Eleanor sat down next to me every day in Spanish, just like she used to, all the way through mid-February. I thought she would run away from me like the coward she was, but she didn't. Seats were pretty much assigned by that point, anyway.

Unlike the rest of us, her life remained fairly unchanged as far as I could see. What could be traced back to her disgustingly manicured hands besides the rash from the peanut butter incident?

Of course, she didn't act like everything was normal between us. She was a part of a plan to hurt me after all.

I decided to break the ice that lingered in the winter air between us. "Good morning."

She looked up with wide eyes like I was the one who was slightly unhinged. "Um, good morning. How are you?"

"Confrontational as always. How are you?"

Her eyes glanced away. "I'm fine. Thank you for asking."

"Look, if you ever have anything to say to me, I'm open to hearing it. We've both had time to relax and let everything go."

"Can words even do anything in this situation?"

I shrugged. "Most likely not, but it'd be the honorable thing to do."

"This isn't feudalist Japan, Amanda. Honor doesn't fix anything."

"But an apology would be step one on the road to fixing it."

"I would appreciate it if we just went our separate ways. Arti and I have."

"We don't have to go separate ways. People like you are great targets for getting manipulated."

"People like me?"

"I didn't necessarily mean it in a bad way. You just don't have a backbone or morals," I said.

"Would you just leave me alone? I don't want to talk about it. Is that a bad thing?"

Uh, kind of.

I sighed. "If you can't figure out that I'm trying to at least maintain a civil relationship about this, fine. I don't really care. I have no respect for you anyway."

I took out my phone.

"You never did respect me, Amanda. Anyone who's not an alpha female like you automatically gets discounted," Eleanor said.

"I respect anyone who gives me something to respect, which certainly isn't you anymore."

She didn't reply to that. So satisfying.

My mother wasn't a bold person. Neither were Melissa and Viktor. And I respected those three more than anyone else because they had something I didn't: an open, pure heart filled with a ton of empathy. They could push back when someone crossed the line. They were silently strong.

I used to like Eleanor. I respected her for playing soccer, being intelligent, being kind to everyone (except for me, apparently). But where she lost me was her inability to stand up for herself. She let people walk all over her, and anytime things got tough, she'd lay down and die.

If she didn't want to own her mistake and try to make it right, that wasn't my problem. I was much more willing to make peace with her than I normally would have been, and she didn't want that opportunity.

It drove me crazy. The people who were granted amazing opportunities were the ones who didn't understand what they had. Eleanor didn't see it, Viktor never saw it when it came to hockey, and I never saw it when it came to Viktor.

46. You're an opportunity that I almost wasted. I'm so glad I didn't.

The class started, and both Eleanor and I carried on as if nothing happened, because, in my book, nothing did. Although she didn't give in to my generous offer, she gave up on fixing the problem.

I didn't want to hate her. I just wanted to hate what she did. But if she wasn't willing to put herself into that position, I sure as hell wasn't going to do it for her.

I could only forgive so much.

***

When I came home from school later that day, Melissa, Natalie, and Leah were at the kitchen table, trading the candy that they collected from their Valentine's Day celebration at school.

"These stupid candy hearts taste like plastic," Natalie said.

"And they have really stupid messages on them. No, I won't be yours. You're a piece of candy," Leah added.

"I'd marry a Kit Kat though," Melissa said.

I laughed, and all three of them turned to look at me.

"How was your Valentine's Day, ladies?" I asked.

"A boy gave Natalie six valentines. He made all of them," Leah said. "He even wrote poems on them."

Natalie laughed and picked up one of the valentines to read it. "Roses are red, violets are blue. You're cute, and I like you a lot."

"That doesn't rhyme. Why did he even put a lot?" Melissa asked.

I smiled. "When did you get so popular, Nat?"

"He's kind of gross, though. I only love Viktor," Natalie said.

I let out a laugh. "Just give it fifteen years. Maybe you'll have a chance with Viktor then."

Natalie sighed and rested her face on her fist. "There's no hope. We're just star-crossed lovers, and that's all."

"What?" I laughed.

Being eight could be difficult sometimes.

"It's his loss, anyway. I'm really cool," Natalie said.

"I think you're missing the problem, Nat. You're eight. He's eighteen. And besides, hopefully, in a few days, he'll be taken," I said.

Leah gasped. "You dumped Blaine on Valentine's Day?"

"What? No. Somebody else in this house likes him."

"Melissa? But she's eight too," Leah said.

I bit my cheek. "It's Matt, genius."

"Matt does? How am I supposed to compete with him? I'm better than you, Amanda, but everybody thinks it's cute to fall in love with your best friend." Natalie shook her head. "I can't believe he would betray me like that."

"I'm sorry that your older brother is the same age as Viktor. It's totally not fair."

"Don't get snippy with me," Natalie said, and I laughed.

She probably should have been used to it, especially since she was also fairly snippy herself, but some people just couldn't take it.

With Matt and Viktor both at one of the last hockey practices of the season, the house was much quieter than normal, even though we all liked to blame the triplets for being the reason there was no such thing as quiet in all of Bloomington. Until Mom got home from work, I had to make sure the three of them didn't burn down the house or some shit, which meant I was stuck.

Well, at least I was used to it, given the whole recovering from a concussion and suspension from school situation.

"So if you didn't break up with Blaine, where's the present he got you for Valentine's Day?" Leah asked.

I shrugged. "I don't think he got me one. And Valentine's Day is dumb, so I'm glad he didn't. I'd rather get lunch with him after Viktor and Matt's last game of the season."

"Maybe he broke up with you, and you just don't know it yet," Natalie said.

"I think he would tell me if that were the case."

"But didn't you get him a present?" Leah asked.

Before I had the chance to tell them that I did, in fact, actually make him a present but wasn't going to give it to him so he wouldn't feel bad, someone knocked on the door.

"Amanda, I texted you six minutes ago. Did I do something wrong?" Blaine.

I shuffled to the door and let him in along with a cold rush of air. "I was just talking to my sisters about their Valentine's Days. Apparently, Natalie is very well-liked by a boy."

"But I don't like him. I only like Viktor and that's it," she said.

Blaine nodded. "Good. Boys are stupid."

"But you're a boy," Leah said.

"And I'm stupid, so it adds up," he said.

"It's not your fault that you're stupid and a boy. Those are two separate problems." I smiled. "I left my phone upstairs in my room. What text did you desperately need me to see?"

"I know you're supposed to watch your sisters, so I was wondering if you wanted to look at the ceiling in your living room with me," he said.

The what?

He opened his hands like I was the idiot here. "The ceiling is all textured and shit, so we can find shapes in there or something. It'll be fun."

"Yeah, fun if you're three years old," I said.

"Amanda, you should try it. Maybe you'll enjoy it," Melissa said.

I wasn't sure how the fuck I was going to enjoy finding shapes in the ceiling with Blaine, but—

There it was. With Blaine. That was the part I would enjoy.

"All right. Let's go stare at the ceiling until we both die," I said.

As he and I headed to the living room, the triplets took their candy and scampered upstairs to their room. Smart. Blaine would probably ask for some if he saw them with candy.

The two of us laid down on the floor and faced up.

"That's a carrot." Blaine pointed up to the ceiling. "See? Isn't this fun?"

"Carrots aren't triangles, you fucking idiot," I replied.

"What the hell are you talking about? They have three angles so, therefore, they're triangles," he said with a laugh.

"And I have two thumbs, therefore, I'm a chimp."

"Is that how you're going to be? It's Valentine's Day, for Christ's sake."

I shook my head. "And here we are, looking at the fucking ceiling."

Blaine laughed. "Yeah, it sounds kind of dumb, but I'm trying to have a good time with you here. Look, I was just wanted to make something work today since you have to watch your sisters."

I laughed too. "I'm so in love with you."

He hesitated before responding. "I never thought I'd hear those words from you."

"What're you talking about? I've told you that I love you at least a million times."

"Sure, that you love me. There's a difference between love and being in love, though."

"Okay, and now you've heard them both from me, that I love you and I'm in love with you. You win at life. Do you want a prize or something?"

"Honestly, I do kind of win at life. Do you know how many people just want you to like them?"

"Like, four?"

Blaine laughed. "Like, at least four."

I smiled. "You know, I don't believe that you've ever told me that you're in love with me."

"Why would I? Your ego doesn't need that."

"Just tell me."

"You know how I feel."

"Why won't you say it?"

He bit his lip.

"Because you're not? Is that why?" I asked, my tone going from playful to serious.

If this boy made me look like a fucking idiot, I'd lose my shit.

"I was literally just about to say it, but you can't keep your mouth shut long enough to listen."

I let out a sigh. "Oh. Then go ahead. I'll listen."

"I'm in love with you too. There. Do you feel better now?"

I nodded, but I felt no different at all.

Was I supposed to?

Probably not. They were just words, after all, and I kinda knew he loved me. He wouldn't leave me alone, for fuck's sake.

He sat up. "You know, that might be the most reckless thing we've ever done."

"What do you mean?"

"There was always the chance to just go back to being just friends, but is there now?"

"Well, we'll cross that bridge if we ever get to it. But to be honest, I'm not that worried about it," I said.

"You're not?"

I shook my head. "Not really. I kinda really like you, and you kinda really like me, so as long as you don't start acting stupid and leaving me on read, we're gonna be fine."

"I'd never leave you on read. And as long as you don't stop baking me cookies just because you felt like it, we'll definitely be fine."

I smiled. "Then we're definitely off to a good start. I have something for you in the kitchen."

"God, you're the best." He leaned down and kissed my forehead. "You want me to bring some flowers to school tomorrow or something? Because I kind of feel bad that I didn't buy you anything. It's probably the stupid boy part of me acting up."

"You're not a stupid boy. You're a hell of a lot more than that, and it's why you don't need to buy me things besides food sometimes. I love you because you always stick with me, even when things are kind of sucky."

Out of everything that changed, he stayed the same. What more could I have possibly wanted from him?

-----------------------------------

Hello everyone! I hope you're doing well! Thank you so much for reading!

So for today's question, what kind of stuff makes you laugh?

For me, it's all about sarcasm and occasionally a good pun. There's something about a quick-witted joke that's better than anything.