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A Lying Witch and a Warden Part 1


[Open on a witch with green hair and a staff backflipping onto a cliff. She glares up at a large purple snake.]

Gildersnake: Foolish child! I could swallow you whole! [Hisses.]

Azura:Do not underestimate me, Gildersnake, for I am the Good Witch Azura, warrior of peace! [Poses as wind blows her hair before dropping into a battle stance and holding her staff like a bazooka.] Now eat this, sucka! [Fires off staff.]

Gildersnake: [While being shot.] No! My only weakness: dying! [Collapses.]
[Cuts to a doll of Azura and a green snake being held.]

Luz: And that's the end.

Camila: The end of what?

Luz: My book report. [The snake hisses and bites the doll.] I think I knocked it out of the park.

Loki: You really do.

Principal Hal :Loki stop talking. Your book report is why you're in here.

[He gestures to the door, through which two students can be seen outside running by screaming, snakes biting their heads. Loki laughs. ]

Luz: Oh. That's where the backup snakes were.

Camila: And what were you going to do with this? [Holds up several firecrackers tied together.]

Luz: That was for the Act Three closer.

Camila :Mija, I love your creativity, but it's gotten out of hand. Do you remember why you were in the principal's office the last three times?

[Cut to Luz on stage at an audition for Romeo and Juliet, holding a spork.]

Luz :O happy dagger, give me death!
[Luz stabs the spork into her torso before tearing her dress, making several links of sausages fall out. Everyone else on stage screams and runs. Loki was on the jury applauding. Cut to Luz sewing a pigeon head onto a squirrel's body, on a platform labelled "baby griffin".]

Luz: Now for the final anatomically correct touch, spider breath.
[She opens the model's beak. Many spiders come out, crawling over her and the table. People scream in terror, throwing objects everywhere. Cut to cheerleading tryouts, where a girl does a successful backflip. Every other student applauds.]

Luz: You think that's an impressive trick? [Throws her pom-poms to the side.] Take a look at this. [Turns around to reveal she flipped her eyelids inside out.] Bleep, bloop, bleep!
[Everyone else screams and runs, and it sounds like at least one person is gagging. Cut back to Principal Hal's office.]

Loki: She used her creativity, there's nothing wrong with that(Luz blush) . And one more thing, why am I here?

Principal Hal: You know why you're here. [Flashback: Outside School You Can See It's Covered in Toilet Paper]You covered the whole school in toilet paper.

Flashback 2 (the lobby is flooded with water and everyone is swimming) You flooded the school.

Flashback 3(In the cafeteria. Everyone is colored to the face) You put something in all the cafeteria food that made everyone vomit rainbow colors.

Flashback 4: (everyone runs away from a hyena) And I don't know how, but you brought a hyena in the school.

[Currently]
Loki: What good times. (grins)

Camila: Luz we all love that you express yourself, but if you can't learn to separate fantasy from reality, you may need to spend the summer here.
[She holds out a pamphlet for Reality Check Summer Camp. Luz takes it reluctantly.]

Luz: Don't worry, Mom. I won't let you down. [Stands up triumphantly.] No more weirdness!
[The snake in Luz's hand suddenly jumps out and bites the principal. He falls to the ground with a yell while the snake hisses.]

Luz: That doesn't count, right?

Loki: Definitely. (grin)

[Outside school, Loki walks towards a tree. He stands in front of the tree, then snaps his fingers and makes an elevator door open from the tree. Press a button and it goes up. The door closes and the then disappears. Loki takes the elevator down to a secret room. ]
Loki:(Get out of the elevator) Sorry it took me so long. (smiles at a tiny hyena)


Joker:(bark)

Loki: I was in the principal's office for the pranks I did. And I'm really sorry for what I did (Loki and Joker look at each other then start laughing) Ha! I don't regret anything! Especially when you've scared everyone in school into your bigger form. (Joker laughs)

Loki: So what do you want us to do? (Joker barks) We do not release animals from the Zoo. Not now, maybe later. I met a funny girl, quite interesting. She'll go to camp so she won't be strange anymore. (joker is confused) Yes, I know, it's weird. Let's see what she's going to do. (Joker transforms into his staff shape. He turns his head to be in flight mode. Loki sits on it and flies to a window that looks like a squirrel and go outside)

[Cut to Luz, who is standing disappointedly in front of her house.]

Camila [Exits the house.] Oh! Oh, my baby! [Hugs Luz.] Now, don't worry. Summer camp is only going to be for three months. You'll be so busy balancing checkbooks and learning to... appreciate public radio, the time will fly by!

Luz: But I don't like any of that stuff. I like editing anime clips to music and—and reading fantasy books with convoluted backstories.

Camila: Mija, your fantasy world is holding you back. Do you have any friends? Real ones, not imagined or drawn or reptilian?
[Luz drops her book, disappointed. She walks slowly over to the trash bin.]

Camila: Summer camp is a chance to make some friends, but you have to try. Can you do that?

Luz :Yes, Mom.
[Luz puts her book, The Good Witch Azura, into the trash bin. Camila's phone vibrates in her purse.]

Camila: Oh. I gotta go to work. [Kisses Luz's forehead.] Your bus is coming soon. Text me when you get there. Cuídate mucho, mi hija. ¡Qué te vaya bien! [Walks away.]

[Unbeknownst to anyone, Loki was sitting on a cloud staring at Luz. And Joker eats from the cloud like cotton candy]

Luz: Bye, Mom. [Watches her leave, then gasps and rummages through the bin.] Where is it? Where is it?
[An owl hoots. Luz looks up and sees a little owl, her book sticking out of the bag in his beak. Loki smiles to see this owl with interest. The owl turns and flies away.]

Luz: Tiny trash thief!
[Luz chases the owl. Loki looks at this scene with amusement.  Luz pauses when the reach a decrepit abandoned house, but the owl continues right inside. Luz stares at the house. Luz growls. Steeling her nerves, Luz runs inside. The front door slams shut behind her, and the entire inside glows, visible through the windows and the holes in the roof.]

Loki:(gets off the cloud and stands in front of the door with Joker) Well look at this. It seems to be a way back to Bolling Isles. (looks at Joker) Are you ready to go back home? (Joker barks)
Let's go. (He enters the house with the Joker and the same thing happens to both of them as what happened to Luz)

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