9th April 2012

^^Pic of dad^^

My parents didn't let me go to school for like a week. They didn't want people to see that my dad was still hitting me so thought it best that I not go in. Instead my dad told my mum to call in and say that I had a stomach bug.

I was in that house and not allowed to go outside for a week. Can you believe that? I had to walk around that house with my mum pretending like nothing happened. Actually, she was avoiding me. I guess she knew I'd ask her why she didn't help me.

Rianne at first was furious with my parents and didn't speak to them at all. Then she talked to dad and came to the conclusion that I deserved it. It was so frustrating that I didn't have anyone in that house. I was alone.

I slept with the teddy Isaiah gave me, I named him Melvin. I was crying myself to sleep almost every night. They treated me like an outsider. They would be laughing and joking together but as soon as I walked in all the fun they were having would stop.

Dad had also taken away my phone because he thought I would tell someone about what he did. I felt fed up being there with them. Everyone was acting like my existence was a problem. A problem they didn't want to acknowledge.

They were all sitting in the kitchen joking around when I walked in. Of course they became silent and stared at me.

"Can I have my phone?" I looked up at my dad.

"No." He said simply, taking a sip of whiskey.

"Why not?" I asked. He turned to me and gulped down the remaining whiskey in his glass.

"Because I said so." He stood up straight. I turned around.

"So fucking annoying." I grunted, walking away.

"What was that?" I faced him again.

"You're so fucking annoying!" I yelled at him. I retreated into myself once I realised what I had done. I started running as he chased after me.

"Michael!" My mum called.

"Leave him." I heard Rianne say. She had it out for me and I didn't understand why.

I was actually scared of him now. I realised how much he could hurt me and I didn't want to feel that pain in all honesty.

I ran straight into the bedroom and tried to close the door but he was right behind me. He pushed back and although I was putting up a pretty good fight and almost had the door closed, he was bigger and stronger than I was so he just slammed his body on the door, knocking me over.

He kneeled down beside me and began hitting my face.

"Fine, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it " I tried to tell him but he wasn't having any of it. I kept turning my head away from him, making it harder for him to get a good punch in. I grabbed his fist when he tried to punch again and held it firmly.

"Dad, stop. Please." I begged, looking into his dark chocolate eyes. I was crying and breathing heavily as he stared at me. I rubbed my thumb on his hand, hoping to show some affection. I closed my eyes as tears trickled down my face.

"Please, you're my dad, you're supposed to protect me. Please stop hurting me, I can't take it anymore." I whimpered. I was still holding his fist and he hadn't moved yet.

I opened my eyes to see him just staring at me. I thought he was showing remorse and sighed, putting a small smile on before he knocked my face again.

"Get that smile off your face." He said. I saw mum walk in and she put a hand on his shoulder.

"We kept her off school for a week so no one would see her face. Don't make it worse." She told him. He nodded and smiled before laying into my ribs instead. I was crying all over again, I didn't think I made him that mad.

I started fighting back because my ribs really started to hurt. I swung and hit him in his jaw, much to his surprise. In that moment, I managed to shove him off of me and I ran to the window, opening it and sitting on the window sill.

"Don't touch me. Don't come near me!" I cried. He watched me warily. He stood up slowly as if not to alarm me. My mum hadn't left the room so she was watching me too.

He advanced towards me and I opened the window all the way. I closed my eyes as the cold air nipped my hot skin.

"Don't get any closer! Touch me and I'll jump." I threatened, tears flowing rapidly.

"Michael." Mum stood up slowly and tried to pull him away. I watched them closely as they did the same.

She stood next to him, on the brink of tears. He didn't really seemed phased.

Rianne appeared at the door and I stared at her.

"Riah, what are you doing?" She spoke slowly.

"Tell him to leave me alone." I sniffed.

"Get down from there."

"Tell him to back off! Tell him to go or I will." I stared at her, pleading with my eyes.

"Riah-"

"Don't move!" I cried. "Just tell him to leave me alone, please." I begged through my tears. I stuck my leg out of the window. I didn't really want to jump and I wasn't going to on my own accord, I just wanted them to see that how they were treating me was pushing me over the edge, no pun intended.

"Ray." She sighed and seemed more upset now.

"Get down." Dad said.

"Get close to me and I'll jump." I spat. He sighed and walked towards me. My heart hammered.

"I said I'll jump." I said shakily, sticking my other leg out. That didn't stop him.

"Michael." Mum tried to stop him.

"I'll jump." I repeated, louder this time.

"Dad." Rianne attempted.

"I'll jump!" I cried.

"Fine." His tone was nonchalant as he pushed me. I screamed as he did, feeling myself go careering out of the window.