The Meeting

Sameer Maheshwari 10th June 1990

I saw her for the first time today. Her hair danced in the wind while her red uniform fluttered across her knees while slow pedalled her blue bike uphill towards St Marys. That's the school across from ours. While ours is a boarding, it's a day boarding for girls. All the guys in my class are often swooning over the girls there but I never really paid attention since I never bothered. But today while we boys were out on a walk around the school grounds and were longingly looking outside the school gates while the guards shot us murderous glares, I noticed for the first time and I don't know as to what struck me but I smiled and I don't know whether it's the figment of my imagination but it felt like she smiled too. Her cheeks tinted red while she did so. It was more like a blink and miss yet the moment seemed special. While I prepare to go to bed since the warden is out on his round and soon it is to be lights out, I cant stop wondering about the girl from St Marys. Yeah, I just christened her as the girl and now when I close my eyes I see her and that smile. Whats with me?! A girl cannot be having such effect on me, I guess its just the fixation that comes with teenage. Its better I sleep, anyways I have rambled enough for today.

Naina Agarwal 10th June 1990

Wait did he just smile at me? For a while my heartrate had accelerated and I lost my balance even though I never showed and somehow managed. The guy with the silky hair. My friends often spoke of him, he was apparently the headboy and much in demand around girls though seldom would spare a glance at anyone. And that very guy had actually smiled at me. When his eyes met mine something went off kilter yet everything synchronized like some melody and I could actually hear music is the background. I think Naina Agarwal you need to stop watching those romantic films. Your mind seems to have gone into an overdrive and you seem to have lost your footing with reality. Just stop and sleep now or else taiji would come barelling into the room complaining about how you have kept so many lights on while you are sitting like a slob and daydreaming. After all electricity doesn't run on water, not in my words but taijis . time for lights out. Goodnight

Sameer Maheshwari 1st December 1990

Our school is soon to close down for winter break but somewhere the thought of going back home makes me melancholy not only because home was never home. I would have go live with my step father and his family and spend the excruciating 2 months in their company but also because I wouldn't get to see the girl from st marys. Since that crisp afternoon in June I have been watching her and now its like an addiction. Everytime the last bell rings I literally scamper off leaving my things in a wide disarray while I scurry to my usual post in front of the gate just to catch a glimpse of her. I know she realizes that I watch her since it feels like her cheeks go red and her eyes wouldn't meet mine, downcast all the while she slow pedaled, it felt like she took her time while she did so. Today I had incident with Rahul from my class at the very moment. While I was lost in her, I heard someone hooting and whistling in the background. My blood boiled the very instant and when I turned I saw Rahul with his beady eyes eyeing the girl from St Mary's. he didn't stop at that, while his eyes shamelessly roamed across her skin, he also had to comment that she had great legs and he wondered as to what would she feel like to take into his arms. I couldn't stop myself, in an instant I was at his side, punching his face from all sides. The guards literally had to wrench me off him or else I would have killed him. "whats with you Maheshwari ?" he had screamed while I simply glared at him and said " dare you look at her again, she is mine. Do you understand that!" at that moment it had felt natural to be possessive about her, that her being was only for me to watch, I couldn't tolerate the lewd remarks and it felt so personal. But now in private when I contemplate over the same, am flustered at my own reaction, why on earth?! She is just a girl passing my school grounds, ya may be I fancy her. May be it's an infatuation that I have developed that will pass with time. Better not to dwell on it. Yet she refused to leave my thoughts.

Sameer Maheshwari 7th April 1991

Turns out it was never an infatuation. All through my winter break I dreamt of her. Sometimes she would be falling off her bike while I rushed to save her from the bad fall or we would be sitting together in one of the open air cafes at mall road, sipping onto our goldspots while she would go red and me I would be tongue tied for words. Or in another scenario where we are both dressed in white and am twirling her while we are engaged in a ballroom dance. I keep twirling her until she is dizzy and falls into my arms and everytime my dream would break just at the point. Her big eyes staring into mine in shock while my lips curled into a naughty and mischievous smile. Initially the dreams seemed silly and I would simply brush them off thinking it to be my figment of imagination. But the more I dwelled on the question as to why and what stemmed these imagination and why would I be getting such recurrent dreams. When I joined the dots I knew I was in trouble and at the very moment prem rog prem rog song started playing on the tv. My step sister Deepika happens to be a chitrahaar buff and and hence I got my answer. When I told my friends they laughed it off saying, its all hormonal, referring to the chapter called reproduction in our bio book they had to say it is all connected to my hormones and what I am feeling is just my body conveying its ever changing desires and needs. I had gone pink at the mention since, though I had dreamed of her and still get those dreams yet none of them had anything to do with urges or desires. Iliterally seethed at their theories and had gone incommunicado for days. All I wanted was to see her and now the desire to know her was palpable. All of this while we still continue with our ritual of seeing each other outside the school gates. She on her bike while me leaning against the heavy iron gates. Now our gazes would meet and often we waved at one another. We had graduated from the surreptitious glances to waving. Wow what a progress! I had to talk to her now. Its now or never!

Sameer Maheshwari 12th April 1996

I am being paraded across plush delhi homes and ask why? My mother is seeking my bride. She wants me married asap. Rather if she can get hold of someone who suits her criteria she might even get me married tomorrow or this very instant. But my mind is else where. I am lost in the past, the days of nainital haunt me and so does that smile, those strands of hair that danced in the wind and kissed her cheeks every so lightly while she made her way to her school across from mine. Where is she now? What is she doing now ? does she remember me? Because I remember her still. She is like the blood to my viens, every gust of wind I seek her sweet smell but alas! Its long lost. I never got around to speak to her. All I did was gaze, or just wave. Every day would pass and everyday I would try and muster some courage to speak with her or just say a hello. Even when her school was invited for our annual fest and she was there to represent her school, I couldn't take those steps and speak with her. She waited, I could see it in her eyes, as beckoning me to come forward. But I just couldn't move, but legs were glued to the spot and my mouth hanging open at her sight while my eyes never left hers. She looked ethereal in that pink salwar suit. She took part in the eastern dance competition and when she danced it looked so effortless, her every move was grace and elegance personified. I was enchanted and that laughter when she won the trophy was like music to my ears. Yet I couldn't approach her, her disappointment was palpable. And she kept turning back even when she was walking out of the gates after tge end of the program. I cursed myself and on the flight back home kept on sulking while my mother looked on confused at my anger. I was angry at my stupidity but then it was already too late. Ours school was over officially before our boards and now we were to go back only for our papers and I had lost chance to meet the girl of my dreams. But she never left my thoughts. Even when I passed my boards with flying colours and went to the top engineering college to study civil engineering and now that I was employed with the Indian Army, she still haunts me in my dreams with her smile. And ever since the talks of marriage, it feels like she is the one for me and hence all the girls I meet, I simply reject without even sparing a second glance. They all are insignificant to me. My eyes seek my girl from St Marys.

Sameer Maheshwari 12th April 1996

No way! No way! Was I actually seeing her. Dressed in pink chiffon saree walking towards me with a tray of tea and refreshments. Her eyes still downcast, she seemed to have lost all the baby fat from school and her slender waist peeped through the fabric that made me gulp the water in one go. She wouldn't look at me at first. Sat there like a demure bride with her hands folded on thighs. She seemed nervous while her aunt chanted on about her qualities but I was already taken. My mother could tell that and she requested for us to have some private time in a room where we could talk. But her taiji objected. Apparently theres is an orthodox set up and they cant just let their daughter out of their sight alone that too with a stranger in a room even when its at the pretext for marriage. Hence we reluctantly agreed to talk in the company of her sister Preeti. She is to be our chaperone. For the first time I came to know of her name. Naina, it felt like magic across my tongue, I kept on mumbling it on while I followed her into a room. Three chairs were set up. Mine opposite hers while a chair in between for respectable distance. In my mind and heart, she was already to be mine. My wife but yes before that we had to go through this formality and even had to make her look at me. How do I do that? I cleared my throat a good 10 times but to no avail and this time I didn't keep quite I even asked her about her hobbies but then too she wouldn't budge. Rather her sister the chatterbox Preeti rambled on about her prowess as a classical dancer and how in school she had won several prizes for debates and even quiz competitions. Wow! That's the first word that slipped through my lips while I also inadvertently blurted out "wow, I never knew you were so talented and multifaceted when I first saw you pedaling your way to school" and that was the moment she looked up, first her eyes became big in shock and when she realized it was me she was looking at after all those years , she smiled and whispered, "love found its way" and I got my answer without her speaking anymore and I never felt the urge to ask anymore questions. In all of this Preeti looked on confused and we exchanged a long meaningful stare. That very day we had our Roka. And panditji was even called into decide on a desired date of marriage. And we were to be married at the earliest possible date which was 12 days from today. 24th of April. I winked at her when no one was looking while she shied away.