Eria was in love.

As the priestess and the second princess of the royal palace, she was not allowed to love. And no one else was allowed to love her. Thus, she never knew the true meaning of love.

But after meeting him, a special feeling gestated within her. It grew from a tiny flower bud that bloomed into a beautiful flower. She saw him in a different way, she thought of him every day, and whatever he did made her smile.

Everyone in the palace admitted Shouto was handsome, with his bi-coloured hair, heterochromatic eyes and his scar that charmed everyone he met. He may have an aloof personality and a cold exterior, but he was also kind and caring.

Eria had never experienced love before, but she knew her feelings for Shouto was love.

"Morning, Eria," said a soft, silky voice that Eria yearned to hear every time.

With a pink shade on her face, Eria whipped her head around to greet the handsome boy. "Morning, Shouto."

Shouto gently smiled, which became her motivation of the day. "Are you going for breakfast?"

Eria nodded. "I just finished my early prayers. Let's go together."

Walking side by side with her love made Eria's heartbeat boom in her ears. She has walked by his side every day, yet she could never get used to the anxiety. She loved walking next to Shouto; it made her feel like she was the closest person to Shouto, though only for a short period.

"What did you pray for today?" he asked.

"I prayed for the country's success today. There's going to be a huge ceremony today to sign a treaty with Tamome."

Tamome was the country Shouto came from. He was one of the princes there but he was 'loaned' to Eria's country, Scanda as a ward and a sign of trust.

Shouto slightly creased his eyebrows. Eria knew he never loved his country because his country never loved him, or he wouldn't be 'loaned' away like a property since young.

"Shouto," she chided.

He pouted his lips slightly. "......fine. I won't think bad of my country, even though it abandoned me."

Eria shook her head but smiled. She looked down at her hand. It was barely inches from Shouto's. She wanted to touch his hand for some time now and it ached her for not being able to do so, no matter how close she was.

"Shouto! Eria!"

Eria dreaded to hear that chirpy voice, but she never showed it on her face. As the priestess, she must show kindness, no matter how much she hated the person. It was all the contrary when a priestess must show love but could never love.

Momo, the first princess and Eria's sister of the same age, was soon to be the heir to the throne. They came from the same father but different mothers. Momo's mother, the current queen was of royal blood, while Eria's mother was just a peasant who lived on the streets. Thus, Momo was treated like a true royal but Eria was forced to be a priestess and to serve God for her whole life.

Even though Momo was kind and a natural beauty, Eria still disliked her sister. She disliked the disparity between the two of them; she disliked how she acted like a good sister even though she never inclined to help Eria. Probably Momo thought Eria enjoyed being a priestess for her whole life.

What even made Eria dislike Momo more was the rumour that has been circulating in the palace recently.

Momo will soon be engaged to Shouto, as a sign of friendship between the two war-torn countries.

Eria kept telling herself that rumours were just rumours—they could never be true. But deep down she knew, it was bound to happen anyway. The two were coming of age and looked like a pair made in heaven. And the two countries often looked for ways to mend their war-torn friendship, so it wasn't a surprise that a political marriage could easily do it.

It felt like her insides were breaking apart just by thinking of that.

"Eria, are you okay?" Shouto asked.

She nodded, trying her best to lie.

Shouto didn't seem convinced. His mouth opened to say something but then Momo dragged the both of them off to the dining hall.

"Come on! We're late for breakfast! Father doesn't like that!"

Feigning the brightest smile like she always did every day, Eria followed her sister, refusing to let Shouto ask anymore.

For she knew, if he pursued further, there's high chance she would give in.

***

The ceremony in the afternoon was extravagant and lavish. The royal courtroom was specially prepared for the occasion, with all royal courtesies upheld to welcome the current monarch of Tamome in order to sign the treaty of goodwill. The throne of Tamome was held by one of Shouto's older brothers, who had bore children nearly his age. Shouto was 7th in line, but there was no way it would reach him.

As the priestess, Eria began the ceremony by citing a prayer. After that, she stood at the very end of the courtroom, watching the whole ceremony silently. They prepared a lone chair for her at the corner with no handmaidens or anyone to accompany her. She was always lonely during long and boring ceremonies like this. Sometimes, Shouto found a way to her amidst all the boredom and they would talk for hours in whispers without anyone interrupting. She enjoyed times like this the most.

But this time, Shouto wasn't there to accompany her anymore.

Shouto stood in the middle of the courtroom, clad in a dashing white official suit, with Momo beside him, withstanding the crowd's cheers and camera flashes as the King of Scanda announced their engagement.

It broke Eria's fragile little heart into thousands of tiny shards.

She thought she was ready for this, as she has told herself so many times that Shouto was bound to marry someone—someone not her.

But as Eria looked upon the ceremony before her, she felt like she was going to die. Her head pounded painfully. She couldn't breathe properly. Her heart must have stopped beating.

Eria left her seat without anyone noticing, entered a small chamber of prayers in the end of the hallway, and cried for losing the only person she ever loved in this world.

***

Shouto knew it. He already knew what the ceremony was since a week ago. The whispers that haunted the hallways, the rumours that circulated in the palace, and the looks of admiration from the palace staff gave him the answer.

He hated being used as a pawn. He hated not being able to choose.

But he had no choice. He had no power. He was nothing but a puppet whose strings were pulled by his older brother on the throne.

When he was only five, his mother was thrown into jail for scarring the precious prince of Tamome. His mother didn't hate him, instead she was just trying to prevent her son from being 'loaned' to Tamome as a ward, hoping a boy with a disfigured look would never please the mighty royals of Scanda. But she failed, as he was sent off anyway, without ever saying goodbye.

Shouto's older brother, the King, was merciful to his people but not to his half-brothers. Afraid that they would overthrow him, the King accused one, sent one into war, killed one, banished one, and sent Shouto to another country.

Now, when Shouto thought he'd at least had a choice, being so far away from Tamome, he realised he never had a choice from the beginning.

Here he was, standing in the middle of the courtroom being the subject of the ceremony, forced to marry someone he never loved.

Momo was beautiful, kind, smart—the angel of Scanda, but Shouto had discovered beauty lied in someone else.

It was a highly regarded, highly honoured yet unloved priestess, who often feigned smiles to carry out her responsibilities.

Yet every time he was with her, she would show the most genuine smiles, something Shouto considered more beautiful than any jewels in the world.

Eria was the first friend Shouto made when he arrived to the palace as a gloomy, sad little boy. Whenever he saw her, he couldn't help but smile. That was either the power of a royal priestess, or just the power of Eria.

As they grew older, they grew closer and closer, to the point where Shouto realised he was in love with her.

He was in love with the way she moved, the way she smiled, the way she did her priestess work—literally everything of her.

He didn't know how she felt of him even though love was taboo for a priestess. But he still wanted to know.

Yet it was too late now.

For the whole ceremony, Shouto did not smile because he did not want to give in to the hungry crowd's satisfaction. He was an impassive mask, yet he was raging inside, angry for the unfairness.

He glanced at Eria. Her seat was empty.

Shouto's heart shattered. Was she happy for him? Or was she heartbroken as well?

Shouto resisted the urge to run off until the ceremony ended. Before the monarchs could get a hold of him, Shouto escaped their clutches and ran across the quiet hallway to reach a wooden door. He knocked bravely, knowing he could find her here.

"Go away," came a muffled voice from within.

Shouto opened the door, which was unlocked from the beginning, and found a girl curled up into a ball on the ground, wheezing and crying.

He knelt down and caressed her soft purple hair. "Don't cry. You look ugly when you cry," was the only thing he could say to comfort her.

"Shut up."

"Then why are you crying?"

"T-these are tears of joy! I'm happy for you." Eria finally looked up. Her eyes were swollen and her cheeks were puffy. Even so, she looked beautiful.

His thumb wiped off a tear on her cheek. "Really? I thought you'd be sad."

"I'm not sad! I'm happy for you. Marriage is a happy occasion. Everyone's happy," she explained.

"Everyone's happy, but I'm not," he replied honestly.

She blinked. "Why?"

Shouto reached out and touched her cheek. Its warmth soothed him. "Because I'm in love with you."

Her bright eyes widened in surprise. "Shou—"

"I love you."

Eria's hand touched his. "Shouto, you can't love me. Nobody can. I'm a priestess. I can't love anyone. It's my responsibility to dedicate my whole life for the sake of this country."

"But you love me."

Eria slightly shuddered, as if Shouto has spoken the truth. "The moment I found myself falling for you, I swore not to love anyone else. If you can't love someone, then I will stay by your side, until we grow old together and return to earth. I would dedicate my whole life for you, just like how you dedicate yours for this stupid nation."

It saddened him when Eria pushed his hand away. "Shouto, you can't be with me. Our nations need this marriage to mend its relationship. The war has torn too many families apart. I can't...... I can't watch people die anymore. I can't keep purifying their souls and mention prayers for them day after day again. I can't just—" Eria covered her ears as she remembered the horrified screams of people and the cries of orphaned children. She looked up into his eyes, tears welled in her eyes. "I'm sorry, Shouto. I can't be selfish."

Shouto bit his lips as he sat onto the ground, exasperated. He knew no matter how Eria hated her job, she would not watch innocent people die. But he would. The nation did nothing for him, so why should he? "Then let me be the sinner. Let me be selfish for once. Let me..." he gripped her hands tight. "Let me make a choice of my own for once."

Eria gently touched his cheek. She shook her head sadly. "I'm sorry, Shouto."

Shouto felt bitter and sad. No matter how much he loved her, no matter how much he wanted to do something, he still had no choice.

Silence befell on the two. Eria did not look at him anymore.

"Then tell me. Do you love me?"

Eria stared at him. "Shouto......"

"Tell me please."

She bit her lips and hesitated. But finally, she gave in. "I... I love you too."

It thrilled Shouto to know his feelings were reciprocated. His hands started to move on his own and touched her soft cheeks once more, startling her. He looked deeply into her eyes as they mesmerised him, drawing him closer to her.

Shouto leaned in to her face as a desire tempted him to do something he had always wanted to do. They stared at each other silently, but the close proximity between them held suffocating tension.

Shouto's heart was pounding painfully. All he could hear in this silence were his heartbeat and her breathing.

"One kiss. One kiss, and we will not..." the words ached in his throat. "We will not speak of this ever again. I promise."

Eria said nothing. She only stared at him silently. Shouto didn't know if he should proceed. But as he leaned in till their noses nearly touched, she did not push him away. After a short hesitation, their lips met, the caress of her lips softer than he could have imagined. It awakened all his senses and it finally made his soul complete.

After a while, they pulled away, both panting for air. That was it, he thought. That was the first and last time he would ever get close to her and it saddened him, even though
Shouto desired for more.

Unexpectedly, Eria wrapped her arms around his neck and pulled him in again. Her eyes were gleaming with desire, love and lust. Apparently, she was not satisfied, just like him.

"Just this once," she spoke gently against his lips. He agreed without objection. This time, his lips mashed against hers and she slightly opened her mouth for his tongue to slip in. The heat in his cheeks rose as their tongues touched, electric and delicious. She let out an elated moan and gasped for air. He looked at her puffed cheeks, eyes brimmed with love and lust. She inched closer and her hands draped over his neck as she sat on his lap. They stared at each other passionately, elated, but slightly saddened.

"I love you, Shouto," she confessed.

"I love you too, Eria," he replied.

They kissed again, neither rough nor soft, and not passionate either. It was sad and slow, like a kiss goodbye.

Shouto wished this moment would never end. This was the last time they'd be so close to each other. This was the last time they kissed.

This was the last time he would tell her he loved her.

***

AU! I woke up in the middle of the night and had this idea, so why not write it down? The actual story was supposed to be longer than this, but I don't want to drag too long, for it would still be a sad ending anyway.

I suck at writing kissing scenes and stuff so I had to refer to the almighty Google XD Hope you guys enjoy!

P.S, I'll be alternating between my current two stories for now, so the updates would take longer time 😊