This is a 4 times (i'm lazy) Dylan heard Lofty sing and one time Lofty heard Dylan. THIS IS SO LONG, IT WAS 6 PAGES ON WORD! I will write the songs i have used at the end of this one shot. I hope you enjoy :)

Word count: 2674

I couldn't go in cubicle 4, I just couldn't.

"Can you deal with this, Robyn." I urged and relief flooded my body when she nodded. I needed to go to the staffroom, go to safety. Everyone was busy and didn't notice me slip round Connie or Zoe. I could see the staff room and I could feel myself relaxing knowing that peace wasn't far away. I peeked through the window and couldn't see anyone but I could hear a muffled noise. I gently opened the door and creeped in, not making a sound. I recognised the familiar mop of curly mahogany hair and something deep inside of me stopped dead. The guitar strum was relaxing and sucking all the stress out of me.

"This is the first day of my life. Swear I was born right in the doorway. Went out in the rain, suddenly everything changed; they're spreading blankets on the beach."

His voice was soft yet it held a deep emotion that only someone who had been through so much could muster. A soft tingle tickled my bones and I crept over to the lockers – still out of sight – and continued to listen, transfixed.

"Yours is the first face that I saw. I think I was blind before I met you. Now I don't know where I am, don't know I've been but I know where I want to go."

Loft- Ben's life was dripping out into the words and I was glad when the voice of an angel continued to embrace my ears. I found that I was edging forward after every verse. I could now see his fingers changing chords with such finesse that I didn't think possible for the clumsiest man in Holby ED.

"And so I thought I'd let you know, that these things take forever: I am especially slow. But I realised that I need you, and I wondered if you could come home."

I wonder if he was singing about anyone. A sudden surge of jealousy shot through me... like I was hoping he wasn't. I shook away the feeling and continued to listen.

"Remember the time you drove all night? Just to meet me in the morning .And I thought it was change; you said everything had changed. You felt like you had just woke up and you said 'this is the first day of my life, I'm glad I didn't die before I met you. But now I don't care, I could go anywhere with you and be happy.'

I detected a certain bitterness at the last line and his secrets were becoming more and more intriguing.

"So if you want to be with me, with these things there's no telling. We just have to wait and see. But I'd rather be working for a paycheck than waiting to win the lottery. Besides, maybe this time it's different. I mean, I really think you like me."

"If only he did." Mumbled Ben. I was sad to realise the song had ended. I panicked and pretended I'd just walked through the door. Ben turned round and I had obviously made him jump as he had dropped his guitar on his foot.

"Careful." I mumbled in my deadpan expression but I really wanted to tell him how good he was.

"Oh- Dylan- thanks, right... yeah... I will." Gabbled Ben and he placed the guitar on the seat and walked out the staffroom.

"Strange boy." I muttered, smiling to myself.

II.

"He can go." I said

"What?" replied Ben aghast, shocked from my demand.

"Leave I don't want you here." I said again. I tried to forget about the hurt in his eyes. I didn't want him here. Maybe I was harsh? Of course I wasn't! At least, I don't think I was.

"Dylan." Motioned Rita

"Yes, of course."

I walked to collect my stuff from my locker, luckily the room was empty to my relief. I noticed a half open laptop resting on the coffee table. Curiosity got the better of me and I walked over and opened the lid. It was paused at the beginning and it was Lofty- no Ben- on screen behind a keyboard. How many more instruments could this kid play? I read the description and it shocked me when it said

"This is for the man that I love but keeps wearing me down." Surely he wasn't talking about me!

His fingers glided against the keys effortlessly and I found myself once again, amazed.

"I heard there was a secret chord that David played when he pleased the Lord but you don't really care for music, do you? It goes like this, the fourth the fifth, the minor fall, the major lift. The baffled king composing Hallelujah. Hallelujah, Hallelujah. Hallelujah, Hallelujah."

Every word drove a spike of guilt into me. He was singing about me, the angst in his words was evident.

"Your faith was strong but you needed proof, I saw him bathing on the roof. His beauty and the moonlight overthrew you. He tied you to the kitchen chair. He broke your throne and he cut your hair and from your lips he drew the hallelujah. Hallelujah, Hallelujah. Hallelujah, Hallelujah."

I was aware of the song, it's one I turn to when the world seems to have lost all It's light. I was also aware that he'd changed the lyrics. Only minutely but it made so much more of a difference. My words must have really hurt him.

"Maybe I have been here before; I know this room, I've walked this floor. I use to live alone before I knew you. I've seen your flag on the marble arch, but love is not a victory march. It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah. Hallelujah, Hallelujah. Hallelujah, Hallelujah."

Ben seemed to speak the last few words, he never looked up at the camera. He just stayed staring at the strings and the floor and I felt guilty for all of it. I didn't ever think someone could make me feel this cocktail of emotions.

"There was a time you'd let me know what's real and what's going on below. But now you never show it to me, do you? And remember when I moved in you, the holy dark was moving too. And every breath we drew was hallelujah. Hallelujah, Hallelujah. Hallelujah, Hallelujah."

I wasn't sure if I could take much more of this. Not because it was bad or boring me; it was because it was making me feel worse and worse. After every word he sang, every line he would canary would drive a stake of guilt into me.

"Maybe there's a God above. And all I ever learned from love was how to shoot at someone who outdrew you. And it's not a cry you can hear at night, it's not somebody who has seen the light. It's a cold and broken hallelujah. Hallelujah, Hallelujah. Hallelujah, Hallelujah. Hallelujah, Hallelujah."

III.

Ben had seemed to put what I said behind him and we carried on working together. I was trying to be more patient with him and less cold and I think maybe it was working. On this shift I found out Lofty's love for a certain musical. The patient we were treating was a young girl who had been pushed over in a crowd. Luckily she only had a few minor cuts but they needed to be cleaned. Her boyfriend was standing in the corner.

"Marius, wake up! What's wrong today? It looks like you've seen a ghost." Chided the girl – Marie. Lofty and I locked eyes and I mouthed "don't." He grinned cheekily at me

"Some wine and say what's going on," he belted then turning when it was Marius' part, "a ghost you say, a ghost maybe. She was just like a ghost to me. One minute there then she was gone."

"Lofty..." I urged for him to stop singing but he was in too deep

"I am agog, I am aghast. Is Marius in love at last? I've never heard him ohhh and aahh." Lofty wiggled his eyebrows at me and I couldn't help but stifle a laugh.

"You talk of battles to be won and here he comes like Don Juan. It is better than an o-pera." Sang Lofty, extenuating the o in opera.

"I think that's enough now." I motioned and prayed that he would listen to me.

"But I didn't get to my favourite verse." Wailed Lofty

"Skip to that part then if you must." I sighed

"Marius you are no longer a child, I do not doubt you mean it well but now there is a higher call. Who cares about your lonely soul? We strive towards a larger goal. Our little lives don't count at all." Finished Lofty with a little flourish at the end.

"Thank you." I finished. I had to admit, his performance was west end worthy. Of course I didn't let Lofty that.

Little did I know that was just the beginning. The other staff had witnessed Lofty in full Les Mis mode.

Example 1:

"You really are one to doll out the charm," said Rita carelessly to Nurse Jacob. Why did Lofty have to be walking past?

"Ready with a handshake and an open palm. Tells a saucy tale, cause a little stir. Customers appreciate the bonviveu.

"Lofty! For goodness sake." Scowled Rita

"Sorry." Mumbled Lofty but I saw the small smile on his face. I did feel a small smile slip onto my face and a gentle heat glowing on my cheeks.

Example 2:

Cal and Ethan were once again feuding over their shared apartment and whose responsibility it was to do the shopping

"I just feel like I'm on my own with the responsibilities." Moaned Ethan and Cal rolled his eyes. From the desk I could hear Lofty putting in an emotional performance to the lines

"Pretending he's beside me. All alone I walk with him till morning. Without him, I feel his around me. And when I lose my way I close my eyes and he has found me."

I chuckled at the dramatic sigh Lofty added once he'd finished his line

"Lofty, your singing is not helping." Snapped Cal harshly. I watched as the nurses face fell. I didn't realise how much music meant to him.

Example 3:

I was in the staffroom with Robyn and Lofty. Robyn was staring dreamily at a photo of Eddie Redmayne before she had to return to her shift.

"My heart is full of love for that man." She sighs dreamily and walks out the staffroom leaving me and Lofty alone.

"A heart full of love, a heart full of you." Sang Lofty cautiously. As if its meaning was more complex, a meaning I was supposed to understand.

"A single look and then I knew from today. For it isn't a dream, not a dream after all." I didn't realise how close we were standing until he finished his last line and we looked each other in the eyes. A strong connection holding us together.

"Will you be my Marius?" I asked shyly. Our lips touched in a pure moment of intimacy. The feel of his lips and hand that was placed delicately on my waist made me crumble with joy. Gently we both pulled away looking flushed but ridiculously happy.

"One thing." Says Lofty

"Anything." I smile

"Does this make you the woman in the relationship?" asks Lofty. I stare at him with my trademark look but we break into fits of laughter.

IV

Lofty and I had been together for a couple of months and the relationship was getting stronger and stronger. We'd never had a major argument, of course we'd have the occasional tiff, but it was usually about something minute. However this was a different argument; bad insults had been exchanged that weren't really meant. I had stormed off leaving Lofty alone and I felt awful as soon as I had turned round. I was currently lying on my bed snuggled up to Dervla. At least I knew one person still loves me as I wouldn't blame Lofty if he just broke everything off.

"I don't know you, but I want you. All the more for that. Words fall through me and always fool me. And I can't react and games they never amount to more than they're meant, they will pay themselves out." I knew that voice all too well. It was his: Lofty. I sat up and Dervla followed

"Come on, Dylan, I know you're in there." Pleaded Lofty. I stood from the bed and went to the window. I could make out Lofty's outline and his trusty guitar.

"Take this sinking boat and point it home, we've still got time. Raise your hopeful voice, we still have a choice, you'll make it now."

Was that Lofty saying that if I don't emerge now it could be over? I couldn't risk that from happening. Cautiously I opened the boat door – not fully- just so Lofty could know I was interested.

"Falling slowly, eyes that knew me and I can't go back. Moods that take me and erase me and I'm painted black. You have suffered enough and warred with yourself. It is time that you won."

This was his apology and I was going to take it. I opened the door fully and there was a smile on Lofty's face as he saw me emerge.

"Take this sinking boat and point it home, we've still got time. Raise your hopeful voice, you have a choice, you've made it now. Falling slowly, sing your melody, I'll sing along." Lofty finished

"Am I forgiven?" he asks

"Of course." I smile and kiss his forehead affectionately.

V

I was lying with Dylan on his bed, snuggled under his arm with his head resting on mine. We'd both been on the late night shift so we had finished at the same time. I went back to his house boat and we shared a very late night snack. It was actually quite romantic. Of course we finished with a little bit of making out but we both didn't want to go any further so we just kept to the kissing and snuggling. I had shut my eyes because I loved listening to Dylan's heartbeat but I think he had thought that I'd fallen asleep.

"I had a dream the other night, about how we only get on life. Woke me up right are two and stayed awake and stared at you so I wouldn't lose my mind." Dylan sang

I'd never really heard Dylan sing properly before. It was warm and homely and totally untouched. There was a rough, raw, edge that I was already falling in love with.

"And I had the week that came from hell and yes I know that you could tell. But you're like the net under the ledge; when I go flying off the edge you go flying off as well." Continued Dylan.

I kept my eyes shut because I knew that Dylan would probably stop singing if he knew I was listening like I was.

"And if you only die once, I wanna die with you. You got something I need, in this world full of people there's one killing me. And if we only die once I want to die with you. Last night I think I drank too much. Call it our temporary crutch. With broken words I've tried to day: 'honey don't you be afraid, if we've got nothing, we've got us." Hummed Dylan

I loved this song and I didn't realise how the words were so closely tailored for me and Dylan

" I know that we're not the same but I'm so damn glad that we made it to this time, this time, now. You got something I need, yeah in this world full of people, there's one killing me. And if we only die once I wanna die with you."

I knew Dylan and I were complete opposites but that was what made our relationship so special: because we were so different.

"If we only die once, I wanna die with you." Murmured Dylan. I opened my eyes and leant my forehead on his.

"If we only live once, I wanna live with you." I sang and pressed a kiss on Dylan's forehead. We stayed in each other's embrace until morning. 

SONGS USED

First day of my life - Br ight Eyes

Hallelujah - Rufus Wainwright

ABC Cafe/ Red and Black, Master of the House, On My Own and In My Life/A Heart Full Of Love - Les Misérables

Falling Slowly - Glen Hansard

Something I Need - One Republic

(I just laughed at my own joke of Something Lee Mead)