Chapter 5 - Heartless
The sound of one of Matty's favorite local bands pumps through his bathroom while he holds a thin curling iron to your hair. You're buried in your phone, bouncing between texting Travis and Harrison. Travis is making sure you know he won't be home and the door's locked as usual and Harrison is triple checking the address and time, making sure you really want to go tonight. Mikey is seated in the bedroom that connects to the bathroom, his position allowing him to see you and Matty while he's laid on the bed.
"You comfortable in there?" You quip, looking up from your phone once Matty moves the curling iron away from your head.
"Better than the fumes Matty is letting out in there." Mikey groans as he hears Matty start spraying some of your hair with hairspray.
"Better than the fumes you bring home with you." Matty snaps. "You always smell like a rusty car garage."
You snort at the so-called insult. "Rust car garage?"
"I have a hot curling iron very close to your ear." Matty warns as he goes in for the final strand of hair.
"I was just saying." You laugh, trying not to move too much. "How much longer anyway?"
"Why? Nervous?" Matty quips.
"Nervous you're gonna ruin two people's lives?" Mikey chimes in.
Your shoulders drop and your expression falls. "You guys are mean."
They've both been at it all night. You sat them both down the night before and explained everything. You told that while you understand it's wrong, you can't figure out another way. Matty suggested just having a sparring match at the gym with Tom, see how he is and that's not such a bad idea. But, as it is you, you turned it down. The boys kept at it though, telling you to just not fuck with people's feelings. It's not the right thing to do and you're very well aware of that. After an hour, Mikey had given up and that's when Matty really started in.
Mikey has known you longer but Matty tends to get to be more reasonable. Matty understands a different part of you that Mikey doesn't, it's part of why you're friends. Matty's entire point the night prior was that if you really did find any interest in Tom, you wouldn't use his best friend regardless of the consequences with boxing.
Tom's dangerous, gasoline to a lit match. But, he's only dangerous because of the boxing. That's it. That's the only reason. You're interested, very interested and you're never interested in anyone. You like to remain a one-night stand. It's easy and safe and you find comfort in it. Real interest, that's scary. But, you don't know him and bottom line is that you're not sure if you can give up your freedom or your life for someone you simply might end up truly liking. Someone you don't know. Rock and a hard place.
Matty glances to Mikey before rolling his eyes and moving onto a new section of hair. "Sure we are."
You sigh. "You guys are never letting this go if I follow through, huh?"
"Nope." Mikey says immediately.
"Matty?" You ask.
Matty removes the iron from your hair and moves in front of you, leaning against the counter to face you. "Look what happened to you." Matty's voice is soft but almost pleading. "You're still fucked up from that and it's been what? Seven years? I'm just saying, you're setting them both up for a life of that but worse. And before you go off," Matty changes his tone, pushing away from the counter. "You can figure something else out but dating them with ill intentions, that's not the solution."
"So you think I should go with Mikey's idea?" You ask as Matty starts pinning some of your hair back.
"Yep." Matty says. "You like him, he likes you. Why not....just do it?" Matty looks in the mirror to make eye contact with you. "Why not just go for it and then he'll trust you, you'll trust him? If you can team up with him rather than this, y/n, it might work this time and," Matty goes back to working on your hair. "You can stop always lookin' over your shoulder."
"How about I think about it then?" You offer. "I can't cancel right now anyway but I'll think about it over dinner." You shrug, looking at Matty with pleading eyes. "I promise, no bullshit."
"Okay." Matty says.
"Yeah, alright." Mikey agrees as he walks into the bathroom. Matty starts spraying your hair with hairspray. "Really?"
"You came in here." Matty states. "We're done with her hair anyway."
"Finally." You groan.
"Well, I was trying to hide the blue. You have a blue dress you could have worn so your hair would match." Matty crosses his arms over his chest.
"Oh, shame." You say sarcastically. "I don't think he'll care if my hair matches my dress."
"How do you know?" Matty counters, hands going to his hips.
"Mikey," You stand up and straighten the red dress with a flowing skirt that cuts just above the knee. "What'd'ya think?"
Mikey nods and he can't help but smile. "Wow."
"He doesn't care." You laugh, turning back to Matty. "Now, I have to do my makeup." You take your seat back and Matty takes a seat on the counter, ready to hand you whatever you ask for.
While you finish getting ready, Tom and Harrison are back at their apartment, Harrison getting dressed and checking the GPS on his phone a hundred times. Tom is in the living room, beer in hand and sweats clinging to his body.
Tension has been thick with them since yesterday. Tom is very obviously jealous that Harrison has a date with you without even trying. Tom doesn't even get to try thanks to Arthur but Arthur doesn't seem to have an issue with Harrison dating you. And, all yesterday, it just pissed him off but now as Harrison strolls into the living room, Tom thinks of something.
"Good?" Harrison asks as he stands to the side of Tom.
"Good." Tom nods once, looking back to the TV.
Harrison says as the weight of guilty pulls his heart to stomach. "Are you?"
Tom nods. "Yep."
Harrison weighs the idea of just calling it off. He could say that he's sick. At this point, he'd be willing to just go to the ER, fake some weird stomach ache just so Arthur would believe him but, then that'd just buy him enough time to reschedule not cancel fully. And he could tell Tom but Tom can be a wild card and he might change around Arthur if he knows right now. Harrison has to wait for the right time to tell Tom it's a setup. But, then, he could always tell you. If he tells you Arthur is making him do it, maybe he won't have to worry about you getting invested. It sucks for you, too and he doesn't even know at this point because he doesn't even think he can trust you. The only thing Harrison knows for certain is that he wants to go home which is pretty ironic considering he is home.
"Are you gonna tell me what happened the other night then?" Harrison asks, a last ditch effort to get something out of Tom.
"Nope." Tom answers plainly and he's fighting a battle in his head to ask a question he's dying to know the answer to but if he asks, Harrison will want an explanation and Tom can't give him one.
Harrison shakes his head, internally punching himself. "You said you were okay with it."
"I am." Tom mutters. "Give me a minute, alright?" Tom ditches the beer on the end table before getting up and going to the kitchen. "You're really into her, ya?" Tom asks, finding this to be the best way to ask the question he wants. It's not completely direct but at least Harrison won't start asking questions.
Harrison looks down and back to Tom, hating that he has to lie to him. Hating that he has to lie and subsequently hurt his best friend and you, two people who don't deserve the manipulation. "Yeah, yeah I am." Harrison lies.
"Awesome." Tom mumbles, an unsuccessful way of hiding his disappointment.
Tom bites the inside of his cheek, his heart aching from the so-called truth. Tom wants it so bad to be Arthur's doing. Arthur seemed pleased that Harrison asked you out and Tom, after thinking about it, was just hoping that Arthur had something to do with it. Harrison wouldn't do this, not over a girl but maybe he would now. It's a mess and Tom's jealous and a little heartbroken.
"Yeah, I'll be back later." Harrison mumbles, heading for the door.
"Haz," Tom gets his attention but he doesn't say anything, there's just this look Harrison hasn't seen before. Tom looks almost desperate and like he wants to ask Harrison to just call it off. But, Harrison knows he won't. Harrison gave him that whole thing about you liking him and for once, to let him get the girl. It's all bullshit but Tom doesn't know that and that just makes it worse.
"Why do you like her?" Harrison asks, his eyes slightly narrowed.
Tom shrugs. "Dunno, just do."
Harrison sighs and Arthur never said how long Harrison has to keep this up. "Feel her out, talk you up a bit and if she seems even a little interested, that's it."
"Thanks." Tom says quietly.
"Yeah." Harrison nods before opening the door and leaving Tom to himself.
Tom really can't pinpoint why he wants anything to do with you. He just does which only adds to his guilt of making Harrison feel guilty for asking you on a date. You don't give him the time of day which makes the chase fun but you're not actually a bitch to him. Instead of glaring or telling him off, you just smirk and play into the game. Tom was so positive that he had a chance and it just doesn't make any sense and that's what got him feeling so jealous, not that Harrison is going on a date. He just thought he had a chance.
Harrison allows the GPS to guide him to Matty and Mikey's house on another side of the city. Harrison follows the GPS to a point but he's never been to this area of Chicago before and as he gets deeper into it, the more the houses don't look like the ones he sees on the daily basis. The houses all look old and mostly unkempt. Windows aren't boarded up or anything to that extreme, it just seems to be not what he's used to but how could Harrison possibly be surprised? People don't end up underground boxing for fun, not here.
Harrison pulls up to the curb and sucks in a deep breath before exiting the car. As he starts to walk up to the gate, the tan door opens and you appear with Matty and Mikey behind you. Harrison's brows raise as he swallows. You clean up very, very well and now he regrets coming even more.
You eye Harrison and to no surprise to you, he's dressed perfectly. But, what really catches you is what he's wearing. Plain black shirt, black jeans, matching black shoes, and a red leather jacket. Somehow, the two of you managed to color coordinate.
"We match." You chuckle as you walk down the stairs, black heeled boots clicking against the steps.
"Yeah," Harrison's cheeks starting a pretty shade of pink. "We do."
You put your hands in the pockets of your black leather jacket. "Well, are you ready?" You ask, a sweet smile on your lips.
"Yeah, absolutely." Harrison nods a few times before stepping to the side and gesturing his hand for you to walk first.
You get a good look at the black car and your first reaction is to turn around and make a comment but you refrain. You aren't completely sure what you're doing with Harrison yet and you don't actually want to come off like you're judging him for something he doesn't have control over. But, then it hits you that it's probably not even his car.
Harrison opens the door for you and allows you in, you nodding to Mikey and Matty before you get in. Harrison shuts the door and makes his way to the opposite side.
"A Bentley?" You quirk a brow, buckling your seatbelt. "Not your car, is it?"
Harrison gains an embarrassed smile. "No, it's not." He chuckles softly as he buckles his seatbelt. "Boss's car." The smile falters and you just get confused all over again.
"He...loaned you his car so you could take me on a date?" You inquire.
Harrison nods a few times but his demeanor has seemed to completely change. He went from a normal pre-date nervous to suddenly very uncomfortable. If people borrow a car from their boss and it's no big deal, they don't get uncomfortable. You know the car is Arthur's but Harrison doesn't know you know. So, you want to play it off. If Tom had told Harrison that you know Arthur, Harrison wouldn't just brush it as his boss. Something's off and you're regretting your decisions now.
"Yeah, he's...cool." Harrison says as he puts the car in drive but the words are forced.
You drop it and try a different angle. "Where're we goin'?"
"Oh," Harrison says, not remembering the name of the restaurant. "Here." He points to the GPS and you smile, trying to hold back a laugh as you're piecing it together.
"Your boss suggest it?"
Harrison's cheeks immediately flare red. "Yeah." Harrison says.
A lightbulb seems to go off above your head. "Turn left."
"What?" Harrison glances to you.
"Turn left." You say again.
Harrison hesitates but he reaches the stop sign, he turns, going against the GPS. You direct him two streets down, four houses down from the corner. Harrison pulls over and you unbuckle your seatbelt. He watches you carefully as his heart starts to race. You have to go to the restaurant. Harrison is sure Arthur will have someone keeping on eye on him to make sure he goes with you but you just resituate and pull your phone out from your pocket.
"Smile." You say, leaning over the center console to take a selfie. Harrison smiles as you take the picture. "Okay, c'mon." You grin, moving for the door.
"Wait." Harrison reaches over and pulls at your arm gently. "What 'bout dinner? Where are we?" Harrison rambles.
"We're at my house." You say nonchalantly. "And we'll go to dinner after." You bite your lip as you go for the door again, this time successfully getting it open and exiting before Harrison could stop you.
Harrison sits for a second, questioning what he's going to do. After. You said after and to Harrison, you could only mean one thing but why? By the look of your makeup and hair, you've put in a lot of effort and why would you just...ruin it? And Harrison isn't willing to sleep with you. But that's exactly what you're thinking, right? If he tells you no, you might get offended or pissed off and just cancel everything and then Harrison is fucked. But, if he agrees, and Tom finds out, he's fucked. Harrison is in a hell of a situation and he has no idea how to get out of it.
Harrison gets out of the car, locking it as he walks up to you. You smile at him, reaching out for his hand. He takes it. Your skin is rough and his thumb brushes over your knuckles. He'd never paid attention before because why would he? But, your knuckles feel like they have cuts and scabs over the top of them, like they've been beaten to hell. The palm of your hand is calloused and Harrison has to wonder exactly how much time you really spend in a ring.
You lead him up the walkway while Harrison tries to think of an excuse to just go to dinner without upsetting you. He doesn't want to upset you anyway, making you think you're not good enough or anything like that. But, his mind comes up blank and before he even knows it, you're releasing his hand and grabbing your key to unlock the door.
"So, you live here?" Harrison shoves his hands into the pockets of his jacket, looking around your front stoop.
"Um," You look to him and shrug. "Yeah?" You say softly as you jiggle the doorknob, finally getting it unlocked. "Sometimes it sticks." You explain.
"Gotcha." Harrison says, his voice a little timid.
You give him a confident smile before entering your home, knowing Travis was staying at Charlotte's house for the night. Harrison follows you inside but before he could get a good look at the home, you were shutting the door and pulling Harrison to you. You pin him against the door and your lips connect with his. Harrison groans against you, eyes shooting wide open and he should pull away. He should pull away for Tom, but he doesn't. Harrison's hands go to your hips and his eyes flutter closed while his mouth starts to move in sync with yours.
You're used to having one night stands. You don't usually do relationships. You go out to bars when Travis won't be home and Mikey and Matty are free and you bring someone home. It's fun and it's always easy. No strings attached but this is so much different. There are stakes here and instead of just the wanting to get off, you just feel the guilt building your stomach and wanting to boil over. You didn't really expect Harrison to kiss you back.
You pull away just enough to whisper against Harrison's lips. "I have a proposition."
Harrison's eyes open, as he looks down to you, curious about what you were thinking and what made you stop. "Go on."
You go in to kiss him again, Harrison not missing a single beat. "You could sleep with me." You mumble between kisses.
Harrison pulls away a little, jaw falling open and you can see him visibly gulp. "Sleep with you? As in-"
"Fuck me, yeah. You heard right." You giggle, licking your lips.
"And you're serious?" Harrison asks, the look of pure shock is etched across his face.
"Dead serious." You lean in closer as you whisper in Harrison's ear, your hands trail to the hem of his shirt, thumbs brushing under it and rubbing the smooth skin. You kiss his cheek and move down his jaw. "What'd'ya say, Osterfield?" You ask in a low voice, nipping at Harrison's neck causing him to involuntarily pull at your hips, bringing you flush against him.
Harrison's chest heaves and it's now or never. You kiss his neck but you're careful not to even go near leaving a mark and your hands stay where they are, not moving up or down, not going to remove his jacket or shirt. You're asking for permission and Harrison's mind goes to Tom because he should be here, not him.
"I'm sorry." Harrison whispers, squeezing your hips and softly pulling you away from him. But, when he gets a look at your face, you're giving him a gentle smile and his brows knit together.
"Arthur set this up, huh?"You ask.
Harrison's eyes bulge just like Tom's did. "H-how did you...what?"
You laugh. "C'mon, can I get you somethin' to drink? We've got pop, coffee, beer?" You move away from Harrison and go to the kitchen.
Harrison stands against the door in shock, brows furrowed as he watches you. His eyes go to the floor and then to the side, trying to figure out what just happened. Was that some type of weird test? And how the hell do you even know about Arthur? And that he would set it all up? Why aren't you mad?
"Dude," You call. "You coming?"
Harrison snaps out of his thoughts, directing his stare right at you before pushing off the door. "What just happened?" Harrison asks as he makes the few feet walk to the kitchen.
"Tom didn't tell you?" You ask as you grab yourself a pop, leaving the fridge open for you to gesture to it.
"Water, please." Harrison says. "Tell me what?" He takes a seat at the table while you kick the fridge closed and grab him a bottled water from the floor.
"The other night, Arthur came looking for him and saw us talking. I said his name. Did you not know?" You take your seat across from Harrison and pass him the water.
"No?" Harrison shakes his head, opening the bottle. "Why wouldn't he tell me?"
You shrug, cracking open the pop. "Had to guess, Arthur's doing. Guy's pretty fucked up."
"Can you explain what's going on?" Harrison lets out a frustrated sigh.
Tom didn't tell him you and Arthur know each other. Tom said it was just another boxer the other night which is true but that's different. Something happened before Harrison showed up and Tom isn't speaking. You were there but how much could you really know? You agreed to this date and you asked him to have sex with you but it seems it wa as test. Nothing is making sense and Harrison just feels like his head is going to explode.
You take a drink and shake your head. "You first."
Harrison stares at you, more uncertainty filling his veins. "When we're done here, we still go to dinner."
You reach across the table, opening your hand to shake his. Harrison takes your hand and shakes it. "Deal."
"Arthur wanted me to date you to get inside of your head and to piss off Tom enough that he'd win without question. You were flirting with me so he took advantage of it. Threatened me and he freaks me out so, had to." Harrison admits without any hesitation as if it were eating at him over the past day.
"That's what I thought." You say, the comment leaking with hints of agitation but not towards Harrison.
"You knew?" Harrison asks.
"When I saw the car, I did." You explain. "If Tom's in debt to Arthur, that means you're not gonna have money either, not enough money to afford a fucking Bentley. And then you admitted to Arthur loaning it to you. You just confirmed it when you didn't know the name of the restaurant."
Harrison hangs his head, guilty smile coming to his lips. "I'm not good at this."
"Good." Your eyes leak sincerity. "You don't want to be."
Harrison watches you shift in your seat as if more's eating at you. "Your turn."
"I have to win and I'll do anything for it, as you are. I was gonna date you to get into Tom's head so I could win." You admit and there's guilt in every single word and every move of your eyes as you avoid Harrison's stare.
"I won't tell him." Harrison says softly.
Your eyes snap to his. "Why not?"
Harrison takes a drink. "What he doesn't know can't hurt him." Harrison says. "But don't try with him, not if you're pulling this shit."
You nod once and silence fills the air. There's a bigger picture and the two of you are in it together. You might have Ian to worry about but at the end of the day, you and Harrison have Arthur. Arthur is the big guy that controls everything and everyone. He can convince Harrison to betray his best friend. If you pull what you did last time, you're screwed. He can't physically touch you like he can with Harrison and Tom and he can't do with you what he does to his losing boxers, but he sure as hell can make sure you pay for everything. Arthur has a lot of enemies but he has the power to have them and dispose of them. Your decision was never right or wrong. There was never a decision. You need to try again, work with Harrison and eventually Tom.
You pull out her phone and go to Instagram, posting the picture of you and Harrison. "How'd you get involved with Arthur?" You ask.
"Why?" Harrison asks. "Who are you callin'?"
"Not calling." You pass him the phone. "Covering your ass for the moment. This will buy you time."
"You were planning this? In the car?" Harrison smiles as he sees the post, public for people to see.
You nod a few times before you let out a sigh. "Do you have any idea what you guys got yourselves into?"
Truthfully, Harrison and Tom have no idea. All Arthur tells them is that if Tom wins, they're off the hook. If Tom loses, Arthur owns them but that could mean anything. Harrison has always had a bad feeling and deep down Tom has too but he hasn't been willing to admit it. It seems you might be the key to unlocking exactly what they got themselves into.
Harrison's brows furrow as he pushes your phone back to you. "Um, just Tom has to win and we do what he says."
You bite the inside of your cheek, debating on telling him. If you tell him what you know, he could go right to Arthur and tell him. If Arthur finds out you're running your mouth, you're done for. When you say Arthur can't touch you, it's because you're too smart to go running your mouth but now you're given the opportunity to really do something about him. Harrison and Tom are your openings. They're strangers but they don't deserve what Arthur has planned. But, trust isn't easily given, especially coming from you.
"I...I need to tell you something." You start, shame filling your voice. "But....I need to do something and you have to do something because if I tell you, you can rat me out."
"What do you want?" Harrison asks.
"First, you can't tell Tom."
Harrison immediately groans and hangs his head. "Of course not."
You sigh. "That's it. I'm gonna fuckin' trust you against my better judgment."
"Why?" Harrison's eyes are narrowed in suspicion.
"Something about Tom makes me like him and if you tell him I said that, I'll knock your teeth in. But, also because you guys have no idea what you got yourselves into and I've seen you with Arthur. You already fucking hate him, Tom is terrified."
"Yeah, noticed that." Harrison's eyes go distant for a second. "I won't say anything." Harrison promises. "To anyone." Harrison needs to know what's going on so you have his word.
"Okay, here's the thing, Arthur only has like two boxers that have stuck around but...." You pause. "They pop in and out and it's....sketchy. I dunno, it's weird as fuck, man." You say. "He had this one though and long story short, I did some stuff and found out some stuff and, um, I don't know for sure because I got caught before I had anything solid but....I think....I think he sells his boxers. The ones that lose."
"What do you mean he sells his boxers?" Harrison asks, his voice is low and on edge.
You shrug. "There was an investigation after I got caught because well, I opened my mouth, lesson not learned as you can see. I don't really know exactly what. Seems like he just....sells them? Maybe to other people in the county through the underground leagues. "
Harrison's heart stops dead in his chest. "What?" His voice cracks.
You nod. "Yeah, the investigation didn't go on long and it just...went away." You scoff. "Like...just vanished. If you look into it, there's no information. Nothing. No public files on it. It's like it never fucking happened when it did." You pause, Harrison looking like he's about to throw up. "But here's the thing, I don't really know if that's what going on. I think it's a little far-fetched if I'm being honest but he does do something with these guys." You explain further telling the full truth.
"How do I know you're not fuckin' with me? To get in my head?" Harrison asks and rightfully so.
"You can help me prove it." You say. "We be friends and if I can get in with you, I get into Arthur's shit again."
"That's a big theory." Harrison states but there's no doubt in his tone.
"I know." You says, simply. "I know but I'm telling you, something isn't right and I think I am. Look, if I didn't believe I was, I would have had you and/or Tom in bed right now."
Harrison gives her a displeased look. "Really?"
"Yep." You give him a cocky grin, a terrible attempt at lightening the mood. "I wanted to just get into Tom's head originally but I feel like a shitty person for all this and Mikey mentioned trying again and he's right. If I didn't think you guys were totally fucked, I wouldn't care. I would do whatever to win but getting sold for anything, that shit is..." You wince. "I can't set Tom up to lose like that."
"You're really serious?"
"Unfortunately."
Harrison doesn't say anything for a few beats. There's an overwhelming feeling of panic and dread wanting to consume him. He knew there was something wrong with Arthur and he knew something was up with Tom. Tom hasn't been his usual self since Arthur brought up the boxing. You're right, there's more to this and it goes deeper than what Harrison and Tom think. If they want out, they need you.
"Tom likes to gamble. It's how he got into this. He lost over twenty grand from Arthur. He got desperate-"
"Desperate people do desperate things." You interrupt, your words showing you understand.
Harrison nods. "Yeah, he made a deal with Arthur."
You huff. "And you're guilty by association."
"Yep." Harrison says, going for another drink of water.
"Why'd you tell me?" You ask.
"Now you have something on us." Harrison shrugs, but the corner of his mouth is pulled into a smile. "What's your plan?"
"I don't have one." You laugh, leaning back in your chair. "Not yet, I've had all of not long to think here. For now, we go to dinner, we tell Tom, Mikey, and Matty nothing. We just...go on. We had dinner, it was nice. That's it. We don't fake date or any of that. If you find something out, lemme know and vise versa. I'll keep you in the loop but we just go on like this conversation never happened."
"We're friends." Harrison shrugs a single shoulder.
"Exactly. We can flirt a little but not over the top."
"Tom has to keep winning." Harrison states.
"If he looks like he's going to lose-"
"I'm telling him."
"Good." You agree. "Now, come here." You stand up, straightening your dress. Harrison follows your lead as you walk up to each other. You run your hands through his hair, messing it up a little bit before doing the same to your hair, removing a few pins. "Sex hair."
Harrison chuckles. "Really?"
"Safe than sorry."
"Hey," Harrison starts as you lean against the table. "Tom really is into you."
You give Harrison a gentle smile. "I know." You whisper. "He didn't say a word to me yesterday but I saw him staring me down and he gives me that look. I know."
Harrison laughs a little, running a hand through his hair. "Told him I'd bring it up."
Your head goes back as you let out a laugh. "Why?"
Harrison rolls his shoulders. "Think you're into him, too."
"Everyone thinks they know shit." You remark, pushing away from the table. "Guess, you'll never know since you said to stay away."
Harrison shakes his head. "Can't control him," Harrison wiggles his brows. "We're friends after all."
"You need to spit out whatever you're hinting at."
"'M just saying, if we all make it out of this alive and not....ya know, maybe you should ignore what I say."
You roll your eyes as you try to bite back your smile but to no avail. "We have to go to dinner, Harrison."
"This might be a disaster." Harrison warns, but there's a plotting smile on his lips.
"Guess we'll have to make it work then." You smirk, leading the way out of your house and sealing your fate.
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