Feather walked into the situation room, feeling the stares of serious-faced men and women pinpointed at her.  "So why can't you find Crazy?"

The NSA agent, who had followed her from the interrogation room, shrugged. "We think we know the vicinity in which she lives, but she's smart, she knows we want to get her. She has been going around a bunch of different Best Buys and libraries and used computers there so we can't triangulate her location."

"Well, it's easy to get her out of hiding! Just have her come to you!" Feather beamed, seeing the brilliance of her plan and realizing she was smarter than the entirety of the U.S. government.

The agent crossed his arms. "How exactly would you propose we get an extremely cautious plotter out of hiding?"

Feather punched a few buttons on her phone. "You just invite her to come help attack this girl named Moon, easy! You see, the Kentucky attack was obviously a horde of fans who were sent after this girl. I don't know how it ended, but if she's alive, I bet she went right back to her house anyways and didn't think twice about it. Crazy is on her way there as we speak!"

The folks in the room looked at each other, then the NSA agent cleared his throat. "So you want to put an innocent civilian in danger, even risking her life?"

"Well, she's not innocent, but yeah," Feather replied.

The agent smirked. "I love it, collateral damage is how the U.S. government works, let's go!"

He pressed a button on his tablet and a loud alarm suddenly blared through the base, with the lights dramatically flashing red. Battalions of solders ran past the doors, firing rounds of bullets at the roof and shouting at each other. Fire sprinklers went off from the ceiling and the room filled with nauseating smoke, sending Feather and some of the agents into violent coughing fits. A team clad in body armor, gas masks and vests that read "SWAT" in glowing white letters charged into the room, brandishing machine guns and grenades.

The agent quickly pressed the button again and the alarm shut off. "Oops, I pressed the zombie apocalypse button, I meant to hit the terrorist manhunt button. Oh well, let's try that again."

The horde of mismatched government employees and Feather traipsed outside to see massive fighter jets rolling out of hangars that seemed to appear out of nowhere. Tanks were doing figure eights on the cement, with turrets waving back and forth like a dog wagging its tail. Helicopters lifted into the air by the hundreds and then propelled themselves forward, falling into V-formation. A few missile silos lifted out of pedestals in the ground, with one nearly impaling Feather. They were complete with LED screens on the outside flashing the words "AWAITING TARGET".

"So this is where tax money is going!" Feather clapped her hands excitedly. "Can we fire one of the missiles at Duskie's house?"

The NSA agent shook his head no, but reached over and grabbed a cylindrical object from a nearby soldier. She realized it was a Starbucks cup; it was obvious it was authentically Starbucks since her name had been spelled "Phether". She peered at the label on the side. "Venti mocha latte with soy milk and an extra shot of expresso."

"I SAID AN ICED LATTE!" she roared, hurling the cup at the soldier it had come from.

The agent glared at the man who had given him the drink and waved him away. That soldier, dripping from head to toe with scalding coffee, scurried off to get the latte correct.