The ride is peaceful and there's this Christian album playing from the CD player all the while.
Though the song is in another language, most likely African, I can't help the feeling washing over me.
The peaceful feeling though so real, I still would find very difficult put into words.
Thank goodness I don't have to.

It's quite extraordinary and kind of makes me feel complete again; like I am so fulfilled I don't have any care in the world and what amazes me the most is that my life is far from fulfilled.

The last time I felt this way was about twenty years ago when I was still a Christian. I know I was very young then but there were so many things that happened in the first ten years of my life that I still remember so well. My mom often wonders how I'm able to remember so much but I think it's because I had a rough childhood and grew up too fast.
The emotions begin to build up so fast in me and by now, I'm not listening to the song anymore.
All I want to do is get out of the car, jump up and down and scream while laughing like crazy.
I know it's pretty stupid but that's exactly how I feel. My emotions are threatening to slip out of my control and I think Brian notices because he reaches out to slightly touch my hand that is on the armrest.

"Are you okay?" His eyes filled with concern search mine briefly before returning to the road.

"No, I'm alright, I was just distracted." The look on his face tells me he is still concerned and doesn't believe a word of what I just said but he just nods and doesn't push it. "Which song is this?" I ask and a smile lights up his face wiping away the previous look, his hand still gracing mine.
I don't make any effort to remove it because I prefer it there.

It has a strange calming effect.

"Oh, it's called Amaghimo by some guy called Password; he's Nigerian. I just fell in love with it the first day I heard it even though I don't understand a word he's saying." He chuckles and I smile thinly. 

"So how do you know what you're singing?"

"Well I don't really, but I have a Nigerian colleague and friend at work. He's from the area in Nigeria where they speak this language so he told me what it meant. It's a song of thanksgiving to God and that makes total sense to me because that's exactly how I feel when I listen to the song." He goes on and I just marvel at the way he looks when he gets excited.

His dimples go in a little deeper, his smile a little wider, his face a lot more radiant, his laugh a little merrier.

I never thought I'd see him merrier than I've seen him in previous times because I already feel he's the happiest person alive, but I'm obviously wrong because now I see that when he gets excited he's on a whole new level.

He must really love God.

I can't say the same thing about myself though because once I get hurt, I hold on to it forever and I don't mind it taking away my happiness in the process.

I usually am just out for revenge.

What would it be like to let go?

"Do you like it?" His question snaps me out of my reverie and I look up at him.

"Well...um yeah. I guess I do." A satisfied smile spreads across his face and his eyes twinkle.

"You can have it."

"Huh?" I blink surprisingly at him.

"I said you can have it, since you like it. I can always get another." I wasn't expecting him to do that but deep down, I'm really glad he does because I feel I would need to hear that song again.

The car slows to a stop at the magnificent iron gates of a tall building.
The building, more like a sky scraper, is basically doing a finer job than the street lights. From afar, it looks like one of those glowing swords from the Star Wars space opera.

Exciting really.

We are admitted and Brian drives past the neat array of exotic cars all lined up in a sophisticated parking fashion to a reserved parking spot labeled 'Managing Director'.

"You're the managing director of your company?" I ask some what surprised and he nods.

"Yup, why do you ask?"

"You just don't act like one." I shrug a little too stiffly and he chuckles softly.

"Well, how do managing directors act?" He smirks at me.

"I don't know how they do act but I know how they don't act." I smile, cocking an eyebrow at him.

"And what is that?" He leans closer in curiosity and my eyes lock with his green pools drawing me deeper in.
I have to catch myself before I go too deep and so I clear my throat returning my attention to the matter at hand.

"Well for one, they don't go around helping random ladies prepare dinner for their moms; neither do they call basically all the time to check on someone they barely even know. Not that I'm saying it's wrong..." I pause and look at him in a teasing way, "...it's just, not the usual." I shrug.

"You're not a random lady to me, you're special." I look at him and his eyes hold no humor, meaning he isn't joking.
I let out a short laugh in the bid to reduce the tension meanwhile inside, my heart is close to palpitating and my cheeks are burning. I'm sure that if the lights are turned on, they'd be as red as crimson.

"Thanks… Brian. That was nice of you." I say but it comes out in a hurry because of the near palpitations.

"I wasn't trying to be nice." He smirks, obviously not noticing my discomfort and turns off the car.

"Also, I am a gentleman that sees it fit to help a friend in need all the time.
I know we MDs have a reputation of acting all high and mighty and unkind but not all of us are like that.
I am a Christian and as Christians, we shouldn't get too caught up in the world that we forget who we really are.
When I help people, I keep in mind that I'm not better than they are, I'm just more privileged. I am blessed, not for myself, but to be a blessing to others." He points out in a serious tone and I nod totally in awe of this guy.
I don't know how he does it but he just keeps my wonder at him increasing by the day.

I look away and let the words sink deep.

'I am blessed, not for myself, but to be a blessing to others.'

That phrase sounds very familiar.
I think I had heard it either in Sunday school or from mom or Tomi.

What if we all had that mentality, the world would be a better place.

Brian unlocks the doors and climbs out while I wait in the car because I suspect he wants to open my door for me.
I personally think that it's a bit unnecessary but it tends to hurt men's egos when we ladies do so ourselves. I don't want to hurt his ego, that's why I just wait in the car.

Men.

He pulls open the door and holds out his hand to me.
I smile and take it, lifting myself out of the car while he shuts the door behind me.

I slip my hand through the crook of his arm as he leads us forward.

We walk into a large hall dotted with people gathered in groups obviously doing introductions or discussing the latest news of the day.

Since I noticed earlier, attendance is strictly by invitation so they all have to be guests.

The hall is lit up majorly by a very large and magnificent chandelier hanging from the ceiling.
The walls are a bright peach color and have beautiful white curtains hanging from the top of the walls to the bottom.
Mini lights are stationed here and there and grace the entire hall giving it a very celestial look and feel.

Brian leads us to one of the groups that are busy in conversation and a burly man obviously in his sixties turns on noticing our presence.
Once he sees Brian, his eyes widen and he exclaimes.

"Oh hello Brian!" He holds out his hand and Brian takes it tipping his head in a slight bow. "How are you. We've been waiting for you." The man smiles and gestures to the rest of the people whom he was previously talking with.
By now they are no longer talking, their attention is now turned to us.

"Oh, I should have planned to come earlier then." Brian laughs softly and the others join in.

After shaking hands with a few of them, he then turns to me and leads me foward.

"Oh and everyone, this is Maya.. my friend and Maya, these are a few of my colleagues at work." I smile and do a short wave in greeting and there is a chorus of 'hi Maya's' before I feel the eyes of the elderly man Brian calles Mr. Wayne land on me.

He begins to stroke his chin while giving me a very thoughtful look.

"Hmmn, Maya Solana. I have been waiting a long time to meet you." He smiles at me and despite myself, I furrow my eyebrows in confusion.
I don't remember being introduced to him before now so how could he know me enough to want to see me.
I look up at Brian for maybe a clue but his face goes blank and I feel lost.

"I'm sorry but I don't remember being in contact with you before now." I point out good-naturedly.

"Oh that's right, but my reason is that our Brian here has never stopped talking about you my dear so I wanted to meet this famous Maya Solana." He smiles knowingly making the other guests that are standing around us laugh as they nod in agreement and my cheeks slowly reden.
I look up at Brian and see that he is glaring hard at Mr. Wayne who just ignores him and makes to proceed his humorous interrogation.

"O...oh really?" I stutter slightly and Mr. Wayne nods with a mischievous grin on his face and opens his mouth about to say something but is cut short by Brian moving in between us and placing an arm round his shoulders while subtly turning him away.

"Thank you very much Mr. Wayne, I think she knows who you are already, no need to suffocate her." At that a few of the guests laugh and I slowly let out the breath I had been holding, glad Brian had acted when he did.
I don't think I could have handled any more of that tension.

Despite his bluntness, Mr. Wayne seems like a really nice man and I like him. I can tell that he and Brian are really close by the way they interact with each other.
The way they look somehow reminds me of my dad and how we would have looked together had he lived to see all this.

I sigh sadly and tuck my hair behind my ear.
Shortly after Brian and Mr. Wayne are out of earshot, the few colleagues that Brian randomly introduced me to said their goodbyes and broke away obviously to greet other guests.

Just then, a tall pretty lady steps up to me.
She has straight blonde hair that falls down to her waist, large blue eyes and full pink lips making her look like a lifelike barbie doll.
Gosh she's pretty, I wonder if she's a model.

"Hi I'm Danielle Wayne and this is my brother Travis Wayne." She chirps friendlily while gesturing to a guy that is standing beside her whom I didn't notice before and he waves.
I think I was just a bit carried away by her looks.

She kind of reminds me of Mrs. Blake, only taller and prettier.

"Oh, that was your father." I chuckle jerking my thumb in the direction Brian just whisked Mr. Wayne off to and she nods.

"Yeah, don't mind our dad. He likes to trouble Brian a lot." Her brother whom she introduced as Travis speaks up and I laugh totally agreeing with him on that one.

"I see that. It's nice to meet you Danielle and Travis." I look from Danielle to Travis suddenly noticing the striking resemblance to their father.

"It's nicer to meet you Maya. We just wanted to say hi." Danielle smiles wryly and shakes my hand again before they both turn to leave. "I hope you have a nice time!" Danielle calls over her shoulder.

"I will, thank you." With that, they disappear into the crowd and I shake my head, not surprised that Mr. Wayne happens to be their dad.
I can't imagine just walking up to some random person all in the name of saying hello.
I'd rather stay within my own circle of friends. I know that makes me sound a bit snubbish but it's just because I'm too much of and introvert for all that socialization.

"I'm really sorry for running off like that. I had to get Mr. Wayne away from where he could do any harm." Brian's voice calls from behind me and relieved, I turn only to see an apologetic smile on his face.

"I can see he's a handful." I laugh.

"Tell me about it." He rolls his eyes and smirk.

"Oh I met his two children."

"Danielle and Travis?" He cocks an eyebrow at me sticking out his elbow for me to take.

"Yeah, those are the ones."

Brian leads us to our table and once we're seated, I pick up the menu and leaf through the pages.
I don't go out much and while at home or at work, I don't trust myself to try anything new so seeing the variety of dishes, I feel a bit adventurous and pick some strange sounding dish I spot.
I try to pronounce the name of the dish to the waiter but I think it's in French and I was never good at French so I jumble it all up.
Brian just laughs and helps me out while ordering something much simpler for himself.

Meanwhile, we talk about random things.

When I tell him about how mom's face and voice strangely got back to normal, he was overjoyed and it reminds me of what he said that day he came over to the hospital.

'....Ischemic stroke is not too big for him to handle.'
and I concurred, though not with as much confidence as he.

I'm still pretty skeptical about God; things just don't happen like that.

I've also learnt that this company is an investment company and is owned by Mr. Wayne. His two children, Danielle and Travis run most of the company along with Brian.

Immediately, the waiter arrives with our dishes, I dig in because the grumbling in my stomach just reminds me I didn't have anything to eat before leaving.
While eating, we talk a little more about my work, his work, mom and Lilly.
I really miss that dog. He says he had to leave her at a pet place to be here and I almost cry when he tells me how brave she was about it.

"Don't be surprised if one day you'd wake up and she's nowhere to be found because I would have stolen her and caught the next plane to Miami. She's just so adorable." I say dreamily.

"She's not adorable when she's eating like a horse." He chortles.

"I don't care, she's still adorable." I shrug and he just rolls his eyes.

Just then, the band begins to play a very beautiful classical music piece and a few people get up to dance while the others just seat and watch.
I get so lost in the music that I don't know when Brian gets up and is now standing beside me.

"Would you like to dance?" His voice snaps me out of my trance and I blink at him.

"What?"

"Do you want to dance?" My heart skips a beat. Did Brian just ask me to dance?

I guess he did.

"Um…okay." I smile and he holds his hand out for me and leads us to the dance floor.

I place my right hand on his shoulder and my left hand in his right hand while he slips his right hand through my waist and we begin to sway gently to the music.
We don't do all the complicated steps because I mean, nobody goes around learning all those dances anymore, the world has become too modernized in my opinion but I notice the skill with which Brian moves, like an experienced waltzer.

"You're quite good."

"Thanks, I used to take some classes in high school just for fun."

"That's interesting."

"I can see you don't waltz. Your first time?" He laughs and cocks an eyebrow at me.

"Yeah, only seen it done on TV." I chuckle as softly as I can in order not to make a noise.

I think even that the only reason there's a dance floor for waltzing is because the dinner theme is an ancient theme and in ancient dinner parties, there has to be waltzing.

I break away from my thoughts and find Brian looking intently at me. Once our eyes meet, he smiles and bends down to whisper in my ear.

"You're looking really stunning tonight." His breath tickles my neck as he says that and I can feel the tips of my ears along with my cheeks redden instantly.

Good gracious.

I blink hard wondering how to react because my stomach is just doing flip flops right now.

"Thanks." I whisper back glad I am able to get out that much.

The dance goes on for a few more minutes before the music ends and we all return to our tables.
When we're all seated, Mr. Wayne gets up from his table where he was sitting with Danielle and Travis and two other people and steps out holding a wine cup calling for everyone's attention.
I noticed in the menu that all the drinks are alcohol free and I wonder why.
From the little I know about dinners, there usually is at least some champagne but I saw nothing of the sort earlier when I scanned the menu for a drink, so I just had some grape wine instead.
I wanted to ask Brian about it but decided against it thinking it would be extremely rude of me.
Also, he's a Christian and would be totally against alcohol, but does it mean that Mr. Wayne and his two children are Christians too?

"Would you all please raise your glasses?"
I raise up my glass of grape wine and Brian does the same too just like everyone else.

"Thank you all for accepting our invitations to attend the celebration of our company's twentieth year in business." There is a loud applause from all corners of the hall and Mr. Wayne nods.

"It's been God's faithfulness all the way and we give all the glory to him. I remember twenty years ago when I was in my room in Detroit studying my bible one fateful night. I heard God's voice like it was coming from the pages of my Bible. He said: go to New York and I will show you what to do.
My wife and I were only a few years into our marriage with our two kids and were looking to build our family and life back there in Detroit when God's word came and we had to obey.
That same year, God instructed me to start this investment company after we had moved to New York. There was one problem though, I didn't have the capital, but… that was miraculously provided for. About five years down the line, there was nothing forthcoming from the business. I was still using a rented office and the bills were piling up. I was ready to give it all up and move back to Detroit when the Lord came again to me in a vision and told me: I sent you here, I told you to start all this, don't you think I'm going to see you through? My grace is sufficient for you Raymond.
Five years after, Wayne Investments had hit the papers as one of the most promising investment companies in New York City.
Today we have branches all over Europe, Africa and China! It could have only been God." He finishes and there is a loud round of applause

"Cheers to breaking boundaries and making history!" He bellows.

"Cheers to breaking boundaries and making history!!" We all chorus and clink our glasses before downing them.

That obviously answers my question; they are Christians.

After that, people approach Mr. Wayne to congratulate him for a job well done with hugs, handshakes, pats on the back and words of encouragement before returning to their seats for dessert.

"Would you like some fresh air?" Brian asks me suddenly and I agree realizing I'll really like to step outdoors for a minute since I'm not ready to have dessert yet.

We exit the double doors into the late night breeze.
The wind plays softly with my hair as we seatt on the bench overlooking the beautiful garden which I can tell is the job of very good and experienced gardeners.

Our gardener back at home does quite a good job too, only I haven't been paying much attention to the garden lately even though I love gardening.
The parking lot is on the other side of the building, that's why I didn't notice the garden when we initially arrived for the party.

"Thanks Brian. I've really had a nice time so far." I smile at him and he nods.

"I'm glad. This party means quite a lot to me because Mr. Wayne and his wife mean so much to me." He smiles.

"Oh wow but I don't remember meeting his wife or seeing her at all." I point out.

"Yeah, she's away in Africa. She couldn't make it back here for the party but she'll be around this Christmas." He supplies and I nod.
It all falls into place now.

"How did you get to know them?"

"My dad was very good friends with Mr. Wayne. When they relocated to our neighborhood twenty years ago, my dad helped him out in a lot of things and they became really close. When my dad died a few years after, Mr. Wayne became like a father to me, and Danielle and Travis like my own siblings. Mrs. Wayne was also one of my favorite women in the world, of course after my mom.
When Mr. Wayne and Mrs. Wayne got the instruction to start up Wayne Investments, Danielle, Travis and I were just entering high school.
By the time we were done with college, Wayne Investments had grown so big and it was such a coincidence that all three of us studied business related courses so we began to work in Wayne Investments and here we are today."

"That's really beautiful." I remark suddenly remembering my own family.

The flashbacks of that terrible night flood my memory, slowly blocking out reality.

I am no longer in the garden with Brian, but on the bridge, the droplets of rain sticking my hair to my face. The voices grow louder and I feel myself drawn deeper into that memory, relieving it.

"Maya, get out of here! Go find help." My mom shouted but I couldn't move, I just sat there transfixed to the spot drinking in the horrible sight before me, the tears cascading down my face. I was too confused to even sob, my chest was just heaving uncontrollably. My mom kept screaming at me but I wasn't listening until something snapped in me and I turned and ran.

"Maya."

"Maya are you okay? Maya!" I feel someone shake me firmly but softly and I'm jerked back into reality.
Brian is stooping in front of me and shaking my shoulders.
I just realize my face and neck are covered in sweat and a lone tear has escaped my eyes, rolling down my face until it drops unto my dress, leaving a damp dot behind.

I look at him with trembling lips and he immediately raises a hand to cup my cheek.

"I'm really sorry. I know I'm acting like a ninny." I sniff.

"Don't apologize, rather you have to tell me what's wrong." I nod and beckon for him to sit back down beside me, deciding I'm going to let it all out to him even if it will make me look stupid.
I have never done this before. Because of the trauma caused by the accident, I've, all the while kept my feelings bottled up for years and never really told anyone about that night, even Tomi.

When it happened she was too young to understand, and as we grew up it never came up so I left it that way.
All anybody ever knew about what happened that night was what my mom told them and I know for a fact she didn't have the full picture.

Only I did.

"I used to be a Christian." I keep my eyes glued to the ground not wanting to make eye contact with him in case I get scared and chicken out of this whole confession thing.
I really need to get it off my chest.
He doesn't reply, just sits there speechless and I can feel him watching me intently so I go on.

"I grew up in church with both my parents; dutiful Christians. We didn't have much to spend, but to me my family was perfect.
My both parents loved God and each other. I especially adored my father and we were so close that my mom always teased us about it." I laugh softly remembering those times.

"Each night, he would read me stories from the Bible and teach me to pray. I gradually developed a good relationship with God in my own little way." I whisper, trying to conceal the breaking of my voice as another tear drops from my eyes to the grass.

"When I turned five, there was an accident. One rainy night, we were on a lonely bridge and dad was driving.
You couldn't see another car till about two miles away. It was pouring so much with rain that I couldn't see past the windscreen from the back seat where I was seating.
I could only imagine how much harder it was for my dad to drive.
I sensed danger and immediately began praying silently. For a brief moment, my dad turned to look at me and I saw something in his eyes; It was then I knew that I sensed right; something was very wrong.
My mom was asleep so she didn't see when my dad lost control of the vehicle briefly.
Almost immediately, there was this blinding light that shone through the windscreen, a loud horn and a heavy collision. The brakes failed and our car skidded to the other side of the bridge and hit the divider.
At once, everything went blank and I fell unconscious but only for a short time because I remember opening my eyes with a sharp pain in my upper arm. I tried to unbuckle my seat belt but it wouldn't move because it was jammed.
Finally, I got it off and screamed when I saw my dad in the front seat bleeding badly from his head. My mom was shaking him hard and crying and when she heard me scream, she looked at me and I saw fear in her eyes. She immediately began screaming at me to go and find help, obviously as an excuse to get me away from my dad, but I didn't… I couldn't move. I just kept staring at my dad in front of me. He was covered in so much blood and his left arm was....." I sniff, trying to keep my composure and I feel Brian wrap his arm around my shoulder.

"It's alright Maya. You don't have to tell me." He tries to pacify me and I shake my head.

"No, I want to." I look up at him with tears in my eyes and he nods reluctantly, so I proceed.

"He wasn't dead yet; he was still breathing and he looked at me even though he couldn't move and so I had the faintest ray of hope that he would be alright.
So I pushed open the door, stepped out in the rain and began to run, though not too far away. I screamed and called for help but no one came so I ran back to the car and my mom immediately pulled me to her and tried to block me from seeing my dad.
Unfortunately, she wasn't fast enough and I saw his eyes close. I couldn't take it; I gathered all the strength I could and pushed her away from me so I could see him well. He was dead. I saw my dad die and that was what my mom tried to avoid. I broke down; the little hope I had left crushed but not fully because I began to pray remembering how Jesus raised Lazarus.
You know what… nothing happened and that was when my last flicker of hope died. My dad was dead, really dead.
A few minutes later, an ambulance arrived but it was too late as far as I was concerned because my dad was already dead.
From then on, I cut myself off from the world and only let a few people in.
I was angry with God for not saving my dad because I trusted him, so I carried that grudge against God all my life until now. I couldn't understand why God let him die. My dad was perfect; he loved God with all his heart, he loved his family. He didn't deserve to die. Sometimes I wish I was in his place instead." I sob and Brian just pulls me closer to him allowing me to cry my heart out.
I try to stop myself because I notice I'm ruining his shirt but the tears just keep coming.
I have never cried like this in front of anyone since the day of the accident because after that day, I vowed to myself to always be strong. The only other time was at the funeral.

One would think that a five year old was too small to make such decisions but I wasn't any ordinary five year old. I had seen things no one at that age should have and so I toughened up real quick.

After a few minutes, my sobs subside and I pull away from him as he gives me his handkerchief to wipe my face.

"I'll make sure to get this dry cleaned along with your shirt and jacket." I sniff and give him an apologetic look.
His jacket is rumpled and his shirt has streaks of mascara all over the front.

"No you don't need to." He smiles at me and I know better than to push it because I'm sure Brian would still end up having his way, so I nod.
We sit there in silence for a few minutes and just stare at the garden.

"He loves you; more than you could ever imagine." I look up at him through my tears.

"You were his way before you decided to walk away. You know, if you were the only sinner who needed saving, he would've still died for you. That's how much he loves you." He whispers and I sigh shaking my head.

"Then why did he make my life a living hell?" I ask him, my lips quivering.

"He doesn't bring sadness Maya. Remember, he said in his word that his plans for us are always of good not evil to bring us to an expected end. Sometimes… things happen and we wonder why but like Paul said, "..we know in part..". Sometimes we don't even have the explanation but when we have at the back of our minds that he's ever faithful and loves us, it changes our whole outlook on things." He smiles softly.

"Sometimes he's saving us from danger ahead and sometimes he's preparing us for the greater good." He looks away ahead at nothing in particular and continues.

"He waited patiently for you all this time, he wants more than anything for you to come back to him. That's why he has kept you till now."

For about a few minutes, there is a thick silence between us as I brood over his words.

I don't know what to say. I want to be angry but I feel like I can't anymore.

I need peace in my life so desperately I can scream in frustration.

He waited for me.

I sniff and smile slightly at those words.

"There are a few good things that have come out if it." I nod in agreement, trying not to think so much on his last sentence because it's a bit too much for me to take in.

"There always are." He takes my hand in his and squeezes it gently before letting go and taking off his jacket to cover my bare shoulders with it.
That's very sweet of him considering I have just ruined his shirt and bawled all over his handkerchief but then I shouldn't be surprised because Brian is the sweetest guy I have ever met.

"I don't suppose you'd want to return to the party. I could drive you home right now if you want." He offers.

"Yeah I think that would be best. But I really did have a nice time." I assur him and he smirks.

"I am satisfied by just that." He says and I laugh as he pulls out his phone, I suspect, to inform Mr. Wayne and a few others that we would be leaving.

Once he's done, he gives me his hand and helps me up.

Yay, yay, yay; another chapter and the longest so far. I'm sorry for not publishing early, the chapter was just really long and I didn't want to split it.
I'm not going to go on in this author's note because I'm feeling really sleepy and i have to get some shut eye for Church.
So, happy Sunday to you all and as usual, comment and let me know your thoughts, vote, vote, vote and share.
Here's my IG handle if you want to check me out @owanta_chinwe

Goodbye for now 👋

Chinwe_epistle ❤