I don't dare to open my eyes. If I can just keep them closed, then I can pretend that it was all just a nightmare. It wasn't real. It didn't happen.

"Emilia... Emilia..."

A low voice keeps calling my name, but I don't want to answer. That will make it real. I can't handle it being real.

A large hand rests against my shoulder. I shrink back and whimper, and the hand immediately moves off of me again.

"Emilia!" The voice calls to me more urgently.

It slowly registers in my mind that the voice I'm hearing isn't Adam's, and that's when I remember that it was real. It already happened. It's already over, even though it keeps reoccurring in my nightmares like it's still taking place.

I slowly open my eyes to see a thick pair of jean-clad legs in front of me. I'm startled by the sight, and my body jerks into the low back of the couch.

You're on a couch, Emilia, but it's not that couch. You're okay.

The legs step away, giving me more space, and I force myself to look up the body into the concerned face of Theo.

"What do you want?" I try to snap at him.

Damn my voice for sounding small and frightened, when I had meant for it to sound angry.

Well, duh, you're not fucking okay, but there's nothing you can do about it now. It's over. He's not here. Pull yourself together.

"Bad dream?" Theo asks.

I glare at him as I sit up. I pull the soft blanket tightly around my shoulders. "No. I just don't like being woken up by a stranger."

"You were whimpering in your sleep before I woke you up," he points out, which earns him another glare. When I don't respond, he points to his phone which is laying on the couch, where my body had just been laying as well. "I need my phone. I got to go to work."

I pick up his phone and toss it at him.

Theo catches the cell and slides it into his pocket, but then continues to stand there looking at me.

"What?" I grumble up at him. "And isn't it Saturday?" I glance toward the window and notice that the sun is hardly starting to rise. "What time is it even?"

"A little after five. I work Saturdays sometimes," he answers.

"Gross." I close my eyes and let my head fall back against the couch. I wait to hear Theo's footsteps walking away, but the sound doesn't come. "Fuck, Theodore, what do you want?"

"You're shaking," he replies, bringing my attention to the trembling running through my bones.

"I'm cold," I lie. The warmest blanket in the world couldn't stop me from shaking right now. This is my new normal. I just need some time to fully wake up, some time to push down the memories, and then the shaking will come to an end until the next memory sets me off again.

"Open your eyes," Theo's voice comes out in a quiet command.

I crack them open to scowl at him, though I'm not sure why I'm listening to him. If his tone hadn't been so soft, I'd give him a piece of my mind, but something about his voice is comforting. I'd be a fool to push away what little comfort life offers me.

Theo smiles at me when my eyes settle on him, and the expression does something to ease my scowl. He takes a slow step toward the couch and then pauses, like he's waiting for me to react. When I don't, he lowers himself onto the couch next to me.

I didn't think life could surprise me any more than it already has, but nothing could have prepared me for the feeling of Theo's large arms gently wrapping around me.

My body is still shaking, but I don't feel an urge to shove him away. I lean into his solid body, and Theo takes it as an invitation to tighten his hold.

Initially, the strength of his arms begins to set off alarm bells, but instead of pulling away, I find myself hugging him back. The tremors in my body begin to subside.

I don't know why, but the mountain man and his solid embrace is comforting as hell, even though I hardly know him. Maybe it's because something about him reminds me of Adam. It's probably just the size of him, and the way he has that rough exterior but apparently a teddy bear heart.

Except... Adam betrayed me, in the cruelest form. He showed me his teddy bear heart, only to rip my heart from my chest with his dangerous bear claws.

The memory taints this brief moment of comfort I'm experiencing with Theo. My body turns stiff in his arms, and Theo immediately releases me.

"Sorry," he apologizes as he stands up from the couch, "You just looked like you could use a hug. I'm sorry for making you uncomfortable."

My shaking has stopped. He was right, a tight hug was exactly what I needed.

"I'm fine," I insist, while I once again tighten the blanket around me. It's not as comforting as Theo's arms, but it also isn't capable of turning on me later, which makes it the better choice. "Do you by any chance have an extra toothbrush?"

"Bathroom, bottom drawer on the right." He starts walking toward the kitchen. "I'm making myself some eggs. Do you want any?"

I don't feel hungry, but I know I should eat. It's not like I'll be able to fall back asleep after that nightmare anyway, and I'm sure Theo doesn't want to leave me alone in his house.

"Sure, I'll have one," I answer. I stand up from the couch and walk toward the bathroom Theo showed me to yesterday.

"I'll make you two," he answers as I move down the hallway.

What is with this family and trying to fatten me up?

----------

When I finish in the bathroom, I hear the front door open and close. I guess Theo decided not to make eggs after all. But as I walk down the hallway, I hear Cal's voice and realize it must have been him entering the house and not Theo leaving.

"April wants me to get rid of the mailbox!" he loudly exclaims once he finds Theo in the kitchen.

"Oh?" Theo replies, but he doesn't offer anything else to the conversation.

"Yeah, she said when Emy first came to the house and they talked, she called her Mrs. O'Malley. April said she was shocked and it took her a minute to figure out where Em had got the name from, but then she noticed her looking at the mailbox. And now, she wants me to get a new one!"

"So, get a new mailbox... ?" Theo offers.

"Really? Just like that?" Cal asks skeptically. "I can just... do that?"

Theo replies with a question of his own. It's something I'm beginning to notice he does often. "Why wouldn't you be able to, Cal?"

"Cause... Cause it's theirs," Cal answers, and I can hear the frustration in his voice.

"What do you mean, theirs?" Theo asks.

Cal sighs before he answers. He sounds irritated, now that Theo is requiring him to spell it out. "April and Emily... and Ben's. It's got their handprints, their initials, their last name!"

"No, it doesn't," Theo replies calmly.

"What?" Cal says next, sounding anything but calm.

"It has Ben's last name," Theo corrects, "O'Malley isn't April and Emily's last name anymore, Cal. That's your wife and your daughter. They took your last name. Get a mailbox with your name on it. You can't tell me you don't want to do that?"

"Of course I want to do it," Cal replies. I can't see him from my place in the hallway, but I know him enough to be sure that he's throwing his hands in the air as he speaks. "That mailbox has been taunting me for the better part of two fucking years!"

Theo laughs at Cal's dramatics. "So why are you here in a panic? April told you to get rid of it, so do it."

Cal's still not convinced. "But what if..."

"What if... ?" Theo presses.

"What if she changes her mind?" Cal snaps, reverting to the emotional state he's most comfortable with—anger. He always seemed to favour that emotion over feelings of uncertainty or inferiority. "What if she regrets telling me to replace it, or resents me for it? What if Monster does?"

"Cal..." Theo says his name and then pauses, "Are we still talking about the mailbox?"

"Fuck, Theo, I don't know!" Cal answers, starting to raise his voice more, "Everything's all jumbled in my fucking head right now! I'm happy about Emilia showing up here, I really am, but things were finally settling down again, after my last fuck up and... and..." His voice grows quiet toward the end of his rant, and I hear a steady thump, thump.

My nosey mind propels me forward, and I step closer to the kitchen to peer in at the two men. They're standing near the stove, and Theo has Cal in a one-armed embrace. There's another thump as his large hand pats his back.

"Cal, it's going to be okay," he assures, "Emilia finding you is a good thing. Yes, it's going to feel complicated for awhile, but you've got this, and we've got you."

Cal nods as he takes a step back from Theo. He seems more calm, but not completely convinced.

"April's not going to regret marrying you and she's not going to resent you," Theo continues. He glances at the stove and steps closer to it. He flips the eggs while he continues talking. "And Emily? Come on, Cal, she loved you long before April could even stand being in the same room as you." They both chuckle a little at his words. "She doesn't remember Ben, but even if she did, she would never resent you for stepping in as her father. How could anyone resent you for that?"

Cal is quiet while he takes in Theo's words.

I almost feel bad for once again eavesdropping on his personal conversations, but I don't feel bad enough to give them privacy.

"What if I fuck up again, Theo?" Cal asks in a quiet voice.

Theo turns the stove off and turns to look at him. "Don't."

Cal smirks. "That easy, huh?"

Theo shakes his head. "I didn't say it would be easy, I just told you not to do it. You need to go to a meeting, Cal. Today. I'll go with you."

Cal shakes his head, and Theo doesn't seem to like it.

"Cal," he says his name firmly.

Cal holds up a hand to stop him. "I'll go, Theo. I just meant that you don't have to come with me. I know you planned to work today after cutting your day short yesterday."

"That doesn't matter, Cal. I can—"

"No, really, man. I'm good to go on my own. I know I'm in here spouting off like I'm losing it, but it's not really that bad. I think I'm just worried about it getting bad, you know? But..."

He stops talking as he watches Theo put the eggs on two plates. "Oh shit, man, you have company? Why didn't you say anything?" He elbows Theo in the ribs and grins at him. "It's about time you got laid, old man, knew you'd..."

He starts to walk away from Theo as he speaks, and his voice drifts off when he sees me hovering in the entrance to the kitchen. He takes in the shirt I'm still wearing from last night and a dark expression settles over his features.

"What the fuck?!"