When you truly love someone, you pour your everything into keeping a smile on their face, a sparkle in their eye, and their heart light, and full of love.

But what happens, when the love, becomes a deep sadness, that is seemingly inescapable? Would one hold on, and hope for better times?

Or would one be desperate to free themselves from the heartache? What began as a source of happiness, has now become and abys of sadness that seems too deep to escape.

The sadness begins to drown your soul, and deprive you of the very breath in your lungs. Your heart, no longer beats in happiness, but instead, beats in anxiety and fear. Anger and regret.

So how does one survive this?

For me, I barely did. The pain that weighed on my heart began to suck the life and energy from me. Along with the will to pursue my greatest dreams.

I began to stop doing things I'd done all my life, the joy I once had in the simple things in life began fading faster and faster in a seemingly eternal cycle of pain and tears.

I stopped drawing, singing, and playing guitar. I stopped looking forward to going to school and began to dread the very thought of it.

I dreaded the judging eyes, and critical glances. The very idea of walking those halls turned my stomach because all I could feel was either judgement and criticism, or resentment and hatred.

Not even the support from the few friends I had was enough to dull the pain and let me breathe again. By the next year, more people knew me and even less people spoke to me.

Those people that I thought would stick around to help me out, became more and more distant. I  began to feel like the new girl in town all over again.

I felt like nobody knew me or even wanted to speak to me. While I was going through counseling, all the goals that I had made, became hollow and empty.