ARNAV

Since I came back from Khushi's house, I couldn't sleep, I kept on tossing and turning on my bed trying o sleep but only if it was possible.

I couldn't forget the look on Shrey's face when he found out about us, it was so damn heartbreaking, and I hated that I was the one to make him feel that way, he was my best friend, I wasn't supposed to make him feel that way.

Only if there was a way I could change things, I definitely would, not that I regretted falling in love with Khushi, it was the best thing to have happened to me, it was just that she wasn't the right person because she was my best friend's wife.

I heard the doorbell ring and I sat up immediately wondering who it might be, it was almost midnight and no one really visited me.

I got up from my bed and headed to open the door, to my surprise, Shrey was standing right there, I knew he was going to come but I dint know it was going to be this soon.

Honestly, I dint even know how to face him, looking at him just made me feel guilty, I was the last person he would have thought to do something of this sort to him.

"Can I come in?" He asked, I just nodded and walked aside allowing him inside, he walked in and settled down on the couch in the hall silently, I closed the door and joined him.

"Shrey I..." I started to speak but he interrupted me.

"No Arnav, today I will speak and you will listen." He said, his voice sounded so strict.

I nodded and looked at him waiting for him to speak, he sat there silently for a while until he finally started talking.

"We've grown up together, from school to university to everything that happened in your life, I was always there, right by your side.

I was there when you fell in love, I was there when you got cheated on, I was there when no one else was Arnav, you were the only person who was important to me, I cared about you more than I cared for anyone else.

I saw how hurt you were when your marriage broke, I saw how you became bitter about marriages after it and so you were the last person I thought would ever do something like this to anyone, I was your best friend Arnav, all I deserved was you by my side always as a friend, I trusted you and that's why I left you behind to take care of my wife because I thought a person who had been cheated on wouldn't ever cheat on someone else, but you ended up doing just that!" He looked at me angrily.

"I dint cheat on you Shrey, I dint even touch her." I dint know how I was ever going to make him understand that.

"But you love her and she does too!" He shouted angrily.

"So many people out there love someone they can't be with, so many people get married to someone else when they are in love with someone else, that's not cheating, it's just destiny.

Look I dint wish for this to happen, do you think I forced myself into falling for her? it just happened Shrey, it was out of my control, but what was in my control was not to ever touch her because she was your wife and I made sure of that!

I know it was all wrong, but why don't you understand, if either of us had to cheat on you, we wouldn't have told you about this, this is different Shrey." I tried to explain myself.

"All I know is that you snatched my wife away Arnav, and I can't ever forgive you for that! Do you even have an idea what this is like? She says she's in love with the both of us, how do you even think that's possible? She's either in love with me or with you, and I don't want to know who she really is in love with.

You have no idea how difficult it is going to be, you ruined everything, I would never be able to look at her in the same way, she would never be able to look at me the same way, only because of you!"

"I am sorry Shrey, I dint mean to hurt you." I apologized.

"Your sorry isn't going to repair the damage you caused to my marriage Arnav!" he said angrily, I just sat silently not knowing what more to say.

"You know the three of us are involved in this mess, but you know who lost everything? Me! It wasn't even my fault and I lost everything. I lost my love, I lost my wife and I lost my best friend." He said sadly.

"Please don't say that Shrey, I'll do anything it takes to make things right, please tell me what I have to do to earn your forgiveness." I bent down on my knees and looked at him.

The last thing I wanted was to lose him, he was the only important person I had left in life, if I was going to lose him, life wasn't going to be worth living.

"I don't even know how to forgive you Arnav."

"Please Shrey, you are the only person I have, what am I going to do without you?"

"You should have thought of that before doing what you did to me Arnav. I would have forgiven you if I could but I can't Arnav, I can't!"

"So you'll just end our friendship because of a mistake I made?"

"That mistake was my wife Arnav!" He looked at me angrily, I dint have anything more to say, I dint know any other ways of making him understand or forgive me so I chose to stay silent.

He stood up and headed towards the door but stopped before leaving, he turned to look at me, I hadn't moved from the position I had been in.

"Do me a favor, if you ever considered me your friend, don't ever show me your face again because every time I'll see you, I'll remember your betrayal and I don't want to live with that." He walked away and maybe this was the last ever time I was going to see him, and it hurt worse than a heartbreak.

What did I really do to deserve this kind of a life? Why did I always end up losing the people I loved? Why was I the one to be punished always?

*****

I looked at my bags wondering where I was even going to go, after Shrey left last night, I couldn't sleep at all, neither could I stop thinking about everything that had happened, maybe it all was actually my fault.

He asked me never to show him my face again and so I decided to leave, I knew if I stayed here, it would just create more problems so I packed my stuff and got ready to leave, only that I dint know where else I was going to go.

I wasn't running away from the mess I had created, I was just trying to do what he had asked me to, maybe if I left, everything between him and Khushi would get back to normal with time so I thought it was the right thing to do.

Although I dint want to leave without saying goodbye to Khushi, I had to. I had no right to even go and see her, but then I loved her and she was already battling with cancer and now there was this another battle with Shrey, I couldn't just leave without seeing her.

Coincidentally, she had a chemo session at the hospital today so I decided to pass by and see her for one last time before I left.

I stood outside the door of her room while Shrey was busy having some discussion with Aria in her office, I peeped inside and saw her seated on the bed.

She looked lost and sad, I wanted to go inside and talk to her or even cheer her up but I knew it wouldn't be the right thing to do so I just stayed outside and kept on looking at her hoping that's he was going to get through this and that one day she was going to win this fight against cancer.

I saw Shrey and Aria heading towards her room so I quickly hid myself, they both walked inside and I turned around to leave.

"Arnav!" I heard someone call me, I turned around and saw Aria standing there.

"I was just leaving, don't tell anyone I was here." I said to her hoping she wasn't going to tell Shrey or Khushi because it would just make things worse.

"I saw you hiding Arnav, I know you dint want Shrey to see you, but why?" she asked.

"I can't really explain it, anyway how is Khushi doing? Is she going to be fine?" I asked.

"Maybe, with cancer you can never be sure if the patient is going to survive or not, you just have to pray and hope things go well." She said.

"Please do all you can to help her. Anyway I'll take your leave, it was nice meeting you Aria." I smiled faintly at her.

"Why are you talking like it's the last time we're meeting?" she looked at me curiously.

"Because it is the last time." I turned around and walked away from the two most important people in my life knowing I wasn't ever going to see them again.