SJ's heart is in her throat and there's a part of her that regrets showing him. He'd see it eventually at the rate they're going and it's definitely easier to just show him rather than him finding out in the middle of having sex but she doesn't talk about it. There's so much that goes into that crest and Tom might push for more than she's willing to give him. But, he has burns on his back from Arthur and she needs to show him that she gets it. She understands at least some of his pain and what he's going through.

Tom's brows are pulled together and his forehead is creased while he holds onto SJ's arm. "What do you mean it's Arthur's family crest?"

SJ pulls her arm out of his grasp, resting her elbow on her hip. "So, without giving you the entire long backstory because that's not right now, basically, you know those wax pressers? Like what your Hogwarts letter would have been sealed with?"

Tom huffs and he can't help but almost laugh and close his eyes for a second at her reference. It's something so serious and she's going to go for a Harry Potter reference. "Mhm." Tom hums, opening his eyes.

"Okay, Arthur has some of those, so long story short, I've got his blinds pulled in his office--"

"You were in his office?" Tom's expression switches back to confusion.

"Do you wanna know how I got his family crest burned into my arm or why I was in his office?"

Tom sighs and he should have guessed he'd only be getting one explanation instead of two but it was worth a shot to ask. However, he will be bugging her about it because it's going to eat at him. His office of all places just seems like a weird place. Tom had kind of assumed they'd only known each other through the boxing but for her to be in his office, that would be mean they know each other on the outside. Just another question Tom has.

"Go on." Tom says and he rests an arm around her hip, pulling her a little closer to him.

"Well, the person who was supposed to save my ass, did not. Arthur barged in and saw me on his laptop so he pinned me down, took a lighter, held it the metal, and burned me because the guy who was supposed to save my ass helped him to save his own ass."

It takes everything in Tom not to start asking a thousand questions running through his head. She was working with someone but they turned on her and what does that even mean? Why even bother trying to get into his laptop and if he caught her, why not just report him? Why is everything so secretive? There's a lot going through his head but there's a look on SJ's face that says she has way too much going through her head. So, Tom opts for an easy question she might not have a problem with answering.

"Why don't you go to the police? It's his crest shouldn't they be able to help you?"

Of course going to the police could be a not-so-terrible idea. But, it's Arthur and the police don't like to mess with people with big names. Arthur has a big name, he brings in a lot of business for the city. Without anything concrete, it'd just be SJ's word against his. She's a no one and he's a someone.

"Arthur likes to own people, he likes people to know that he has them and there's nothing they can do about it. It's why he chose the crest instead of a cigar or just the lighter." SJ starts explaining because it's easier to ramble about this than actually sit and think of a coherent thought. If she starts thinking, she'll back out of telling him anything. "I didn't get anything on him. I didn't have time to put anything on a flash drive or a hard drive or anything. I know what I saw but I saw it for maybe five seconds and that's all I had. He branded me to remind me that I don't have anything besides my word and he has a ton of shit that can easily send me to prison. I don't like the idea of prison. If I'm gonna risk it, I want die-hard proof so at least he gets locked up, too."

Tom's heart plummets. SJ looks away from him and whatever she saw wasn't good. It's in the quiver of her voice and the way she dodges his face. Harrison said SJ had a plan, she's going to get them out of whatever mess they've gotten themselves into. What if that's what she was doing the first time and what if whatever she saw is exactly what she's trying to get them out of? Something isn't right, something is beyond fucked up and Tom hates himself for it. Whatever it is, he's now dragging SJ and her friends into it and he didn't even know or mean to.

Tom's arm flexes around SJ, silently giving her encouragement to tell him more. "What'd you see?"

SJ's eyes meet his and she sighs. If she goes into what she saw then she knows he'll be freaked out. Harrison looked like he was going to faint when she'd mentioned the rumor of Arthur selling his boxers to other people like Arthur. Tom is likely to actually freak out if she tells him what's on that computer, and just what she could access in the time she had. The last thing SJ wants is for Tom to start freaking out. Her reasoning might be selfish, because she likes his arm around her and she likes how close they are right now and she doesn't want to ruin it, but maybe it's not completely selfish. What he doesn't know right now, about that, can't possibly hurt him. If she tells him, he might go off the rails and confront Arthur. That would be bad for everyone.

SJ moves closer to him, her forehead resting on his collarbone. "Just lemme handle it." Her voice is soft and pleading, not demanding like Tom would have expected it to be.

His grasp on her tightens as he looks down to her. "Let me help you."

Her heart pulls and a lump forms in her throat because she could use the help. She needs someone to walk up to her and take the weight of the world from her shoulders if just for a second. It's heavy and crushing and she feels like she can't straighten her back anymore because it's all so much, it's hard to walk and she just needs a break. But, she can't. If she breaks, if she lets herself breathe, there will be something there to make sure she doesn't gather all of her pieces and put herself back together. There will be something having a hand to her throat, cutting off any hope for regaining her breathing. She has Harrison and that's help enough. Harrison will listen to her and Tom is more likely to get hurt if she slips.

"It's okay." She picks her head up and meets his stare. "I got it, just trust me, okay?"

Tom sighs but he agrees because he doesn't want to fight her. He has to trust her for her to trust him. "Okay."

"I'm...I am sorry for everything." SJ says. "Lying to you."

Tom presses a kiss to her forehead and it's something no one has done before. "'S alright." Tom looks back to her and there's a smirk tugging at one side of his mouth. That was a heavy conversation and SJ is clearly done talking about it, so he might as well change the subject. "SJ?"

"Hm?"

"We smell." Tom chuckles and SJ immediately bursts into laughter.

"We smell like sex and teenager's hockey bag."

Tom's laugh booms against SJ's chest while he shakes his head. "That's oddly specific."

"Trust me, it's true." SJ's laugh vibrates with Tom's and he loves her laugh. It's slowly becoming his favorite sound. "I know it'll ruin Matty putting the ointment on your burns but I mean, I'm pretty sure your sweat already did that, but we can shower if you want?"

There's resistance in Tom answering. It's not that he doesn't want a shower or need one or even want to take one with SJ, it's that he knows those burns are going to make him want to rip his skin right off of his back. With fresh burns, Tom has literally bitten his lip so hard from trying not to scream out in agony while showering just to hide it from Harrison. Tears cascade down his face so fast he can't tell what's shower water and what's actually tears. SJ has already seen him in an extremely vulnerable situation and he doesn't know how he feels about her seeing him in another one, in the same night.

"If you don't want to, it's fine." SJ shrugs and there's no disappointment in her voice. "You can shower and then I can shower. I, um," SJ looks away for a second. "I just know it's gonna hurt and you probably haven't cleaned them real well, the old ones, so I figured if you were okay, I could help." Her voice went from confident to shy with the offer and there's a kind smile across her lips.

"Didn't take you as the caretaker type?"

Tom says and it's not to be rude. His voice a bit joking but he is surprised. Matty seems to the "mom" friend and Mikey is like an overprotective brother. SJ always came off as the wild child but she's offering to help him shower to make sure his burns gets cleaned. She was there to help Harrison save his ass. She took him to the car. She got the first-aid kit.

"Tell me why you're weird about showering and I'll tell you why I think I can be the 'caretaker type'." SJ holds up one hand to put air quotes around Tom's repeated words.

Tom sighs and his hand comes to her hip but he keeps her close to his chest. "It's...gonna hurt." Tom's cheeks flush blood red.

"I know, though." SJ says with understanding. "That's kind of, part of why I showed you the crest, so you'd know I'd understand."

Tom's thumb rubs the skin under her shirt, his eyes on his hand. "I dunno." He mutters. "I don't want you to think less of me, I guess."

SJ is visibly taken aback. She's the one that's always afraid he's going to look at her differently. Why would she see him differently because of burns? Because of being in pain over burns that are by definition painful?

"I won't think less of you for being in pain over something that's literally painful."

Tom brushes his nose against hers and SJ scrunches her face, a smile coming to her lips once more. "We'll shower after you tell me."

SJ sucks in a breath and shrugs a shoulder. "I, um," Her brows furrow as if she's trying to find the perfect words to express her thoughts. "It sounds stupid, but, I just...I always wanted to be somebody to someone."

Tom shakes his head. "What do you mean?"

"Well, I...I just want to feel like I'm somebody to someone, that's it. I want to be someone's someone, someone's person. If you see me riding the L, I'm just someone on a train. A no one, but I wanna be somebody. It doesn't have to be anyone big or anything, just somebody to someone."

Even the seemingly most confident people still want to be somebody.

Tom moves his hand to cup her cheek and his eyes lock with hers. "You're not just someone sitting on the L to me. You're somebody to me."

He's not glancing at her lips like he has some ulterior motive or like it only means something if he can kiss her. Tom's eyes just stay on hers and they don't move or change in any way. It's all just him being completely honest. He can't really explain it. Feelings, emotions really, are weird in that way. Sometimes, people just can't explain why they feel a certain way about someone and Tom is like with SJ. She's someone to him. She is his somebody and she should know it. Tom wants to scream it from the rooftops so all of Chicago can hear him if that's what'll take for her to believe it.

SJ is strong but delicate like canvas. She can hold herself together just fine and she's resilient, proven time and time again. SJ has taken beatings and from what Tom can tell, she's had a hard life but she stays together. That said, if something comes in and tears it, cuts a part of her, she'll rip apart. She's strong on the outside but when someone with a strong emotional connection comes in and ruins it, she'll lose her strength. She'll slip and fall, lose everything. So, she should know, she deserves to know that she is somebody to someone, somebody to Tom.

Her eyes are glossed over but she's not willing to let any tears slip. "You're somebody to me, too."

There are those three little words at the tip of her tongue. It's only been a few weeks but she's somebody to him and she knows it's true. He's somebody to her and every piece of her just wants him. SJ would love more than anything to tell him those three words, pack a few bags, and leave. Just run for as far as they can but the reality is still there and they can't just run away. They have to face their problems and pay their debts but maybe after that, she can use those words and they'll still be true.

"C'mon, we'll shower." Tom presses another kiss to her forehead and SJ bites her lip, trying to hide the smile that won't die down.

The two of them get out of bed and SJ goes to one of her drawers for fresh clothes. Tom excuses himself to go get his bag from downstairs. He always keeps extra clothes in his bag and he's never been so thankful for it until now.

Tom makes his way downstairs where he's met with the scene of Matty and Harrison sitting on the couch with their feet up on the coffee table and Mikey ina Laz-E Boy. While Tom and SJ were busy and having a serious discussion, the three guys downstairs were relaxing with beers (and a tea) and Stranger Things playing on the TV. Two completely different atmospheres in the same house and it just baffles Tom but brings a smile to his face.

Tom walks around the couch, behind Harrison. "Where's my bag?"

Harrison turns just enough to get a glance at Tom. "Here." Harrison reaches to floor and hands Tom his bag. "We're still saying, ya?"

Tom shakes his head, a chuckle escaping. "Yeah, we're staying."

"Oh, cool." Harrison says as he looks back to the TV, a satisfied smile now across his lips. "Good episode."

Tom's face contorts in confusion but before he could say anything, Matty's turned facing him. "Where's SJ?"

"Upstairs." Tom nods towards the stairs.

Matty's eyes move to the ceiling when he hears the water start running. Mikey rolls his eyes and resituates. "Have her put more of the ointment on your burns when you're done." Matty gives Tom a cheeky grin before turning back to the TV.

"Right." Tom says with a tiny bit of embarrassment in his voice.

"Go on, scurry, we're watching something." Matty leans forward and grabs his mug, sipping from it before looking back to Tom.

Tom nods, a little confused why Matty is so pushy about him going back upstairs while he catches Mikey glaring at him. It's obvious Matty actually likes Tom and he seems to get along with Harrison, at least now, but Mikey. Mikey doesn't even have to give Tom a look or say anything for Tom to just get the vibe that Mikey doesn't like him. It's not exactly comforting.

Tom climbs the stairs and heads to the closed door beside SJ's room. He knocks softly before hearing SJ say he could come in. When he enters, the room is already warm and goosebumps form on his skin. SJ's silhouette can be seen against the shower curtain, her hands running through her hair before coming to the curtain. She pokes her head out and a delicate smile graces her face.

"You coming? Cause I don't take half hour showers."

"Oh, yeah." Tom furrows his eyebrows as he nods his head.

"Okay." SJ laughs tugging the curtain back in position.

Tom sighs and there's just something weird about it. Not a bad weird, more of a good different. He's never showered with anyone. He's thought about it, of course, but it was never in the context of really showering. And he was never this vulnerable in the situation. For some reason, it's racking his nerves and Tom can't quite put his finger on the reason why. But, he shakes off the nerves and undresses, getting his new clothes out beforehand, and he gets in the shower.

"Finally." SJ chortles, feeling the cold air rush over her while Tom closes the curtain.

"I didn't take that long." Tom defends with a laugh.

"I'm already washing the shampoo out of my hair and then I'm done." SJ retorts, eyes wide and her hands in her hair.

"I'm sorry?" Tom shrugs, a playful smile on his lips.

SJ finishes getting the soap out of her hair and allows Tom inside the water. He winces as the warm water runs down his back. SJ's face contorts in empathy as she watches him try to get used to the stinging.

She knows it's agonizing but it wears off after a few minutes. It always wears off until the soap comes, then it's like someone is setting one's back on fire all over again. Soap might help keep infections at bay but it certainly doesn't feel like it.

"This sucks." Tom mutters as water cascades down his body.

"I know." SJ whispers just above the pattering of the water. "Turn around and we'll get it over with."

Tom runs a hand through his hair, before nodding and turning around to face the wall. His burns are inflamed from the water. The ones SJ had seen originally are bright red with ragged edges, peeling skin showing they're healing. The ones from that night though, they're a horrible, blood red with blotches of different shades. If they were big, they'd actually be stomach-turning to even look at. But, SJ knows it's just the fresh water and they will look better, kind of, in the morning and after she cleans them and puts the ointment on them again.

SJ grabs the bar of soap and runs it between her hands before resting it back on the edge of the tub. She's slow and gentle as she moves a hand over Tom's back, cleaning over the burns. His body shutters and one of his arm reaches out, hand pressed against the tile of the wall to keep him standing. His head hangs and SJ knows he's in a ton of pain. She tries to wash and clean the burns as fast as she can but she keeps her movements delicate to try and keep the stinging to an absolute minimum.

She watches her hand travel along the pale muscles of his back and her heart just aches for him. He deserves better. It doesn't matter what he did to get him here, the point is that he deserves better. He deserves so much better and yet here he is. He is putting all of his trust in her hands. Tom is being vulnerable, something no one ever likes to be with people, especially people who have lied but here he is. To put trust in someone in this state, that's completely insane. But, that's what makes him good. He is so good and he is wonderful and everything amazing. It takes a special kind of person to just do this, to be like Tom and he deserves better.

Tom is biting his bottom so hard the taste of iron starts to fill his mouth. His eyes are squeezed as tight as they can be but tears are still slipping by and joining the water falling over his face. Tom's arm shakes and his heart races in his throat. It's taking everything in him not to scream or let out a wail, collapse onto the shower floor or even just ask SJ to stop. Having to deal with the pain is one of the hardest things he's been through and he hates it so much. His head is spinning and the only thing he can feel is the stinging. Tom can't even feel when SJ takes her hand away after she's done.

"You can turn around now." SJ whispers.

Tom turns around and his eyes are bright red while the back of his hand comes to wipe his nose. "Thanks." He croaks out, still rubbing the tip of his nose.

SJ's shoulder shrugs just once. "You don't have to thank me." Tom nods while SJ hands him her shampoo. "You'll smell like me now." Tom shuffles the bottle in his hands as he manages to stifle a laugh. "I'ma get out and stuff but just meet me in my room, alright?"

"Yeah," Tom meets her eyes as he licks his lip, remnants of blood gone from the water. "Thank you."

SJ rolls her eyes. "You did the same for me. You just don't know it." She gives him a thankful smile before pulling the curtain open just enough to exit the shower.

She could stay in there with him to make sure he's really alright but if it were her, she'd want the rest of her shower to be just her and her thoughts. Tom isn't her but with this, she thinks he might think the same. So, she wraps her hair in a towel and dries off before putting on Blackhawks pajama pants and a plain red t-shirt.

SJ leaves the bathroom, a shiver running down her spine as she hits the cooled air of the house compared to the steamed bathroom. But, SJ doesn't turn towards her bedroom, instead, she heads for the stairs. She's met with the exact same sight Tom was and she just narrows her eyes in suspicion but if the three of them are willing to watch a show together, they have to be getting along so she's not gonna complain. Instead, she walks up from behind Matty.

"Can I talk to you for a sec?"

Matty's eyes widen as SJ whispers in his eyes, mostly just from not expecting her. "You okay?"

"Always." SJ says. "C'mon." She jerks her head towards the kitchen and Matty gets up, Harrison and Mikey looking at them with raised brows but go right back to watching the TV while they leave.

SJ opens the back door and allows the two of them outside. "Okay...something serious?" Matty asks once the door is closed.

"Do you like Tom? I mean, as a human." SJ asks and the question is blunt, seemingly out of nowhere.

"Yeah, why?" Matty asks and his arms wrap around himself to stay warm.

SJ licks her lips and she gives Matty a little bit of awkward smile. "I...like him, a lot and I...I just need to know you like him."

Matty nods and gives SJ a sweet smile. "He's great, SJ." Matty assures. "He makes you happy."

"Yeah..." SJ bites the inside of her cheek and Matty knows there's more to this than just asking if he likes Tom.

"So...?"

"I run." SJ sighs. "I run because other people run so if I run first, they can't run. Do you think he'll run....if....if I tell....him stuff?"

Matty shakes his head without hesitation. "No, I think he'll stay if you tell him." SJ nods and she's fiddling with her fingers, her bottom lip between her teeth. Matty puts his hands on her shoulders. "He stood up to Arthur for you." Matty says, voice gentle and pleading. "I think he'll stay."

SJ sends him a thankful smile, a small bit of relief coming over her. "Thanks."

"Of course." Matty grins. "Should get back in there."

"Yeah, are you having fun?" SJ chuckles as she opens the door.

"Harrison's great." Matty beams. "So, yes. Have fun with Tom." Matty pats her shoulder while he walks in front of her and heads back to his spot on the couch.

SJ climbs the stairs back to her room and her hands are sweaty and clammy, nerves growing. She doesn't talk about her mom because it brings up horrible memories. It's like it's a trigger. It tends to send her on this type of spiral mentally. She wants to self-destruct but there's a part of her that knows the reason for that is because she doesn't talk about it. SJ closes herself off so much that talking about anything at all can ease the tension in her shoulder and lift that weight of the world from her. It can do something, help her connect and build up more friendships than just those of Matty and Mikey.

She reaches her room and Tom is looking at one of her posters about orcas. He's reading the text about what food they eat and how they're not actually a whale, but a dolphin. The poster itself is an image of a pod of orcas swimming beneath the ocean. It's one of SJ's favorites. There's something about how elegant the animals look just swimming together in their own environment that makes her feel a bit at peace.

"Hey." SJ pulls Tom's attention from the poster.

"They're dolphins?" Tom asks as he points to the poster and SJ shuts the door.

"Yeah." She giggles softly. "Uh, technically, all dolphins are whales but there's kind of a subcategory. Think, wolves and dogs. They're all canines but they're two different species ya know?" SJ rambles and Tom's face lights up leaning on every word she's saying. "But orcas have teeth which puts them in a suborder with other dolphins, the ones you're used to seeing. And, they're shaped more like a dolphin. They're streamlined and smaller the smallest baleen whale. Their heads are rounded but go into a beak but whales actually have more squared heads and don't have beaks." SJ takes a breath and she feels like she should stop but there's just one more thing she can't help but mention. "Also, dolphins are the only marine mammal that actually uses echolocation a lot. Other marine mammals just use to get around, but dolphins use it to communicate, find food, get around, they never shut up, really." A shy smile takes over SJ's face as she looks to her hands, picking at her fingernails.

"That's really cool." Tom beams and he's so genuine. He really could listen to her ramble about marine life for days if she wanted to.

"You think so?" SJ looks up with hopeful eyes.

"Yeah, I do." Tom affirms, walking away from the poster and going to her bed.

SJ walks over to her mirror where she has a brush ready to get her hair down. Tom watches her take the towel from her head, shaking it a few times before resting it on the chair by her desk. SJ grabs her brush and starts brushing her hair, turning to face Tom.

"Do you need a brush...a comb?" She asks.

"Nah, 's alright." Tom chuckles. "Don't care much what it looks like right now."

"It looks good, just for the record." SJ smirks but her words are meaningful. The messy fresh out of the shower look looks good on him. Everything looks good on him.

"Thanks, darling." Tom chuckles and SJ makes her way towards him, picking up the laptop from her desk.

"Here." She opens it and pulls up the Netflix screen. "You can turn something on." She says as she goes back to brushing her hair.

"What do you wanna watch?" Tom asks, pulling the laptop towards himself.

"Whatever, really." SJ shrugs.

"How's the Iron Giant?" Tom asks and SJ can't help but laugh.

"I love that movie, go for it." She says as she walks back to her dresser and rests her brush on top of it. "But, ya know, I'm gonna have to put that ointment on your burns." SJ mutters, feeling a little uneasy about bringing it up.

"Right." Tom says with a soft groan while the movie starts playing. He reaches to the side of the bed where he put his bag and digs out the ointment.

"Lay on your stomach." SJ joins him on the bed and he hands her the tube.

Tom does as told and once he's settled, SJ puts the laptop in front of him so they can both see the screen. She straddles his lower back and Tom relaxes under her. It's not that he didn't trust Matty to put the ointment on originally, it was just that he doesn't know Matty really and it all just happened. But, Tom knows SJ is going to go slow if she has to and she knows how to make sure she won't cause him too much pain. She proved that when she washed the burns in the shower. So, he relaxes.

"So," SJ starts as she unscrews the cap. "Why, uh, why don't you talk to your family?" SJ asks and Tom barely even hears her.

There's something different about tonight. It's everything. It's everything between the night before and then tonight. SJ saved his ass and he saved hers the night before. She is helping him and there's something that just feels so much different. It's like that night in his room but deeper. There's something better going on here and it might get dark and twisty and scary, but it goes deeper than that night and Tom isn't going to let that go. So, he talks.

"They didn't like that I was boxing for money. I'd lost my job and was mostly focused on that. Got a bit addicted to it. Started gambling with bigger money, knew that if I lost it, I'd just go fight a few matches and come back with enough to pay off the debt. Came home hurt once, bad. Could hardly walk, Haz helped me back and that was it for them. Mum told me I'd have to stop or that was it." Tom's voice is distant and sad as if he's almost dissociating to explain.

"You gave up your family for boxing?" SJ asks and she keeps the judgment out of her voice.

"Wasn't the boxing really. They didn't want to accept that it was what I liked to do. If I could change it, I would. Don't like how it is now, don't like doing it this way. Don't like ultimatums either." Tom explains and the guilt seeps into every word.

"Did you try apologizing to them?" SJ starts on one of the burns and Tom hisses in response.

"Wrote 'em a letter." Tom groans out.

"You could call them." SJ tries.

She just doesn't think a letter is the right way to do things but she doesn't know his family. Tom, though, he doesn't answer. Not for a few minutes because he doesn't know how to respond to that. Calling and apologizing is the logical, meaningful, and rational thing to do but he didn't. He wrote that letter explaining that his choice was wrong and he was truly sorry for everything. He never meant to hurt his family.

He never got a letter back.

"Scared." Tom mumbles.

"They're your family though. If they're willing to hear you out, isn't it worth it?" SJ offers the reasonable thought.

Tom knows she's right. He's picked up the phone a thousand times to call but he can neverbring himself to do it. He can't click the call button but he misses his family and at least if he does call them, he made the effort to try and make amends. He can die knowing he tried.

"Okay, I'll call 'em if you do the same with yours. Said your parents aren't around?" Tom offers as he looks over his shoulder to SJ. If he's agreeing, he wants her to make the same movement. But, not for him, for her. He doesn't want her to feel as bad as he does for not contacting his parents.

SJ sucks in a breath and moves onto the next burn, Tom hisses once more. "Okay, I will tell you why I can't talk to my mom and why I don't want to but I'm not ready to tell you about my dad. I don't want to talk about my father, that okay?" SJ asks and her voice is genuinely asking him because she wants to talk.

"Okay." Tom agrees, him facing the laptop screen but his undivided attention is with her.

"Mom went on a bender when I was twelve and never came home." SJ just blurts the sentence out, a sentence she's never actually said out loud before.

When her mom had ditched her family, it was just known. SJ told Mikey and Matty that she left. She was high out of her mind and drunk and then she left, she'd be back because she's never not come home. Not until then. So, this was the first time SJ has actually said it out loud. Had Tom known that was the reason SJ doesn't talk to her mom, he never would have said she should call.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean. I didn't-"

"No, it's fine. You didn't know. She had a drug and alcohol problem."

SJ is rubbing the ointment into a third burn but Tom's eyes aren't closed from the sting of the burn. Instead, they're closed because he feels terrible for SJ. A parent with a drug and alcohol problem who then just leaves, that's...horrible.

"That why you don't drink?" Tom chooses to ask.

"Yeah, ya know? I don't wanna end up like her." There's a waver in SJ's voice as her fingers run over the raw skin of Tom's back. "Well, she ya know? Chose drugs and stuff and just...never came home. And she was still with my dad but they weren't, my dad wasn't, like "oh stay together for the kids!!" SJ's voice mocks the stereotypical phrase before it drops back down. "It was a lot and Travis had a lot going on and she just came and went all the time, high out of her mind. My dad tried to kick her out but she always came back and when he'd change the locks, she'd camp out on the porch so it was kind of pointless, ya know?"

SJ pauses for a few seconds and Tom lets her. He doesn't know what to say or if there's anything he can say. In fact, he feels even worse for not contacting his family. Sure, he's got issues with his but not like this. His reasons are so petty and pointless compared to SJ's. She's all but literally saying she had to grow up without a mom despite her mom still being around. Tom took his parents for granted but he still can't imagine what that would be like, with either of his parents. It's just not fair for a kid. It's not fair for anymore.

SJ moves onto one of the fresh burns and Tom buries his face into her comforter, groaning in pain. SJ winces at his reaction but keeps going. The more she talks, the more Tom seems to be paying attention to her rather than the pain he's in.

"So, it's been ten years, the day you guys picked me up, yeah, ten years. And I've never gotten a birthday card or a phone call or a letter, nothing. She just...left."

Tom clears his throat and he just has to ask, "What do you think happened? If that's okay to ask?"

"I dunno. Part of me hopes she's out still getting high and drunk and just, being her deadbeat self because at least that means she left for the drugs because if she's out living a better life in like Montana, that means everything she said was true and she left because of me. So, there's a part of me that hopes that's true because at least she's not dead somewhere and she's living but more of me hopes she's still a drug addict and alcoholic who's also a pathological liar." SJ's voice goes completely cold with the last few words and Tom feel her disdain. And her hurt. But there's more because she should never feel like she's the reason people left. If her mom is out getting high and wasted off her ass, that has nothing to do with a child.

"Why do you think she left because of you?" Tom asks boldly while SJ moves to another burn. Tom is looking over his shoulder and his jaw is squared, telling SJ exactly what that question means.

"She told me. She told me I was a failed abortion and I was the worst thing that's ever happened to her. She said she should have just dumped me in the dumpster outside of the hospital or left me at a fire station."

Tom's jaw falls a little slack and he just looks at her in a state of shock. SJ dodges his eyes while she just rubs the ointment into the red burn. Her cheeks are flushed and her eyes are starting to gloss over. Tom's entire chest is just constricting for her. It is so un-fucking-fair. Life isn't fair but this isn't about life. This is about a parent, someone who's supposed to love their children unconditionally, mistreating their child. That's not okay and no one, no child, no person deserves that.

"My dad kicked her out for the first time that night. December 13th, was about twenty degrees outside and it was snowing. She was in shorts and a tank top. My dad was never cruel when he kicked her out but he was that time because he heard what she said. He told her to go to a shelter if she wanted to stay warm and his name is on the deed so she couldn't go to the cops." SJ explains further and it surprises Tom a bit but by the low volume of her voice and pain etched in every word, he's guessing if she stops talking, she'll break. SJ sighs as she finishes the last burn. "Yeah, so I dunno. She could be dead in a ditch somewhere, a crematorium, a morgue, a mansion with her new family, I don't know and I like not knowing."

A few beats pass and SJ questions if she made the right choice in telling Tom. He's never this quiet but he just is. His eyes are on the screen and SJ's thumbs are rubbing the muscles of his back now and she's so close to breaking down because she trusts him. She trusts him and he's not saying anything and she doesn't know why or even how to ask. But, Tom catches her off guard.

He looks over his shoulder and starts rotating, hinting for SJ to move off of him. Her heart sinks further into her stomach as he rolls over and sits up, facing her. Tom stares at her for a few seconds and there are a million things he wants to tell her. He wants to tell her that she should try to find her mom and then tell her the fuck off because her mom is a shitty person. SJ doesn't need her. Another part of him though, that part wants to pull her into a hug and promise that she's nothing like her mom. He doesn't have to know her mom to know that. SJ takes care of people she doesn't even know. She deserves to be happy.

SJ licks her lips and she's about to say something but Tom doesn't let her. He extends his arms and pulls her into his chest, his arms completely engulfing her and she relaxes into him. His legs are crossed and she moves to straddle his lap, the hug being more comfortable and she feels happy and safe in his arms. She doesn't feel like speaking was a mistake. It hurts, yes, it's always going to hurt talking about her mom but Tom, he's good at comforting.

Tom pulls away and his hands go to cup her cheeks. His voice is shallow as he whispers, heart thundering in his chest and aching with the sight of her red-rimmed eyes. "You deserve better."