Maddie

Carley has the biggest smile as she admires her freshly painted pink fingernails. I've been assigned to be her babysitter again today, but it doesn't feel like babysitting. This young girl takes each day she spends here with stride, and even though she has every reason to be depressed and wallow in self-pity, she always has a smile on her face. Always.

Plus, I needed a distraction today, and Carley presented the perfect one with a makeshift spa day. I stopped by the store on my lunch break to buy face masks, nail polish, and cute headbands with matching hair ties. We talked about our celebrity crushes while I braided her hair, giving me a much-needed break from thinking about what tonight will bring.

The California Legends Gala is tonight, which means Cameron has to tell Katie last minute he isn't going to attend, which in turn will cause her to release the video and ruin my entire career. As of this morning, the private investigator still hadn't found anything we could use as leverage to get us out of this, so for the entirety of my day, I've been holding my breath, waiting to kiss days like this goodbye.

I'm going to miss it.

"I heard I have to get a stomach ultrasound today," Carley whispers, blowing softly on her nails. "Some of my tests came back weird, so they want to be sure nothing's wrong."

I arch a brow, blowing softly on mine as well. "Are you scared?"

"Aren't all tests scary? I'll never know if they'll find something. If they do, I won't be eligible for the transplant."

God, this isn't something a ten-year-old should be worried about. She should be concerned about school, sports, literally anything but the results of an ultrasound. The realization of that has a wave of nausea roll over me, but I swallow it down and send her a gentle smile. "Would you like me to stay in here with you when they get here?"

"Isn't your shift almost over?" She asks. "You normally leave during shift change, which is happening soon."

Glancing up at the clock on the wall above her bed, I can't believe there are only fifteen minutes left of my shift. However, I also haven't received any messages from Cameron on whether or not the video has been released. The gala is supposed to start within an hour.

I keep reminding myself that I chose this. Despite how wrong it feels to let go of all the years of hard work to get right where I am now, it'll be worth it to finally be free of her wrath. I might not be able to practice anymore, but I'll have Izzy and Cameron, and my family is all I'll ever need. I don't need this career to be happy and fully fulfilled.

At least, that's what I try to keep repeating. Maybe then, I'll actually believe it.

"You're right," I reluctantly agree. "I've got a daughter to get home to, but I happen to know a certain nurse working the night shift who would be more than willing to hold your hand through it."

A faint blush stains her cheeks. "Tre is working tonight?"

"He is." Well, according to the schedule. "I'll see if I can find him before I leave, alright? In the meantime, try not to chip those pretty nails."

"I'll try. Thank you, Dr. Holden."

I roll my eyes as I gather up all of our spa day supplies. "We're on a first-name basis now, don't you think? Call me Maddie."

"Okay," she replies, smiling hard enough that she giggles. "See you tomorrow, Maddie."

"Bye, Carley."

Leaving her with a tiny wave, I head to the nurse's station to see if Tre has gotten to work yet. Sure enough, he's sifting through paperwork in front of a computer, looking deep in thought. He lifts his eyes to mine when he notices me standing in front of him. "Hi, Maddie. You okay?"

He's probably confused why I'm at the nurse's station. Let alone why I'm here to see him.

Leaning forward to rest my elbows on the desk, I release a sigh. "Yeah. Carley is nervous about getting her stomach ultrasound done. I'm not sure when radiology is scheduled to come up, but I have to leave to go home to Izzy and Cameron, so I told her I'd see if you could be there for her when they do it."

"Of course." Tre arches a brow, forming his lips in a thin line as if debating on saying more, but he eventually shakes his head and darts his eyes down to the paperwork again.

"What?" I press.

"Nothing, I just..." He lifts his eyes to mine reluctantly. "I asked if you were okay because the media has been going crazy since the photos were released. I saw it on the internet before I came in, but I know how the media can be, so I didn't know whether to think it was true or if some weirdo photoshopped it."

Photos?

Shouldn't it be a video?

"What are you talking about?" My heart is pounding in my chest like a fucking drum as the expression of sympathy passes over his face.

"Uh, the photos of Cameron and Katie. He's at that fancy sports gala with her tonight. At least, I think. Unless they're photoshopped?"

Son of a bitch.

In seconds, my heart plummets into my stomach, and the tears prick into my eyes all too quickly. How could he? After he gave me his word that he'd tell her to release the video if we couldn't find something. We had an agreement, and he betrayed me.

Now what? I'll have to deal with Tre and everyone else in the world staring at me with sympathy? The entire world is going to believe our marriage is in shambles when it isn't. God, I can't even bring myself to open up social media. I want to delete it all. Fuck, I feel like puking just at the mere thought of seeing her hands on his chest as she smiles for the cameras. Seeing my husband put on an act as he pretends to admire her down the red carpet.

How dare he!

I am his wife. We're supposed to make these decisions together. The one person who isn't supposed to hurt me did, and regardless of whether or not he thought it would save my career, it was our decision to make, and I sure as hell didn't agree for him to go parade around with her on his arm. The trust he's spent so long working to rebuild just got washed away with one single choice he made. Doesn't he realize that?

Rage is boiling beneath my skin, but I refuse to make a scene at my place of work. It will only make this story more believable if any of my coworkers decide to snitch to the media. There could be some taking a photo or video right now and I wouldn't even know.

"You didn't know, did you?" Tre asks. "I'm sorry, Maddie. I thought you knew."

"It's..." No, I certainly won't be confiding in my ex. Wrong move. "It's more complicated than it seems, okay? I'm just... I'm just going to wrap up for tonight and head home. You'll stay with Carley for her ultrasound?"

He nods, roaming his eyes over my face as he tries to decipher what it is I'm feeling. "Yeah. I will."

****

"It's just for a few days, baby girl." Settling Izzy into her pack-and-play in the hotel suite's adjoining room to mine, I start up her sound machine when I'm certain she's sound asleep, placing a gentle kiss on her forehead before heading into the main living room.

My decision to stay at a luxurious hotel didn't take much thought. If Cameron thinks he can run our marriage alone, then he can feel what it's like to be alone. I made sure to leave him a note on the counter with the information on where we were staying. After all, I have our daughter, and I don't want him thinking I up and left without telling him where she is.

But I need time away to think. I need space to figure out how the hell to handle this. I've officially been made out to be the woman Cameron had the affair on, and I already know we're the main topic of conversation at the moment. I'm fucking pissed, and if I were to see Cameron tonight when he gets home, things wouldn't go well. I'd scream at him until I was blue in the face, and that's not going to help either of us. It certainly won't help matters if Izzy were to overhear that argument.

Thankfully, Nina didn't ask questions when I got home to relieve her. I waited until she was in the guesthouse before I left the note on the counter and packed up our things. I'm scheduled to be off work tomorrow, so she shouldn't notice we're gone since she has the day off too.

I plop down onto the couch and put my face into my hands, trying to hold my tears at bay. I'm so fucking emotional it's ridiculous, but in a way, I think it's warranted after the events of today. I don't want to turn on the news for fear of seeing pictures of them. I don't want to check my phone only to read texts from family and friends asking if I'm okay.

I'm not okay.

Not okay at all.

And despite Cameron's reasonings for deciding to go back on his word, I'm not ready to hear them. There is nothing he can say to me that will change the hurt or betrayal racing through my heart.

More importantly, I have no idea if we'll ever be able to move past this.