Aamna

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Aadhar card ✔️
School certificate✔️
Character certificate✔️
NEET marksheet✔️
Admission receipt✔️
Hostel receipt✔️

I checked my document one last time. Daryaganj police station is few meters away from me. I just needs to go inside ,show my papers and get verified . You must be wondering ,why I am going through this process . Police verification will help me to get jobs in others house. I can help in home schooling of kids. I can be house helper,baby sitter or cook. Unlike other kids I have no inhibition in doing anything which is decent work. I can do anything except selling my body. Many women choose that path but I don't want to travel that road. I am in dire need of money as my scholarship isn't credited in my account till now.

I looks towards the building. Everything is good but I don't know why my legs is trembling,my hands is shaking . I feels restlessness inside me, an unknown fear is engulfing me to run away , from this place ,but ,I moves ahead ,key of my secure future lies here.

Its really hard for me to suppress memories of my bitter past experiences. Event unfolded in police station years ago and consequences I faced after that.Faces of Ibrahim,DSP Dil bagh sing, Abba, Ammi,Iqra, Hussain, neighbours , relatives start appearing in front of my eyes. Their facial expressions haunts me. I am on the verge of crying.

"Allah raham"I murmurs and a lone tear roll down from my left eye. It makes it way towards my chin and falls down,making no difference on the already dusty road. Sometimes people became just like this road our tears makes no difference in their heart. No matter how much you weep you can't melt their heart just like this road.
"Its worthless "my inner voice comes just like a sunshine after a hurricane.
My memories is those hurricane which destroys everything comes in its way. Sometimes I wish a miracle to happen in my life which let me forget everything,every painful memory,people associated with it .

I keep my file close to my chest and holds it tightly as my shield from outer world. I enters inside police station and to my surprise there is a woman who is in the charge of station. I can't express in words how much relief pour over me. It ease my anxiety to some extent and to my surprise she is easy to approach.

"Isn't police unapproachable and ruthless?"question arises in my mind which I discard immediately. Constable piles Xerox copies of original documents in a file and now my part is over. This incident boost up my confidence and give me assurance to trust that , everyone is not demon out there.

I am really late for college as two lectures is over till now and I am rushing to not miss third one. I scan the classroom and runs towards Karuna to know about current prime problem, the chits from stranger.

"No"She mouth and I get another good news today.It seems today is lucky day for me.

"Whoohoo "immediately come out from my mouth. I twirl near my desk and bad news arrives. My eyes meet with Aamir and my smile drops. His sole attention is on me. I avert my eyes from his and focus on the diagram of brain on the blackboard. I can feel his eyes roaming on my body from tip to toe . This is indecent , this is wrong , Aamir stop it. I look him again and this time it's really hard to look away. Something very strong hold me from looking away. I can't deny it. I never feel like this before. I don't know how to deal with it. I already have many strong emotions in the plate, I can't deal with another one, not today,may be in future.

"What am I thinking? "I pat on my face to compose myself. I sit on my table and feel really bad for my whirlwind thoughts. Its really frustrating to loose control like this but why I am worrying.May be he is staring because of that salty bitter chit. Yes,thats the reason. Chit chapter is over for once and all. I should relax and focus on my studies. This thoughts bring back hope and joy in my heart.

********

My mood is so good after I didn't received another chit yesterday. After a while I feel secure and doesn't worry about what to expect next. We means me and Karuna passing by entrance and his car is not there.

"Aamir, nahi aaya "she says and I don't know she is telling me or asking.Its better to keep quiet.We reach our classroom and.... Things is not happening like I expected .Chit thing is here to stay for .... I drop my head-on my desk in disappointment.I move my head towards side and Karuna is eyeing Cadbury silk in my hand.
I am like , seriously ,girl control your taste buds,every thing doesn't meant to eat. You must be wondering what the scene of this Cadbury.

Few minutes ago me and Karuna entered in classroom and I was two hundred percent sure that those cringe worthy notes will go away but here I am , another chit with Chocolate waiting for me.

Dil ki kadavahato ko kam kijiye
Mitha khaiye aur Mohabbat phailaiye.

"Seriously"I murmurs .This guy is nuts. What he thinks a piece of sweet change my perspective towards things. I have learnt that lesson in most painful way. I have gone through a lot without any fault of mine. My only mistake is, I was at wrong place at wrong time. All because of men. Men are most privileged creation of our creator. They can do anything with anyone and nobody is there to question them. Everyone asked me multiple questions ,blamed me but not a single soul cross checked Ibrahim. They believed him in a heartbeat but my version left unsaid every single time. He molested me married me ,used me threw me out of his life and still it's my fault. Every single time it's my fault.
Men can't be accountable for anything. They can pass filthy remarks over women passing near by them without thinking twice. They can molested , harrass,rape or killed a woman and it still a woman's fault. Men is root of all problem. They are the rotten apple.

"Aamna" Karuna shakes me and break chain of my thoughts.After our classes is over ,I write something and leave it with same chocolate.

Badi shiddat se aajmate ho sabar mera
Jab khud pe beetegi to pata chalega.

**********

"Aamna "Karuna shouts from balcony. This girl is always on high on emotions just like older me, so excited for little things,so full of life.

"Aamna,Aamir is standing in front of our building"She comes with highest dose of excitement. I know deep down she likes that moron but she is not alone.Most of our classmates likes him ,you know it's hard to resist friendship with a wealthy powerful person. He has the power from his influential family background.

"He came to watch shital in balcony"I says nonchalantly.Shital is our classmates and crush of many. She is a woman , most of men dreams. Her eyes,hairs ,body structure , everything is perfect about her. Its pleasure for eyes to watch her ,she is that kind of beautiful.

"You are.....

"Go and Check that Shital is present in her balcony or not."I challenge her .

"But I thought he is ...she says after completing her checking mission.

"Every man is same. They can't resist beautiful girls.You think Aamir is different and can resist Shital in dresses. I know his taste in women."I complete writing last line of assignment with simultaneously discussing Aamir & his women.

"Women?"she raise her eyebrow in question.

"Yes, Aamir and his women. The way he is going ,I am sure he will marry more than once.Just imagine Aamir hide identity of his wives from each other. His kids proudly roaming in Lucknow. He is enjoying with other lovers .

"Lovers?"

"Karuna,you are so innocent. In three months he has one girlfriend and I heard, he is interested in another one."

"really?"her eyes widened in surprise.

"Yes, the way he is going he will marry a dozen women."

"But.." apprehension is present in her voice.

"He will divorce too"

"But this is exaggeration"

"I know our Casanova classmate.For your satisfaction he will marry only one and love everyone. "

"I feel pity for his future wife"

"I share your sentiments Karuna. Who will be the unlucky girl , whom this pervert will marry."I sighed.

"Aamna, you are doing character assassination of poor guy"

"He is not poor guy ,I can prove it."I drag her to balcony. His smile widens when he watch us.

"See,he smile towards us. He is genuine." She whispers with a broad smile.

"Look in left sweetheart"I point and Shital is also present in her balcony , waiving towards him.Karuna's smile drops and I said "told you".

"But I thought he really likes you."

"Yes ,you are right,he likes me just like he likes every other girl around him.He is not marriage material."my words bring disappointment on her face.I don't know when she develop this weird perception about me and Aamir. Reserve Aamna and pervert can't be in one team , neither today nor tomorrow.

"But if ask for marriage then ."

"Stop watching silly romantic movies,its corrupting your mind."I pat on her head before leaving towards our room.

Author note - Few clarifications from my side , I was absent due to two reasons. First is I am busy in my studies as exams season once again started in India and second one is someone close to me succumb to covid19. Stay safe,dont forget to wear mask and follow all guidelines. You and your loved ones doesn't deserve the pain and anxiety it brings with it. Stay Happy,stay healthy and take care of you and your loved ones. One more thing please remember me in your prayers.
Thanks for reading.