Ibrahim

I CAN'T DO this i said to myself several time feeling uneasy and frustrated,I stood up from the bed glancing at the very love of my life sleeping peacefully,I smiled touching her face gently thinking about how far we have gone

I never for once imagine myself falling in love talkless of falling in love with the very lady I despised most,I groan taking my hand off her,I sat beside the bed thinking about how this felt like I'm betraying her,I know she's not happy seeing me getting married to another woman

Heck!!!

No woman who genuinely loves her husband will be happy seeing her husband getting married to another woman but I had no choice,I have to protect her and indirectly protect the only thing my family has which is the company,I can't be selfish

I started running my hands over my hair thinking about the ways I can actually end this meaningless marriage but nothing came into my mind,it felt like my mind is void of any form of brilliant ideas

"Ibrahim"I heard Aishah hoarse voice call

"Yes"I answered turning around to give her my full attention

"What's wrong?"she asked

"Nothing,I'm fine"I lied

"You look like someone in deep thought"she says seeing through my facade

Or was I too obvious

"Seriously I'm fine,let's go back to bed before morning comes"I said praying she just let it be,I lay beside her drawing her closer sniffing her scent and finally sighing in satisfaction

"Are you sure?"she asked again like she didn't believe me

"Let's sleep"I said irritatedly shutting her up

Not long enough I heard her breath evenly showing she had fell asleep

I couldn't sleep,I was so deep in meaningless thoughts sighing time to time before I heard the first call of prayer

I left Aishah's room going back into my room,I lay on bed trying to get a sleep before the D day but I couldn't have an ounce of sleep

I tossed and tossed till the second call of prayer was made before I stood up having my salat

I took my bath wearing my white kaftan that was gifted to me by my dad,he personally asked me to wear it for the wedding

I stood facing the big mirror in my room looking at the kaftan when the door suddenly opened revealing Aishah,she smiled taking my breath away and I wish we could get married again,I wished we could start all over and this wedding should have been between us not any other lady

She came close standing in front of me helping me with my buttons and I couldn't help but admire her,my eyes landed on her belly and I imagine us just three of us me her and the baby living happily together in the house but we all know most of our wishes never come true

"You look nice"she said dusting an imaginary dirt from my white kaftan while all I see is how beautiful she is and how this moment is one of the best thing I could ever wish for

"I know you're not happy"I found myself whispering feeling a throbbing pain in my heart

"What choice do I have?"she said looking up at me smiling,I wanted to hug her whispering in her ear that everything is fine,I kicked against it and lean giving her a simple kiss in the lips

"Can you promise me something?"I asked

"What?"she asked with her face looking confusing

"Promise me you will always understand,you will always trust me and every decision I make,and most importantly stay clear from Halimat,I know it's not easy sharing thesame house with her,but you have to please don't let her get to you"I said praying earnestly she follows what I say

"This is too much"she said chuckling dryly like she doesn't like what I said,neither do I like what's going on "I will try my best"

"Not your best Aishah,I want a promise from you,I promise you this won't go on forever"I say trying to believe myself too, trying to promise myself to make this promises come true

"Yes,I promise to trust you in every decision you make"she said smiling and I felt relieved

"I love you"I found myself pouring out my inner feeling

"I love you"she repeated,I look into her eyes and all I could see is honesty,my mind calm down sure enough she reciprocate the feelings I had for her

She didn't left immediately but helped me get ready,my heart yearn more for her,for her selflessness and I couldn't help but try to let her know how much she means to me by showering her with lots of loves and comments

I left the house earlier than her because I needed to be present for the wedding Niqqah,I climbed into the passenger seat of my car as Habeeb turned to look at me pitifully,he was the best man of the day because Abubakar is currently out of the city and he knew everything that's going on

"Don't give me that look please it makes me look more pathetic"I said groaning shoving him away

"Love sucks right?"he said shaking his head absentmindedly while I only gulped looking away in the window

He ignited the car engine roaring the car to life as he drive out of the compound

Love sucks right

I found myself thinking about what Habeeb said and I couldn't help but agree to it,I wondered how I fell for Aishah and how deep it has gotten

Love just happens

I concluded drifting my mind back to the problem I'm currently in

"How sure am I that Halimat won't try hurting Aishah when they live in thesame roof and you know I'm not always around?"I asked my friend

"Well I can't say but I pray she doesn't,what plans have you sketched out so far?"

"Non"I said rubbing my face tiredly feeling like punching anything available

"Don't get yourself riled up,you will surely come up with a plan soon I believe"he said with determination

"I hope"I muttered slowly drifting back to silence

The car stopped at the front of the mosque and I felt like running away but I knew better,I rather face my problems than to run away from them

I stepped out of the car walking slowly to the mosque while Habeeb gave me an encouraging smile which I found hard to return

I met my male families already sat at the mosque waiting for me,Habeeb and I joined them and soon enough in no less than thirty minutes the Niqqah was done pronouncing Halimat as my legal wife

A year ago if something like this would have happened I would have found myself the happiest man on earth but no! I felt no happiness,I felt aggravated and disappointed in my own self for not being able to keep my promise as a man

We left the Mosque and I went with Habeeb to the hotel we lodge changing my wear to something else for the wedding reception

"I can't believe my friend already have two wives while I haven't have one yet"Habeeb said pissing me up

"Are you trying to know if I'm angry or not?"I asked giving him a stink eye while he raise up his hand in surrender

"I forgot you're in no good mood"he said and I roll my eyes getting ready for a reception I don't want, thinking back in time I realized the feelings I had now was thesame feelings I had when I was getting married to Aishah

"Let's go"I said shaking my head to clear my thoughts

I met with Halimat who looks so happy and well dressed with heavy make flaunting her beauty in her wedding attire,I shook my head angrily when I discovered we were both dressed in peach

We took thesame car with an assigned driver while Habeeb and her bestlady who I don't care to know about left in thesame car too

"You look nice"she said checking me out while I frown my face harder,she knew I was ignoring her and decided on roaming my body with her filthy hands

"Get your hands of me"I said harshly with lower voice

"Oh I was just thinking about our honeymoon"she said smiling

"You wish"I murmured facing the other side

***************

The occasion was boring me to death I couldn't wait to get this over with and get out of this suffocating dress,my eyes involuntary landed on smiling Aishah and I found myself smiling unconsciously when Halimat thinks it was the right time to wipe away the smile from my face

"You invited her to my wedding?"she asked in an unbelievable voice while I roll my eyes

"She has the right to attend her husband's wedding"I replied nonchalantly while she scoffed

"She won't be for long"

"Don't get your hopes too high"I replied tuning her out

*********

The wedding came to an end and I have never been so grateful in my life,my dad wished to see me and I excused myself from Halimat after taking loads of pictures with her, Aishah and her,my family and hers with some close friends

"You called for me"I say as soon as my father and I were at a secluded area

"How are you feeling?"he asked and I felt like rolling my eyes,he was definitely asking a question he knows the answer to more than when he is asked to spell his name

"What do you expect?"I say shrugging,I don't want to piss the both of us up

"I know it's not easy and Aishah have been a great help in taming you down but you have to know Halimat is important to us,is important to this family"

"Yeah I know how Halimat is important to you and the rest"I replied with my jaw clenching

"Ibrahim you have to stop being bitter,you will learn to love Halimat back the way you grew to love Aishah and also you know the family all loves Halimat, Halimat is an important figure"my dad said and my anger flared

"I don't understand dad,I thought you like Aishah and that was the reason you made me marry her"I say and he smiled

"I was just eager to get you married"he says nonchalantly and I felt like punching him

"I am so disappointed in you and I'm sure your dead childhood friend is disappointed in you too,how can you use someone like that"I said shaking my head as I walk away

"Ibrahim come back her I'm not done with you!"he yelled

"I'm not having any of those talks with you anymore"I said walking away

I called Habeeb and soon enough he came with a car and I climbed in

"Where do you want to go?"he asked

"Your place,I need to calm down"I said looking outside while he ignited the car engines to life speeding away

I lean my head on the car seat, thinking about everything that just happened and I remembered the talk I had with Aishah's dad before he dad

"Ok what do you feel about her?"he asked with his voice visibly low that I have to strain my ear to hear what he said

"I do care about her it started awhile ago at first I got angry with whatever she does,how close she is to my friend,the truth sir is I am jealous of seeing her with someone else maybe it's because we are married and I care about her a lot"I confessed

"Should I tell you something you need to know"

"Yes"

"Ok"

"I'm not telling you this because she's my daughter, you're in love Ibrahim"

"Am in love?"I asked with shock evident in my face

"Yes you're and it seems you don't know how to go about it"

"Tell me what to do"I say with determination

"You just have to treat her right"he said and coughed adjusting his position in the bed "promise me one thing"

"What sir?"I asked leaning closer

"That you will take care of Aishah,you will always be there for her and never be the cause of her pain,you will love her till death do you parts"

"This is much"I said chuckling

"Can you?"he asked and I remain quiet for awhile thinking

"Yes,I promise"I say with determination and he smiled

"I know I will be dying soon and won't be there for my daughter the way I want to,I'm trusting her in your hands,I know you're a good man"he said and close his eyes while I remain quiet thinking about the short discussion we just had

Aishah is my responsibility,she's someone I should protect,I smiled knowingly thinking that no situation that can ever arise that will make me protect her

What a pathetic fool I was