to diminish my obedience to him, it would seem.

Theo has a wooden deck in his backyard too, but this one is closer to the ground and isn't covered. There's a privacy wall on either side, and when Cal holds out his hand for a cigarette I understand why he wanted to go the backyard.

No one from his house will see him smoking here.

I hand him the pack of cigarettes and he passes one to me. After placing one between his lips, he takes Theo's lighter out of the pack and moves it toward me to light my smoke. It's a simple gesture, but there's an intimacy attached to it that stirs up the longing in my heart. I breathe in deeply, and hope I can pass it off as just the required action for smoking, when in reality it's Cal's closeness that causes it.

He lights his own cigarette and then observes the lighter in his hand. "You took Theo's lighter?"

I narrow my eyes at the lighter. It's just a regular, black Bic. How did he know it was Theo's?

Cal notices my expression and holds the lighter closer to me. My eyes land on a T scratched into the black plastic.

"He labels his Bics?" I ask with an eye roll.

Cal smirks. "He got sick of me pocketing them and claiming they were mine."

I take the lighter from his hand and look at the engraved T. "He does a better job than you," I tease.

"What?" Cal asks, feigning shock. He places his cigarette between his lips and holds it there while he takes the Bic back from me. Simultaneously, he reaches into his pocket.

When he pulls his hand out again, my heart slows to a deep, drawn out thump.

Cal lays the Bic in his palm, next to the very Zippo I gave him for Christmas all those years ago. He looks down at the two lighters and shakes his head, as he reaches up to take the cigarette from his mouth. He exhales a breath of smoke. "You think his T looks better than my engraving job? No way! Look at this handiwork!"

He holds his hand with the lighters toward me and looks at me with a bemused grin. It disappears when he sees my expression and realizes the significance of the Zippo in his hand.

E+CJ
4EVR

The CJ is professionally engraved, while the remaining letters were added by a pocket knife in Cal's hand.

"You still have this?" My voice comes out in a whisper. I begin to reach for the old lighter, and Cal pulls his hand back protectively.

"Uhh," he mumbles, looking and sounding embarrassed now. He moves his hand back toward me to allow me to take it. "Yeah, I..." he starts, only to drift off when I take it from his hand. His hand closes tightly around the remaining Bic in his palm.

I turn the Zippo over in my hand, smiling at the way the scratched up surface feels against my skin. "We should have lit our smokes with this! I miss that weird, first drag that tastes like lighter fluid." I can almost taste it now as a wave of nostalgia runs through me along with the nicotine.

Cal takes a long drag of his cigarette and then shoves his hand with the Bic in his pocket. He seems restless. "It doesn't work," he explains, still sounding awkward. "I tried a new flint, and a new wick... The damn thing just won't hold a flame."

And yet, he kept it.

"You brought it out to show me?" I ask with a small smile, appreciating the gesture.

Cal slowly nods but then grimaces and shakes his head. "Not really... I put it in my pocket this morning out of habit. I like to have it with me..." His eyes are on the Zippo when he says it, but he raises them to look at me. "But I guess I don't need to do that anymore."

"Because it doesn't work?"

"It hasn't worked in years, Emy. I still carried the damn thing with me everywhere," he laughs softly, "I feel naked right now letting you hold it even..." His hand is still shoved in his pocket with Theo's lighter, as if he's trying to fool himself with a replacement.

"Oh." My heart melts at his confession, and I offer the sentimental piece of junk back to him.

Cal shakes his head. "It's okay, I don't need it anymore."

My melted heart turns back to ice. "Right... You have April now."

"Yeah," Cal says with a nod, "and I still hung onto that damn lighter. But now I don't need it anymore." He reaches for my hand and curls my fingers around the Zippo. "'Cause you're with me. I have you back again."

"Cal..." I step toward him to put my arms around him, and feel a weight lift off my shoulders when Cal returns my embrace.

When we step apart Cal smiles at me, and I smile back. He walks to a wooden Muskoka chair that sits low to the porch floor and retrieves a glass ashtray that's tucked underneath it. He butts out his cigarette and carries it toward me.

"Hey, so..." he begins, while I stub out my cigarette in the glass dish he's holding, "I know I said I don't need the Zippo, but... could I have it back?"

I grin at him and hold the broken lighter toward him. "I'll trade you for Theo's lighter. I sort of need one that actually works."

Cal laughs and digs the black Bic out of his pocket. He hands it back to me, and his eyebrows draw together like he's deep in thought

"What is it?" I ask.

"I'm still trying to piece together what you're doing in Theo's house. I mean, I know you heard me and April last night and left through the back door, but then what? You just decided to come visit Theo?"

"Ha. Not quite. I was..." I don't know why, but I can't bring myself to tell him that I had been planning to leave, especially now that he's shown me that broken, old Zippo. "Uh, Theo saw me struggling to light a cigarette and offered me a light."

"And from there you ended up sleeping in his house?"

I shrug. "Yeah, pretty much."

Cal scowls at me, watching me like he's waiting for me to say more. When I don't offer anything else to the story, he sighs and looks to the back door. "Well, alright, now that I've polluted my lungs, I think I am going to go for that jog. I'll set you up with the TV or something? April and Monster will probably be awake in an hour or two, but I should be back before then."

I follow him back into the house to go through the front door, since Theo's backyard is fenced off.

"Your fence hopping days are over, huh?" I tease while we walk to the sidewalk to get around the white picket fence separating the two properties.

Cal smirks and looks at the short, white fence that doesn't even reach his waist. "Not enough of a challenge to make it interesting," he comments with a light shrug.

"Not to mention you're not in a position where you need to steal money," I say with a teasing tone, but Cal doesn't seem to appreciate it.

His shoulders droop as we reach his front door.

"Ricky forgives you, you know," I tell him softly, feeling guilty for what was meant to be harmless teasing. When we had talked about Ricky and Marissa yesterday, our conversation had only really focused on Mr. Scott.

"For what?" Cal mumbles. He had been reaching for the the door handle, but now he drops his arm to his side.

"Stealing his wallet," I offer, thinking the answer is obvious.

Cal nods. "Right... Yeah, of course..."

He opens the door and gestures for me to go inside. He walks in after me and walks to the TV stand to pick up the remote control.

My eyes fall on the couch and a queasy feeling fills my stomach. There are a couple of chairs I could sit in, but I don't even want to be in the same room as that defiled piece of furniture. "Do you think the shower running will wake your family up?"

Cal shrugs. "You could use the shower in the downstairs bathroom if you want. I'm going to run upstairs to change into some shorts. I'll get you a towel?"

"Shorts?" I don't think I've ever seen Cal wear shorts.

Cal looks down at his jeans and then back at me. "I can't go jogging in jeans."

"When did you start jogging?"

"Sometime around when I quit doing lines," he answers with a small shrug. "The only high I get now is a runner's high." He points finger guns at me with a cheesy smile and then grimaces at his own lame joke. "Apparently I get off on dad jokes now, too..."

His running joke only earns him a blank stare from me, but I laugh out loud at his comment about dad jokes. "You're a dork. I should have known when your favourite books were fantasy and sci-fi."

"There's nothing more bad ass than dragons and spaceships, Emy," Cal says with a grin. "Bathroom's down the hall, past the staircase. You want me to bring your bag down for you?"

"Sure. Thanks Cal."

"No problem. I'll hang the towel on the doorknob and leave your stuff in the hall."

"You could just bring it into the bathroom," I tell him in a quiet voice with a coy smile. I run my fingers through my hair. "It's not like you haven't seen me naked before."

Cal shakes his head. "I'll leave it outside the door," he says again.

"Are you worried about getting too close to me when I don't have clothes on?" I tease him with a smirk.

Cal stares at me with no expression, then slowly walks toward me and lays his hand on my shoulder,

Unwillingly, I hold my breath, wondering what he's going to do next.

His strong hand gives my shoulder a gentle squeeze and his eyes study mine, before a soft smile tugs at his lips. "You still want to get breakfast later?"

I can't find words, so I nod instead.

"Great." His warm palm rests against my shoulder for another beat and then he pulls his hand back. He starts walking to the stairs, but then looks back at me again. "Hey Emy?"

"Yes?"

"Do not fuck with Theo. I mean it."

He disappears up the stairs before I have a chance to figure out what he means.