Thursday Morning

October 24, 2019

"An intervention?" I question as I look up at my friends. Gwen and Steven have ambushed me on my way to homeroom and refuse to leave me alone no matter how much I ask. They seem intent on the exact opposite happening.

"Not just any intervention. It's the 'Torture and Reveal' intervention." Gwen corrects and I raise an eyebrow in question not sure if I'm mentally, or apparently physically, ready for the explanation behind the name. I look towards Steven.

"And you're okay with this?" I ask him and despite the nod, I can see the worry in his light brown eyes. I sigh and relent because maybe this isn't such a bad idea despite my own thoughts on the matter which I'm sure are just bitter from lack of sleep. I can't get over what Seth had said to me last night. "Car?" Steven's voice pulls me from my thoughts and I blink before refocusing back on his steady gaze. "You alright?" He questions his eyes traveling between my face and where my right-hand runs over my sleeved arm. I stop and pull my hand away.

"So, intervention?" I change the subject not able to lie and not yet ready for the aftermath of telling the truth.

***

Thursday Evening

We all pile into Gwen's extravagant house giddy for a sleepover because, despite it being meant for an intervention, we haven't gotten the gang altogether for a large slumber party in months. Each of our lives has become full of other commitments and agendas and, while it's sad it's also just life, so none of us can say much on the matter.

I camp out on the couch flipping through the gaming magazines Gwen's brother subscribes to as I wait for her to return with popcorn. Steven flips through some of the television channels though the moment we hear Gwen descend the stairs we come to attention like a couple of military soldiers. We lock eyes, the thought flashes through both our minds and we snicker.

"Alright, intervention 'Torture and Reveal' is now underway!" Gwen declares as she drops down onto the air mattress sitting parallel from Steven. I reach over and grab a handful of popcorn.

"Is the torture part really necessary?"

"Yes." Gwen answers so matter-of-factly it's almost comical and I find it difficult not to chuckle.

"Why?" Steven reaches for the popcorn this time as he asks his question but Gwen bats his hand away shooting our childhood friend a Cheshire's grin. My lips twitch upwards in a smile at the go-between.

"Boys who skip practice don't eat such unhealthy snacks and it gives it pizzaz." She retorts and Steven rolls his eyes as he reaches for the popcorn once more. Rather than just going for a handful, though he snatches the entire bowl from Gwen, smirking at the victory.

"Need I remind you who's making me skip football practice?" He quips and I chuckle as I watch him toss a few pieces of popcorn into his mouth. Gwen is less than amused. She snatches her bowl back from Steven grumbling about football players and just where they could stuff the ball. I almost lose it at that but manage to keep it together. It's Steven who gets serious first. "So, intervention. Who wants to go first?"

I slink down into the couch, not wanting the honor whatsoever. Steven's eyes roam over both Gwen and I though none of us speaks up after the question. We sit in silence, confined to our own thoughts as we think about what we'd even say.

What can I say?

I question.

Everything that's happened with mom? But they already know about that. Everything with Seth? That's hardly my place. All the stuff that's happened with me?

I give my head a quick shake. Before I wasn't too worried about this whole intervention thing but now I can feel my fears rising to the surface at the thought of what Gwen and Steven might think of me after I tell them everything.

Will they see me differently? Will they hate me?

The thought strikes fear into my heart and I begin pulling on my right lobe for comfort when Gwen speaks up, "I'm moving." It comes so fast that it silence my thoughts. I press my lips into a straight line as my gaze shifts to Steven.

"What?!" He looks towards me but I can only look away unable to offer him the answers he wants. "Since when? How soon? To where? Why am I only just now hearing about this?!" The anger in my childhood friend's voice is clear as day but it's not what stings the most. It's the betrayal I here in it and, based on the flicker of sadness across Gwen's features it stabs her just as deep.

"You seemed busy with your own shit going on ya know? I didn't want to stress you out."

"Then how come Carmen knows?!" Steven growls, tossing his hand out in my direction. I flinch away at the heated tone. Steven tosses me an apologetic look. "Sorry Car." He said, reeling his anger in. "I didn't mean to raise my voice."

I shake my head and offer him the best reassuring smile I can muster in the current situation. "It's alright. I just kind of stumbled onto it, ya know. I've got pretty good intuition." At that Steven turns his attention back towards Gwen waiting for her to answer each of his questions. She sighs and replies,

"My parents told me about it last week. We'll be moving at the end of November to New York City. My dad got a job transfer to the large firm located there." Her voice sounds robotic as she recites the same words she'd told me when I'd asked the same questions. My heart goes out to my childhood friend because hearing it the second time around doesn't make it hurt any less.

"Jesus, that gives us a little more than a month."

I glance towards Steven who's stricken by this realization, the wheels turning in his head as he processes everything he's just learned.

"I told them that I didn't want to go. That I could stay here but they were against it." Gwen barks out a bitter laugh and my shoulders sag forward. "Believe me I fought tooth and nail against it but then I realized something." The tone in Gwen's voice draws my eyes towards her. This part I'd had yet to hear about. I lean forward and wait for her to continue. "I'm okay with moving."

My eyes widen at the confession and even Steven is caught off guard by it, opening his mouth the speak only to be cut off by Gwen. "I mean, I'm not happy to be leaving you two so soon. It sucks and it hurts like I'm losing a part of myself but I'm okay with leaving this town. That was always the plan one way or another so I knew we weren't going to be together forever and this just speeds things up a bit but I'm okay with it because I'm ready to get out there and see the world." Gwen finishes her sentence breathless and my heart cries out and breaks for my friend as I watch the teardrops, one by one travel down her face.

"Aw, Gwen," I call out to her as I clamor from the couch and to the air mattress, pulling her into my arms and rocking us both back and forth. She cries against my chest though her voice is low and soft, nothing like mine when I cry. It's clear that the words she'd spoken are true. She'd looked so sure of herself it's hard to think otherwise and knowing that makes the words I'd been sick to think about leaving my mouth with ease, "Seth called me out on my cutting." The words are out before I can back down and both of my friends look at me with wide eyes.

"He what?!"

"That piece of shit, I'll kill him!" It's Steven that speaks these words and he makes to get up sending my worry into overdrive as I shake my head.

"No, no, no, no." I chant the singular word in a mad dash as I reach out and clamp onto Steven's arm, holding on for dear life.

"Why the hell not? Let him go. Take your asshole jock friends with you and wipe the floor with Mop Head. If you won't I will." Gwen said and I shoot her a dirty look.

"No, really, it's okay guys."

"That's not okay!" Gwen and Steven bellow in unison causing me to flinch back from both of them. There's a reason no one at school messes with either of them and this right here is that reason. Steven's eyes bore into mine as he continues,

"It's the exact opposite of okay. I thought things were going good with you guys. What happened?" His eyes and tone of voice both demand answers from me and I have to look away as I begin rubbing my hands up and down my sleeved arms where I know numerous scars lie. The events from the previous night replay in my thoughts once more.

"It's just, I made him really angry because I got really angry and he didn't mean what he said, I know he didn't but I just got upset over it and-" I chatter on until I feel my own tears begin to flow down my cheeks and my words become a jumbled mess of nonsense. Gwen and I switch positions and I feel Steven's hand run up and down my back for comfort, both of them losing the edge to their anger. A few minutes pass before I collect myself enough to say, "Seth hurts himself too." The room goes still at the bomb I drop until I hear Gwen murmur,

"Shit." She breathes out a shaky breath and I grip onto her tighter.

"He-he hurts himself and I should have known, you know. I should have realized and I didn't and I'm just the worst person in the world for not realizing it." I blather on.

"No, you're not." Steven is quick to speak up silencing the emotions I'd kept bottled up. "There's no way you could have known Car."

"But we've both been through it. If anyone should have known-"

"No. It's exactly because you know what he went through that you should also know if he wanted it hidden it was going to stay hidden." Gwen speaks up now. "How long did you keep us all in the dark about your situation?" Her question doesn't hold any type of malice or malicious intent but guilt still blossoms to life in my body. I have to look away from both of my friends, unable to answer the question.

"Exactly," Steven says. "You only stumbled onto this, didn't you? That's why there was such an argument. I'm sure he never wanted anyone to find out. Though, it doesn't give him the right to say whatever the hell he said to you. I'm sure you have no intention of telling us just what that is?"

I continue to stare a hole into the floor still unable to meet either of their gazes. When I hear one of them sigh I say, "Sorry."

"It's alright, chickadee," Gwen said. "I'm just glad you're okay. You're okay, right?" She asked and I finally look up at her before looking towards Steven and it's clear as day that they're both expecting my usual answer and, for a moment I almost give it to them but then I stop myself. My hands curl into tight fists at my side and my whole body becomes stiff as a board as I tell them the truth.

"No, I'm not." Everything around us seems to slow at my confession and it feels like I can breathe easy for the first time in a long time because my friends, my childhood friends finally know the truth. I'm not okay. I look towards Gwen and she smiles at me. I catch the message there in her dark blue eyes and my chest tightens with warmth.

It's okay to not be okay.

Out of the corner of my eye, I catch Steven breathing heavily and holding a hand over his heart. My worry sparks to life, my own confession being pushed to the side now as I give him attention. "Steven?" I question, concern in my voice. He looks from Gwen to I.

"Hey King, you alright?" Gwen asked and our friend shakes his head. I sit taller then because I have an inkling of knowledge about where this is going.

"No. No, I'm not either." He bites down hard on his bottom lip and I catch the sight of blood. From the panicked look in his eyes, it's clear that he's struggling to find the right words. My heart goes out to him, giving him all the support I know he needs. "I-I've been lying these past few years to everyone. To myself and I royally screwed up. I hate who I've become. I hate who I currently am. I thought I was playing this trick on everyone else, but I think I finally realized I'm the only one suffering from it." He pauses for a long second. "I-I-" There's another pause and I give my head a small nod and watch as Steven pulls in a deep breath, steadying himself before opening his eyes and saying, "I'm gay."

Gwen squeals in delight off to my right and I flinch pretty sure I'm now deaf in that ear. "Oh my god! You're dating Peter right?" She begins drilling Steven with question after question and he looks to me for some type of help. I reach out and rest a hand on Gwen's shoulder, pulling her back down to reality.

"Why don't we just let him finish talking first?" I suggest before looking back at Steven.

"Thanks." He takes another deep breath before continuing. "Peter and I aren't dating. We were never actually dating. We had some moments," His eyes get a far off look in them. "But that's all they were." The depressed tone in his voice has me reaching out and laying my hand over his for comfort.

"It's alright. We're here for you."

"I wish I could say the same about him. I was such an asshole, you guys don't even know." It's from there that Steven fills us in on everything that happened Monday morning and neither Gwen nor I can believe it.

"Oh, Steven."

"Man, what a dick move."

"Gwen!" I chastise, swatting at her arm. She doesn't let it phase her.

"What?! It's the truth. It was a dick move. I mean, I get why he did it but it doesn't make it any better." She looks towards Steven then. "You're in the wrong here my friend. You done messed up."

"We're supposed to be making him feel better." I hiss as I rub my hand up and down Steven's back for comfort.

"Hey, this is an intervention, not a cuddle party. Things get harsh, there's a reason it's called 'Torture and Reveal'." Gwen states matt-of-fact and I just roll my eyes not warranting it a response. She continues on. "But fear not, my dear friend." Steven and I both look at her now. "I think we can help you get your beau back."

A/N: Everything's come out in the open now and everyone is finally on the same playing field. The next chapter will be the last so look forward to the ending! If you enjoyed this chapter or are enjoying the story thus far don't forget to vote and drop a comment below! I love hearing from you.