Friday|

I picked up my broom and dustpan, and swept the dust off the floor, which also happened to be my study table for now. When was I going to get a new desk? Probably not in the near future.

It's funny how something can be broken in an instant, just like that. And just as soon as we find the courage to piece it back together, it shatters again.

It happened again Wednesday night.

Maybe money was the root of all evil, maybe if it didn't exist we would all be happy. That is a lie, I know full well, but I wish so much to put the blame on it; a commodity, an item, a concept. And not someone I was supposed to love unconditionally.

"Just give it to me! For goodness sake Pauline!"

"Please, Kylar needs this for her school fees!"

"You've used this excuse ten thousand times, do you think I don't know you use it to gamble?"

"Not like you're using it for anything better! All you do is drink all day, at least I have a day job! This money's mine!"

I climbed into my bed and pulled the covers over my ears, silently humming a lullaby to myself as the fight unfurled. Then, the sound of wood crashing against concrete resonated within my skull, and I was shocked out of my stupor.

The familiar feeling of intense terror gripped my heart; I covered my mouth to prevent a scream from escaping. My eyes may have numbed themselves and learnt how to keep the tears in, but my soul was crying.

I prayed a desperate prayer in my heart, before opening the door, hiding amongst the shadows of my living room. I barely made out the figure of my father slipping out of the house, and the image of my mother sitting on the ground, forlorn, glassy eyes staring at the wrecked study table before her.

Thank goodness no one was hurt; relief washed over me like summer rain.

Even so, it was not enough to wash away the pain in my heart, the throbbing, knawing feeling that came with the knowledge that this would happen again. I was hapless; nothing I did would change anything.

I stepped carefully around the wreckage, and pressed my face against my mother's. Tears streamed down her sallow cheeks, trickling down her neck.

"It's okay Mom, everything will be okay."

Those words left my lips before I could even give an afterthought; it dawned on me that I had been telling my mother this lie since I could talk. She nodded, eyes still lost in murky depths. If only she could give me some reassurance.

I picked up the broom and dustpan and swept the broken wood shards off the floor, which was going to be my study table for however long.