𝓔𝓵𝓪𝓮𝓷𝓪 𝓣𝓪𝓻𝓰𝓪𝓻𝔂𝓮𝓷
Alicent was found within the hour of her escape. She hadn't made it very far making it easy for the guards to find her only a floor below her chambers searching for something.

Once Aemond explained everything he'd found the small council chambers had never been so silent.

Our false peace had come to a close it was quite clear now.

Helaena had been pushed from that window of Maegors Holdfast and it was safe to assume that Aegon had something to do with it.

It was nearly morning but Aemond insisted on questioning more servants himself, hoping he could see a hidden detail that the knights themselves hadn't noticed.

After checking on the children I wrack my mind with how on earth we're to break the news to poor Jaehaera.

How was a twelve-year-old expected to deal with all this loss?

How were any of us?

Resigned to the sleepless night it's when the sun begins to rise behind the morning clouds that I wander to Helaena's rooms as I usually did when sleep evaded me.

Slowly turning the knob I expect an empty room but I'm taken aback by Aemond's tall frame blocking out the early morning sunlight from the larger window.

"These chambers are off limits-" he spits, stopping himself when our eyes connect from across the dark room.

Though I can't make out much of his expression I notice his hardened stare softens but only slightly.

Even the smell of her perfume lingered as if she'd just put it on before our feast.

"I'm sorry... I didn't expect you to be here," I confess, waiting for a reply that never comes.

Unsure of what to do I spin on my heels, heading for the door, "I'll just give you some time-"

"No,"

I freeze, turning around slowly to look at him petrified of doing or saying the wrong thing.

We'd lost so many. Nothing could be said that would comfort him or me in the slightest, for we both knew of the inevitable.

Aegon would return and it mattered not who he struck down in his path to get his revenge.

Closing the door behind me I close the distance between us but Aemond's gaze remains locked on something out the window below.

The morning light shined on his chiseled face and his eye was a deep dark shade of pink as if he'd been crying to himself for hours.

Knowing nothing I can say will fix it I take my husband's hand, looping my arm through his but he's stone cold.

"I never imagined I'd be raising my sibling's children... I was meant to protect her and I got comfortable for all of a moment."

"We can't live in fear, Aemond. Helaena never would've wanted that-"

"But we'll never know now will we?"

"I think we do know. You said yourself she'd been acting strange all week, reserved unless she was insisting on you seeing your mother."

For once Aemond kept his mouth shut, no witty response because he knew I spoke the truth.

"If Helaena didn't jump, do you think she knew she would be pushed?" I propose softly.

For a few long moments, he mulls it over, his gaze lifting to Dreamfyre who flew circles around the city, crying out in mourning for her rider.

"If she knew I don't know that I'll be able to forgive her for leaving us so willingly,"

Aemond's first reaction is anger in an attempt to guard himself from the pain but it only prolonged the inevitable.

The burning in the back of my throat persists and I don't bother holding the tears at bay. I would show my husband that he wasn't alone in his hurt, he was never alone.

"She never would've left Jaehaera willingly you know that-"

"Then why didn't she tell me, Elaena?! She didn't leave a note, she didn't even give me a chance to decode one of her damned riddles she just DIED!"

Aemond yanks himself away from me to pace Helaena's rooms and I cringe at his unusual roughness with me.

Seeing something that only makes it worse Aemond drives his foot into a small chest of old toys with a roar of rage sending the wooden bits flying across the room.

I recoil against the window, bracing for more damage when my husband freezes, cocking his head to the side.

Most of the toys are miscellaneous dolls and animals but what Aemond reaches for is an old wooden dragon. It had seen better days, missing a corner of his wing but it was finely made specifically for a young Prince or princess.

Aemond falls to his knees, dropping Dark Sister to clatter onto the floor beside him and I have to clasp my hand over my mouth to muffle the sob that works its way up my throat.

I'd never seen my husband so broken, not in the entirety of our lives that I'd known and loved him.

"I wasn't enough for her... how am I expected to be enough for them?" He rasps through tears and I take a timid step forward, knowing in my heart of hearts who he refers to, our children.

"You're more than enough, Aemond. Perhaps it couldn't have been avoided-"

"It could've been! ALL OF THIS COULD'VE BEEN AVOIDED!" He shouts through tears.

I didn't think I had tears left to cry but sure enough gallons more stream hot trails down my face.

He doesn't have to say it outright but I know what he must mean.

Aemond regrets what he says instantly but it doesn't dull the sharp pain that twists in my chest at his hurtful words.

"Avoided by not... choosing me, you mean?" My voice is broken, a squeak through the very same lips he'd ravaged only twenty-four hours prior.

"Of-of course not. Elaena,-" Though he'd hesitated only a half of a moment, it was plenty long enough to send another arrow through my heart

"I'm afraid it's much too late to change things now," I whisper, offering him a sad smile.

Deciding against staying I take a deep breath to compose myself as I walk by him.

My husband either doesn't know what to say or realizes nothing he can say now will take away the sting, so he stays silent hanging his head in shame.

"We must decide how we'll tell the children. If you'd like me to speak with them I can-"

"No. We'll speak to them together." Aemond must work up the nerve to look at me but when he does I almost wish he hadn't.

"What will we say?"

Aemond glances back down to the toy dragon in his hands, turning it over delicately as he replies, "We tell them the truth,"

"Which is what exactly?"

"That she was killed by our brother, her husband."

***

The next week in Kings Landing is plagued with heartache and mourning. Even the gods above wept for the princess who'd been lost too soon and still, we had no one to blame or clues on where to go from here.

The storms only made things worse, keeping Luke, Corlys, and Rhaena away until it was safe to travel home.

Baela had taken matters into her own hands when she noticed Aemond's absence from everyday activities writing them to come home and it was any day now that we were expecting them.

As one could expect my husband had taken Helaena's death the worst along with her daughter but my mother was a close third.

The whispers from the court and common folk were dirt in the wound only furthering my mother's gnawing guilt.

Many wondered if she had something to with it just as she had Ser Laenor but none of them knew the truth of my mother's heart. After all, some still speculated her hand in blood and cheese even if she'd been vocal in her opposition.

The children on the other hand had remained thick as thieves, never leaving Jaehaera to be sad on her own.

"You can cry, Jaehaera. My father says it doesn't make you any less strong," Visaera had told her, taking it upon herself to hold her cousin's hand through the entire funeral procession, not once letting her out of her sight as I had with Aemond.

We hadn't spoken much since our argument, only when necessary and I missed him desperately even as he stood mere inches to my left.

Lifelessly he stared at his sister's pyre as Dreamfyre lit it ablaze and there was absolutely nothing I could do.

I was helpless once more but I had four children to raise, there was no time for me to falter when everyone around me craved stability. Aemond had always been my unwavering support and now was my time to be there for him.

This afternoon, a day after Helaena's funeral, I'd left Aemond to his work in the small council chambers, giving him space I try to avoid being a smothering presence though it goes against every instinct in my body to leave his side.

Today the sun had granted us lovely weather finally bringing a break to the thunderstorms. Thankfully Baela and Joffrey had agreed that we shouldn't pass up the opportunity to take the children riding, using the opportunity to lift whatever spirits we all had left.

Pulling my daughter closer to my chest she squeals in excitement and the wind flows through our long white blonde Valyrian hair, carrying all our worries through the sky.

Even Seasmoke is relieved to be flying again, the confines of the dragon pit a damper on all of our dragon's growth.

To our left Joffrey and Tyraxes are trying to inch in front of us, a loud-mouthed Jaehaeryn hanging onto him from behind.

"They can't beat us, Momma! Seasmoke! Adere!"
*faster

Visaera calls out, her joy is infectious and though she's not his rider Seasmoke happily obliges her command.

My fearsome dragon stretches his silver wings with a roar that sends ripples down the seam of the ocean and a prideful grin stretches across my face.

At first, we might've given the boys a head start but when it comes to the finish line the red beast reminiscent of my father's dragon, Caraxes, doesn't stand a chance against my own grown dragon.

Like lightning that cracked through the sky not days prior we soar past them to victory and for a moment with the sun on my skin and my daughter's gleeful laughter, one could almost forget all the tragedy we've had to endure. I only wished Aemond was here, flying with us side by side.

With Visaera riding along, Seasmoke is gentle with our landing, walking straight up to Aelyx and Jaehaera who stood with Baela and Cregan, watching from below.

"We won! Jae will never, ever beat us!" Visaera laughs over her shoulder, her bright smile reminding me more of myself when I was her age.

"That's right little one. You will both ride dragons of your own one day. The gods will bring you one when you're ready just as they had for your father and me." I assure her, tucking her stray hair behind her ears.

"My dragon will be the fiercest!"

"But mine will be the fastest!" Jaehaeryn and Joffrey are already dismounting beside us and the adorable rivalry between the two of them rages on.

"You've got to find one first cousin!"

Deflating Jae's ego Aelyx laughs at him from below but my little girl is already occupied elsewhere, taking it upon herself to unlatch her straps to climb down.

"Visaera! Be careful, silly girl!" Baela calls out to my daughter but she doesn't listen, jumping down to run after an unexpecting Tyraxes still squeamish with his young age.

Baela attempts to sweep her up in her arms but she's not quick enough and Visaera startles the young dragon. Tyraxes blows out a small burst of a flame above her head but she stumbles backward into the sand, shielding her face from the fire.

Seasmoke must sense my panic roaring in defense of my daughter, ever the protective dragon.

My heart lurches from my chest up into my throat at the cries of my children and I throw myself from Seasmoke, my heels driving into the sand from the height I've jumped.

My knees almost give way but I push myself forward, running after my daughter.

The dragon keepers make quick work of calming the young dragon, veering him away from the children.

By the time I reach her Baela is hoisting her up into her arms to bring her to me.

"Mama! It hurts! He hurt my arm, Mama!" Visaera cries as my sister hands her to me. The both of us examine her wound, thanking our lucky stars that it wasn't too bad but we both know there's no treating it here.

"You scared him, Vis! He didn't do it on purpose, it's your fault!" Aelyx shouts, defending his trusted dragon but Jaehaeryn stomps forward, "It was an accident! Leave, her, alone!"

Jahaerha steps between the boys pushing them back from one another, "Stop fighting!"

"Get her inside, I'll take the rest of them," Joffrey offered his help and I could cry, my little brother was not so little anymore even if he was the youngest brother I had left.

The boys continue to fight even as their uncle takes them their separate way up to the castle and Baela and I can't help but chuckle at the true brotherhood they'd built.

"Mama, it burns," Visaera cries, nuzzling her nose into my neck.

"It's not so bad a burn, Vis. If anything it's a badge of honor when growing up beside dragons." Baela offers, slipping her finger into my daughter's small hand and I'm so grateful to have her home with me, with us.

"Your Aunt Baela is right. All of us have been burned a time or two,"

"Even you Momma?" She asks sweetly and my heart skips a beat in my chest.

"Even me,"

Visaera is all bandaged up courtesy of the maester and thankfully the burn is minimal, something any young rider might experience when learning to fly.

Cregan's just arrived in his search for Baela when Aemond hears the news.

His thundering footsteps might've insighted fear in everyone else but my breathing stays calm, bracing myself for the argument that was sure to come.

"Where is she?!" He doesn't ask anyone in particular, finding Visaera and I through the people, drawn to one another even if his gaze was murderous.

He pushes past Cregan, and Baela rolls her eyes at my husband expectedly but Aemond's focus is one thing and it's his daughter.

Sitting beside me on the bed he examines her arm for himself but our daughter watches him as if he has two heads.

I'd just spent the past hour reassuring her it was surely not a big deal but here her father was, making a hell of a big deal about it.

"What's happened? What was she doing in the dragon pits?"

I open my mouth to reply but my daughter beats me to it, "We went flying, Father! Momma says all Dragonriders get burned-"

"You're too young! A nearly four-year-old girl has no business being unsupervised near a wild dragon!" He reprimands her, my daughter's smile falling from her little face.

"She was supervised, Aemond. It was an accident, she startled Tyraxes nothing more. A lesson hard learned but the maesters already assured us she'll be fine," I interject crossing my arms over my chest. My frustration burned in my gaze and I wondered if this was where we'd clash, over the parenting of our children.

Did he not trust me to watch over them myself?

"Perhaps we take Visaera to her chambers to rest? It's been a long day for everyone," Baela thankfully breaks the silent tension that was brewing between us and without shifting his gaze from me Aemond replies, "A wonderful idea. Thank you, Lady Baela."

His sarcastic tone makes me cringe and if our daughter hadn't been sitting mere feet away I'd smack him across the back of his pretty head.

Cregan narrows his eyes at Aemond in warning but my sweet sister ignores him for the sake of Visaera, taking her hand and leading both Cregan and her from the room as the maester and handmaidens follow.

Aemond waits for the click of the door to rise from his chair to begin pacing the room, hardly able to look at me.

"Aemond, we can't continue like thi-"

"What were you thinking!? You could've gotten our daughter killed!" He shouts.

I jump out of my seat to defend myself but he's not wrong. Having Tyraxes along with the other dragons so soon was a risk, but one I'd taken for the sake of their happiness not taking a moment to think of what could happen.

"I was thinking I could give those kids something to distract them from all the horror that surrounds us-"

"By inflicting more damage?! My sister wasn't enough tragedy for you?!"

I flinch away from his rage, not at all used to it being aimed at me. Tears flood my eyes and I look away, ashamed.

Of course, that was why he was so angry.

"Helaena was plenty enough... I'm sorry, you know that I would never put our children in danger,"

Aemond closes the distance between us but I don't flinch this time, standing firm to face him straight on. He has to cock his head down to meet my eyes and what I see in his lavender gaze makes my blood run cold.

"But you did," He whispers, his quiet disappointment heart-wrenching.

Reaching for his hand, I timidly interlock our fingers. He stiffens, but a bit of his rage dissipates whether it be his intention or not.

"I'm sorry I've disappointed you, but you and I both know being a dragon rider comes with its danger."

"Danger we should be protecting them from! How am I to trust you..." he trails off realizing much too late what he's said.

My husband might as well have driven a sword into my heart and having heard quite enough I drop his hand to walk away.

"We were only children when you claimed Vhagar, riding her through the skies as we clung on for our lives. I think it's time you came to terms with the fact that our children are just as headstrong as we were," I tell him softly, settling in the tense silence between us before I go for the door, shutting it gently behind me.

***

Smoke billows around me and these walls are familiar but ones I haven't seen in years.

Looking around for a way of escape the floor trembles with the roars of dragons above me.

I shield my eyes from the bright sunlight peeking through the cracks in the ceiling. There's rubble blocking my path as I try to stand but I trip falling headfirst into a pile of bodies.

At first, I imagine they're strangers, soldiers of some sort but once I get a better look I realize it's us.

My sweet babes are older but alas dead, crushed beneath the rubble and I fall to my knees reaching as far as I can for their hands.

Beside Aelyx and Visaera is Aemond, his sapphire missing from his skull as his lifeless violet eye stares back at me, haunting me.

Falling to my knees I see the rest of my loved ones piled beneath them, burned bruised, and bloodied.

Rhaena, Baela, Luke, Joffrey, Jaehaera, my Mother and Grandfather but where was Jaehaeryn?

With burning tears trailing down my cheeks, I call out for him in the darkness but there's no reply, only dragons crying from above me, their orange and blue flames raining from the sky like promised oblivion.

Closing my eyes I will myself to wake up from this awful nightmare.

"Please, this can't be our fate. I beg you, I beg whoever's listening, please!" I scream until my face goes red, along my way to Aemond.

"Please don't leave me, take me with you," I cry, clinging to his dead body.

As if the gods have heard my pleas more pieces of rubble fall from the ceiling, the smoke billowing around me.

I struggle for air, coughing as more pieces of the ceiling fall shaking the ground beneath me until I finally look up, just as the ceiling collapses with all of us beneath it.

I wake with a jolt, drenched in sweat and I almost can't catch my breath.

Reaching for Aemond beside me my heart drops when I realize he'd never come to bed that night.

For just a moment I succumb to my grief, screaming desperate cries into my pillow.

Why must our happiness be ever fleeting?

The emotion surging through me seeks a way to claw its way out and I can't bear it.

The images flash before me fresh once more and I reassure myself as Aemond used to do.

"It's not real, none of it's real. Our fates are our own,"

I take deep breaths, cradling the pillow to my chest and slowly the sharp pain dulls to a paranoid ache that I feared would find its home within me.

Reaching for my song book I flip through its pages.

Aemond's handwriting was so beautiful, his penmanship thoughtful, and as I graze my fingertips over the lyrics of our songs the tears return or perhaps they never stopped to begin with.

As I flip through the empty pages my eye catches a lone page with scribbles that I didn't recognize as Aemond's handwriting or my own.

Some things, no matter how terrible are sometimes unavoidable.

I have to repeat the words to myself over and over again until I remember where I'd heard them before, years prior.

Helaena.

If only she was here to see what had become of our song.

***