I took the hour I had to myself to gather my thoughts, especially about my relationship with my mother. Truthfully, I didn't want it to be like our previous encounter all of the time: awkward, hesitant, borderline angry. While she had never outright supported my decision to move away so quickly, she hadn't exactly stopped me. I think that she understood that after Papa died, I needed to get away. There were too many memories of him in this house and on this land, and the only way I could heal was to get away. When I first notified her I started my music career, she wasn't exactly supportive, but she told me that as long as I enjoyed what I was doing and could make a decent enough living off of it, I should go for it.

To say I was disappointed but would be an understatement. It was hard enough having to deal with graduating from college, Papa dying, moving out on my own, and starting a music career. I needed support. Rose and Christina had been more than happy for me to do something I enjoyed, but it wasn't the same. If Papa had been around, he would have loved the idea. It was him that always thought I should be a singer. I guess Ma never shared the sentiment, and it showed.

I can recall what led to the anger. I had offered Ma and Austin a ticket to my first concert. Austin was raring to go and happily accepted the front row seat. Ma, on the other hand, replied with a harsh no and proceeded to tell me how I was wasting whatever smarts I had gained in college. She complained about helping me pay my way through four years only to throw that money away. She ended the call with, "Don't call me when you're living on the streets. That's where you belong if you become a singer."

It was hurtful. It was uncalled for. And it was totally unfair, considering Austin went into the music industry as well. Of course, he always had been Ma's favorite. Austin was the golden child. While I had barely managed to scrape through college, Austin had graduated with honors. He was charismatic, charming, and just a great guy. I was socially awkward around new people and in new situations. I did open up once you got to know me, but I wasn't a cheery, talkative person right off of the bat. I tended to blend into the background instead of stepping forward into the spotlight. Singing had helped me become more comfortable and confident with myself, but I still had a lot of doubt and insecurities.

"Claire Bear! It's dinner time!" Austin called.

"Coming!" I yelled. I pulled my hair back with a hair tie and proceeded down the stairs.

The table was set nicely. The tablecloth was lace, and Ma had set out some of her china. For a moment, I regretted not changing out of my simple jeans and tee, but it was too late to do anything now. "What would you like to drink, Claire?"

I looked up in shock. "Water is fine, Ma." I made no move as she poured water from the picture into my glass.

She glanced up at me before moving to the other side of the table. "Well, aren't you going to sit? It's only polite, and I know I raised you better."

I bit back a retort, reminding myself that I was no longer sixteen years old. I managed to gracefully slide into my seat. Austin sat across from me and offered a small smile of encouragement. I tapped my fingers against the table in reply.

Ma brought out the food and laid it out on the table. It was a chicken casserole, green beans, mashed potatoes with gravy, and rolls. "I also have a pie when you two are finished," Ma commented.

Austin snorted. "We're not children, Ma. Do we really have to wait until we eat first?"

Ma patted his shoulder. "Yes, you do." She turned to me. "Claire, would you like to say the blessing?"

I shifted uncomfortably. "I...sure." I closed my eyes and said a quick, short blessing. It was strange. I hadn't performed an action such as praying in a long time. When Papa passed, I had pushed away aspects of my past. I guess religion was one of them.

We began eating in silence. It went on that way for quite a while. I was enjoying it, actually. It was better than the alternative, which meant talking to Ma or having to listen to Ma praise Austin for all he had accomplished.

Of course, I should have known I jinxed myself. "So, Claire, do you have a new album coming out soon?"

I almost choked. "Are you seriously asking me about my music?" I asked incredulously. Ma nodded calmly. I breathed out heavily. "It's coming along. I wrote a lot of new material about a week or two ago. I didn't manage to really get in the studio and edit it, but I did record."

"Are you still touring?"

I shook my head and picked at my food. "No, I'm not touring right now. I just finished a stint with Pentatonix. I figured after that, I needed some down time. I think after I finish putting together an album, though, I'll go touring again. I'd love to go back to Europe."

"Europe? What part do you enjoy the most?"

"I think Ireland is my favorite place besides Spain. There's culture everywhere, though. It's amazing to just immerse yourself in the lifestyle and experience it firsthand. There's so much art and music out there. It's astounding, really."

She nodded. "Would you consider playing a show near home?"

I was slightly confused. "Here? Yeah, I guess I could. Why?"

Ma shrugged. "A lot of the locals talk about you. You're just as famous as your brother."

I bit my lip. "Do you talk about me, my music that is?"

Ma looked slightly affronted. "Of course I do!" She sighed. "I know you think I must hate you, Claire. The things I said in the past, the decisions and comments I made, were wrong. I never meant to hurt you. I was upset at the time, and I took my emotions out on you. I am so very sorry I did, and I know you may never forgive me. But I would like to try and fix our relationship. We're both getting older, and I would like to get to know you, the new you. Underneath, I always thought you were very brave to enter the music world. You are incredibly talented, and I know your father would be proud. I am proud. I love you, Claire. I never stopped, and I'm terribly sorry my actions haven't reflected that."

I had no idea what to say.

Shit, where was Avi when I needed him? He was good at this emotional stuff. He would know what to say.

Austin nudged me under the table. I had taken too long to reply. "I'm willing to work on our relationship, Ma," I responded.

Did I forgive her? I didn't forgive very easily, especially when people close to me hurt me. Would I forgive her? Of course. At the end of the day, she was my mother, and she loved me. I loved her. I was simply too stubborn to not hold a bit of a grudge. We would have to work on it, but I had no doubt that we would regain a semblance of what our relationship used to be before Papa died. Hell, we might even be a family again.

That would be nice.