A/N : This is a deep chapter with lots of revelations, this will leave you right into the middle of the plot. Hope you enjoy! Do share your comments & tell me your thoughts on these characters? Are you liking the dark tone of the story?

Happy Reading!

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Nandini:

"Between the ones' we have ever wanted, and the ones we eventually choose, lies either our strength or our weakness." ~ Voice of the Ocean, Nandini.

I wish more women saw this. We don't need others to tell us if we are strong or not? Our choice screams out who we are, whom we let ourselves be, for the sake of loved ones. Sitting next to a hollow-eyed Navya staring lifelessly at Armaan's sleepy demand of stories, I realized, amongst all the grief, agony, unfairness life has thrown at me, it had given me a weapon, my writing – my writing liberated me, but Navya?

After dinner, when we were about to leave, Navya suddenly turned to me and said, "Nandini, will you stay the night with me?" she didn't say more, and I didn't need to hear more. I had noticed Navya all evening, I was in fact waiting for an opportunity to talk to her. She had never looked more listless before, and I knew her. She was never a damsel in distress, she was a fighter. She was the same Navya who had lost her dad too early in life, and yet she fought to ensure Manik never felt the void. She was always more mature than her years. If she was defeated, the cause had to be great. I nodded in affirmation, and deep within me pride nudged at me. I was happy I didn't feel the need to take into consideration Manik's presence here before standing by Navya tonight – if that happened; my guilt would know no bounds.

"Navya, Armaan has dozed off. Let's get some coffee and talk?" I suggested quietly.

"Let's go for a drive and get coffee? I need some fresh air Nandini." She replied softly.

"Armaan will be fine here right?" I enquired.

"Don't worry, I will ask the butler to keep an eye on him"

~An hour later~

It was windy here, and at this time of the night, almost empty. We were sitting on the deserted benches under the inky night. The moisture laden wind from the sea blasting through my ears and nostrils and taking me to memories lost far back in time. As a child I would come here with my 'Amma' and 'Appa' in the evening. Worli Sea face was the residential area for the elitists in town – where there were vintage bungalows on one side, there was the vast open river on the other. My parents would bring me on weekends in the evening, I would sit here with them, have ice-cream, laugh and have a good time. Maybe it was these memories here, or the soothing sea breeze itself, but the years of life that followed, I had found that, sitting here, staring at the river always calmed me down.

I turned to Navya, "What have you done to yourself, Navya?"

She smiled a little in mockery, in response to my question. "Nandini, this feels so good. Just like old times. Only this time, the tables have turned. This time I am here with a heavy heart and seeking advice from you!"

I smiled. During the time Navya and I bonded in college, my father was a few years into marriage with 'Mumma' and they had Aal, I had lost my 'Amma' and I was going through an identity crisis, I felt I didn't fit in my own family. This was the time Navya stood by me like a rock solid pillar. She didn't have a dad either. Just her mom and a younger brother.

"Navya, you know you can talk to me right? Why didn't you call me yourself? What is bothering you? Since when did we grow all this distant? I thought...." but she didn't let me complete it.

"Nandini, I want a divorce from Cabir."

***

Aliya:

We were leaving from Manik's house in the evening, when Navya di, stopped di, and asked her to stay back. I wasn't surprised. Navya di looked disturbed for quite some time now, and it has to do with Cabir jiju. Jiju hasn't showed up for the wedding preparations as yet, di hardly talks to jiju, and whenever Manik or anyone asks about him, she changes the topic. It was good in a way that di agreed to stay with Navya di. I wanted to bring back Armaan, but di insisted he stayed with her. I sometimes feel, di didn't trust us with her son. I have said this to 'mumma' sometimes, but she rubbishes my thoughts every time. But it's true, di really doesn't trust us with her loved ones. It's not di's fault, from childhood she was distanced from every loved one because of us. Be it our 'Appa', her 'Amma' or..

~Few hours into the night~

It was just before dawn when the doorbell rang and caught us by surprise. Who could have come now? I thought to myself as I motioned for 'mumma' to stay in bed, and got up to answer it. I opened a door, and years full of memories, sweet and bitter flooded me. He was at the door. Di really couldn't keep all her loved ones away from us tonight.

"Aryamann..?" I called out surprised.

"Jiju" I heard my mother correct me sternly from behind. I turned back in surprise to see my mother standing behind me.

"Ye—yes. Jiju, I mean. Jiju, weren't you supposed to come later?" I asked, still in haze.

"Err..yes. But my work got over sooner than expected. I had left a text message with Nandini, not sure she read it." He replied shortly.

"That's no problem beta, please come in" replied my mother politely from behind. We all were a little tense. It's been a long time since Aryamann has been around me without di's presence. Earlier of course, it was a different story.

We all sat down as Aryamann walked in and sat down on the couch. 'Mumma' asked him if he wanted to eat something or drink coffee, but he refused, and said he had travelled for a long time and wanted to rest. Mumma sent me to make his bed at once, as she sat with him.

I jumped at the opportunity to walk away from him. I was making his bed, yet my mind was somewhere else – at a time when I was in college and Aryamann was visiting faculty. He was young, good looking, & a visiting faculty for finance, and like most other girls in class, I hardly paid attention to his class, and mostly drooled over his good looks. It took me a while to see there was something from his side too, and thereon what began was our story. We were happy. We knew we had quite an age difference, but I knew once I completed my studies and made a career for myself, convincing my parents wouldn't be so difficult. However, life had other plans.

When Di was in her mid-twenties and talks of her marriage were doing rounds, mumma had told us that Di's 'Amma' had chosen a boy for her, right when she was very young. Our Appa had told this to mumma a long time back, and 'mumma' wanted to visit the family once and see if they were serious about it. After all it was di's mother's wish. He was Di's Amma's childhood friend's son. And as luck would have it, that son in due course of time, turned out to be Aryamann.

When I found out, I was shocked, pained and in denial. I had gone to my mother and confessed my love for Aryamann, but 'mumma' didn't pay heed. It was a side of 'mumma' I had never seen. She was heartless towards me. I had seen from childhood, 'mumma' and di had a cold equation, and I couldn't understand why she was so adamant to ensure that I walk out of this and let di get married to Aryamann, even though Aryamann loved me. But eventually she convinced me to make this sacrifice, for the love of di, out of respect for 'badi ma' who had chosen Aryamann for di, for the Appa who would be proud of me if he was around.

I knew even if I told him, Aryamann wouldn't marry di, so I had broken up with Aryamann in an ugly spat and ensured he hated me. Eventually over the next year and half, Aryamann and di became friends, and he had moved on and finally accepted 'mumma's' proposal of marrying di. Di had started liking Aryamann, and they eventually got married. Over time Aryamann and I have been cordial, but I prefer meeting Aryamann only when di is around.

But today was different. Di wasn't around, and I was getting married to a man who I knew didn't love me, and Aryamann had come to attend the wedding as my jiju. I had thought he wouldn't come, but he did. My train of thoughts were broken when I heard his voice again,

"Aal, thank-you for making my bed" he was right behind me.

"Aliya" I replied quietly and nodded in acknowledgment before leaving his room.

***

Nandini:

I stared at Navya in blank incomprehension. She wanted a divorce? She loved Cabir dearly, and if there was one thing Navya had always dreamed of, it was a perfect family, and today she wanted to break it?

"This is about the baby thing isn't it?" I asked, outraged.

"Yes it is." she replied quietly.

"So you want to divorce him because you cannot conceive and give him a baby?" I asked incredulously. "Navya do you know what you're saying, can you not adopt a baby if this is so important? Or have a child through surrogacy?"

Navya looked at me with tear-filled eyes. "I don't want to divorce him Nandini, he wants it. But he is not able to say it. He is just trying to spare my feelings. He doesn't talk to me, doesn't want to take me with him, he is always travelling, he avoids my calls, and he doesn't even ask me to return. It's been going on like this for long now. Nandini it is not my fault that I cannot mother a child right? I tried talking about it, and he doesn't want to talk about it either. I feel so shunned. What is the point of being in this marriage now Nandini? I am only stopping him from living his life. I love him too much to do that. I will let him go...." She finished as tears finally rolled out of her eyes.

'What is the point of being in this marriage now Nandini' this question echoed inside me. I had asked myself so many times these simple questions and hoped I found within myself no reason to stay. I hoped one day I would have no point in staying in the marriage, walking away liberating myself; but I had a point every single time, and my reason for holding on was my little baby Armaan. Navya was lucky, but she didn't realize it – she really had no reason to not break free. She would be liberated soon, this anguish would be gone, there would be happiness. Only I will be stuck in this endless loop forever, always finding a point to staying in the marriage.

***

Nandini's 'Mumma':

Lying down on my bed, I turn to face my daughter Aal, but she has her back towards me. In a way she was shunning me again, like she did all those years back. How could I explain a life so complicated to this little girl? She never saw the question I have seen in Nandini's eyes day after day, asking me, why have I come into their perfect life? Why have I destroyed her life? I can't give her this answer, the answer would destroy her. I couldn't wreck her further, after all if nothing else, she is still the daughter of my beloved husband. How could I tell the children what really conspired in the past? A past where their father and I met and we were in love, we wanted to get married, but their grandmother was against it, she bullied him into marrying the woman of her choice and that was Nandini's mother. How could I tell Nandini that her father never loved her mother, but he was a responsible man. He fulfilled his duties as a husband and raised a family with her. How will I ever explain to Nandini that I never came back to their lives, but her father always knew where to find me, he knew I wasn't going to marry ever, and my family was worried. Her father had only come to meet me as a well-wisher and wanted to convince me to move on. But love? Has love ever known a reason? The heart has principles of its own, it doesn't beat for everyone – always in life we find that one person for whom the heart beats, and no matter how long after you meet, it still beats.

We didn't want this to happen, but once more we couldn't ignore the love that bloomed between us in no time. This time the love had a relic, it was Aal. I was guilty, and I didn't want to come into his life even then, and he had no choice because he had Nandini on one side and Aal on the other. He could have gone back leaving us, but my husband was a responsible man, he couldn't do that to us. He had gone back and confessed to his wife of his adultery. Nandini's mother was in pain, angst and denial – she had long known that her husband didn't reciprocate her feelings, but she had a beautiful world around him and she could see it crumpling. Her husband had told her that he would sever every other tie with me but that of his child's mother. He had told her that he intended to raise Aal just like Nandini, and not shun her. But Nandini's mother was insecure of my presence, to a husband who didn't love her anyway, now he had a child with me, what if he abandoned her going against his words? This insecurity led her to commit suicide, not me. I didn't want all this to happen, but I have lived an entire life seeing Nandini grow with these questions in her eye. Why was I only there for an answer? Why was I so burdened? Why did I feel little in front of that child?

Years had passed, but life was not done with me. When the children grew up, we were again in the same spot. I knew the right thing was to let Aal and Aryamann be, and get Nandini to marry another suitable boy, but I was tired of seeing the question in Nandini's eyes. I didn't want her to think I chose Aal's happiness over her's. I didn't want her to put Aal in the same indebted spot her mother has placed me in. I didn't want her to think, just like I took away her Amma's happiness, Aal was taking hers'. I wanted to make amends for all that she had suffered from, I wanted her to be happy, hence I let her have Aryamann – how will I ever explain all this to either of my children? I was only trying to protect them.

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A/N : If you're liking the characterization, plot & the tone of the story, do vote, share & leave me a final thought on this chapter. I'm eager as ever to hear back from you all!

Much love,

A.

Next update : Saturday, 11th September.