Chapter Ten

I thanked Ryden for that. Well atleast he's saying sorry. The words truly did hurtme even though they aren't true, it still stabs me in the chest the fact that there are people who thinks of me that way. Ni hindi nga nila kinlaro at nag-isip pa ng malalim tungkol sa video na iyon. Lalo na ang mga taga-LIS. They probably know where that place is at dahil nga sa desires and attraction nila towards Ryden, sa iba na rin ang pinapaniwalaan nila. They praise him dangerously, is he happy with it?

There was a ghost of smile that could be seen in his face. “Narinig ko nga pala ang nangyari kanina sa cafeteria. Dahil ba iyon sa issue tungkol kahapon?”

I sighed and nodded. “Hindi na kinaya ng pasensya ni Arin kaya ayon pinatulan. Actually, nariyan sila sa loob. Sini-settle ang pangyayari kanina.”

There was an obvious guilt in his eyes. Ngayon ko lang napansin na parang may nagbago sa pakikitungo ni Ryden ngayon. He used to be cold, careless, feelingero and rude but right now, all I could see is softness and gentleness the way he utters his words. Siguro ay dala na rin ito sa mga pangyayari. But I just didn't expect that he has this side of him. Iyong tipo ng tao na hindi nagpapakulo ng dugo ko.

Pagkatapos naming mag-usap ng ilang minuto ay bumalik kaming sabay patungo doon sa labas ng office ng guidance counselor. Ashton and Quinn was still there and having their animated conversation. Nang makarating kami sa kanilang kinaroroonan ay saka palang nila napansin ang aming presensya.

“Ryden, pare,” bati ni Ashton rito at bahagyang tinapik ang kaniyang braso. I raised my brows, he's back at it again. Hooded eyes. Tumango lang ito kay Ash.

“I heard about Aye and you's issue. Saan mo nga ba dinala ang pinsan ko kahapon, pre?”

“Ashton, sa tindahan lang naman iyon diyan sa malapit, ano ka ba.” Pinandilatan ko si Ash.

“I'm sorry about that. Umulan ng biglaan kaya't no choice ako kundi higitin siya patungo roon para mamasilong.”

“Hmm, bakit mo naman hinigit at tinakpan mo pa ng jacket, napaka-protective mo tingnan, pre.” Ash smirked.

“I just think that she's my responsibility dahil kasama ko siya gumawa ng performance task namin kahapon sa library. It would be rude if I left her there, walang payong.”

“Hmm, okay.” Ashton shrugged at tumahimik na. Ilang segundo pa man ay nagsalita na naman ulit siya. “Sure ka ba na iyon lang ang eksplenasyon mo?”

Ryden kinda knotted his brows. “Ano ba dapat?”

“Wala.”

Ewan ko kung anong nakain ni Ash at kung ano-ano pang explanation ang hinahanap kay Ryden. Iyon lang rin naman yata kasi iyon lang din ang masasabi kong rason bakit niya ako pinrotektahan kahapon sa ulan gamit ang jacket niya. Same goes when why I let him rode to our car. I felt like he's my responsibility kasi ako ang kasama niya kahapon galing sa library. And we're not upto something kadiri, pauwi na nga kami nun, eh.

Natapos ang araw na iyon na sobrang stressful. Humupa na ang mga paggo-gossip nila about sa amin ni Ryden probably they got scared the way Arin acted lately. Sobrang bangis niyang tignan na animo'y handa nang kakain ng tao. Even though I don't support violence to be solution of everything, I still thanks Arin because somehow, she made the gossips stop. Sana ay wala nang kasunod nito kasi baka ako na rin ang matulad kay Arin. Though, I don't think Arin regret that she attacked Trisha. Pagbalik tuloy sa classroom ay sobrang tahimik ng dalawa. And that's unusual.

Nang mag-gabi na ay in-open ko ang aking Bookstagram. It has been days nang huli akong mag-upload rito. It was a good thing that I didn't reveal my real identity in my Bookstagram. Only my books are being seen at wala nang iba. I posted there a recommendation about ‘he fell first and he fell harder’ romance trope. Napansin ko kasi na marami na'kong nabasang magagandang books tungkol roon and I feel like recommending to some.

Kasunod kong binuksan ay ang twitter. Hindi iyon private account sadyang wala lang talaga akong masyadong posts roon dahil hindi ko naman ito nakahiligan. I prefer being on Instagram or should I say, my Bookstagram.

Halos manginig ang aking lalamunan nang makitang maraming naka-mention sa pangalan ko roon and I know that this is about the issue of me and Ryden. I scrolled down the notifications until something caught my eye.

‘@ryden_caleb21 started following you.’

Paano niya naman nahanap ang twitter ko?! Napakagat ako sa aking labi. I didn't expect him to find me account that fast! Hindi naman ito naka-link doon sa Facebook profile ko, ah.

But then I let that slide. Pinindot ko nalang ang profile niya at hindi na nagulat nang makitang kulay plain black lang ang kaniyang header at ang kaniyang icon ay picture niya na close-up at naka-sideview. His hair was messy here. He has thousand of followers and five followings. Madamot naman pala ito sa follow niya! And then, I decided to scroll down and that's when I almost gasp about what I've seen.

ryd @ryden_caleb21:
Good eve, I just want to say something about  the spreading video about yesterday. I have to clarify things to clear this all up. Yes, it was me. However, it's not like what you think. That time was raining so I and that girl had to go run towards the nearest store to wait until the rain stops+

I don't see any s3xual issues about what happened tommorow just like on what you guys have been thinking. I don't even have any intimate relationship with the girl. She's just my classmate and a friend. So I hope you stop.+

Also, please stop bothering her and mentioning her account towards this absurd issue you make. She's not the way you think she is. I hope you realize all the bad things you've done to us especially to her because I saw a lot of you attacking her name. Stop doing that, you forgot the proper nettiquette.+

I deeply apologize towards her, her family and to her friends for all the mess. Thank you.

My world stopped a bit. I read his tweet for multiple times already and I don't know how to react. He turned off the comment section which is why I couldn't see any replies of the posts but from second to second, dumadami ang retweets at likes nito. He really is popular not just in this town but also here in twitter, effortlessly. I don't know what makes him extra popular other than being ‘hot’?

Tinantanan ko na ang kaniyang tweet at nag-tipa kaagad ng DM para sa kaniya. Wews, hindi ko nga alam kung naka-online ba siya dito sa twitter ngayon eh.

Aye:
Hi Ryden, good eve! thank u a lot for making the statement. Buti naman, makakahinga na'ko ng maluwag ahahaha lol

Sa di inaasahan, wala pa ngang isang minuto ang nakalipas ay nakatipa rin siya kaagad ng reply.

Ryd:
I just felt like I should make one. ayokong palakihin pa 'to.

btw, do u really feel okay now?

Nang mabasa ang pangalawang message niya'y awtomatikong napahinga ako ng malalim. I grinned to myself, bakit naman ako magre-react ng kung ano? Tinatanong niya lang naman kung okay na'ko siyempre he knew that I was feeling troubled because of the issue!

Aye:
Oo naman, sana lang bukas wala na silang iti-tweet :))

Ryd:
Don't worry, I already reported their accounts.

Tumaas ang kilay ko. Ang dami nun, ah.  Inisa-isa niya?

Magtitipa pa sana ako ng mensahe nang matigil ako dahil sa biglang kalabog. Nagmula ito sa labas ng kwarto o kabilang kwarto, I'm not sure. Napahawak ako sa aking dibdib nang makarinig ako ng mga singhalan. It was obviously from my parents at nagsasagutan sila.

Kaya naman ay nilapag ko muna ang aking cellphone sa kama at dahan-dahanng tinahak ang pintuan. I know I should step back and wouldn't listen to their conversation but I am scared. Paano kung magkakasakitan sila ng pisikalan? Of course, I wouldn't let that slide.

“Don’t tell me that you’re happy now, dahil narito na naman siya, ha?”

Kaba kaagad ang naramdaman ko nang makita ko sina Mommy and Daddy na nagtatalo. I realized that they are arguing at the living room at mula rito sa kinatatayuan ko'y kitang-kita ko sila. Dad looks like a mess. Ang buhok niya'y magulo and he's necktie was a bit loose. Both of them was still wearing their corporate attire at siguro'y galing pa sila sa opisina o sa kotse ay nag-aaway na. 

“What are you talking about? What kind of bullshit is that? Bakit naman ako matutuwa ha, you think? I don’t care about them anymore, Harriette!”

I can sense that Daddy might lose his temper anytime now. Kitang-kita ko kung paano gumagalaw ang kaniyang panga habang ang mga mata'y nandidilim kay Mommy. Kahit na sa ganoon, alam kong hindi niya magagawang saktan si Mommy. Maraming beses ko na silang nakitang ganito but it was just a small fight because they want to hide it from me. Alam ko naman iyon. Hindi ko pa rin alam kung bakit sila nag-aaway.

“Baka nga kunwaring trabaho lamang iyang inaatupag mo pero sa totoo lang, hinahanap mo talaga siya? Kaya ba unti-unti ka nang nawawalan ng gana sa pamilyang ito?”

Sino bang pinag-uusapan nila?

“What? Harriette, please ‘wag kang mag-isip ng ganyan. I spend my time working, merely working! Wala akong pakialam kung nasaan man ang mag-asawang iyon, mapadpad man sila dito o hindi. For Pete's sake, that was years ago! Kahit tanungin mo pa si Dave o si Alexander!”

“Why would I even ask them? Dave? Never!”

Dad sighed. “Then if you don't trust them, then trust me. Hindi ko alam kung anong nasa isip mo ngayon but please, whatever you're thinking negatively, that's not true. Hindi ko alam bakit ka nagko-conclude ng ganiyan, Harriette.”

“Then why do always acts like you're affected? Kahit isang mention ko lang sa pangalan niya sa harapan mo'y nagbabago na agad ang timpla mo. Now tell me, Chester, was it really over for you? Because I doubt it.”

Napalunok na lamang ako. I don't want to hear any further. Base sa naiintindihan ko ay this has to do something with their past which is I don't know about. My parents never tell me how they met. Tanging sagot lang nila pareho ay they got married because they decided to.

Huli na nang tatakbo sana ako pabalik sa kwarto ko, pero nahagip agad ako ng paningin ni Mommy, kitang-kita sa kaniyang mukha ang pagkagulat nang makita ako. Wala na akong choice, nagpakita na lamang ako sa kanila at sabay baba sa hagdan.

“Yej, ikaw p-pala. U-Uh, nag-uusap lang kami ng Daddy mo, pasensya kana…”

Hindi ko magawang makasagot sa sinabi ni Mommy. Biglang nag-iba ang ihip ng hangin. Halatang may awkwardness na sa atmosphere namin. Si Daddy ay humalukipkip lamang sa isang tabi habang si Mommy ay agad-agad na tumungo sa dining area at naghanda ng mga kubyertos para sa hapunan.

Hindi ako nakaimik. I know it wasn't just a simple talk. May usap bang nagsisigawan eh nasa harapan mo lang naman ang kinakausap mo. Napakagat na lamang ako sa aking labi. It was hell to witness your parents fighting and knowing that you couldn't do anything about it kasi anak ka lang. That's their life so they should fix it, iyan ang in-orient sa akin.

“I'm sorry, anak. You have to witness that,” Dad was just closer to me kaya rinig na rinig ko ang kaniyang sinabi na halos ibulong na.

I swallowed hard. “I hope you wouldn't hurt mom, dad. Hindi ko kakayanin makikita siyang umiiyak dahil sa'yo.”

Kitang-kita ko kung paano siya napayuko. My parents were not sweet towards each other if I'd compare it to the other parents. They were like ‘mag-asawa lang’ as if they only stayed in their marriage dahil sa akin. And it was happy and sad at the same time. Knowing that I'm one of their reason why they are respecting each other not to leave in  their lack-of-affection marriage.

“I won't let your mom, cry, Aye. Don't worry, we will fix this later.” He assured me.

That night, we had our dinner with an awkward atmosphere. Hindi umiimik ang dalawa and I think it's better that way than exchanging hurtful words. Kalma lang naman kaming kumain nang hapunan hanggang sa matapos ito'y bumalik na'ko sa kwarto. Oh, I remember I was having a chat with Ryden.

Ryd:
btw, are you done reviewing?

Halos mapamura ako sa lahat ng sulok ng aking kwarto nang mabasa ang huli ng chat. Review? para saan naman?

Aye:
ha? bakit magrereview?

Ryd:
two lessons ang isu-summative bukas sa ELS. 40 items each.

What the hell. Why the hell did I even forgot about it? Wala ako sa mood mag-review! I wanna sleep early and forget what happened just a while ago!

Ryd:
so, nag-review ka na ba?

Aye:
hindi pa eh, I forgot :<

Nakakahiya ka, Aye.

Ryd:
I'll send the pointers, Aye. Goodluck sa'tin bukas sa summative.

Ilang buntong-hininga na yata ang ginawa ko. Baka isipin pa ng lalaking ito na pinapabayaan ko na ang pag-aaral ko dahil nakalimutan ko man lang na may summative bukas sa ELS! Kaya naman nang ma-send niya na sa'kin ang pointers, kahit labag sa aking kalooban ay binasa ko ito ng paulit-ulit. Madali lang naman intindihin, iyon nga lang, nakakatamad. Good thing, Ryden's handwriting isn't messy.

Natapos akong mag-review nang mga alas-onse na sa gabi. I then decided to open my twitter because something at the back of my mind pushes me to.

Ryd:
Review well and goodnight. See u tomorrow :)

It was his last message that was sent an hour ago and I wasn't able to reply because I took away from me so that I wouldn't be distracted.

Aye:
goodnight din. Salamat sa pointers!