Four more chapters :( 

I unpacked all my things into my dresser beside my bed after my conversation with Opal. That's if you could really call it a conversation. It was more a... disagreement. With a lot of shouting. 

There was a loud shriek from my bedroom door, causing me to jump, and quickly a brunette, green-eyed bullet shot towards me, "You're back!"

I hugged Em tightly before letting go, "I'm sorry!"

"You better be!" she mock-shouted, "You left me all alone for a week with my mum and James etching to know every single detail."

"Best friends again?" I gave her a hopeful grin.

"Who said we stopped?" she chuckled and then gripped me in another hug, "Lunch?"

"Food!" I shouted and grabbed her hand, pulling her out into the common room.

"And you must tell me everything," she threatened.

"Deal!" I grinned and dragged her out to the dining hall.

***

"So in March you're..."

"Yeah," I nodded numbly, "In March I'm going to be presented to the world as a... guinea pig?"

"I was thinking more along the lines of 'first ever' to do something. You know, like Neil Armstrong was the first to step onto the moon. Gandhi was the first to free India. You were the first to have Dreamscape." Emily gave me her biggest evil grin. 

"Actually, Christian was," I corrected.

"Fine," she rolled her eyes, "You were the first female to have Dreamscape. Still sounds impressive."

"Thanks," I smiled gently, "But it doesn't mean that it's gonna go anywhere. The conference in March could be a complete flop."

"But then the prime minister would lose what he's been trying to get started since... whenever it was," Emily tried to persuade, "I doubt they would want to lose that. They're going to try their very hardest and my best friend is going to become famous."

I grinned, "You're amazing, Em."

"I know," she winked, "You're alright, yourself."

"Just alright?" I mocked offence.

"Well, I can't say you're amazing, too, because that would be unoriginal," Emily rolled her eyes.

"Are you telling me you don't know any synonyms for amazing?" Beth muttered, head buried in her book. 

So... we were back to silent Rose, Beth and Diana? Apparently.

"Of course, I do," Emily sighed and then put on a falsetto, "Okay, Nat, you're fabulous!"

"Thank you," I giggled at her tone.

***

Mrs Perry shouted, "No! Natalie, for the last time; you walk on, do your hair flip and then begin talking. You don't walk on, begin talking and then do your hair flip. Get it right."

To be honest... this woman scared me. I nodded quickly at my drama teacher and walked offstage again. 

Olivia stage-whispered, "I have no one, now..."

That was my cue. I sashayed on and smirked as I saw Olivia, "Well, don't you look... horrible?"

I flipped my hair behind my shoulder as I cocked a hip. Mrs Perry shouted again, "Natalie! It is not that hard! Flip your hair and then speak."

"I'm sorry!" I squeaked and ran off again, gripping my hair.

Emily gripped my shoulder, "What's wrong with you? You're never this unfocused. What's happened?"

"Nothing," I replied, taking my cue to go back on. 

I lasted this time and Olivia whimpered, "S-stay away from me."

"Stay away?" I scoffed, "You're practically repelling me. It's just... you're sitting in my seat."

"Oh!" she quickly stood up from the chair and went to go to another one but I held up a hand, "No, stay. Your stench is already..." what's the line?

"Ugh, Natalie!" Mrs Perry shrieked, "What's wrong with you today?"

"I don't know," I whispered. 

I didn't know what exactly was wrong but something was off. Someone placed their hand on my shoulder and I must have leaped a foot into the air with a small yelp. 

"Sit down, Nattie," Emily ordered. 

I shakily bent down until I sat on the drama room floor, my head between my knees.

Mrs Perry shouted, "Olivia, go get the school nurse!"

I could feel my body shaking slightly as I tried to keep my insides inside. What was wrong? This wasn't a panic attack, I knew that much.

There was a slight metallic taste in my mouth as well. 

And if I had no idea what was going on... what about Christian?

"E-em," I stuttered, trying to keep some focus on the world, at the same time.

Emily crouched down in front of me, tilting my head up to look at her, "Yeah, Nat? Wanna tell me what's wrong?"

"Ch-christian," I mumbled, "Ph-phone him-m."

"Do you have his number?"

I nodded weakly. She ran off, presumably to my phone in my satchel backstage. A moment later she reappeared, "Shawn said Christian's locked himself in the bathroom."

"I-is he ok-kay?" I stumbled across my words but I already knew the answer. It was no. If I was like this, then Christian was ten times worse because this wasn't normal for me. 

But it would be normal for him. Something to do with his depression? 

"No," Emily said, crouching in front of me, "Shawn said he's been crying for the last five minutes."

"Crying?" I whimpered, "I-is Shawn still on the ph-ph-phone?"

"Here," Emily passed my cell to me.

I pressed it to my ear, "H-hell-llo?"

"Natalie, are you okay?" My brother's voice was frantic across the line.

"N-n-no, Shawn," I replied, "P-put me on th-th-the phone-ne to P-p-p-park."

"He's locked himself in the bathroom! He won't even speak to me. It's like seventh grade all over again."

"Whaddayamean?" my words slurred together.

"Depression, Nat. He's having a mental meltdown," Shawn explained quickly.

Thought so. I could... I could feel it.

"Tell'im... I wanna talk-k-k to h-h-him," I stumbled across my sentence. 

There was noise in the background of the phone before a loud rattling sound. I flinched and curled my knees to my chest, still slightly shaking.

"Dove?" Christian's voice appeared.

I took a deep breath and replied, "Park... are you... are you ok-kay?"

"I can't deal," his voice was steady, but I heard him sniff deeply before continuing, "I can't deal with anything anymore. Who in their... their right mind would choose... a kid with bipolar... and depression to... I just can't deal with anything. I'm so, so upset. So upset... they've changed me and you and think everyth-thing's fine."

"I know wh-what you m-m-mean," I was steady but still having a hard time with my voice, "For some reason they chose a girl with anorexia and anxiety issues."

"We're screwed up in the head, aren't we?"

"You know it," I whispered.

"Feeling better?"

"It was never my problem," I squeaked, "I should be asking you."

"I'll never be one-hundred-per-cent but thanks anyway," Christian murmured, "get back to class, Dove."

"Okay, Park..."

"I'll see you soon."

"Yes."

The phone line went dead and I took a large, shaking breath. 

The nurse ran into the room with a kit and began asking me all these questions whilst checking my vitals but all I could think in my head was 'at least he isn't dead'. 

***

He pulled back this time and I was looking into the face of a fourteen-year-old Christian Xavier Park. He was staring at me with tear-stained cheeks before he broke down again, using my shoulder as a cushion, "I-I... I can't... can't do th-this anym-more."

"Can't do what anymore, Park?" I whispered, stroking his hair.

"I can't... I can't deal with anything. I just want to... I just wanna stop living. I can't focus on anything anymore..."

"Park," my voice broke.

"One minute I'm happy," he gave me a dark smile, "And the next I'm either angry, upset or depressed. I hate living my life like this."

I cupped his face with my hand, "It'll be alright, Park. I'm here."

"But you won't always be," his voice cracked.

"Yes, I will," I pecked his lips softly as a resolution.

~~~

"The doctor said you're getting better," Christian was cross-legged on the end of my bed, "Are you getting better?"

"How can I tell?" I said numbly, staring at him, "I wake up, I eat, I puke. I reckon the less mornings I puke in a row means I'm getting better."

"Yeah," Christian nodded slowly, "And did you... this morning?"

I took a deep breath and then fell back so my head hit the pillow, "What if I did? No one can really help me."

"I can," Christian murmured, placing his hand on my knee and rubbing his thumb across it, "I'm here for you."

"But you can't solve it," I sighed, "Just like how seeing a therapist and... talking about my emotions won't stop my anxiety."

"Yeah it will," he said, "The more often you go, the more often you get to feel relaxed."

"Relaxed?" I shuddered, "More like creeped out. The therapist only asks me questions. She doesn't even answer my own. It's like she's a programmed robot."

Christian chuckled and I relished in the sound. One of the things I got to enjoy at FSWC when he visited was his laugh. 

He was perfect. 

Sure, he had his flaws too but he was perfect for me. And that's all that mattered. 

***

Song: Do you see what I see? - Hunters & Collectors.

Four more chapters to write :( It's gone so fast :|

xx Sharky.