One Year Earlier ...

June 1993

Harlem, NYC

"I live and die for Hip Hop This is Hip Hop of today I give props to Hip Hop So Hip Hop hooray...ho... hey...ho! ... And that was Naughty By Nature's, Hip-Hop Hooray, ayo Treach! when you coming back to show some Love man? Ha-ha, was sup New York City, this is DJ Mellie Mel on the one's and two's and today is the perfect day for hitting the courts, checking out the fly honey's and crashing somebodies BBQ, ayo. I'll be right back after I spin this tune, 2Pac's I get around. And Y'all listening to Power 105.1 keep it G out here Y'all"

I bobbed my head with my eyes close as I laid on the bed, listening to 2pac rhymes come through my speaker of my room. I was in my zone but if I knew that it would end so soon I would have been gotten my ass up.

"Eric...Eric. ERIC!" I heard my sister shout as my room door swung open.

My eyes popped open as I sat up to see my younger sister standing in the doorway with her arms folded, leaning her weight on her left leg. I frowned as I seen the top of her hair in a fuzzy bun and some long thick braids that rested on her shoulder.

"What I tell you 'bout that shit?" I swung my legs around, placing my feet on the blue plush carpet I laid down on the floor at the food of my bed in my room. I hated the feeling of these cold, hard ass project floors. "Bussin in my room and shit, what you want Kyra?"

"Oh please, mama said get up and go to the store. We need some milk she baking a cake" Kyra said.

I sucked my teeth and looked her up and down, "Why can't you go?"

Kyra pointed to the top of her head, "You see my hair? Ain't nobody checking for me looking like this E".

I stood up and walked towards her chuckling, "Aint nobody checkin for you now".

I felt her mush the back of my head as I walked down the narrow hall way to the kitchen.

I stayed in Frederick Douglass Projects on the upper west side of Harlem. My family and I moved out here from Compton when I finished my first year of elementary school because my pops accepted a new position with his job as a post master. I aint gonna lie, I miss Compton but I've grown to love New York.

I was about eleven years old when I started middle school here, MS247.  When I first got here, I used to get clowned everyday cause of my accent, my high-pitched voice due to my bronchitis and last, my height.

I had to prove myself at a young age to these New York niggas or get ganked every day for my shit or beat up, sometimes both. I had to go hard cause I was a short nigga. Short doesn't equal weak and these niggas found that out quick. I shut all that shit down when I knock the fuck out of this kid, Ron in the front of the school shortly after dismissal.

He was a bigger, taller, real ugly fat nigga who stayed with ashy ass hands and he stayed in the next building from me. I aint see him much around the hood since I didn't go outside, but he made up for it at school.  He wanted to show off in front of his little punk ass clique, trying to push me around and shit. This was the same day I met my homie, Quan. I remember that day like it was yesterday:

|Flashback| 

I grabbed my backpack and started to walk through the double doors, exiting my school. It was a cold day in the city and I just wanted to get home of course, after I walked next door and got Kyra from school. Kyra and I was two years apart, so I had to watch over her.

I started going down the steps and I felt my book bag get grabbed, causing me to fall backwards on the hard steps. I scrunched my face up in pain and looked up and seen Ron, the 7th grade bully standing over me and his bitch ass posse, laughing.

"Get the fuck up lil bitch" He laughed as his two friends pulled me up, both on the sides of me and holding my arms on my raiders jacket.

This was my favorite jacket, my dad got me this as a gift for making honor roll in school.

"Come on man, I just wanna go home" I told him.

I didn't have the patience for this shit today. I never bothered anyone, I did my work and went home but, I always found myself always getting fucked with by this nigga. He let out the ugliest laugh and pushed me as his friends pushed me forward like we were playing monkey in the middle.

"You a short ugly lil nigga" Ron laughed.

"Word son, nigga hair looks like a Spanish bitch pussy hair" his friend, Tyshawn chuckled and smacked the back of my head with his free hand as his other hand held my arm.

"Come on man, I don't want no problems" I said lowly as I looked down at the ground. "Why Y'all always fucking with me?"

They didn't even answer me. They kept taunting me, holding me hostage and pushing me. I felt tears form in the rim of my eyes not because I was scared, but because I was angry at how much of a pussy I felt like.

I looked and seen a group of guys around my age. One of their names were Quan. I had PE with him so I knew who he was. He was popular in school. Real cool, calm kid and real wise.

We were eleven, but this kid had the mindset of a twenty-one-year-old.  His eyes met mine as he walked down the steps with two guys trailing closely. I looked at his feet and seen he had the new pair of Black and White Nike Blazers on his feet. Kid was fly.

"Ayo Ron, leave em alone man" Quan said as he walked up to Ron.

Ron waved Quan off as he snatched my LA sox hat off my head. That's all it took for me to break free. I jumped up and down as he held it up in the air with one hand and laughing.

"Jump little nigga jump!" he teased.

"Yo Ron, chill give him his shit back man you bugging. When he snuffs you don't say nothing nigga" Quan warned.

Ron turned his attention to Quan while laughing, "Yeah right this nigga not built like th...- "

His sentence was cut short as I pulled back and gave him the hardest punch to his face, causing him to fall on the concrete steps. I climbed on top of him and kept punching him. All these punches came from the anger I had bottled every day as I got bullied by this ugly nigga. I was in the zone as I tried to choke this kid as I said every cuss word invented. His man's couldn't get me off him.

"This nigga is crazy!" Tyshawn screamed as he tried to grab me off Ron.

I turned around and pushed Tyshawn to the ground, "Fuck off me nigga"

"Ayoo lil homie chill god!" Quan yelled as he grabbed me off top of Ron.

I shook myself off as I grabbed my hat back and placed it back on my head. My chest heaved up and down as I felt the adrenaline rush through my veins.

"Stop fucking with me nigga!", I screamed at the top of my lungs and walked away from those niggas.

I heard Quan jog lightly behind me, "Yoo, for a little nigga you hold it down son for real"

I eyed Quan up and down as he reached out for a dap. I dapped him back and just like that, we became the best of friends.

| End of Flashback |

-----

I see my mom sitting at the table in the kitchen wearing her night gown, writing on a piece of paper. Fuck, a grocery list, I thought to myself. I smiled while walking over to my mom, kissing her cheek.

"Hey mama"

"Hey baby, I need you to go to the store. I'm baking a cake for your dad"

"Yeah ill go", I shrugged my shoulders. Not like I really had a choice.

My mom handed me the list and slid me a twenty-dollar bill, "Thanks baby, get yourself something"

I nodded as I slipped the bill in my pocket. I walked to the house door and decided to take the stairwell. We only lived on the fourth floor so it wasn't that bad of a jog down the steps. I leaned on the button to unlock the lobby door and was immediately burned by the sun that beamed down on my face.

There were kids running through the sprinklers as some of them chased each other with water guns and water balloons, some older cats sat at the card tables with 40 bottles, a deck of cards and cigars cursing at each other as they played cards.

I greeted some of the older women that sat in front the building with their grocery carts as they talked about church, their blood pressure and other shit. As I walked down the hill going to the supermarket, I seen my homie that was from around the way. I dapped him up as we greeted each other.

"Waddup Cas" my homie Los said to me.

"Aint shit, moms got me going to the store and shit, you know how that go"

He laughed and nodded his head, "Yeah I know"

I stared at Los for a split second. He was a tall lanky dude with a head full of long hair and light skinned. I always told him for a pretty boy he hold it down. This kid ways always strapped and had no problem putting lead in a nigga.

"You know who you look like?" I smirked.

Los squinted his eyes due to the sun, "Nah, who man?"

"That nigga Layzie from Bone thugs" I laughed.

Los made a face then shared a laugh with me, "Maann, if somebody say that shit one mo' time bro"

Our laughter was interrupted as we watched a red BMW with the top down pull up. I admired the paint on the car as my eyes scanned it. This shit was nice as hell. My eyes lit up as I seen who was sitting in the drivers seat, making me place my fist up to my mouth as I let out a laugh.

"Ohhh shit! waddup Tone"

Tony was my nigga that I met when I was selling little nickel and dime bags with my man Quan. He stayed near Morningside Heights but was always over here chilling since his baby moms stay in the next building from me. She was a hoe, easy access type of bitch and I think Tony knew that but only tolerated her for the sake of his baby girl.

"Waddup Cas nigga...you good baby?"

He dapped me up as we shared a brotherly hug. This nigga Tony always been a flashy nigga fuck bitches and get money, it's a Harlem nigga mentality. I walked over to his ride and pointed, still laughing in shock;

"This-this you nigga?"

Tony placed his hands in his Jeans pocket, displaying a smile, "yeah man that's me man"

I was so caught up in Tony ride I forgot that Los was standing there.

"Look at you being all humble and shit...My bad man, Los this my nigga Tony"

Tony gave Los a head nod and dapped him up. Los nodded and watched me as I admire the beamer right before my eyes.

"Shit nice man" Los said and smiled while pulling a black and mild of his pocket, loosening it up.

Tony smirked in Los direction, "yeah... thanks man"

"Yo Cas, Ima holla at you nigga" Los gave me the head nod and started walking away towards the hood.

"Aight Los".

I watched Tony walk over to his whip and lean on the front hood of the car. This nigga was making moves. I knew he was selling drugs, but aint no nickel and dime weed was bringing in this type of money, referring to this beamer he just pulled up on the block in.

Tony smiled as he crossed his right foot over his left, "So wassup Cas man, how you living on ya block?

"Its aight nigga, I see how you living" I grinned. " Put a nigga on"

I needed the word on what he doing and how can I get in on this paper trail. It's time I start making some real bread. I did this drug game shit before as a lil nigga in high school, selling some small time weed, just enough to stunt, buy clothes and front for bitches, but now I need the bread to escape the projects.

Tony looked around as he smirked, "Come take a ride with me"

He hopped in the driver seat and leaned over to open the passenger door for me. I climbed and admired the cream color seats he had in his ride. There wasn't even a speck of lent on his carpet. He slowly pulled off into the traffic. I don't know where he taking me, but we gotta stop by the store, I aint tryna have mama love sound off on me.

I'm not getting any younger. I'm still a young nigga tryna eat on these streets. I aint built for a 9 to 5 job five days a week working for someone else and taking orders on a bullshit ass job, when I can start my own business and be my own boss.

Whatever Tony doing, it's treating him good, and I want parts of it. All of it.

[A/N: I noticed that I get more views than votes and comments, i think i got some lurkers👀 on the low Ouuuuuuuu (Young M.A Voice) but to those who really do engage with me I appreciate it cause writing is a skill that I enjoy and can be sensitive about. Much Love to y'all 🎔

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