"No, I don't believe you," Obi-Wan dismisses my tale.

"That's how we met," I say to him. "I don't understand why a diplomat would want to go to that lowly place, but she did. And she nearly got herself into trouble if I hadn't been around to lend a hand."

Since Obi-Wan's initial visit, he hasn't seemed to leave. I enjoy his company, even when we're both within the same vicinity, sleeping. His presence has a calming effect despite what we've been through together in recent time. We pick up right where we leave off when it comes to conversation, though a heavy topic still lingers in the back of my brain.

"It's like she knew based off of that one encounter alone," I muse.

"Well, she knows to pick good choices."

"Why, thank you." I bow dramatically against the sofa. "How very nice of you to say."

"Well, your dramatics certainly haven't lessened."

"Oh, no, why would they? Sarcasm is allowed out in the real world beyond the Jedi Temple."

"If you were still in training, I'd say let's go to the Temple and grab some practice sabers."

"What? You don't trust me with my own?" I raise a curious brow. "It's because I nearly trimmed your beard when you snuck in, isn't it? There's no shame in admitting it, Ben. There's nobody to tell." I gesture to the rest of the empty place. "What if we practice slowly? Or—or we use a mock lightsaber, other objects, to take their place?"

"I doubt Padmé would appreciate her lamps being destroyed, Thea."

I roll my eyes. "You're no fun, Kenobi. I think being a Master has sucked that clean out of you." I put my hands out, the Force stopping the pillow just before it crashes into my face. I peek around it, seeing Ben's intense concentration. "A pillow fight, seriously?"

"You said no lightsabers." He removes himself from the sofa, fighting for control of the pillow that's close to my face. "This is harmless fun."

"I'm amazed that you remember what that is," I mock him. My green eyes flicker to another pillow. I give it a flick of the wrist, and it smacks softly against the back of his head. His concentration doesn't waver.

"It takes a lot more than that to snap my focus. I think you've forgotten that."

I move inwards a few inches. The pillow remains still in the air. "I think you've forgotten that I haven't lost my touch with the Force. I wonder if that's illegal, to keep using it when you're not a Jedi anymore. I have a lightsaber still, too."

"I knew you didn't hand it over when you made the choice to leave. I knew it the second I saw you use it as if you never stopped your training. You could always appeal to the Council and see if they could let you continue your training."

"I'd hope it's not with pillows, because that's harmless, boring fun."

The two of us move inwards. The pillow starts to quiver from both forces pushing on it. It's not looking to explode from the pressure. I push an extra burst into my concentration, and as the pillow flies to Ben's head, I lunge for him. He deflects the pillow, sending it elsewhere, as we engage in a duel of blocks and kicks close to not-so-nice-places-to-kick.

"You know, since you're mending, you shouldn't be doing this."

"I'm not in pain now, I know my limits."

"Accidents can happen, Thea."

"You won't hurt me."

"So this is your new skill set," he pants.

"I didn't want others to know what I did before I became a bodyguard. I didn't want anyone asking questions."

"But Padmé asked."

"She's my employer, and a good friend. That's different." I put my hands against my hips. "I still address her formally, even when we're not out in public. It just slips sometimes. Just like how when I call you Ben. I'll bet I'm still the only one who calls you that."

"You've been the only one to ever call me that," he tells me softly.

The look in his eyes makes my heart sprint. No, no. You know better. You're not a Jedi, but he is. He walked away from this because of his duty to the Temple. We both did. We chose separate paths. His answer still remains the same.

"You've got that look again, Thea."

"I've got a look?"

"Everyone has one."

"Then what's my 'look', exactly?" I sit on the arm of the sofa.

"You've got an internal struggle going on, but it's too personal to say out loud."

I snort. "Does being a Master include training how to read minds?"

"No, sometimes your expressions are easy to read."

"You seem to be the only one other than Padmé who's ever been able to read me like that." I slip down to a cushion now. Ben remains standing, blue eyes not wavering from me.

"I won't pry if you don't want to tell me."

"Always respectful as ever," I say admiringly. He's what every man should be. Respected. Respectful. Strong, but humble. A strong voice who appeals to many ears listening for direction. An overall moral man who seems to choose the right option, time after time. I bite down on my lip, but the question comes out: "Did we miss our chance?"

"I'm sorry?"

"You know what I mean. Before I left and we both grew up. Did we miss our chance to have what my brother has?"

"Thea, we settled this then." Ben looks uncomfortable. I'm not feeling so great about this either, but my stupid mouth wanted to stir this pot.

"I know."

"Then why are you bringing this up?"

"You can't tell me that something hasn't woken inside of you, Obi-Wan." My eyes meet his. "From the time we got reintroduced back into each other's lives...Despite all the chaos that surrounds my brother and Padmé, they seem happy. They seem better, like they've found a light in this strange time we're in."

"But he has to be in secret, you know this as well as I do. We both agreed we weren't capable of hiding it."

"It's because the thought of being caught terrified us," I murmur. No longer able to sit still, I get up and begin to pace. "We were afraid to have our reputation destroyed."

"And now you're saying you're not?"

"No, that's not what I'm saying. I've been afraid from the moment I realized what I felt," I say. "I'm still afraid. When I became Padmé's security, I focused on her protection and nothing more. And then, lo and behold, ten years later, you walk back into my life, with my little brother at your side. We started back to our old ways, our old patterns. It dug up some things that I buried for years. We're still in our old ways now." I rub my forehead. This feels like it's crossing the border on history repeating itself, with the way this conversation is heading.

"Thea—"

"I know. It was years ago, it should've ended then." I begin pacing. "I shouldn't have said anything."

"Thea." Obi-Wan stands in my way, cutting my pacing off. "Breathe." He offers me a smile. "You babble nonsense when you don't breathe."

I give him a half-hearted glare. "Thank you for that reminder."

"Some things never change."

"They never do."

"I know your struggle. Working alongside you again, it wasn't as easy as I thought it would be."

This confession eases me a little bit. So he's been feeling it, too. Our past resurfacing in bits and pieces. It hurts to think, to want, what we almost had before.

"It seems as though we've reached a familiar impasse," I sigh. "If this talk offends you, please, say something. Don't try and play along for my benefit, if anything that would be insulting." When I look at Ben, I see that younger version of him. Time may have aged his body, but they haven't aged his eyes one bit. They are still the same as I remember them that day when we had this very discussion for the first time, the good and bad of it all.

For a while, he says nothing, and I begin to worry about what's running through his mind.

He leaves the room without as much as a goodbye.

This has spooked him. Instead of talking it out like last time, he's running from this. I'm not sure if he's going to come back, or if I've just caused the shatter of our trust and friendship.

It's hard to not feel offended by that abrupt exit.