11th Dec 1998

The slight chill in the air was barely noticed by the overseas guests, but most of the local guests pulled their shawls tightly around them.

The dancers on the floor seemed to be enjoying the tempo of the music playing at that moment. Oliver whispered something in Deepika's ear, and she rested her face against his shoulder blushing a great deal. He was dressed in a tuxedo too, and they made a very handsome couple. Naina decided with hopeful satisfaction, They are going to be just fine!

Her restless eyes started searching for Sameer again. Instead they spotted his mother smiling and chatting with Ishita. Yes, she could certainly see his family rooting for Ishita. Dressed in a gown made of layers of pale pink tissue, she looked like a princess. His parents obviously think she is the right choice for their prince! But maybe he still has his heart set on some Spanish princess.

Muttering something under her breath, she grumpily shifted her attention to the other side of the lawn. Mihir suddenly said "I was thinking, maybe we could dance for a bit as well." Seeing her 'what the hell are you talking about' look, his voice trailed off uncertainly "I mean, if you are up for it..." She answered in a clipped tone "I don't dance."

Guptaji joined them and handed Mihir a glass saying it was cola, but the way he winked conspiratorially implied some alcohol had been added. Smiling slyly, Mihir started sipping on his drink.

Sameer stood at a distance, with a big group of his cousins and Rohan's friends. He couldn't keep his gaze off her, not that he tried awfully hard. The moment he had noticed her walking down the steps with Deepika, he had felt like all the air had been sucked out of his lungs.

The dress did not reveal much skin, but instead highlighted her perfect hourglass figure, and reeled in the watcher with the promise of the luscious curves hidden underneath. She was a vision, wrapped in the delicate lace and the shimmering satin under. The strappy black heels, and her hair, which was slightly pulled back and then flowed in soft curls, completed her look for the evening. It suddenly hit him that he had never seen her dressed up before.

Even while Rohan and Sanjana led with the first dance, his eyes barely left her. She hadn't noticed him yet, and he wanted to stay hidden and observe her unhindered for as long as he could. He wanted to watch her while her guard was down, and she smiled candidly. He wanted to catch a glimpse of his old Harinakshi.

Kabir smirked as he spoke in a low voice "Last chance to run! I can see Ishita moving in this direction with a clear motive."

Not at all in a mood to indulge Ishita, Sameer quickly moved in the direction of his Mom and instead pulled her to the floor. Some bystanders cheered for the Mother and Son duo, as Vishakha happily let her son lead her.

But his cover was blown, and her gaze alighted on him. A shiver ran down her spine as Naina's eyes travelled over him. In the tailor fitted tuxedo and combed-back, gelled hair, he looked like he should be on the stage of some Hollywood awards ceremony. There were several men in the crowd that night dressed in tuxedos, but none had set the blood in her veins on fire, like he did. Disconcerted, she wondered, Is it possible that he looks even more handsome right now, than he did in just his swimming trunks that night?!

Looking at the well-groomed and elegantly dressed older woman, Naina unintentionally compared her to her own mother. Though Vishakha must be older to Rama by at least 5-7 years, she looked the younger of the two. Rama's hair was streaked with some greys, which she never attempted to hide. The worries and struggles of years were visible: some had left their mark as lines on her forehead, while others had settled permanently in the ever-tense muscles of her shoulders.

Naina's eyes quickly snapped back to him. In absolute sync, his found hers too. Ardour, tenderness, tenacity, surrender, longing, despair, and so many more emotions flashed in their eyes in an instant, as he locked his gaze with hers over his mother's shoulder. Nothing and nobody else in the room mattered. Sameer held his mother in his arms, but his eyes held Naina captive in that moment.

She was glad that her eyes had already had their fill of tears for the day. Her perceived insignificance in his life had deeply wounded her, but there was no need to display her tattered heart for others, especially him, to pity or gloat over. She stoically plastered a sliver of a smile on her face.

A waiter approached with a tray of champagne flutes and offered her some. As Naina refused the drinks, he stepped back with a slight bow and moved to other guests. She chuckled wryly to herself thinking the poor man had mistaken her for the clothes she was wearing. She made a note to herself - Maa and Nani would be so thrilled to see me dressed like this. I should ask Mihir to click a photo. Her fingers smoothed the skirt, trying to ensure that the immaculate condition of the outfit was preserved.

The song playing ended and some of the couples stepped off the floor. Letting go of Vishakha's hand, Sameer slowly started moving in Naina's direction. She hoped that at least outwardly, she wasn't the quivering mess, as she was on the inside. What could he want with me now? I mean, I know that he wants to talk, in general. But right now??

Sameer was still a couple of paces away, when Deepika stepped in front of Naina, pulling her husband in tow. She demanded "Why aren't you dancing? We agreed, we are going to have fun tonight!" As Sameer joined them, Naina smiled a little timidly "I can't dance. But I'm enjoying being a spectator." Deepika pouted "Well, being a mere spectator is not acceptable! Not after we got you all dolled up. And the whole 'can't dance' excuse is lame, considering that yesterday you were the one teaching those kids all those sassy moves!"

That's the exact opening you needed man! Now just step up and ask her to a dance. She won't be able to refuse in front of Deepika! Sameer did a little happy smug dance in his head and thanked his sister for her unplanned assistance. But he spent far too much time on his premature victory dance when he would have been better off acting promptly!

Oliver gallantly offered his hand to Naina "May I have the pleasure of this dance with you?" As Naina looked on uncertainly, Deepika squeaked in delight "Yes please! Naina, go dance with him." She stood unblinking like a deer caught in the headlights "I have never danced like this. Deepika, what if I trip and fall?!" Oliver smiled kindly "Don't worry, we will stick to some simple steps. Let me be your teacher today." As Deepika pushed her in the direction of the floor, Naina was wondering, What's with all the men in his family and their commitment to teaching?!

A bewildered Sameer looked on as Oliver showed Naina how to place her left hand on his right shoulder. Then holding her right hand in his left palm, he started leading her gently on the floor. She listened attentively and tried to follow his tips. Deepika nudged Sameer "Bhai, aren't you going to ask me to dance with you till my husband is busy?"

He smiled tightly, and offering his arm led Deepika to the dance floor. He controlled his urge to snap at her, Why the hell did your husband have to offer to dance with her? I should have been the one to teach her!

Naina was soon relaxed enough to say to Oliver warmly "You are really good at teaching!" He grinned widely "I have three younger sisters! Growing up, there used to be a lot of dance practice at our home before all their prom events." She smiled "Thank you for teaching me too."

After few moments of silence, Oliver spoke "Actually, I wanted to thank you." When she gazed at him with a confused expression, he continued "I don't know, what exactly Deepu spoke to you about yesterday. But it has helped. We ended up having a long chat last night and she opened-up about a lot of things that she hadn't before. So, thank you."

Not sure what Deepika had said to him, Naina paled slightly and muttered "It's okay. I am glad I could help." Oliver oblivious to her state of agitation carried on "I had no idea that she is worried thinking I might be regretting getting married to her. Yes, it's not quiet how I had imagined it to be... I mean the wedding. We had a registered wedding had the Town Hall, with just two of our closest friends."

He smiled a little wistfully "I had always thought, we would end up with two weddings to appease our families. I would have loved to see her walking down the aisle in a white wedding gown, just like those photos of my Mum and Dad. And she would have stolen my heart all over again dressed in her red, Indian bridal wear!"

Naina's voice was filled with wonder "You really love her so much!" He blushed a little "Yes, that I do."

Oliver sounded dismayed, when he spoke again "I have been feeling so helpless these last couple of months, seeing her in so much pain. Not being able to fix it... makes me feel like I have failed her as her man." She immediately hushed him "Ollie, don't underestimate what your being next to her, holding her hand, means to her. She doesn't expect you to fix anything. She just needs you with her."

Sameer only half listened to his sister as she conveyed the highlights of her conversation with their Dadi. He gathered the essence of the conversation based on Deepika's sarcastic tone and that he decided was enough for now. He had more important matters occupying his mind. What in the world is she discussing so raptly with Ollie?

It was nice to see Deepika and Oliver making an effort with her. But everyone else seemed to be getting a slice of the time he was craving for!

Noting the direction of his gaze, Deepika remarked smiling "She is really sweet once you get to know her." And then she added in a voice tinged with admiration "And very strong too." Sameer looked at his sister in surprise. He wondered how Naina had managed to impress her so quickly, considering Deepika had never been one to easily warm to strangers.

On catching his wife looking in their direction, Oliver, keen to be back with his beloved, started steering Naina in Deepika's direction. It was only once they were close to the brother and sister, that Naina noticed where they were. Before she could make any sense of what was happening, Olive addressed his brother-in-law, "If you don't mind, I would like to dance with my lovely wife. I will of course relinquish my charming partner to you!"

Sameer was only too happy to oblige and quickly stepped in front of her. Naina tried to object "I think I have danced for long enough..." Without paying any attention to what she was saying, Sameer instead smirked at Oliver "Well, let's see how good a teacher you are!" Oliver in turn winked at Naina "Go on, show him your moves and make me proud!"

Naina just looked on helplessly, as Olive contentedly pulled his wife back in his arms and moved away. Sameer held her in a similar pose as Oliver, only a little more firmly. Not a word was exchanged as she allowed him to lead, like Oliver had been earlier. Not that there seemed to be any choice, especially if she didn't want to draw any unnecessary attention their way.

Her eyes resolutely stayed focused on the floor for some time. Slowly they moved to his shoes, then upwards over his expensive tuxedo. Her breathing quickened as her eyes lingered on his broad chest, knowing only too well what lay beneath that crisp white shirt. After she reached his bow tie, gulping anxiously, she diverted her gaze away from the think column of his neck to her hand on his shoulder. Yes, his shoulders have certainly grown broader too. Her fingers almost imperceptibly moved a little. For just a fraction of a second, her eyes flickered up to meet his, but scorched by the heat there, she quickly lowered her eyes again.

Sameer watched her from under his half-hooded eyes. His eyes intently trying to read what her body was saying. He tried to decode her every frantic breath, the slightest graze of her fingers, and the pulse beating wildly at the base of her neck. Everywhere her eyes wandered over him, his body tingled in response.

Though her smoky eyes looked attractive, he missed their natural beauty. That soft double chin that he had found so endearing years ago was gone, and her neck appeared more swan-like now. But her lips were the just as he remembered them; soft, pink, pouty, and screaming to be kissed.

Of course, some changes were to be expected with time, but one thing stood out. Her eyes, although still beautiful, instead of the twinkling innocence of the past now had a hard glint to them. He controlled the urge to kiss her eyes and say, It's all going to be better now. Though he had no clue what he wanted to kiss better.

Sameer whispered "You're looking so gorgeous today! I can't keep my eyes off you." She was taken aback by his candour and replied self-consciously, "Thank you." And then added shakily "You are looking well too." He teased "Just well? Not handsome or dashing??" Naina flushed and muttered "Fishing for compliments doesn't suit you." He chortled and continued staring at her.

Keen to keep their conversation and mood amicable, he started "How is your work going on? Are you enjoying it as you had reckoned?" She nodded "Yes, it's going well." He remarked "Looks like they have changed your uniform. It used to be this murky shade of yellow..." She was surprised, He remembers my old uniform?! But replied "I left that job few months after that trip with you. This is a different company." Sameer pondered on this bit of information and waited for her to ask something, but she stayed quiet.

After a spell of silence, he volunteered "I ended up working with Dad and Rohan." She replied civilly "I hope you are enjoying it." but was thinking, So, he decided to play it safe and stick to the road well-travelled after all.

Sameer nodded "Yes, actually I am liking the work. It keeps me on my toes, and I travel a lot because of it." She mumbled "That's good." and then went quiet again.

"How is your mother? And your Nani?" He continued courteously. She answered, "They are fine." A brief pause later, he said in a low voice "Naina, Nanu passed away." She gently squeezed his shoulder and replied looking up at him with sad eyes, "I know. I am so sorry about it." "You knew?" he asked surprised, and she nodded "Yes, I saw it in the newspapers." Naina opened her mouth to say something else but stopped.

The song ended and she started to step away. But tightening his hold, he pulled her a little closer "I want to have the next one with you too." His right hand which had so far been resting just near her waist moved further along her back. The distance between them decreased by couple of inches, but the temperature of the air surrounding them seemed to increase by many more degrees.

His voice sounded soft and silky "This dress really suits you." She trembled slightly and rushed to clarify "It's Deepika's. She insisted. I wasn't planning to dress up for the evening." Sameer smiled just faintly, "I am glad, she did." Then sounding a little quizzical, he uttered "You two seem to be getting along quite well." Her eyes softened as Naina said "Yes, she is really sweet." His eyes narrowed "That is exactly what she said about you!" Her cheeks lost some colour wondering what else Deepika might have mentioned about her if anything. But, the way he looked, it didn't seem she had revealed anything that Naina has shared in confidence.

Finally he had her in his arms, so close and yet it was not close enough. A part of him, some remnant from the caveman era, just wanted to throw her over his shoulder and carry her off to privacy of his room. To savour the taste of her sweet mouth, to the feel the softness of all her curves, and to take her again and again. The intensity of these impulses shook him at his core and shocked him too. How does she manage to strip me of all the years of refinement and reduce me to this primal self in an instant?!

Another song ended and Naina tried to pull her hand away muttering "Thanks, I am sure there are many women here that you must be looking forward to dancing with." Sameer's hold on her remained firm as he simply said "No." She asked sounding flabbergasted "No?? What do you mean?" He shrugged "I am not looking forward to dancing with anyone else." Casting a quick glance around, she tried to reason "We danced and talked... you must have other important things to attend to."

As a slow number started, Sameer pulled her as close as it would be possible without raising a lot of eyebrows. A shiver passed through her. For a moment, Naina yearned to rest her cheek on his shoulder, just like some of the other couples on the floor. But she did not allow herself even just the fantasy for more than just one moment. Her heart admonished, Don't forget Izzy and Ishita. You were just something in between, maybe along with many others.

Deciding to do away with the idle chitchat, Sameer said "My room has a view of the swimming pool." Her back stiffened, but she did not utter a word. His words seemed to be loaded with something, but she wasn't sure what. Just a reference to times gone, or a suggestion of something to come? She didn't have a reply to either. Though a little disappointed by her lack of response, he pressed on "I have been remembering my last trip a lot. So many memories, right?"

Memories of what exactly? Memories of a girl who provided you with some distraction as you were trying to get over your long-term girlfriend?! She counted to three inhaling deeply, and then with supreme effort responded in an unemotional voice "I can barely remember anything. It's been far too long."

As he struggled to made sense of her words, Naina pulled away her hand. As she walked away, leaving a stunned Sameer in the middle of the dance floor, she vehemently thought, I will not give you the satisfaction of knowing what it meant to me, even if it kills me!

As she made to step off the floor, Mihir rushed forward "You said you can't dance, but you obviously can! You can't dance with all these strangers and not dance with me. That's not fair!" The drinks supplied by Guptaji had clearly affected the young man, and highly increased his resolve to make a move on Naina. He had watched her dancing with Oliver and then Sameer feeling very disgruntled. He was the one, who had been patiently admiring her from afar for close to a year, and these two get to sweep her off to the dance floor just like that? Not fair at all!

But he had not been the only one to notice Naina's dancing partners that evening. Every now and then, Radhika cast puzzled looks at Naina too. Something did not feel right. How had the girl managed to get her foot in through that glass door, the one that clearly marks a boundary between the clients and the employees. Finding her getting pally with Deepika had been a surprise itself, but now she was swaying in the arms of one of the most eligible bachelors at this gathering? Like Sameer, Radhika too couldn't help wondering what Deepika's white husband had been earnestly talking to Naina about. Maybe, she should have been appreciating Naina's ability to assimilate so easily with the customers, but something nagged at the back of her mind.

Naina cast back a glance at Sameer, whose darkened eyes spoke of his displeasure at being abandoned in the middle of a song. Worried that he might approach her again, she started to dance with Mihir. Hardly believing his luck, Mihir tried to hold her just as he had seen Sameer do. As she resisted, he whined "What's wrong? You were just dancing with that guy like this." Naina sounded exasperated "Just dance. There is no need to do any specific steps. I have had enough of that already!"

As Sameer walked off the floor, trying to disguise both his anger and disappointment, Ishita sauntered over enveloped in the pink cloud of delicate tissue "Sammy, shall we dance?" He shook his head and continued in the direction of the bar "Not now. I need a drink." A waiter in the vicinity immediately stepped up with a tray of champagne, but Sameer waved him away and muttered glancing over his shoulder at Ishita "None of that delicate bubbly stuff... I need a real drink!"

* * *

Hours later, Naina lay in bed fuming. She was mad, so mad, at herself!

The borrowed dress was neatly hung on a hanger, and the footwear and necklace carefully wrapped in a two plastic bags, all ready to be returned the next morning.

As soon as the song was over, she had left Mihir dancing by himself on the floor and gone looking for Vibha claiming she was starving. She retired to her room soon afterwards, but not before she said a quick goodnight to Deepika and Oliver.

As she undressed, Naina had remembered dejectedly that she had forgotten to ask Mihir to click a photo. Now she wouldn't have any photos to show her mother and grandmother.

The disappointment had her in tears. At first, just a few threatening to spill over as she tried to brush away the wrinkles in the dress, but she was sobbing by the time she had packed the shoes away. The disappointment had seemed very disproportionate, till her heart revealed the real reason of its misery - It would have been nice to have a memory of how I looked when I was in his arms once again. What are the chances that we will be so close ever again?!

And this revelation had led to her current state. She was livid at herself, at her traitorous body, for letting him affect her so easily. Even after knowing, all that she now knew about him and Izzy! When will I learn???

As the anger at herself slowly faded, another angst pushed to the fore. Long back she had stopped deliberating on ever sharing the news of the baby with him, simply because he hadn't been there. But, now that he was here, what was she supposed to do? How does anyone walk to a man and tell him that he had almost become a father? That, for just a little while, she had carried and nourished a part of him inside her.

In the past, she had tried to console herself that he probably wouldn't care anyways, like he hadn't cared about her. And did men really care about these things? Not having experienced any paternal love herself, she was oblivious of its intensity. But she was no longer sure of her hypothesis after hearing Ollie talk about the baby with such longing.

As they danced, Oliver had spoken, the pain in both his eyes and words cutting through her "I was already imagining her toddling over to offer me little toy cups of tea..." When Naina asked hesitantly "Her??" He had replied "Did Deepu not mention? We were expecting a girl. I hoped she would have Deepu's lovely jet-black hair and my mom's blue-grey eyes." He had talked a little more what he had looked forward to on becoming a father.

As much as she tried not to dwell on it, over the years, she had sometimes indulged her imagination too. How would her baby have looked? Would he have had Sameer's fair complexion and his silky hair? And his beautiful pouty lips?? Would he have inherited his father's taste for loud music???

There had been no tests or confirmation from the doctor that the baby had been a boy, but Naina strongly believed it was so. The fact that she had lost it was proof enough for her. Just like all the other men who had loved her or whom she had loved; her father, her grandfather, Sameer's Nanaji and of course Sameer. Her heart recognised a clear pattern, yes, the child must have been a boy.

Do I have to tell him about the baby now? But how? And how will he react? She tossed and turned for a long time as she wrestled with this dilemma.

* * *

Sameer had spent the last couple of hours drinking excessively, under the guise of toasts to his brothers' upcoming nuptials.

Well, he wasn't the only one who was drunk. But, unlike the others who were high and happy, he was high and furious!

Her words 'I can barely remember' kept blaring in his mind. What the hell does she mean by that? How can she not remember, when I haven't forgotten a single bloody moment spent with her?

His internal monologue had been in-progress since he walked off the dance floor.

Every now and then, he had done what was expected of him. He laughed at someone's jokes, nodded while listening to some uncle or aunt recounting some incident for the hundredth time, and thumped Rohan's shoulder amid some boisterous teasing. And then he ranted some more, And what the fuck is wrong with me?! I have spent the last four years of my life thinking about a girl who barely remembers me???

It was close to 2 am and most of the guest had retired for the night, but one group of men still sat drinking. One of Sameer's cousin produced a bottle of Tequila with a flourish and announced it was time for shots. When Rohan tried to object, his father chortled 'Young man, this is the last chance to call shots! After this, there will be only a lifetime of agreeing to whatever Sanjana says." Everyone burst into laughter, all the married men nodding their heads in total agreement. And so, a round of Tequila shots was consumed.

Sometime later, everyone started stumbling back towards their rooms, assuring each other that they were perfectly fine.

One uncle kept on insisting that he was fine enough to easily do fifty laps in the swimming pool even now! While a cousin kept muttering something about wanting to call the girl who had recently broken up with him. Seemed like he had just had a eureka moment and realised that all he needed to do was apologise to her, while his brother kept reminding him that he had already said sorry to her at least few dozen times.

Sameer scoffed thinking, The idiot thinks his ex is going to care about an apology! I bloody planned an elaborate evening of apologies for her, and she says she barely remembers! Maybe I should apologise to her for apologising that day! Or better still, take back that apology, she doesn't remember what I apologised for anyways, right?

* * *

Damn this Guptaji! Which session am I late to now?! Cursing under her breath Naina opened the door feeling disoriented, as the deep part of her sleep cycle was interrupted. Her confusion only grew to find Sameer leaning against the door frame holding his jacket instead of the expected Guptaji.

For a moment she wasn't sure if he was here or if she was just remembering something from the past. "What happened? Why are you here?" she asked befuddled. He muttered "To take it back." and then stood staring at her.

She had washed away all the makeup, making her appear more like her younger self. He noted her slightly strange sleeping attire, an orange shalwar bottom, and a long white cotton t-shirt on the top. The hair hung around her face in soft messy waves.

She asked still sounding confused "To take what back? And what time is it?" As he took a step forward, she mumbled "Does Deepika want the dress now? I mean, I have kept it ready. But, couldn't this have waited till tomorrow morning?"

He shifted his weight from one foot to another "Not the dress. What do I care about it?!" Her brow creased as she tried to guess what else he might be here to collect. Drawing a blank, she asked sounding a little flustered "Then what do you want to take back?"

He suddenly couldn't remember what he was there to take back, but his earlier angst returned. How can she not remember?! He vividly remembered kissing her in the doorway of her room that night. Does she not remember that too?

He took another step forward and her eyes widened in surprise and slight alarm, as Sameer slipped his one arm around her waist and the other tangled in her hair tilting her head back a little. She gasped "Are you drunk?!"

How can she forget?! He leaned in and brought his lips to hers. The desperation and anger of years was what the kiss was made of, not at all soft and slow, but hungry and demanding.

For the first few seconds, Naina was too shocked to react. Then, her hands, landing against his chest, tried to push him away and her lips tried to pull away, which he neither acquiesced nor acknowledged in the least. This battle of wills lasted for less than half a minute.

And then her mouth turned ravenous too. All logic seemed to fly out of the tiny window of her room, as her fingers first clutched his shirt, then his shoulders and finally his hair. Once again, Sameer pushed her against the wall by the door and they continued kissing, as both let loose the passion that had been repressed for years. Their breathing grew ragged and each tried to soak in as much of the other as possible.

When he had touched her for first time years ago, she had not known passion or what she had been missing till then. But it was different now, she knew what it was to burn with longing. Endless days and nights of shedding tears while craving his love, his touch, had left her like very dry tinder ready to burst into flames at the first lick of the flame.

Sameer grew smug with satisfaction as she writhed and moaned in his embrace. His lips savoured every inch of her face, but special attention was devoted to her lips, their pink plump softness a sanctuary for his soul. His hands fluttered over her, never staying in one place for long, comparing his memories to the new shape of her. Trying to ease the long dwelling ache in her heart, Naina whimpered "Sameer..." as she stretched on her toes and pressed her aching breasts against his chest.

As he tasted, teased and tortured the lobe of her ear, he whispered hoarsely "If this is you barely remembering, I can't wait till you start remembering properly."

His words hit her like a bucket full of ice-cold water. She stilled, as this one sentence yanked her back from the brink of madness. She remembered everything, only too well.

Naina pushed him away and hissed "Get out!" He started at her blankly not quite understanding what had suddenly changed. Shaking with indignation, she demanded "What gives you the right to barge into my room in the middle of the night and force yourself on me?!" He huffed "Force?! Don't you dare pretend like you don't want me too!"

She coloured deeply knowing he wasn't off the mark. But she couldn't risk it, not again. Naina firmly pushed him out and immediately closed the door on his face.

Sameer stood staring at the closed door disbelievingly and then knocked on it again "Open the damn door! You at least owe me one conversation."

Naina stood on the other side trembling, as it hit her, just how close she had come to losing herself to him once more.

She waited for him to leave, at the same time petrified that if he left now, he might never come knocking on her door again. When he went silent, she wrung her hands in despair, but then she heard him sit down leaning against the doorframe.

He continued talking from the other side for some time, most of it incoherently. But it was enough to soothe her fears in that moment. She settled down too, on the other side of the door.

For some time, he kept alternating between spells of silence and slurry speech. He talked of a lot of irrelevant things: tasteless food in Malaysia, colourless Sunsets in Bali, long lonely summer days in Indonesia, empty inboxes, anchorless ships on the seas, dreams that he both dreaded and longed for, the night market in Bangkok, Diwali lamps. At least they seemed irrelevant to her, but she listened to it all, his muffled voice sounding like a familiar comforting lullaby.

As he mumbled a lot about missing his happy place, she wondered haplessly - Is he talking about some bar that he likes to drink at, after all that's where they have happy hours, right? Then she worried if he drank excessively every night. Should I tell him about the dangers of drinking and the liver damage it can cause?

Her fingers sometimes caressed the door and sometimes her swollen lips. The tingling in her lips, the throbbing of her pulse near her neck where he had just nibbled, everything reminded her of the bleak nights spent missing him.

She silently wept, fighting the temptation to open the door and welcome his warmth, even if it was for just one more night.

She wondered for a moment, if she should take the easy way out and tell him about the baby now. It seemed unlikely that he would remember much the next morning. That way, she would not be withholding any information from him, and he wouldn't have to carry the pain in his heart forever as she did. She had no doubts that the news would wound him too, even if she had not mattered to him, the child would matter.

A tiny hopeful voice asked, Why is he here if I never mattered? Why is he agonizing over my not remembering?

Sameer banged the door again sounding frustrated "Naina, open this door and let me in!" She implored him sounding agitated "Sameer, please stop making a ruckus. If anyone finds you here at this time of the night, I will get sacked. I really can't afford to lose my job! Please, go back to your room."

Something must have got through to him, because standing up, he mumbled something about her messing with his head and shuffled away.

After five minutes of silence, assured that he had left for his room, Naina dragged herself back to the bed. Of course, sleep was unlikely to return that night.

* * *

(So, Samaina conversations and confrontations have been kicked off. More to follow in the next part :) Hope you enjoyed this part and do let me know what you thought of it.

I have not got around to replying to all the comments on the previous part, but will do so soon.

Take care all of you and stay safe.

Lots of love, May)