Ever seen a baby Gazelle minutes after it's born? It attempts to stand on its never-used legs, and tumbles. It tries to jump, and tumbles. It falls onto its knees and crawls around on the ground, until it can get up. It's pretty damn cute.

This was not cute.

It started with a knock on the door. Room service was fast, I thought happily, still starving.

"Just bring it in and put it on the bed, thanks." I called out and waited to give them enough time to leave before emerging. I climbed out of the pool and shook the excess water off my hair, I suspected that the result looked a little like She-Ra jungle woman.

I stepped into the room and froze.

"Dimitri!" it came out as a shriek, thank God he wasn't looking at me. Hey, what was he looking at that was making him smile so much?

"...then the hard, pulsing shaft of his manhood sought out her most intimate part. The glistening pearl of her womanhood, moistened by the fiery furnace of unbridled passion. He impaled her on his- "

I could feel the smoldering heat rush through my body and reach boiling point.

"OK. Stop. You can... enough!" I burst out laughing. This fake, strange maniacal laugh. "Besides, it's... it's not even my book." More fake, weird laughter that disturbed me a little.

"Really?" he asked. Suddenly I saw little pinky-blue dancing dots of light playing on his shirt, hands and on the book. Dimitri noticed them too and looked at his hand.

Oh God, I knew I hated sequins for a reason. My boobs were basically shining on him. Could it get any worse? Yes it could, his eyes slowly looked up at me from the book and that was my cue to grab the nearest folded towel.

Damn, a fucking hand towel! I had to choose; cover the boobs, or cover the bottom half. Bottom half it was. I tried to wrap the towel around me but it didn't fit and fell to the ground. I went after it, bending to pick it up, only to feel the bikini bottom being eaten by one of my bum cheeks. I gave another shriek and shot up, maneuvering my ass away from his field of vision. Of course, the floor was wet and I fell onto my hands and knees.

"Fuck!" I heard myself pant as I crawled across the floor in the most undignified moment of my life. The floor was slippery and every now and then my knee would shoot out to the side.

I finally managed to make it to the bed and launched myself onto it, like a torpedo through the air. I did it with such force, that I felt my entire body flying through the air. It collided with the bed in an almighty collision.

I landed on my face and bounced a few times until the bed finally came to a stop, I reached for the duvet and rolled. I rolled as fast as I could until just my head was popping out of the duvet.

I lay there and looked up at Dimitri, vaguely aware that I couldn't move my arms, they had been wrapped so tightly against my body. I tried to act as casual as I possibly could.

"Dimitri." I smiled up at him through a crack in the wild hair obscuring my face. "What brings you here?"

Dimitri looked down at me and a smile spread across his face. It seemed to keep stretching, ear-to-ear until I was sure he couldn't smile anymore. I closed my eyes in sheer embarrassment, how was it possible to embarrass myself any more in front of him. But it was possible...

"You left these in the car, I thought I would return them. I tried to call you." He held his hand out revealing the two tiny sachets of sun cream that had been bestowed upon me by Flight and Travel Centre *terms and conditions apply. I had gone through all that for two tiny tester sachets of cream?

He was still smiling. The smile radiated in his eyes as he kept his hand outstretched, waiting for me to take the cream. I tried to move my arms. No luck. I tried again. Still nothing. They didn't budge. I was totally stuck. I tried to move my body and swing my legs off the bed at least so I could start trying to extricate myself from the anaconda-like grip of the duvet.

Nothing.

"You need some help?" He asked reaching towards me.

"No! No! I'm perfectly fine."

"Jane, unless you have a large knife in one of your hands and can cut yourself free, I think you're pretty stuck."

"Well it's a lucky thing I do then... " I paused. "OK. I don't."

Dimitri gave a small and ever-so-sexy chuckle as he bent down and wrapped his arms around me. This was the most embarrassing thing that had ever happened to me in my life. He fastened his arms around me and I had visions of him trying to lift me off the bed, but realizing that he was lifting a whale, and then crashing down himself. I closed my eyes waiting for the inevitable. Only it didn't come. Instead, I felt weightless as I was being lifted off the bed and placed gently on the floor. Not just that, but I was standing right in front of Dimitri. Face to face.

Our eyes locked and a weird moment descended on us like a mist. Silence infused with a strange humming awkwardness that clung to me and sent shivers through me.

The shivers made a u-turn and ran back up my spine as he pulled my large bushy mane from in front of my face and his fingers grazed my cheek. Next I felt his fingers on my neck as he started pulling the duvet down and loosen it. He gently turned me, like we were dancing, and the first layer was released. I did a full 360 until I was back facing him. He gave me a small semi smile and then turned me again, and again until I felt the duvet completely loosen around me and finally fall to the floor.

I was floating in a moment of absolute bliss as I stood face to face with the world's most attractive man. But the bubble was burst in the worst imaginable way as I watched his eyes drift from mine, to my lips and then down. I saw a look flash across his face, it seemed to be a look of shock and then his eyes locked onto something else.

I glanced down and that was the start of my demise. If I thought that this moment couldn't get any worse – this was it. In all the rolling, my bikini top had done the most appalling thing. The fervent roll had caused one cup to almost wedge itself under one of my armpits, completely exposing my one breast, and the other one was well on it's way to bursting out of the cup that was squashed into the center.

I gasped and immediately clasped my hands over my exposed breast. And that was me. I ran into the bathroom and slammed the door behind me. I fell against it out of breath from the mini sprint while I adjusted the cups.

I pushed my ear to the door and could hear that Dimitri was still there, shuffling around.

"Um.. you can leave the cream on the bed. Thanks for bringing it. Bye," the words fired out of my mouth like bullets. I was mortified and never wanted to see Dimitri again in my entire life.

I heard some more shuffling and it sounded like he had come all the way up to the door. I pressed my ear even harder and could almost make out the sound of his breathing.

"Was there something else?" I asked cheerfully.

"Yes. As a matter of fact. I was wondering if you'd changed your mind about Greek food?"

"No. Still don't like it."

"So you wouldn't want to come out with me and my group for a meal this evening?"

"No thanks. Thanks for asking though."

There was a pause. I could still hear him at the door.

"Anything else?" I asked.

" Yes. You should really wear your hair down more often," he said.

I heard my hotel door close. He was finally gone. It took me a few moments to pluck up the courage to step out, and when I did, he'd put my duvet back onto my bed, perfectly. The two sachets of cream sat in the middle of it positioned next to each other, as if he had taken a ruler and made sure that they were in perfect line. I reached up and touched my wild mop of hair.

"You should really wear your hair down like that more often."

What the hell did that mean? Was he poking fun at me and my tremendously unruly hair and my failed attempt to tame it?

Or did he really mean it?