"Will that be everything then, Miss Armstrong?"

I blinked slowly and opened my mouth to speak. "I um...I think so."

"I have some songs," Colt sighed from beside me. In his hands he carried a legal pad with lists on it's worn pages. "He wanted these played."

"Can I see that?" I reached for the yellow pad of papers and tried to ignore the way our fingers brushed. For the last few days, even when I had asked him not to, Colt was there. He knew all my father's wishes and they had spoken about how he wanted this to go. And evidently they were things my father couldn't talk to me about because we never talked about any of this. I passed the list to the man sitting behind the desk at the funeral home and I nodded. "These will be fine."

I wasn't making it easy for Colt. He kept trying to get close to me. He wanted to do what he could to help, but all I did was push him away. When we were done, I rushed across the parking lot even though I knew Colt was trying to talk to me. 

"Would you wait up, please?" he called out, his fingers grazing my elbow.

"I'm busy," I huffed.

"Can I take you to lunch?" Colt whispered, lowering his head to catch my gaze. 

I glanced away and slipped my sunglasses over my face, effectively hiding my eyes. "Can't. I need to get a dress for tomorrow."

Colt's shoulders visibly slumped and leaned against my car. "Okay. Well I wanted to ask you something."

I glanced away, obviously perturbed. Colt knew once I was in the house, he couldn't talk to me. He was keeping his distance like I asked him to no matter how many times I wished I could just take it back. "Go ahead."

"The songs? I recognized all of them as ones I had heard Charlie play sometimes except for that last one."

I glanced at the ground and shrugged my shoulders. "That song, Right Here Waiting by Richard Marx...he never played it because it reminded him of my mom. He said it was playing during a school dance but he didn't have the nerve to ask her to dance with him so he watched her dance with someone else."

Colt didn't say anything in reply, so I lifted my head to see him staring at me with unshed tears in his eyes. "I didn't know."

I shrugged when he reached for me, sliding out of his reach and moving to sit behind the steering wheel. "I gotta go," I eked out, my voice cracking. 

I didn't wait for him to respond and I didn't dare look back in the rearview mirror because I knew he was most likely still watching me leave.

"I'm so sorry for your loss."

I don't know how many times I heard that phrase over the course of the next two hours, but it was a lot. It was the go-to thing to say in that situation. Colt and I stood side-by-side, along with my great aunt, because we were the only family my father had. Charlie had wanted to be cremated with a small service. But this service was in no way small. So many people showed up to show their respect for my father. I was overwhelmed.

On shaky legs, I stood and moved to the front of the room. I was holding onto my last bit of strength so I could speak on behalf of my father. There were more floral arrangements than the funeral home knew what to do with. I paused to glance at a few as I gathered myself and began to speak. 

"Charlie Armstrong was an amazing guy. And not just because he was one hell of a fighter, but also because he was my dad. He could've gone pro, he was honestly that good." I looked around the room at the sea of faces, most of them nodding in agreement. I stopped on a woman sliding into the last pew, her eyes covered with sunglasses and her head covered with a large brimmed black hat. "But unfortunately my father was left with a tough choice. He was responsible for me and he could've left me while searching for fame in the world of professional boxing, but instead he walked away."

The woman in the last row removed her glasses and hat, revealing a full hair of thick blonde hair that mirrored mine. "You see we all have choices. We choose what we wear, what we eat, our careers, who we live our lives with. And because someone chose herself, my father chose me. He gave up everything so that he could be a real parent to me. And I know I was no picnic to raise." The crowd laughed and I forced a smile. "When I asked him to teach me how to fight when I was ten, I knew he was hesitant. When I fought back against a bully who was harassing me at school, he was proud. When he wanted me to continue training to fight, I refused. He asked me why and I told him, "I can't stand watching people get hurt."

"So I chose to spend my life helping people, healing those who were hurt. And my father chose to spend his life helping people too. Because even though he didn't reach his goal as a professional fighter, he made it his life's work to help others achieve that goal. My father was a giving man. He gave up everything for me. He did so much for everyone else and rarely did anything for himself. Saying goodbye to him has been the hardest thing I've ever had to do." I could feel the tears welling in my eyes, my vision getting blurrier as I spoke. "But I'll never be able to repay him for everything he gave me...a home, a life, and more love than I ever knew what to do with."

I turned to run my hand over the urn sitting behind me. "I love you, Dad. And I always will."

I swallowed thickly, pushing down my emotions. How could I have any more tears left to cry? I looked down at Colt with his hands in his lap and tears streaming down his face. He peered up at me with so much sadness in his deep green eyes that I could feel it radiating off of him. At the last second, I turned and rushed from the room, dashing out of a side door that led to a small room with three couches. I leaned heavily over the back of one, my fists squeezing the upholstery as I willed myself not to lose it.

"Corri?"

My scalp tingled at the sound of her voice. So many emotions rushed through me as I turned to face the woman I hadn't seen anywhere but in photos. A scoff bubbled up in my throat. "How could you show up here?"

She smoothed her hair down self-consciously and strode closer. "How could I not be here for you? You're my daughter."

"Am I?" I spat. "Why was it so easy for you to just walk away from me? From us? Do you have any idea how much Dad loved you?"

Guilt skittered across her face and then it was gone. "I knew," she replied softly. "It was all I knew. A shy boy who had chased me in high school and wanted to settle in the same town we grew up in, but I wanted more."

"More than me?" I whimpered, angry I was even entertaining this conversation with a woman who had run from our family when I was too little to understand. "Do you know how much you hurt me?"

She blinked quickly and looked away. "I had to go. I had to see what else was out there for me. I knew I would end up resenting him if I didn't spread my wings and fly away."

I squeezed my eyes closed and let more tears fall. When I opened them, Colt was approaching us nervously. "Is everything okay here?"

My mother swung around to face him, her whole demeanor changing. "This must be your boyfriend," she gushed, pulling on his arm and tugging him close.

Colt glanced between us, obviously trying to gauge the situation. "We should head to the gym," he told me, reaching for my hand.

"The gym?" she echoed. "Why?"

"Charlie wanted a celebration of his life. So we're having it at the gym. You're more than welcome to come," he added with trepidation. 

My mom's gaze slid over to me and my lip curled into a sneer. "I'd rather you didn't. This isn't what Charlie would've wanted."

She opened her mouth to argue and must have thought better of it because she closed it and walked away. Colt's eyes followed her as she stormed out, but as soon as we were alone again, his attention was back on me. "Are you okay?"

I nodded and tried to edge past him. "We should go."

For the next few hours, I was approached by so many of my father's fighters. All of them had amazing stories to share about how much my dad had changed their lives. Colt stayed nearby, his eyes barely straying from me. It was as if he thought I'd fall apart at any moment. 

We had decided to gather in the addition to the gym. When Colt and I decided to buy the store next to the gym, the sale had gone smoothly and even though we still had lots of work to do with the renovations, there was enough space to pull off a gathering of this size. Colt had found a caterer and a bartender to handle the food and drinks for the night, so there wasn't much for us to do other than enjoy everyone's company and remember all the good times.

I was standing at the makeshift bar when I felt a warm hand on my back. "Hey, Corri. How are you holding up?"

I turned toward the sound of Beau's voice and let his big arms envelope me in a tight embrace. I didn't reply to his question because at this point I just felt numb. He continued rubbing my back softly as we stood huddled together. "You know your dad was the best. Never met a better man."

I nodded and forced a smile. "He always liked you too, Beau."

Beau glanced around and smiled weakly. "This turnout is unreal. He affected so many lives."

I nodded in agreement and sighed. "I guess I'm just ready to get out of here. It's been such a long day."

"You should tell Colt you wanna go. I know he'd leave with you."

"I...don't want that. I just...I don't know what I need right now," I whispered, leaning into his body. "Can you just get me out of here?"

Beau reluctantly agreed and even argued when I wanted to slip out without telling Colt. I was tired of being watched like a hawk. I needed to let loose and I felt like Beau was the perfect person to do that with. I grabbed a bottle of whiskey from behind the bar, slid my hand into his and tugged him out the side door. 

I knew I should have been keeping a closer eye on Corri. It wasn't hard to see that that surprise appearance of her mother earlier had thrown her for a loop. Once we had arrived at the gym, she looked as though she were barely holding on. Over and over, people had approached her with kind words and stories of Charlie's past and she listened intently. But under that, I could see how difficult this all was. 

I got nervous when I saw Beau approach her. I hated the way he kept his hand on the back of her neck as she clung to his bicep. They had such an easy rapport between them and it made my chest ache when I knew we didn't have that too. Corri had shut down any attempt I had made to touch her the last several days. I needed her so badly, to take comfort from her fingers and her skin, nothing sexual of course, just comfort. 

I had given up getting anything from her but dirty looks when I realized she had left the wake without letting me now. The last few mourners were trickling out the door and I was ready to lock up when my cell phone rang from inside my suit coat pocket. I didn't recognize the number but it still caused a sense of dread to swirl deep within my lower belly.

"Hello?"

"Colt?" A pause and then, "This is Beau."

That sense of dread intensified. "Where are you?"

"At my condo. I have Corri with me."

I bit back a swear on the tip of my tongue and growled, "Why didn't you just take her home?"

"She didn't want to be alone."

Those words wounded me. For days she had pushed me aside, ignored me, but now I find out she was with him.

"Text me the address."

"Yeah," he agreed easily, his tone still nervous. "She's pretty drunk, Anderson. I...I didn't realize how much she had already drank by the time we left and…"

"And what?"

"And...she's been coming onto me. I just think she needs to go home."

Anger prickled my skin and I squeezed my eyes shut at the thought of Beau with his hands on my girl. "I'll be right there."

I'm sure I broke several speeding laws in my quest to get to Beau's condo. It had been the longest day ever and all I wanted was to make sure Corri was safe. I approached his door and pounded on it, feeling more than irritable that he had whisked her away without saying a word to me.

"Where is she?" I blurted when the door flung open.

I could hear music coming from somewhere and Corri's voice singing along. "Is that the pizza? Hurry up! I'm starving," she called from the other side of the couch. From here I could see her blonde head leaning back, resting on the couch and not much else.

"Would it have killed you to just leave her alone tonight?" I grumbled as I shoved past Beau. "This is the last thing she needed."

"She asked me for this."

I paused and swung around to face him. "She asked you to get her drunk and be alone with her? Yeah right. Just like last time, you saw an opportunity to take advantage of her and you jumped on it."

"I never forced her, man. When are you gonna stop accusing me of that?" he demanded harshly. 

"I saw her after. I saw her crying and that should've never happened."

"Corri was crying over you, man. And it's ancient history so get the fuck over it."

As we stood there locked in a heated stare down, Corri appeared from around the corner with her hair tousled and wearing only a black t-shirt that barely brushed to tops of her thighs. "For fuck sake," I muttered under my breath. 

"She wanted to be comfortable," Beau explained.

"Why is he here?" Corri pouted, crossing her arms over her chest and causing that t-shirt to ride up even higher. 

"I called him," Beau replied as he approached her cautiously. "I asked him to drive you home."

Corri glanced between us and I could see the wheels turning in her head. "No! You told me I could stay."

Beau smoothed his hands over her hair and cupped her face in his hands. "It's not a good idea, honey. You should go home and get some rest."

Corri shoved him when he tried to give her a hug. "I hate you. You promised me you wouldn't call him! I just wanted to be with you tonight."

Guilt shaded his features and I wondered what had already gone on between them. Somehow the idea that he had been her first was something I would always struggle with. Suddenly she turned to me and sighed deeply. "I'll drive myself home. I don't need either one of you."

Beau handed me her dress and shoes and shot me an apologetic look. "She's really hurting right now. Seeing her mom…"

"You think I don't know that?" I scoffed before trailing her out the door. The way he acted like he was an expert on all things Corri just irked me to no end. I was torn between following Corri and going back to pound that little punk ass into the concrete, but obviously I had my priorities straight.

The ride home was quiet, so no doubt we were back to the usual silent treatment I had been subjected to since Charlie's passing. When we arrived at the house, I watched Corri fumble with her keys until I stepped up behind her, took them from her and unlocked the door. I balked when she tried to close the door in my face. 

"Just go away, Colt," she sighed.

"No," I challenged.

"I don't need anything from you," she spat.

"Don't you think this is killing me too?" My voice cracked and I swallowed back a lump in my throat. So far I had kept it together, staying strong for her because I thought she needed me. But hell, I needed her.

Corri turned to face me as I tugged my tie from the collar of my shirt and pulled my suit coat off my shoulders. We stood just a few feet from each other, the first time we had been alone in the house together since she told me to stay in the apartment. That was four days ago.

"I never knew my parents. The only thing I was ever told about my mom was that she was young and pretty and had no idea how to raise a baby on her own. Her parents were strict and couldn't handle the shame of everyone knowing she'd gotten pregnant by a man who had left her. They forced her to give me away when I was less than a month old. After that I don't know. I don't remember the foster families I stayed with when I was little. And that last one was the worst. When Charlie caught me sneaking into the gym that night to get a shower, I thought for sure he'd call the cops on me. But he brought me home and introduced me to you. And even though I have no idea who my birth father is...Charlie Armstrong will always be my dad. And I wasn't brave enough to stand up and say any of this today because I didn't feel it was fair of me to take anything from you. You're his daughter...he loved you so much."

The pain in my heart was crushing me. Holding all of this inside me was killing me. I felt the tears fall as I tipped my head back and slumped against the wall. My legs wouldn't hold me up. I slid down the wall in a mental exhaustion that had taken its toll on me. My throat burned as I tried to hide my sobs. I peered up at Corri with her wild blonde waves and warm hazel eyes. And for the first time since her father had passed, she was looking at me, really seeing me and my pain. 

"So as much as you feel like your dad gave up everything to raise you, I feel just as fortunate because he chose to open his home and his heart to me. I loved him so much and now that he's gone, I don't know what to do with how much this hurts."

The tears kept falling as my head fell forward, resting on my arms as they lay crossed over my bent knees. I knew I couldn't stay here, couldn't be with Corri in this space when she asked me not to. I raised my head to find her kneeling in front of me with her hands squeezing my forearms. "I'm so sorry, Colt. You've been mourning for him too and I just made it all about me. I never stopped for a second to think about how much this loss was hurting you too. You didn't deserve the way I've been treating you." She paused and sniffled, tears flowing down her pale cheeks as she spoke. "You are entitled to your feelings. You've been a better child to him than I ever was. You stayed. I let all my insecurities and doubts keep me from coming home to him. And that's my fault, not yours. You shouldn't have to go through this alone."

I nodded slowly as she shifted beside me, wrapping her arms around my shoulders and pulling my head into her lap. I curled my hands around her thigh and let her fingers card through my hair. And for the first time in days, the pain subsided. We didn't speak, but I let her soft touch soothe me and I hoped that we could find our way back to each other.

A/N: the song is a heartbreaker. I couldn't listen to it for years because it reminded me of a boy I knew. I know these last few chapters have put you guys through the wringer but it's looking up. Thanks for reading ❤