"The advantage of growing up with siblings is that you become very good at fractions." – Robert Brault

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My big brother, Benjiro Yamaoka, is 6 years older than me, so by the time I entered primary school, he was super giant and tall. By the time I entered middle school, he was already an adult, busy with school, club activities and futuristic things, such as "cariia", "path", "modern econamic". 

I usually overheard the conversations between parents and big brother. Back then, what they spoke about was a whole mysterious new world for me, about "terrarist", "Ameerica", and "Braziilia", studies in "Asteroids citi". Even Touma, the loud and naughty scaredy-cat at home, sat still and listened with all his might as if he understood the whole grand universal idea about what was actually going on. However, we had jointly agreed that what they talked about is the ultimate euphoria, like the Hidden Leaf Village, Greed Island or the Mock Town or, actually the country of Xing. 

Every big brother is the hero to their younger siblings. For the longest time, Benjiro-onii-chan remained the hero I and Touma admired. Not only he's best at studies in his class, he's a devout follower at the church we attended masses every Sunday. Big brother's level-headed, clever and dependable in all aspects that we, kids, knew about. 

Touma's a different story. Being the youngest kid in the family, he thought he was the favorite child. Obviously, that'd be true for most families. Mom was strict and dad was always carefree the way he was, so Touma rigorously fought for attention. Plus, the fact that he's only 2 years younger than me also one way or another lessened his "being the youngest child" power. Touma had been a problematic child since birth, being loud, talkative, and being way aggressive in his kindergarten. 

"You're a young man now, Touma, so let's teach you act like one" my dad told him the dinner before his primary school started. And obviously, my big brother also had "classified" study sessions with Touma after dinner, teaching him how to "act like a young man". 

In primary school, Touma learned to play my dad's old guitar. At first, it was to grab the attention of mom and dad, but then he started liking music. And since then, attention of other people carried him away to other lands. Touma grew up to be a young talent in town. 

I always felt blessed having siblings. Especially after knowing some of my classmates didn't have one, so I took pride in telling stories about my brothers. I loved them dearly. My big brother tutored me whenever I had study problems, and I could play childish games with Touma. Without musical talents like Touma, or exceling at studies like big brother, I was still happy everyday. 

Those days never once failed to make me smile stupidly. 

After that, things changed. 

Mom and dad got divorced. 

They fought over who's got to keep the house, the lands and properties. 

They fought over who's got to take which kids. 

My mom got to take care of big brother and Touma, whereas I followed my dad. 

My mom kept the house and continued to live in the city, my dad used all his money to build a spacious house next to his farms in the suburbs. And he wedded with a woman who's pregnant at the time, another Yamaoka-san, but not my mom. 

After that, I don't really have a good recollection of any big family gathering. Things always got all blurry and cloudy in the memory over time. 

I still saw my big brother and Touma occasionally. From time to time, mom passed by my school and walked me home, asked me if I'd been eating properly, or how study was going, although she got busier at the shop. And sometimes, I passed by Touma's school to walk him home too, but he had grown much taller than me, and didn't seem to want his sister to walk him home like a childish kindergartener. And big brother's busy with his new university, so he no longer tutored me any lessons. 

During those years in schools, I got myself busy with everything too. I would study as hard as I could, draw anything from the way to schools and back, play basketball with new friends, and at night, while having dinner alone in my room, I would look at the night sky out the window. With the world downstairs, the same TV news reporter's voice, cheerful laughter, my dad's funny stories, I would look up the sky, wondering what my mom's making for dinner, whether big brother has come home, and whether Touma would feel scared sleeping alone tonight. 

By the time I entered university in Starry City to study arts, my big brother was working as a senior architect  in a big company in Aster city, and Touma was a second-year high schooler, having his debut in a music band. 

Despite all the smart phones and internet, I felt like the distance between us, children of Yamaoka, had become utterly unreachable, even by a phone call. 

Still, my mom's a tailor in town. Sometimes, she commutes to my little apartment in Starry City and makes me some stewed chicken. My mom, who didn't bother changing her last name after the divorce, sometimes calls and asks how my day has been.