Figthing for control
*Bree*
His breath feels warm against my skin as he pins me against the wall. A warm shiver runs down my spine as he detaches his lips from mine only to look into my eyes.
"Tom this is not right". I pant, biting my lip. "We can't do this. It's a mistake".
All I get as a response is yet another wild kiss, which I can't help but give in to.
As much as I am fighting, I know deep down that I want the exact same thing that he wants, I just feel so weak.
"Come on Bree". He whispers against my lips, sending another shiver down my spine. What is it about the way he says my name, it makes me just want to give in.
"This can't happen again". I reason, my eyes closed as he begins to kiss down my neck, I clench my fist.
"Tom". I bite my lip rather hard, to contain an inappropriate moan. "We can't". Pushing him away I take a deep breath.
Straightening my clothes, I take a few deep breaths before I can look up at him again, he is narrowing his eyes, making me feel like I am the unreasonable one here.
"I'm sorry". I finally say to him, even though I don't see any reason for me to be the one apologising first. "It's just.. Last time was..". I pause, licking my lips as his eyes are still fixating me. "A mistake".
Waiting for him to agree with me on this I look at him, but there is no words crossing his lips, no 'yes you are right Bree'. Just dead silence.
"I thought we agreed it never happened, to forget it, we agreed it was just a one time thing". I add, hoping that this would encourage him to talk.
But again, he remain silent, leaving me to do all the talking on this highly uncomfortable topic.
"Besides, I thought you didn't even remember". I sight dropping my head for a second. "I thought you didn't remember".
"You're not being serious are you ?" He suddenly speaks up, catching me by surprise. "I can't seem to stop thinking about it".
My eyes widen instantly as he speaks to me, sounding all desperate and even a little bit angry. "I remember everything, every little detail about that night, as clear as it was yesterday".
He is running his fingers through his hair and as he does so, I instantly feel that familiar cramping in my lower stomach again, causing me to swallow hard as an attempt to ignore it.
Flashes of that night appears right before my eyes, showing me how I bury my fingers in his messy, slightly damp hair, tugging it, instantly making him moan.
"So you remember everything". I swallow again, pressing my lips together to contain a pretty shaky breath.
"Yep, everything". He nods, sinking his one hand into his jeans pocket as he glances at me.
"Why didn't you..". I bite my lip again pausing as I am trying to wrap my mind around the fact the he remembers everything just like me. "..tell me ?"
"Because you told me you didn't remember". He looks at me with an eyebrow raised.
"Right". I mumble blushing, nodding mainly to myself whilst trying to think about a solution for this messed up situation. Nothing comes to mind though, apart from forgetting it ever happened, which clearly doesn't work for any of us.
For a few minutes we just remains silent, standing awkward in my room. "Can I ask you something ?" I finally speak up again, clearing my throat. Our eyes meet and he gives me a nod.
"Why did you come back ? And why did you.. You know.. This ?" I nervously fiddle around with my fingers, unable to speak it out loud. Why did he come here and kiss me ? Why did he try to repeat what happened ? Did he even try to repeat it ?
"Well". He chuckles, slightly shaking his head before he looks up and right at me again. "Honestly ?" I nod.
"The entire flight here was complete torture for me and then the taxi ride.. I was about to lose my mind". He explains and I realise that he wasn't as calm as I thought he was. What a great actor that man is.
"I couldn't stop thinking about what happened because it was so fucking good". He licks his lip before biting it, closing his eyes for a second.
When I got to my room I tried to get the thoughts out of my mind, but it didn't work". He continues as I look at him with a confused expression. "I was losing my mind Bree. I was losing my mind over you. I just couldn't stop thinking about how good it felt. It felt as if.."
".. We just fit perfectly together". I cut him of, finishing his sentence. He gives me one of those look of both confusion and relief, from the other person apparently thinking the same as you.
"So you did too ?" Tom asks me, stepping a bit closer towards where I am standing. Biting my lip I nod my head.. Pleading guilty.
"Did you.." . "Lose my shit the entire way here too ? Yes I did. Why do you think I was so tense and awkward ?" I chuckle under my breath, feeling a slight relief.
"You were ?" His eyes widening, he lets out a little chuckle. "I honestly didn't notice. I was actually pretty focused on hiding my own little 'tension'".
We both instantly burst into a loud laughter despite this awkward topic and for a moment it feels all friendly and tension free.
"Tom ?" I ask, after we have both calmed down a little again from our unexpected laughter.
"Yes ?" He looks at me with one of his famous infectious smiles that immediately makes you smile as well.
"It can't happen again". I press out and his smile immediately disappears again.
"But..". "Tom ! It can't". I cut him of before he can begin to protest, because as much as I might be craving his touch right now, we just can't repeat this.
"Fine". He sighs, pouting slightly before taking another step towards me. "But tell me one thing before I go".
"Which is ?" I ask, immediately feeling all tense and crampy again, as he keeps coming closer to me.
His face is only a few millimetres away from mine, our noses are nearly brushing each other as he begins to whispers, his voice suddenly raw, sending a shiver down my spine.
"Tell me that you didn't think of doing it again. Tell me, that you didn't think of how good it felt. Tell me, that it wasn't the best sex you've ever had". Swallowing hard, I look deeply into his eyes, unable to look away, I get completely lost in them.
His breath feels warm and minty against my skin, causing my lower stomach to tighten again. "Tell me, Bree. Tell me, and I'll go and never speak a word of it again". He smirks at me, already knowing that I can't.
"Tom..." I pant, my lips parting as his are again so close to touching mine.
"Yes Bree ?" His smirk grows as he clearly notices how tense I have gotten and how I am fighting the urge to give in to him.
My heart is beating fast and my pulse is racing as he leans in even closer, his nose brushing my cheek teasing me.
He leads his hand up to my neck, tracing his fingers over my skin, which gives me goosebumps all over my body.
Taking a deep shaking breath, I glance up at him, his gorgeous blue eyes meeting mine as his lips brush mine for a split second and that is all what it takes for me to lose control.
That's all it takes for me to give in to my cravings.. To give in to him.
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