UNEDITED: point out all the typos if you guys can? And Umm sorry?

I stare at her blankly.

"I don't believe you." I say.

"You do." She says,"Even you know just how-"

"I don't believe you." I say but my voice shakes.

"Face it Clara-"

"No!" I yell as tears threaten to fall,"He wouldn't do that. He would never do that and lie to me about it."

"He's Jake Henderson-"

He's Jake Henderson. Of course he is. He's Jake Henderson and I'm Clara Wilson. Why wouldn't he lie to me? It was what we did to each other, we lied.

"- that's what I'm trying to stop you from doing." She says,"Stop ruining your life over a-"

"No." I say,"Don't even try to tell me you did this for me. That you threw this at my face now because this was for my good. That this was some twisted way of you trying to convince yourself that you are trying to be my a sister and protect me from a boy."

"Anything in your life that doesn't have Jake Henderson is for your own good." She says but there is something unconvincing about the way she's saying it, like it's a half assed attempt to convince herself,"You know it."

"He's not-"

"I'm telling you this now because you were ready to throw away your dream for the idea of a boy who doesn't even care." She says,"Trust me I've seen all there is to see behind those green eyes of his and there is nothing."

"Fuck you." I spit out,"I don't believe you. He would never lie to me."

"You know that's not true." She says,"Jake Henderson lies. You've known that since day one."

"Stop Michella, please just stop." I say.

"Tell me that you don't believe me." She says,"Id seen you the next morning during New Years. Id seen your face Clara. You know what he can do."

But he'd done it to protect me.
But he'd lied to me.

He'd lied to me so so many times.

So why couldn't- wouldn't he lie about the truth about his relationship with Michella?

He'd told me that there was nothing going on in between them. There never was anything going on in between them. It had been once and it was a mistake.

But Jake Henderson lies.

"I don't-"

Michella grabs me by my shoulders,"I did it for you Clara. You can't choose Jake. You need to-"

"Leave me." I say,"And go take your damn trash somewhere else. I don't care anymore. You can-"

"Listen to me Clara." She says, her grip on me tightening on my hand digging into my fading bruises and I hiss in pain,"You can't go. Not when it will mean you'll have to leave-"

"Get your hands off her Michella, now."Jake says calmly, I don't know how he found us but he was standing a few feet away, his green eyes blazing as he looked at Michella. Although his tone was calm the warning in his voice is clear,"You're hurting her."

Her grip on me loosens and I shove her away rubbing my wrists.

He looks at me worriedly,"Are you all right?"

I don't respond. I can't even get myself to look at him. But Michella was lying. She was most definitely lying. She had to be.

"Michella what the fuck did I tell you about laying a single finger on her?" Jake starts.

Michella's gaze on Jake is almost pleading as she says,"I told her the truth."

Jake gives her a confused look,"What?"

"Tell me that you didn't get Michella pregnant." I blurt out desperately.

"What?" He asks looking so shocked it could almost be funny.

Almost.

"Tell me that it wasn't you who got her pregnant." I plead,"Please tell me it wasn't you."

"What are you talking about?" He asks again and his gaze moves from me towards Michella.

"What did you tell her?" He asks,"What are you-"

"She was choosing MIT." Michella says carefully looking at Jake with a peculiar expression,"So I thought I would tell her the truth. So that she realised what a stupid choice she was making by going so far away from here for you. All despite the fact you can't be together."

"So I had to tell her the truth." Michella's voice shook slightly and there was a tone in her voice that I just couldn't place,"I told her the truth that you were the one who got me pregnant. So that she stays. So that she doesn't have to make a choice between-" she hesitates as if she's struggling to find the correct words,"She doesn't have to make a choice between what she actually needs to do and the idea of you."

Jake holds her gaze for just one moment and there is a silent agreement that passes between the both of them that I can't quite understand.

And then he breaks away from her gaze and turns towards me.

The look in his eyes is something I would never forget, a kind of helplessness that I've never ever forget. It's crushing and hopeless and Jake quickly ducks his head down clenching his fists.

And when he finally, finally looks back up his eyes held something of a calm acceptance as he says,"I should have told you."

No.
No.

"No." I say,"Y-You can't-"

"I'm sorry I didn't tell you about it before." He says,"I-I didn't know how."

A part of me so desperately wished that it was all a lie that it took everything in me not to just fall to my knees onto the ground and cry for over a century.

But I couldn't.
And I wouldn't.

Because I was stronger than that. I was stronger than letting Jake Henderson rip my heart into pieces again.

Or so I told myself.

"Why?" I ask but Jake ignores me and turns towards her.

"Michella leave." Jake says, I know he's put up a wall up again but even then I manage to get a peek at what was going on with him every time the wall cracked the slightest bit.

Utter defeat.
He'd given up.

And I think I had too.

"But-" She starts

"I won't." He interrupts,Michella,"Leave now. I know, okay? I won't. I just need to talk to her alone."

And then there is that look on Michella's face again, one mixed with relief and admiration but she nods and backs away. She gives me one last look and it's can almost be called apologetic but it vanishes just as quickly and she turns and walks away.

"Clara-" He starts and moving forward and I immediately shrink back, away from him.

"No." My voice comes out low and strangled,"Don't you ever touch me again."

He stops immediately rooted to his spot, staring at me with this sort of helplessness that makes me want to yell, I don't care what you've done, I'll forgive you for anything but I don't.

Because I'm better than that.

And I owe it to myself to believe that I deserve better than that.

"This is where I should start congratulating you." I say,"For making me fall for you again. For ruining me once again. For giving me just enough hope by lying to me and then tearing it down along with whatever was left of me."

He doesn't say anything and continue,"Do you enjoy doing this? Watch me break over you every single time you screw up? Do enjoy watching me cry over you again and again-"

"No I don't." He says,"Seeing you like this, it kills me but I-I can't, I-"

"You're the only one who can." I say,"When it comes to you I always lose. I can't seem to live without you and yet every time I let you near, I let myself believe that we have hope you manage to ruin me in a way that no one else can."

"I'm leaving-"

"I didn't care." I yell,"I never have. You know I would have followed you everywhere and anywhere and for you I would have found a way. Damn the consequences. As long as I loved you, I don't fucking care if you moved to the damn moon, I would have followed you."

"And I told you not to." He says,"I told you to stay away. Id told you from the beginning that we-"

"Then why?" I yell,"Why make me fall for you? Why do all those things for me? Why act to be something you're not?"

"You know why." He says,"It's because I lo-"

"Don't you fucking dare." I interrupt,"Don't you dare throw those words in my face as a reason. Not when it means nothing to you. Because you're a liar and you are a coward."

He clenches his fist tighter.

"You're leaving because you know that it's the truth." I say,"You're not leaving for me. You're leaving because you are fucking terrified of facing yourself."

I wipe my tears off hastily and look at him,"I should have told you to leave the second you came into my life, because I knew that this is exactly where this would lead. You're a liar and yet for some reason I believed everything that came out of your mouth. Did it mean anything you?"

He doesn't say anything.

"I believed that you actually cared this time around,that I wasn't some game for you." I say,"Nothing has changed since camp, for you I'm still the girl whose feelings you played with, the girl who would be stupid enough to fall for your charms, the naïve girl who wore her damn heart on her sleeve just so that you could snatch it-"

I can't complete the sentence and I stop a sob escaping my lips despite myself.

"You know I'm not worth the tears."He says quietly,"Because youre right I'm a coward and a liar."

"Then why do I still want to forgive you?" I say crying,"Why does the fact that despite the fact that you've got me scattered into a million pieces do I want to forgive you?"

"No you don't." He says,"You have every right to hate me."

"I hate you so much and yet I can't stop loving you. It hurts." I say,"But I shouldn't. I shouldn't love you. Every bone in my body tells me that you're a mistake but at the same time everything tells me that this what I want. That loving you is as right as it is wrong."

"But I can't trust you." I say,"I never should have trusted you."

"You played with my feelings, you played with my sister's life. It's no wonder she hates me so much." I continue,"She hates me because not only did I make her lose her baby but I took you away too."

"And you- you." I say stammering,"You flaunted me in front of her. That's why you'd agreed to help me with Alec in the first place didn't you? So that in turn you could cruelly throw me in Michella's face?"

"Yes." He says, his voice hollow,"That's why."

He's not fighting me anymore, he's not even trying to defend himself. It was as if he was so utterly done with everything.

He'd given up.

"How?" I say my voice breaking,"How do you expect me to ever forgive you for that?"

"I-I can't fight for you Jake." I say closing my eyes and just saying those words are crushing me, how true everything is,"I-I just can't do this anymore. I can't keep killing myself trying to figure out if I can trust you or not. Because in the end the correct answer will always be no. You'll always lie. And yet when it comes to you I'll choose the wrong one. Because I want to believe the best in you even though we both know that there is nothing redeemable left in you."

"Everything between us was a lie. It was always a game for you and if I do this again, If I let myself even hope for the idea of you I'll go down this road again. And I can't. I don't have it in me for you to break my heart over you again and again. Not anymore because I'm not going to be able to survive it."

"I know." He says his tone soft and calm. He's retreated back behind his wall and I don't even try to figure out what's going on behind it.

"So you did win." I say,"You managed to destroy me once again.You found me, you fixed me and then you shattered me."

"But the joke is on me because I knew you were going to break my heart, I knew you were a terrible person right from the start so shame on me for believing you. For thinking that I could change you. That in the end you really were different. That for you I was really different."

"You were." He starts,"You've always been. You know that."

"No. I don't. " I say,"Because everything that comes out of your mouth is a lie. This is a lie. And you're still lying to me Jake. Because I don't know what's the truth when it comes to you. What new skeleton you're going to dig up from your closet that manages to break my heart again."

"I know." He says,"I shouldn't have come back. I shouldn't have come to you that night in the rain. And I shouldn't have fallen in-"

"No." I say,"I don't want to hear you lie. Not again. Not about that. Because you don't know the definition of love Jake. You've never loved anyone, or anything and I feel sorry for you."

"Because if you did. If you really did love me. You wouldnt throw it at my face to cover up for your pathetic lies." I say," You wouldn't mess with me and Michella's feelings, especially when it involved her pregnancy. I was the reason she lost her baby. And then I went with you to just rub her face in it."

"Everyone is right about you in the end. Beneath the act you put up you're still just a cold hearted coward. And no matter how much you try to convince otherwise you are just like your father."

Jake's face goes slack immediately and he pales. His eyes are a dark shade of murky green so opaque that it looks black.

"So leave Jake." I say,"If you cared about us, even the slightest bit you're going to leave like you promised and you're going to stay away from me, and never ever come back. Because we are done. I am done."

I turn around to leave and take a step forward before he grabs my wrist and pulls me towards him.

He opens his mouth to sag something but he shuts it again as if he can't get the words out.

"I'm sorry." He finally manages to say and lets go of my hand.

"Don't." I say,"You owe it to me not to lie to me. You owe it to me to leave me alone. And you owe it to me to get out of my life so I can pick up the pieces. And I can't do it with you. Not when I know what you did. Not when I know why you set up that whole fake dating thing anyway. I can't forgive you for that Jake and I'm never going to."

With that I turn and leave.

And this time he doesn't stop me.

___________

I think I made it through the reception with my head down.

Thankfully we had been far enough from the reception so that nobody heard us or seen everything that had gone on outside.

I weave my way through the crowd, with the singular purpose of getting as far away from here as possible.

I'm lucky I don't run into anyone and pretty soon I'm out on the road. I don't know where I want to go and what I want to do.

I just feel so lost.

I manage to make it till Rebecca's car, at the end of the road before I broke down.

It was crushing and all consuming and it felt like someone had just ripped my heart out.

He lied.
He lied.
He lied.

Go away and never come back.
It's because I lo-

And then suddenly Alec appears in my field of view who bends over slightly looking at me with concern.

"Clara, what happened where did you-" Alec starts but I don't hear the rest because everything has blurred into the background and I was a crying, sobbing mess who could barely stand.

I couldn't breathe and neither could I  stop crying for long enough to actually get a hold of myself and at least start my desperately useless attempts to convince myself that Jake wasn't worth it.

"It's going to be okay." Alec says and I realise that he had his arms wrapped around me and I had been crying into his shoulder.

This who I should have chosen.
This is the boy who had always been the right choice and yet-

"What the hell happened?" Rebecca stood in her high heels, arms crossed, a few feet away taking the scene in.

I don't know how it must have looked, me crying like there was no tomorrow and Alec's arms around me keeping me up but at that moment I didn't care.

"What the hell did you do to her now?" Rebecca marches up glaring at Alec. She puts her hand on my shoulder and tugs me away.

"Shit Clara." She says,"What happened?"

"J-Jake h-he-" I manage to hiccup out before I start sobbing again. Just saying his name sent me toppling over the edge.

"Is it because he's leaving?" She asks gently,"Because you can get him back Clara. I know you can. You-"

"N-no." I try saying helplessly,"H-He- I-I can't-"

I just can't get the words out because I can't tell her what happened. I can't tell her about Eric. I can't tell her about Michella and I can't tell her how Jake Henderson once again broke my heart and left me shattered in a million pieces.

"I'm going to kill him." Alec mutters starting ahead but Rebecca stops him.

"You've already given that your best shot haven't you?" She says icily,"So shut up and don't move."

Alec instantly stops, his face going pale.

I'm still crying trying to stop desperately so that I can get two words out to say that it's okay, I'm fine and I'm crying because I was stupid enough to fall in love with a boy who had lied to me the entire time.

I was stupid enough not to choose the boy who was nearly perfect and the one who was always the right choice for me.

"What did she tell you?" Rebecca demands and Alec shrugs.

"I don't know I found her like this."

She turns her gaze back at me,"Clara I can't do anything unless you tell me what's wrong. Do you want me to get Jake, do you-"

"N-no." I shake my head through my tears. I can't see him.

Not now.
Not ever again.

"Why?" She asks,"What happened?"

I want to tell her something but I just can't.

"Alec if you had anything to do with this."Rebecca threatens,"I don't care, I'm going to kill you."

"I didn't do anything." Alec says,"I would never let her cry like this. Jake that bastard did-"

"I hardly think you're in a position to call him that considering what a class A asshole you are." She says,"Coming here scavenging for her the second she's weak and alone."

"S-stop." I manage to say but she doesn't listen.

"I don't know how you even have the audacity for asking her to give you a chance." She says,"To start over.How naive-"

"Rebecca stop." My voice is sturdier now but Rebecca carries on.

"-you think I am, to let you screw her all over again after-"

"Rebecca." My tone is enough to cut her midway.

"Look let's go sort this thing out with Jake." She stars,"I'm sure it's just a mis-"

"Why are you so hell bent on doing this?" I raise my voice,"Giving me hope over and over again. Making me go back to him over and over again. I'm done with him. I-I-"

I falter and then take a deep breath,"I have to be done with him."

Even saying that makes me want to cry all over again.

"So you go back to Alec." Rebecca says,"You know better than-"

"It's my fucking choice." I say getting angrier,"Alec has always been the right choice but you, you've always pushed me towards Jake. Why? Just because it's like some movie to you? It's my life and I can't suit it according to you just because you can't stand Alec for some reason."

"It's because he isn't who you think-"

"He is." I explode,"Goddamn it Rebecca, he hasn't lied to me. He hasn't left me and he hasn't hurt me. He would never do that to me because he cares about me, he doesn't think that I'm some kind of you that can be tossed. Alec has always forgiven me and he is nothing like Jake because he's not a liar. He's better than me and and I don't deserve him."

"I am not some project of yours. I'm sorry that this happily ever after that you designed for me didn't work out. I'm sorry that you didn't get your romance novel and it's happy ending because newsflash Becca my life is not a romance novel with some cheesy characters and happy endings. It fucking sucks. It's not my fault and it's certainly not Alec's."

"Are you going to stand here? Rebecca completley ignores me and turns towards Alec,"Don't you at least have the damn balls to face up to what you-"

"Enough Rebecca." I say interjecting,"Stop it. You did this to me last time. You made me think that I had a shot with Jake, you always do this. Just because you live in this fantasy and it didn't work out for you. Alec didn't do anything, so stop taking your shit out on him."

"You and your fucking untainted image of Alec Evans is annoying as hell." She explodes,"Oh emgee look at his blonde hair, oh emgee he is so good just because he's nice to the unpopular kids. He can't even tell you the truth to your fucking face. Alec Evans is not perfect. And you can't sees urging wrong about him after him sleeping with every other girl on the fucking planet-"

"Rebecca-" Alec pleads and she turns towards him.

"No." She says,"I'm not covering up for your shit any longer. I would have told her long ago because she deserves to know the truth about you. The only reason I've kept it from her for so long is because Jake asked me to. Because I thought I was doing it for her. But now I don't give a fuck anymore, she deserve to see what an asshole you really are. That you're a liar, you're a cheater and you're a coward."

For a second it stuns me as to how close those words are to what I said to Jake.

But Alec wasn't any of those things. He'd always been there through my shit, through whatever I had done to him. He had always forgiven me because Alec Evans was perfect in every way and he wasn't any of those things.

Alec Evans was the right choice, he always had been and he didn't deserve what Rebecca was saying to him just for forgiving me, just for being there.

"And what about your so oh so changed boyfriend is he any better?" I sneer at Rebecca,"That's why you wanted me and Jake to work out so you have this deluded hope that Jeremy Hoffman, the lying cheating asshole that he is can be the one for you. Newsflash Rebecca! He's still a lying cheating asshole and you think I'm deluded? That's just freaking ironical."

"Because you know that holier than thou boyfriend you keep parading about?" I say,"He slept with Natalie.  Made a sex tape too. I had to shut them both up so you could live in your fairytale version of reality. So don't you dare tell me I'm the one who is deluded here."

As soon as I said it I knew what a stupid thing I had done. I could see it in her expression the mix of horror, anger and betrayal. She looked like she could burst into tears any moment. 

But she didn't. 

Instead she shut her eyes for two seconds and when she opened them, the girl standing in front of me was a completley different.

Her expression was poker faced and there was somewhat of a smirk on her lips. Her eyes were blank, a wall that was far more impenetrable  than Jake's.  At that moment I realised how little I knew about Rebecca Reynolds except for her smiley optimistic personality that couldn't be dampened.

At that moment it was like the Rebecca Reynolds I had known ceased to exist. And the girl in her place could might as well hate me if I could get a read on her expression.

"Okay." She says, her voice laced with poison,"Let's do this shall we? Let's play the whose boyfriend is a bigger asshole game here."

"Jeremy cheated on me with Natalie. Boo freaking hoo to me right? The young naive girl who got her heart broken.  I would feel bad but then looking at the  deal breaker you've got here." She says firmly but her hands are shaking.

She turns to Alec and then turns back to me,"I was covering up his shit because everyone else thinks you're made of porcelain when it comes to your knight in shining armour right here."

"The king of I can do no wrong." She says,"You want irony?Oh I'll give it to you. I was actually feeling bad about this but now I'm going to enjoy it. Alec Evans isn't as perfect as you think he is, in fact to be honest you're the only who thinks that Alec Evans is perfect. You say he won't lie to you, you say he won't play around with your feelings because he cares. Well I'm calling his bullshit."

"Alec cheated on you with Samantha.  The night of the accident, I walked in on them." She says,"Alec was drunk and so was she. But Alec knew how Samantha felt about him, he's always known and so just because he was mad at you he decided to come to the brilliant conclusion that sleeping with your best friend was a way to get back at you for damaging his ego. He took advantage of her feelings for him leading him on just to get some twisted sense of satisfaction to get back at you."

She turns to Alec who is standing pale faced and frozen,"You know there was a slim chance that I could have forgiven you. I could have forgiven you for playing with my friends heart. For leading Clara on for years and making Samantha feel like crap after you were the one who slept with her and took her virginity and never even acknowledged her again."

"I could have forgiven you if you had told them the truth." She says,"If you had told Clara the truth and made her stop feeling guilty about loving another boy when you've been fucking around with everyone else in the last two years."

I open my mouth to say something but I'm actually afraid to speak. Because Rebecca doesn't look mad, she's not like Natalie or Michella with their taunting. This was far worse.

Because the way she said then it was like she was simply stating facts.

"But then there is part two." She says turning back to me,"And this one is the finale."

"You asked me why I think Jake deserved you more than Alec." She says,"I didn't tell you this because I don't think you'd be able to handle the answer. But here goes, it's because Jake took the blame for the accident Alec caused. Just so that you, you didn't get hurt and your image of Alec that meant so fucking much for you didn't shatter."

"He did it because he was willing to take the blame for it for your sake by saying he was the one driving the car." She says," he wasn't the one who was drinking so the tests would come clear and the police wouldn't investigate. When in reality it was Alec. He was drunk, he was mad and he was driving. Jake had gone with him in order to calm him down after I gave him a reality check when he dared messing with my friends. Jake went with him so he didn't do anything stupid."

"But that's exactly what he did didn't he?" Rebecca continues,"He didn't see the truck coming because there was no truck, there never was. He was driving recklessly and stupidly. And he lost control of the car.But it does make you wonder how the car somehow sustained the most damage to Jake's side doesn't it?"

I stagger back shocked trying to get a grip on what was being told.

But I couldn't.  It was like everything I knew was being torn away from me violently from all sides and I was stuck in the middle at the eye of the storm unable to move.

"But Jake." She says,"Yes the boy who you are just letting go, knew what it would do to you, to see your prince charming fall so fucking ungracefully from his damn white horse. So he lied and took the blame and Alec happily went along with it because he couldn't have his precious reputation tarnished."

"If it hadn't been for Jake, golden boy here would be rotting in jail for DUI." She says,"Jake forgave him for your sake and took the blame for your sake and he begged me not to tell you, for your sake. so I didn't. I didn't do it for Alec but I did it because I saw how much he loved you."

I look at her my eyes wide open and my hands shaking. She looks as calm as ever but there is something underneath her eyes that I can't seem to place.

"I'm trying to show you how stupid you are being. I'm trying to help you but you are so thick it's fucking annoying. You can't make a choice because of your image of Alec Evans and I know I sound like a bitch when I say this but I've  wanted to take a hammer to it and smash that image of yours to bits."

She takes a deep breath and says,"And you know what Clara, once you realise that just how much you've sacrificed to maintain that image of his in your eyes and how you glossed  over all his mistakes just to convince yourself that Alec Evans was worth all those years of pining after him, you're going to realise that in the end he wasn't worth any of it."

"He was just a friend who was there, and you started worshipping him because you thought he's the only one who would stick around." She says,"He's not the only one. If you had just looked past him Clara, you'd see that I would have stuck by loyally with you, Samantha who has been racked with guilt for the past weeks trying to figure out a way to face you after her mistakes just because she wants to be your friend too."

"But it's always been Alec for you Clara." She says,"And I feel sorry for you because you lost all of the people who would have actually stuck by you because you couldn't let go of Alec and that it's taken you this long to realise that he isn't even close to person you think he is."

She turns to Alec who is standing frozen in his spot,"You've never deserved her. You've never deserved Samantha either and yet for some reason that I cannot fathom they see something redeemable in you. That's the only thing that's stopping me from kicking your ass to hell and beyond now. Because if it was upto me, you'd be dead already."

Rebecca gives me a final glance and I can see her eyes are glassy,"I hope you think he was worth it, that choosing him over all your friends was a decision  that you're going to stand by after knowing the truth, because I'm done with your shit Clara. I can't clean it up anymore."

And with that she turns leaving me all alone with Alec.

Author Note:

Author:breathe in. Breathe out. Breath in. Breathe out.

So shitty grammar aside this chapter was very hard for me to write. It's according to me one one of the most emotionally challenging chapters I've written especially when you can see just how badly Clara's world is tumbling.

Or maybe it's because I know both sides to the story right now.

It gets worse. I think. So brace yourselves and meditate.

On a lighter note thank you for all the amazing entries for the competition. It's officially closed and I'll be announcing the winners in the next chapter after I've gone through them all.

*Characters are currently not available as they are in their dressing rooms preparing for the next chapter*

Next update:Soonish.