Morana

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I wasn't sure I actually wanted to ever leave the bedroom again. The events from the night kept coming over me. The hot kissing, me asking for sex, and him walking away. After some sleep, sadness wasn't the main emotion anymore. Instead, the memories made my cheeks turn to the color of a tomato in embarrassment.

But I was a witch, right? So it should have been possible for me to never leave the room ever again, right? I just needed to quickly learn how to make food magically appear. Anything, as long as I wouldn't have to face Alejo again.

Finally, my stomach was too empty, and I felt too ridiculous. Yes, it was embarrassing, but fuck it. I had been in worse situations and it would only become worse the longer I waited to see him.

I took a deep breath before pushing the door open. I walked to the bathroom and did my thing before going to the kitchen to hunt for some breakfast. Unsurprisingly, he sat at the kitchen table.

"Hey, you're awake," he said and rubbed the back of his neck.

I shot him a glare and snorted. He looked so ridiculous. Eyes dashing around, slight sweat, fidgeting. What the fuck was he so nervous about? He was the one that humiliated me and left me stranded.

"How did you sleep?" he asked.

"Fine," I spat out, and opened the fridge.

I quickly grabbed the milk and then slammed the door hard enough to make it bounce back and not close. My jaw tensed and I slammed it once again with the same result. At that I couldn't care anymore and took a bowl from the dish rack.

A lot of the milk splashed out as I pour from too high and too suddenly. When I added the cereal, I managed to get it all in the bowl, but when I lifted the bowl up to go and sit in front of the TV, a lot went over the edge.

"That angry with me?" Alejo asked as I stomped out to the living room.

"Me angry? Hardly," I snapped back and sat down.

Alejo sighed and followed me. I turned on the TV and started shoveling food into my mouth. He sat down on the floor on the other side of the table from me.

"I'm sorry, Morana. Yesterday was..."

I pick up the remote control and turned the volume up to drown out his voice. As I put the control down, he snatched it up, though, and turned the TV off.

"Just listen to me, please. I get that you're upset, but just listen and it'll make sense."

I didn't spare him a look and continued eating. But my lack of a more hostile response seemed to be all the assent he needed to keep talking.

"Witches and, well, most magical creatures aren't like humans when it comes to love and relationships. Basically, we have one person out there that is the perfect one for us," he explained. "Our mate. Or soulmate. That person is like our other half, we're not complete until we meet them. And as much as I wish you were, you're not my mate and I'm not yours."

I stopped eating and looked at him. That was far from what I had expected. I had assumed some reasoning of that he didn't want to lose the friendship. Never had I imagined something like that.

"How can you be so sure?" I asked, though, because the last bit didn't make sense. I felt comfortable and at ease around Alejo in a way I hadn't ever felt with anyone. A reasonable explanation would then be that we were soulmates, that we were destined to be together. So how could he be so sure that wasn't the case?

"How we find our mates works a bit differently for different magical creatures," he continued the explaining. "The ones that are more related to animals, such as shifters, find by scent. Some other find by touch. Witches find by sight. When we look into the eyes of the person who is our mate, we just know. I've heard it described as if everything in the world stops matter except that one person."

"That's insane," I blurted out. "Fucking weird and honestly, sounds like you stop having your own free will."

Alejo shook his head. "It's not like that. Your mate is perfect for you, a perfect fit. That we just recognize them for what they are when we see them makes the beginning of the relationship faster and smoother."

"And what does this have to do with yesterday?" I mumbled and looked away from him again. From what he said, then yeah, we weren't mates. I had never had any such reaction when looking into his eyes. If anything, the intensity of what I felt for him had developed over time. But so what if we weren't mates? Couldn't we still be together?

"I care so much about you, Morana. And honestly, already from our first conversation the idea of a mate stopped making sense to me. The idea that there is a woman out there somewhere who is more beautiful, and perfect and in any way better than you is just crazy to me. I want you to be my mate so badly. But you're not. Which means that one day I will meet my mate and one day you will meet yours."

"Okay, I somewhat get what you mean," I said slowly. "But also, not. You can't live your life with your head in the future."

"Regarding this, I can." He sounded determined and firm. "Any relationship a magical creature has before they meet their mate is doomed to fail. I don't want to break your heart or have you break mine."

I opened my mouth to refute, but finally understanding sunk in. It was weird though. Most relationship that even humans had ended in heartbreak, but you would never know unless you tried. But that was what he was saying and that I finally got. We didn't need to try to know.

"I shouldn't have kissed you yesterday. And I probably should have explained all of this before," he said and lowered his gaze.

"You probably should have, yeah," I answered in a hollow voice.

"I'm sorry. I don't know why I didn't. I guess it made it easier to deny the fact that you aren't... I really don't get how you can't be though. The Goddess must have been blind when she didn't make you my mate."

"Stop it," I said and stood up. I felt empty and like his words echoed inside of me, like they made me even more hollow. Though I hadn't known about mates mere moments ago, it now felt devastating hearing him say I wasn't his. "I'm not. So just leave it at that. You'll regret those words when you finally find her."

I walked towards the hallway. Alejo quickly got up and grabbed my arm.

"I'm sor..."

"I'm going to change and take a walk. I need to be alone and let this sink in a little more."

Alejo nodded and let go. "Of course. Take your time. I'll be here."

I didn't say anything else as I walk out of the living room.