Yoongi and Jungkook parted ways after dinner, the younger programming his number into Yoongi's phone as Stud Muffin. Yoongi found it annoying, but even still, he didn't bother changing it.

It was late when he got back to the apartment, tiptoeing to avoid waking his roommate. Hoseok could be quite intimidating when ungraciously woken up from a deep slumber. But when he opened the door, he was surprised to find all the lights on.

"Hoseok?" He called out, kicking his shoes off and tucking them to the side. "Are you still up?"

Voices sounded from the kitchen, so he tentatively went to go investigate. He recognized Hoseok's bubbly tone, but there was a deeper, more calm voice accompanying him.

"Hey, Yoongi!" Hoseok greeted him when he found his way into the room. "This is Namjoon."

Yoongi's eyebrows shot up high on his forehead. Hoseok worked fast. "Nice to meet you, Namjoon."

"You too," Namjoon smiled warmly. "Hoseok was just telling me that you disappeared from Taehyung's party."

"Yeah, man," Hoseok chimed in, "where'd you go?"

Yoongi grabbed some water out of the fridge, taking a long gulp before facing the two boys. "Out," he said simply.

"Out?" Hoseok asked dubiously, knowing full well there was more to the story. "Okay. But what I really want to know is who was that guy pushing you out?"

"No one."

Hoseok grinned at him, his eyes lighting up in amusement. "Sure. Whatever you say."

"Alright, I'm going to leave you two be. Nice meeting you Namjoon. Good luck with this one," Yoongi stated as he ambled to his bedroom. His eyes felt heavy and he just wanted to sleep for an ungodly amount of time.

He went through his typical ministrations, washing his face and changing into loungewear. A toothbrush was lodged in his mouth as he patted toner onto his skin, the minty toothpaste slightly overwhelming his tastebuds. He was just about finished when his phone started buzzing on the counter.

The display name lit up the screen: Stud Muffin.

Yoongi let the call ring until it stopped. It was too late to deal with Jungkook right now.

But of course, his phone started ringing again and again and again. Yoongi spit out his toothpaste and grabbed the phone.

"What?"

"Aw, baby, what's wrong?" Jungkook's lilting voice said through the line.

Yoongi sighed, tucking the phone between his ear and shoulder as he applied moisturizer. "It's nearly two in the morning, Jungkook. There's no reason to call me right now."

"Yeah, well, I was bored."

"Try going to sleep. That will ease all boredom," the elder grumbled into the phone. He made his way into his bedroom and burrowed under the unkempt blankets.

Yoongi could practically feel Jungkook's smile forming on the other side of the phone. "Why are you always so grumpy?"

"You haven't seen grumpy yet, kid."

"No one is going to believe this fake relationship crap if you're always going to be this crabby, you know," the younger informed him smugly. "Can you try to - I don't know - act cheery or something?"

Yoongi ran his tongue over his teeth in frustration. "Telling someone to act happy is not going to help them be genuinely happy, Jungkook."

"Then I guess I'll just have to make you genuinely happy."

"I'm hanging up now."

"Wait!" Jungkook exclaimed hurriedly. "Can I ask you something?"

Yoongi rolled onto his back. "You're just going to go ahead and do it anyway, so have at it."

The younger chuckled lightly. "How long have you known Taehyung?"

This was better. Yoongi much preferred talking about anyone or anything else rather than himself. "I've known him for forever. He's like my little brother."

"Really?" The younger asked, sounding truly intrigued to hear about his crush. "Did you guys grow up together?"

"We're from the same hometown. He knew everyone in my friend group, so naturally we started hanging out as well. Taehyung's a good kid."

Jungkook sighed contentedly. "Yeah. He seems like it."

"How long have you liked him?" Yoongi questioned, easily envisioning the dreamy look Jungkook surely had on his face.

"Pretty much since I met him a couple months ago," the younger revealed honestly. "He made me so flustered at first, but as I worked more closely with him, I was really inspired by his passion. It's clear he loves his job and it's really energizing to be around him."

Yoongi smiled slyly to himself, wanting to tease him. "Maybe you like him just as a mentor or a role model."

Jungkook laughed, a soft and giddy sound. "I mean, I'd also like to slam him up against a wall and hear him moan my name, but sure. We can say I just like him as a role model."

"Ugh, I didn't need that image in my mind," Yoongi whined, using his free hand to cover his eyes.

Jungkook paused a moment before speaking up again. "I don't know if this will work, Yoongi. If you and Tae are as close as you say you are, there's no chance he'd look at me in any romantic way if he thinks you and I are dating."

The kid had a point. "I'll tell him you're just helping me out if it gets to the point where he's interested. Don't worry, we'll figure that part out."

"Okay," Jungkook agreed, relief evident in his voice. "But why'd you say if he becomes interested? That's no way to bulk up my confidence, buddy."

"Your confidence doesn't need any additional bulking up," Yoongi responded dryly. "I'm surprised you haven't already smooth talked your way into Taehyung's heart."

"It may come as a surprise to you, but I'm actually kind of shy," Jungkook stated matter-of-factly.

"You are not shy," the elder retorted, shaking his head to himself.

"I really am. It takes me a while to open up to people typically."

"Well, you opened up to me just fine. Am I not a person?" Yoongi questioned groggily, his eyelids falling shut.

"Huh, good point," the younger reflected. "Maybe you're just a little meow meow."

"The fuck?" Yoongi murmured under his breath.

A laugh erupted from Jungkook's side of the phone. "Sharp claws and sharp teeth, but I bet if I pet you you'd roll over and show your belly."

"In your dreams, kid. Now let me go to sleep. I'll figure out where we go from here in the morning."

"Alright, alright," Jungkook relented. "Night, meow meow."

"Jungkook."

"Baby."

Yoongi hung up the phone and shoved a pillow over his face.

This kid was going to destroy Yoongi's patience, he already knew it.

▪︎ ▪︎ ▪︎

》 V A L E N W R I T I N G 《

I know a lot is going on in the world right now. It's scary and unprecedented, but I'm trying to remain hopeful. I've heard a lot of heartwarming stories over the last few weeks, so I'm focusing on that. I'm also using this time and energy to make sure my loved ones know how important they are to me.

And you all are so important to me as well! I'm wishing the best for every single one of you and praying we see the end of this pandemic very soon. We'll make it through together, guys. Let's stay strong and hopeful as a team.

Borahae 💜