Jeremiah

"Jidenna."

I moaned and turned to the other side of my face until the voice called me again. It was followed by a soft tap on my shoulder. I opened my eyes slowly and my mother's face was the first I saw. She had a bright smile on her face as she kept staring at me, encouraging me to sit up straight.

I could feel a crack on the mid section of my back when I took her advice and basked in the relief that came right after. I had been in that position for over an hour, sitting on a chair with my head close to my father's legs beside his bed. I had gotten so tired from babysitting that I had no idea when I fell asleep.

Ever since I was able to get my father out of the hospital and into the apartment he was being attended to, I knew I had to take responsibility for him. I had to take turns to look after him since mum couldn't do it on her own. It was hard enough that I had brought her there and asked her to help me despite everything that had happened.

I had no idea what I was doing. I was doing a bad job taking care of myself, I wasn't sure I had what it took to take care of someone else.

"Mum," I rubbed my forehead and stretched my really cramped arms, drawing a deep breath. "I'm sorry, I had no idea I had fallen asleep."

It was my turn to watch him the entire night so my mum could get some rest from watching him the whole day.

"It's okay." The smile on her face made everything better. She didn't look mad at all. She looked like she had spent the whole night baby sitting the both of us. I returned her smile, trying to make it as sincere as possible. I slowly turned back to the bed. There was no improvement, he still hadn't even moved a finger. I left my gaze on his oxygen mask which occupied the better part of his face. I wiped my face with my hands.

"Jidenna?" I turned to my mum the moment she called my name. "You should go home and rest, I'd take care of everything from here. It's been two days since you went home, you've not even been to school. I'm sure your mother would be worried about you."

I could be gone for a year and I'm pretty sure Susan would be the last person to notice or care. She was everything but my mother and I was happy that way but my mum was right. The past two days for me had been really rough. I missed my life outside the walls of that house, not like there was much to miss, but I was all he had left. I was the only person that cared for him at that point. I just wanted to help him even though I knew I shouldn't have, I didn't have to. Even though every part of me hated him for what he did to me, to all of us, a part of me just didn't want to give up on him yet, a part of me wanted to give him one more benefit of a doubt, just one more. I clicked my tongue.

"Mum-" I slowly reached for her hands. "Mum I'm sorry I'm making you do this." I told her. "I know how much you've been running from this, from him. How he has treated you before but still you're trying to look after him now for me. I know it's too much even for you and I'm sorry."

She smiled at me and then reached for my hands. She rubbed them.

"What are you sorry for?" She asked me. "I'm not upset at all or disappointed. If anything, I'm proud of you, of the man that you've become. The man you turned out to be even without me or your father or step mother being there to help you or watch you grow." She slowly placed a hand on my right cheek. "I'm grateful that you grew well." She told me.

"You lived well, ate well, went to the best schools, and in as much as I hate to say it, it's all because of your father. He took good care of you just as he promised he would. This is my only way of showing my gratitude to him, it's the only way I can pay him back for everything so no," She shook her head. "I'm not upset at all."

I didn't know what to say. I reached for her hand on my face and rubbed it gently, turning again so I could see my father, so I could see what had become of the mighty Benjamin Ozor.

"I'm scared Mum." I had been dying to admit those words. "I'm scared that I have no idea what on earth it is that I'm doing. That somehow, I'm going to screw things up and I could end up losing him. I'm scared I might not know what I'm doing after all." I could feel her hand on my shoulder. I could feel her gaze on him too. I was really sad and exhausted.

"Did I ever tell you how I met your father?"

Excuse me?

I slowly turned to her. I did not expect to have that conversation at all. All my life, it was all I wanted to know. She never told me anything when I asked. Why was she bringing it up now? She sat down slowly beside his feet, her eyes still focused on him.

"Saint Dominique University." She paused. "He was in his final year and I was trying to figure out if I really needed to go to school or save all that tuition money for my sick mother's treatment. Your grandmother, she wanted me to be in school."

It was the first time. The first time she was ever talking about her past in less than three words. I totally had no idea, I had no idea that my parents had known themselves for quite a while. She turned to look at me.

"We bumped into each other and I fell for him immediately. We were so young, so in love just like you and Kora." It made an unplanned smile appear on my face. She drew a deep breath, "After a few months, my mother died and my benefactor went bankrupt shortly after. I had to drop out of school, plus your father had graduated too and I heard he was going to take his place in his father's company as CEO. I had no where to go, no relatives in the capital and so I left for my aunt's place in Rivers state."

"I tried to reach him but he had changed his number. Also heard he had left the country too but got back after six years. I got a job with this catering company and we had an event to cover. Fortunately, It was his company's anniversary. We bumped into each other again and in that moment, it felt like all those years never passed, like I was back to being twenty one again. We got to talk over a few drinks the next day. I didn't even know he was married, I never bothered to ask. I just wanted to be with him. It wasn't planned, we just didn't know what happened. We got lost in the moment and by the time we had both realized it, we were at this hotel his company owned, drunk as anything. That was how you-. "

she pursued her lips. I could see the tears in her eyes as she kept them focused on me.

"When I found out that I was pregnant, I was scared. I didn't know what to do and when I found out that the man who I had loved and waited for for six years was married to this rich lady whom he had a son with, it broke me. I felt guilty. I felt like I had done an unforgivable thing. I didn't know how to face him, I didn't know how to face everyone that looked up to me. He had refused to see me after the hotel, never returned my letters either and it made me really confused. I had no other choice but to leave, back to my aunty's house. The moment she found out what had happened, she kicked me out, into the cold streets. I hated myself. I was going to take my own life but one thing kept me going." She reached for my hands.

"You kept me going. You became someone I wanted to have, someone I wanted to protect. I was going to raise you into a man, a better man than your father ever was and then I was going to present you to him when the time was right. I was going to ask him to look at his son, I was going to show him how much of him you looked like. How brilliant you were, how you wanted to own and run companies just like him. I was going to present you to him but he found me first. He found us first and the rest happened."

She turned back to him.

"I know what I did was wrong, going after what wasn't mine and stealing from another woman, ruining another family and I know I'm currently being punished for it. I had to lose you because of it. I had to lose everything." She turned back to me. "But having you was the best decision of my life and I don't regret it. If I were to ever go back, I am going to make the same choices over again. The choice to have you, the choice to leave you. Those were the sacrifices I had to make so you didn't have to suffer for my sins so much. I wanted you to have a better life, a life I could never have given you. My only regret is that you're being hurt and haunted by my decisions till today."

I quickly squeezed her hands. I had tears in my eyes too. I sniffed.

"Mum, it wasn't your fault." I told her. "You didn't know. I don't hate you for it, I don't blame you for any of it."

"But still, your life became so hard because of me. You were only a child and you went through so much."

"I didn't go through half of what you went through. You hate being alone and by yourself. You were always scared of sleeping alone, how were you able to go through all those years by yourself?"

She sniffed as a drop of tear dropped from her face.

"My poor baby." She pushed herself on me and hugged me tightly. "I'm so sorry for everything."

"Mum." I could tell she was crying already from how her voice broke. "Mum it's okay, really."

"I'm really sorry. I'm sorry."

I let out an exhale. I didn't know what to do, my hands slowly started to find its way around her. I held on to her and let her cry on my shoulders. I didn't stop her, I couldn't. I had lived for this moment, waited for this moment and wished so earnestly all my life. I was grateful I got to at least see her cry again. I was okay, even though it didn't look like it, I was happy.

───── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ─────

Kora

Focus Kora, Focus.

Nothing made sense to me. Not the notebook book that was open right in front of me, not the lecturer teaching in front of me and definitely not the classroom. I could barely focus, not when he was all I could think of. I was worried about him. It had been two days since I last saw him, since he ran out of the hallway after handing me the bracelet. I turned to the bracelet that was sitting pretty on my wrist. I tried to feel it like I had been doing all forty eight hours. Where was he? Why wasn't he taking any of his calls? No one had heard from him, not his sister and not even Kingsley. I just hoped he was fine, I really did.

"That would be all for today's class."
I closed my book the moment the woman in front of the huge screen said those words and then I grabbed my bag. That was my last class for the day and I was happy it was. At least now, I could have the time to worry about him without getting distracted. I got outside the room.

"Kora!" There was someone calling my name behind me. "Kora!" I paused when I could hear footsteps running towards me. "Kora wait." I turned, squinting my eyes so I could see him clearly.

"Luke?"

The smile on his face brightened when he got to me. He held on to the arm of his bag, giving me his undivided attention.

"Luke," I let out a really nervous chuckle. "W-what's up?"

"You're leaving?"

Duh? Wasn't it obvious?

I smiled and then nodded.

"I'm done with classes for today."

"Great." He chuckled. "Me too."

Would you look at that.

"That woman's classes always has me weak." He was making jokes now but I kept looking behind me just in case you know, just in case you-know-who popped out from nowhere, Jeremiah. "Are you waiting for someone?" And now Luke noticed just how anxious I was. I turned back to him quickly, tucking my hair behind my ears.

"Nope." My cheeks started to tingle a bit because I was lying. "I'm just- looking around." I shrugged my shoulders. I could see how his smile grew as he squeezed the shoulder straps of his suede bag.

"Well, since we are both class free for the rest of the day, I was wondering if you could go out with me, you know, spend the rest of the day together like we used to." I narrowed my gaze on him. Just what was he talking about? "We could go see a movie or we could go to the park, get on top of a Ferris wheel and you know, talk. We could even go to the football field and watch them play."

"Luke." I cut him off before he could say anything else. My mind was all over the place to be thinking about going out with anyone, especially him. There was only one person on my mind and he wasn't anywhere close to me. I let out a breath I didn't even know I was holding and kept my eyes leveled on his. I didn't know how he was going to take what I was about to say but I hoped he took it with all seriousness and respected it.

"What are you doing Luke?" I asked him.

He paused for a second.

"Wh-what are you-"

"What is this?" I cut him off yet again, demonstrating as I pointed at him and then at myself. "What are you trying to do?"

He exhaled, his smile fading just a little bit.

"Come on Kora," he told me. He must have realized that I was just playing ignorant. "Kora I'm trying all I can to make it up to you."

What?

"Didn't I tell you? Didn't I tell you that I was going to do everything to make it up to you? That I was going to do everything to make you mine again? That I wasn't going to give up on you? On us?"

"Make me yours?" I asked him and then scoffed softly. "Luke-"

"Don't say anything." He stopped me. "Don't say that nothing can happen between us, don't say we can't go back to how we used to be because we can." He smiled. "I know we can. You said it yourself, we are soulmates, inevitable. We are destined to be together. No one knows me like you do and no one knows you like I do."

I shook my head.

"I'm the only one that knows you Kora, that truly knows you." He reached for my hands. "I'm the only one that understands you."

"You're wrong."

"You've loved me for half your life, I've loved you for half of mine, what else can beat that? Jeremiah?"

I frowned.

"How well do you know that dude? How well does he know you? You guys just met. There's no way he can possibly care about you like I do, love you like I do. Kora he's dangerous. Ever since you started to hang out with him, all he has caused you is trouble. What do you think is going to happen? He's never going to leave his fiancé for you. I'm the only one-" he paused. "I'm the only one that can truly love you."

"You're wrong." I had to remind him. I watched him exhale. It was obvious he was quite frustrated. I exhaled and then pulled my hands from his so I could hold his. "That's not how it works." I looked into his eyes.

"You don't know anything about us, about Jeremiah and me, you have no idea what we've been through. You don't know what he's like and you don't know what I feel for him."

"I know you don't love him." He told me. "I mean how could you possibly love him after all that he did to you?"

I raised my brow. Look who was talking. He knew exactly why I did. He exhaled.

"Look Kora, I know I messed up." I exhaled. He still didn't get it. He pulled my hands closer to him. "Kora I know I messed up really badly and I'm sorry. All I'm asking for is one more chance to do better. One more chance and I swear, you're not going to regret it."

"Luke-"

"I even broke up with Racheal for you. I could even lose your family's support. I mean, I don't care if I do at this point, all I want, all I truly want is to be with you, to really be with you. I've realized my mistakes and now I know, now I know how important you are to me. I can't live without you Kora, you're everything good to me, everything good about myself." I tried to pull my hands away gently. He grabbed on tightly to it. "Kora please. Just," he shut his eyes,

"Just let me make it up to you." He opened them again. "Let's just go back to how it used to be. You still love me, I know it, I can feel it. You loved me before and you can love me again."

"I can't."

"You can love me again."

"I can't!" I pulled my hands away from his immediately. I inhaled sharply. There were people stealing glances at us as they went on their way. I could see how Luke was staring at me. He was really surprised. I exhaled. Why was he making it so difficult?

"Kora?"

"I'm in love with someone else." I snapped at him, trying not to be so loud. "I love someone else Luke,"

I could see how he swallowed hard right after I said those words.

"I didn't know what it was before," I saw the need to continue. "I wasn't sure what it was before but he was there. He was there when everyone else wasn't. He was always there right before any of this, right before NAUN. He thought me how to heal and made me addicted to him."

I had no idea when I let out a really short chuckle.

"I get jealous when I see him with someone else and mad when he's not looking at me, I get worried when I can't reach him on his phone or when he doesn't text me back, I get sad on days like this when he's nowhere to be seen, I'm addicted to wanting him around me, my heart flutters when he looks and smiles at me and breaks into pieces when he gets hurt and pretends like he's okay. I've never felt like this before, not even when I was with you."

Just talking about it was overwhelming and I was less concerned with how what I said was affecting him.

"He makes me better. For the first time in a long time, I'm sure of what I want, for the first time someone other than my Mum actually put himself out for me, before me, someone that isn't you. I never thought that was possible but it is. I am happy. I'm truly happy Luke and if you really love me like you say you do, then you should be happy for me too. You should let me go." I slowly placed my hand on his face. "Please," I rubbed his cheek. "Let me go."

I could see the tears in his eyes and then they fell immediately. Luke sniffed and cleaned them off quickly. He needed a break.

"What's wrong with me?" He sniffed again and forced a smile on his face. He slowly reached for my hand and pulled it off his face. He squeezed it.

"I guess I'm getting dumped right now."

I felt really sad too. I wished there was a way to make him feel better but I couldn't think of anything.

"I'm sorry." I whispered to him.

"No." He sniffed and the cleaned his eyes again. "It's nothing I didn't do to you before. I deserve it. As a matter of fact, you are much nicer than I was."

"Luke,"

"Come on." He smiled even though I knew he didn't mean to. I knew Luke too much to believe that he was okay. His smile widened. "It's okay really. I'm fine." I exhaled. "He makes you happy doesn't he?"

In as much as I didn't want to give Luke another reason to be sad, I couldn't lie to him either. I nodded.

"That's all I need to know. That's all that matters to me. Your happiness. I'm fine with it."

"Luke,"

"Kora, we can still be friends right?" He asked me. "We don't have to not talk to each other anymore. We can still be best of friends just like before can't we?"

I sniffed. I was almost going to cry too but his words comforted me a lot. I nodded.

"I'm fine with it." He said. "Trust me, I'm fine."
He slowly let go of my hand. I watched him look away and then sniff right before he turned back to me.

"I guess that's settled then, I've got to attend to this thing I forgot I was supposed to attend to." Now he was just too embarrassed to talk to me and I could see it. He needed a break, he needed space. I didn't know what to say, I couldn't stop him either. "I'd see you around?" He asked me, slowly letting go of my hand.

"Yeah." I pursed my lip. I watched him turn around and started to walk away as fast as he could. I felt so guilty, so responsible for breaking his heart and I didn't even know why.

Churn!

That was my phone. I exhaled and then reached for it reluctantly from my bag. I exhaled as I pushed my gaze to the screen to see who had texted.

"Meet me at the library in five minutes."

I swallowed hard, looking at the name that popped up to see if I was seeing correctly. It was him.
It was Jeremiah.

I turned around quickly and began to walk as fast as I could down the hallway, towards the library and before I knew it, I had started to run. To run to him and it wasn't even five minutes yet.