Chapter 31 - You Got Me

"When the fear takes you down

When the doubt takes you under

When you sink like a stone

And you can't breathe

When the tears take control

When the demons take over

Won't be in this alone

You got me"

New Year's Eve. Everyone was preparing themselves to party, whether it was with family, friends, alone, at home, at the beach, anywhere. My parents, I, Dylan, Tracy, Roxy and Lori and their parents had this tradition of going together to the cafés near the town river. We just usually sit at the tables, talking, and at midnight we watched the firework.

This year it wouldn't be different. We would eat pizza and then go to the café, waiting for 2015 with bright smiles on our faces. Nothing would be different when it came to that, well, except for the part where Ellie, Cameron, and Rayla would be joining us. However, that wasn't really what was different this year. What was different was within me, having experienced a situation that opened my eyes to the real meaning of judging others and the real meaning of love, even though I still didn't quite know what that meant.

I would probably only know when I felt it.

So, there we were, a group of almost twenty people gathered in the pizza restaurant, laughing. I was really enjoying myself, after all, I was having fun with the people I loved the most.

Almost everyone in town gathered around the river, because it was the place where the fireworks were bigger, brighter, better. So maybe, just maybe, I was hoping to find Aiden, and even Matthew there.

Aiden and I had texted each other a couple of times but I hadn't heard of Matthew since the day I had told them everything. He was still angry at me, but I wasn't going to apologize again, not only because of my pride but mainly because I really believed I had nothing to be sorry about anymore. Sure, I had made mistakes, and I regretted hurting him, but he had done the same thing to me and I wasn't mad at him, not anymore. Yet he was still mad at me.

After eating in the restaurant, which was already near the river, we started walking on the river's edge, enjoying the cold breeze. It kinda sucked being one of the last countries in the world to enter the new year, and I always dreamed of passing New Year's Eve in big cities such as London, Sydney, even New York.

We all sat at round tables in one of the café's terrace, the adults in two tables and us, youngsters, in other two. There were some other students from our school and even from rowing around us.

"Can't believe we're almost in 2015." Lori smiled, her hands intertwined with Cameron's. Their relationship had quickly blossomed and it was really cute to see them interact with each other. It made me believe in true love. 

"I know, right?" Ellie agreed. Shortly after the jet black-haired boy who had greeted Roxy at Ellie's barbecue arrived. His name was Tyler, and he was actually very nice. He and Roxy had started dating not long ago.

"Kiara." Ellie called my name. "See? We're the only ones without a boyfriend." She didn't say it sadly, rather amusingly.

"I know." I smiled, sendind a teasing smile to Dylan and Rayla, who were both red as tomatoes.

"We're not..." They both said at the same time but Ellie winked and I smirked.

"Don't tell no lies, lie lie lie..." Ellie started singing and I soon joined her "You can't deny-ny-ny-ny..."

"Oh, shut it." Dylan said with a smile on his face. I heard a 'beep' coming from my pocket and I pulled my phone out, checking the screen. 'Look behind you.', it said. I did as the message told me and saw Aiden standing there, his hands shoved in his pockets, his leather jacket swung over his shoulders, a playful smirk on his lips. Typical Aiden that I had grown to like.

Seeing him like that made me finally realize I didn't hate him, I didn't even dislike him. So I got out of my chair and walked towards him, pulling him into a quick hug. He seemed surprised at first but rapidly hugged me back.

"Hey." He whispered in my ear, but it didn't send me shivers like it would have before. We were friends, and I liked that.

"Hi." I pulled back from the hug. "Do you wanna hang out with us?"

"As much as I would like to accept that, I'm pretty sure your friends don't really enjoy my company. Also, I can't leave my dudes waiting."

"I see. Gonna get drunk and hit on some girls?" I smirked.

"The first part you bet. The second... you taught me better." Aiden winked. "Anyway, I'm going to hang around here so I'll see ya."

"Kay. Happy New Year." I told him and after seeing him leaving to meet his friends I turned around, facing a group of wide-eyed people staring at me.

"What?" I bluntly asked, sitting on my chair between Dylan and Ellie.

"Didn't know you were friends with Aiden." Dylan said.

"And by the way..." Lori started. "He is so ho—" She stopped talking once she noticed Cameron crossing his arms over his chest and looking at her with a disapproval look on his face.

"... Horrendous." She ended up saying and Cameron grinned, putting one arm around Lori's shoulders and giving her a peck on the cheek. 

"That's better." He declared, and Lori grabbed his face and kissed him furiously on the lips. 

"No, this is better." Lori retorted. Ellie cleared her throat to get their attention. 

"Sorry."  They both sheepishly said.

"I've solved things out with him." I stated quietly after Lori and Cameron finished their public display of affection that we were all getting used to. 

"Solved? What happened between you and Aiden that needed to be solved?" Ellie inquired. Of course she wanted to know.

"As you know, we weren't friends, actually we hated each other's faces. But... he kinda helped me in that camping trip when the cable car system broke down and I was having a panic attack due to my fear of heights and I've realized he is not just a bad boy."

Ellie eyed me suspiciously but then a shy smile crept onto her lips.

"Does he have a girlfriend? I know he's the player type and that you don't like the idea of me being with him, but I haven't seen him with any girl lately and now you're friends so..."

"He doesn't have a girlfriend, and he isn't that player anymore." I responded. The idea of Ellie dating Aiden didn't seem as bad as it had seemed in the past. "Maybe you should talk to him, see underneath the surface. I did that... and was brightly surprised."

Ellie nodded and I smiled. If not long time ago I would hate the idea of seeing one of my best friends with a guy like Aiden, now I didn't mind, because he was different. Ellie didn't need to know he was different because of me.

At around 9.30 pm, more people started to arrive at the river's edge and I went inside the café to ask for one more Coca-cola. As soon as I ordered and got the soda, I turned around and found James behind me, wearing a blue hoodie and texting on his phone. He hadn't noticed me yet.

"Hello." I greeted and he raised his head and looked at me.

"Kiara. I was wondering where you were since I saw all your friends out there." James said as a greeting. I was surprised that he had noticed my absence. 

"Thinking about me?" I teased and he raised his eyebrows at me, then asking for a Pepsi to the cashier. After he got the soda and paid, we got out of the queue and he finally spoke.

"I didn't know you were that cocky." He declared, playing with the Pespi on his hands.

"What do you thought I was then?"

"Hm, let me see..." James sat on a table inside the café and I sat across from him, not really minding sitting with him and leaving my friends outside. I knew they would be having fun anyway. The couples were probably all dreamly staring at each other and Ellie was probably in la la land thinking about Aiden. "Sarcastic. Observant. Competitive. Independent. Not shy but not outgoing either. So not cocky. What about me?"

Woow. I didn't imagine he would say so many nice things about me. 

"Definitely cocky." I smirked. I was doing that a lot lately, but it's not like I could control the influence Matthew and Aiden had over me, even though it was only in a friendly way. "And competitive and independent and also witty, I guess."

James seemed pleased by my answer but his face then turned serious. He opened his Pepsi and eyed me while drinking it.

"Have you solved things out with those two guys who got in a fight with you?" He questioned. I narrowed my eyes.

"How do you— oh." I remembered telling James about Matthew and Aiden's fight in that November day when I went to the beach and saw Andrea breaking up with James. I was actually stunned that he still remembered that.  

"With one of them yes. I'm friends with Aiden now. With the other, Matthew... not so much. He's mad at me but I don't want to say sorry."

"I forgot to mention you're also a very proud person." James beamed.

"Indeed I am. I don't really know what I can say to him other than what I already told him to make him forgive me. It's up to him now, it's his choice if he wants to be my friend or not."

"I don't see how anyone wouldn't like to be friends with you." After hearing those words coming from James' mouth, I almost spilled my Coca-cola all over the table. Before I could answer though, I noticed Ellie entering the café and looking around, searching for someone. She raised an eyebrow once she saw me but gave me a thumbs up and a wink. James' back was facing her so they couldn't see each other but when he noticed me staring at her, he looked over his shoulder and I saw her eyes widening a bit, recognizing who he was. After James turned to me again, Ellie gave me both thumbs up and got out of the café. She had probably come just to check on me, which made me happy for how good and caring my friends were.

"Wasn't that Ellie Abrams?" James interrogated and I nodded. "She's a good rower. Not as a good as you though."

I suddenly looked away, not really knowing how to react.

"Thanks." I ended up saying. "And thanks for saying that you don't know how anyone wouldn't like to be friends with me." I felt silly thanking him but I just felt the need to do so anyway. James shrugged.

"I only stated the truth. And I say it from the perspective of someone who had you as a rival all these years, a rival and only that. Maybe we should had tried being friends earlier. But I guess you had to watch me being dumped for the first time in order for us to become friends, right?" James had a teasingly smile on his face and I laughed.

"Andrea was the first girl to break up with you?"

"Yes."

A half smile crept onto my lips. "I don't know how other girls didn't break up with you before, I mean..."

"Hey!" James exclaimed, putting a hand on his chest. "That hurt. And besides, she was my first girlfriend."

"Really?" I asked, surprised by what he had just said.

"Yeah..." He passed a hand through his hair, messing it a bit. His cheeks were slowly turning red and I thought it was cute that such thing embarrassed him. "Well, she was my first real girlfriend. I had had some crushes over the years but nothing serious. And she was my first serious relationship. Yet I can't say we were exactly serious, because neither of us wanted commitments and we just enjoyed being reckless, I guess."

"Well, you don't have to feel bad for that. I've never had a boyfriend."

James seemed caught off guard. This time, he was the one to almost spill his Pepsi. "You're joking, right?"

"I'm not." I said, suddenly offended.

"I'm not saying it as in a way to mock you, I don't think it's such a big shock to be seventeen and boyfriendless, like other people do." Well, that's another revelation. This guy was really a box full of surprises. "It's not a scandal and there's no need to be ashamed of that, honestly. The only reason I'm surprised it's because... I always thought that guy that uses to watch your rowing practices and competitions was your boyfriend."

"Dylan is my best friend." I informed him. "And he's dating Rayla. Well, actually, neither of them want to admit they're dating, but whatever, you get what I mean. So, no, he isn't and never was my boyfriend."

"And Matthew or Aiden—"

"Neither."

"Hm..." James was staring at his now empty soda with a thinking look on his face. He then glanced up at me, a devilishness spark on his eyes.

"Does that mean you've never been kissed?"

I felt my cheeks heating up, hating the fact that I was blushing. I wasn't the blushy kind of girl until I started hanging out with cocky, outgoing, cheeky, but undeniably, hot guys.

"N-no... I have."

James lifted an eyebrow and leaned forward, placing his elbows on the table.

"Really?"

"Yes... by both Matthew and Aiden, that's kind of one of the reasons Matthew is mad at me." I didn't know why I was telling James about this, but with him it was always easy and natural to talk. 

"I see..." James leaned even forward and his torso was so long that his face was merely inches apart from mine. I held my breath, trying to ignore my heartbeat that had just increased. "Well, it's his loss. Maybe when he finally wakes up and realizes what an awesome girl he has in front of him, it will be too late. Maybe then that girl will be someone else's."

"Rest your head on my heart

And your pain on my shoulders

Make your way to my arms

'Cause you got me

(...)

I'll be the one to lead you home

I'll be the one to keep you warm

I'll take you way out of the storms

When you can't stand, I'll stand up for you."

Picture is Tyler, played by Michael Trevino ;)

Music is "You Got Me" by Gavin DeGraw :D