Warning: Double update.

I cranked out this chapter while my brother and dad were arguing/crying downstairs, oh...

Natsu's POV

In the car ride home, I was completely silent.

"Thanks for supporting the movement, Chelia, darling!" My mother said with a closed-mouth smile as Chelia unbuckled her seatbelt. She and Wendy shared a short, fakely-platonic side-hug before Chelia shimmied awkwardly out of the side of the car, standing in her driveway.

"No problem, Grandine-san! Today was oodles of fun, I'm glad I came! Thanks for the ride! See you at school on Monday, Wendy!" Chelia tugged at her satchel nervously as she shot an undetected look at Wendy. Wendy stared back, forgetting everything for a moment before snapping out of her hazy reverie and waving again shyly.

The window was rolled up, the tinted glass hiding Chelia's face as she padded across her driveway and up the steps. We remained in the driveway, Mom confirming Chelia got into the house safely before waving at her mother and speeding out of the drive.

We drove home with occasional small-talk radiating through the car. Mom and Dad were discussing the successes of the event, telling us they raised almost $1500 today from donations.

I wasn't sure if that was an impressive number or not, but Mom explained it was a lot more than last year, because this year was a more massive turnout, and the funds would be placed to good use for the environment protection.

My head fell against the side of the car and my eyes began to close. It was only around 8:30, but today was so long that every bone and muscle inside of me begged for rest and recovery. Don't worry, bed, I told myself. I'll be there soon.

My eyes lazily travelled down to my hand. My hand, which had gone from an innocent, unnoticeable pinkie touch to his hand softly resitng on top of mine within the star-gazing event, was still shaking slightly. Heat flooded throughout my body as the memory kept replaying inside of my head.

God, it just wouldn't leave. It was so incessantly nagging, like my mind wanted to torture me with this possibility of me and Gray like that. I had nothing against boy and boy, hell, my best friend was crazy for his drama partner, but me? It simply wasn't going to happen. I was going to live a normal life- get into a normal college, acquire a normal job, marry a normal girl, settle down in a normal house, and have two normal kids. That was the way it was supposed to be, and that's always what I expected of myself.

It seemed like everything was changing way too fast, and it was spinning me around and taunting me, and I didn't like it, not one bit.

"Natsu, everything alright? You're awfully quiet," Dad eyed me through the rear-view mirror.

"Igneel, he's probably just exhausted. He's been going full-speed for twelve hours straight," Mom explained to him, not allowing me to speak for myself.

Straight. I cringed at the word. It was like I was compelled to hearing it, like it stood out more than it should have. You're straight, Natsu, I told myself repeatedly.

We pulled into the driveway of our own home, and I yawned as I quietly got out of the car with the rest of the family. We all seemed to wordlessly kick off our shoes into the linen closet and head into our own bedrooms, pooped from the crazy day and ready to recharge. I padded up the stairs, dragged my feet down the hallway, and locked myself in the bathroom.

I stared at my reflection. My lips were chapped and my hair was mussed up in the back from lying down on the quilt just minutes before. I crossed my arms and glared at myself, mouthing words at my symmetrical reflection. You're not gay. You are not gay. No. NO. You. Are. Not. Gay. Stop thinking about this, you're making yourself worse. You're being crazy and irrational, don't you get it? Your mind won't shut up because you don't want it to shut up, and now you're getting upset. See? Quit worrying, everything's going to be okay! Nothing happened, plenty of friends do that sort of thing, ...

You get the idea.

I took out my contact lenses and snapped them in their tiny container, quickly scrubbed my teeth clean, and splashed hot water on my face (because cold water is a bitch and it is never a good idea to willingly push freezing cold liquid on your skin). Rubbing my eyes, I flicked the light off and stumbled into bed.

I didn't bother reading or texting on the group chat, which was currently blowing up with excited words of how fun today was. I simply switched it to 'do not disturb' and plugged it in the charger, turning my head away from the screen and staring at the darkened walls.

The words kept haunting me in my head. Everything was crashing down on me at once and I was suffocating. Squeezing my eyes shut in a failed attempt to block out everything, I planted my face in my pillow, hiding away from my problems.

I couldn't find the words to explain, and I was going insane. I was weak in the knees, falling head over heels, and every other cheesy cliché that I could think of. After realzing I couldn't breathe whilist smushed in the pillowcase, I flopped on my side and pulled my legs into my torso, wrapping my arms around me to contain them.

It was just so achingly wonderful, the feeling of his touch. Oh so wrong, but I craved it so, so much.

Ha, well at least stargazing, prank pulling, and spending an entire day outside are crossed of the drunk list, I thought wearily as my eyes shut. I tossed and turned, not comfortable in the slightest. Nothing was making sense anymore, and I couldn't escape.

-

Needless to say, waking up for school the next morning was a pain.

In fact, one could say when they get about four hours of sleep the night previous, it was an exceptionally large pain.

My crusted eyes would barely function and open as I rummaged around for my phone to switch off the honking alarm. Yes, my past self decided repetitive car horn honks would most certianly get me out of bed in the morning. Mission accomplished, dear me.

"Natsu! Wake up!" Mom screamed from downstairs. "It's time for school!"

"Yes, Mom, my alarm made that point very clear, thank you," I screeched back, sitting up. I unplugged my phone and scrolled through it for a moment as I relished in the last moments of staying under the covers. My Messages icon bubble had a red circle with the number 178 in it, and I immediately knew the squad had been blowing up my phone all night.

In our group chat, which somehow along the way, Lucy had dubbed it 'better family', they were all telling funny stories before discussing random things that really didn't matter at almost 12 in the morning. I typed a hasty reply in place of a good-morning text.

Natsu: You bitches better be glad I have unlimited texting.

Bumblebee 🐝: Morning, sleeping beauty.

Natsu: Shut up.

Bumblebee: 🐝 :D

I scrolled as high up as I had the endurance to, and when I got lazy, I just read from the middle of the conversation. They were arguing over the importance of Starbucks coffee that somehow morphed into cats ruling the world, and just like Gajeel, who was basically saying 'oh my god shut up' every text, I had to agree with him for once.

I closed my phone and peeled the covers off of me. Even if I was pretty tired, I was in a relatively good mood, until everything from yesterday came flooding back into my mind. I literally staggered, pressing my head against the doorframe to the bathroom in surprise to catch my balance.

"What's wrong?" Wendy asked with a snappy, morning-teenager tone as she walked by.

"Nothing," I snapped.

"Fine, I didn't care anyways," She hissed back, flipping her fishtail braid over one shoulder and stomping down the stairs. I felt momentarily guilty and made a mental note to remember to apologize later.

I got ready for school quickly, dressing and doing all the morning necessities before eating a granola bar and downing some strong coffee for a quick breakfast. I felt like I was rushing myself through the day, which in all honesty, I was, because I already wanted it to be over.

"Woah, woah! Natsu, slow down!" Mom said from the kitchen table with awe as I chugged the rest of my coffee mug. I made that gasping sound after removing your mouth from a really good drink and wiped my top lip.

"Got to get to school early," I lied. "Big test first period. Love you, see ya."

She blew me a kiss that I pretended to catch and store in my pocket. I slung my backpack over my shoulders, pushed my earbuds in, and decided to walk to school, figuring it would do me good. Since it was a warm day and I was already early, there was no harm in the idea.

I kicked a stone on the pavement, the memories of yesterday still in my mind. I realized I had forgotten to pack a lunch, but it wasn't that big of a dissapointment, considering I knew I wouldn't be up for eating anyways.

Sigh. My relapse was just another thing to my annoyingly-long list of reasons why life currently sucked for this upper-middle-class teenage boy. Sarcastically speaking, because I knew I should be grateful, considering life sucked even worse in plenty of parts in the world, but I was still allowed to have problems too, right?

I got to school a couple minutes early, about to take the stairs up into the main building, when I felt a hand roughly drag me through the courtyard and back to the parking lot. Surprised and scared, I looked up with fright in my eyes to find out it was only Gray.

I felt all worry ease away from me and build up twice as much at the same time, if that even made any sense. Did that made sense? No? Good.

"Gray, slow down-! Where the hell are we doing?" I shouted at him.

Gray stopped in front of his car, whirling around to face me with a huge beam on his face. "Something spontaneous, obviously," He grinned, ushering to the passenger door. "Now get in."

- - - -

This goes out to OnlySwimFree !! You're the best person on this planet and I wish you an amazingly awesome happy birthday! I wish I could hug you irl but you'll just have to deal with angst lmao :o) Best wishes to you, have a lovely 14! xx