𝓔𝓵𝓪𝓮𝓷𝓪 𝓣𝓪𝓻𝓰𝓪𝓻𝔂𝓮𝓷
Winterfell was a dull estate in comparison to Kings Landing and its warm, crowded city. Given the circumstances it's welcoming. There was no stench or sins that plagued every dark corner or home, no, there was law there was order.

Hard-working men and women welded, cut meat, or trained in the courtyard where small bonfires sheltered any who sought warmth from the northern chill.

Cradling my belly beneath my cloaks I whisper to the growing babe inside of me, "Another adventure, little one."

As I walk up to the guards their mouths are agape, in shock at my arrival but by their reaction, I assume they know exactly who I am.

Clearing my throat their gazes snap away from my body and to my narrowed fierce eyes.

"I'm here to see my brother, Jacaerys Velaryon. He was sent as an envoy to treat with your Lord-"

"Elaena?!"

My ears perk up at the familiar voice and I find my brother in the courtyard straight away but he isn't alone.

Behind him Cregan Stark wore thick furs alike my brother, framing his shoulders even wider than what I remember and he's grown a bit of facial hair to frame his jaw.

Jace crashes to my chest and judging by the tight hold he offers me, he's already heard the news of our little brother and without much control, tears flood my tired eyes.

"It's all my fault, all of it." I cry softly into his shoulder but he shakes his head, tightening his hold.

"No. No, it's not all your fault... you were right." His broken voice shocks me. I'd been expecting rage, anger, blame all of it but my little brother didn't seem to hold any of it against me and for that, I'd be eternally grateful.

Pulling back to look at him, his warm brown eyes are downcast, avoiding my own.

"You were right, it was too dangerous. We should've sent ravens... he was too young."

I couldn't remember the last time Jace had told me I was right about anything. When I'd made my relationship with Aemond public knowledge he'd all but told me to burn in the seven hells.

My mouth goes dry and I can't find the words I'd so delicately planned on my flight here but maybe it was for the best.

"Welcome to Winterfell, princess. I'm sorry your visit isn't under better circumstances." Cregan approaches slowly, uneager to interrupt the sibling moment we shared, and the tension between us was still thick despite the months we'd spent apart.

The last time I'd seen Cregan Stark he was bleeding out in the sand after Aemond had won my hand in marriage. The memory is bittersweet, bringing back that gnawing feeling of betrayal and heartbreak.

If it was possible, my frown deepens when Cregan's eyes connected with mine.

"Thank you, Lord Stark. To be truthful I'd hoped not to visit at all." Cocking my head to the side a bit he arches an eyebrow at my witty reply.

Chuckling to himself he shrugs his shoulders.

"Nevertheless Princess, you're under the North's protection. I'll see to it you're comfortable here."

I scoff at the idea of being protected by him.

If Aemond came to finish the job Vhagar would burn us all to ash before Cregan could dress himself.

When I don't respond I only stare at him, examining his lightweight armor draped with his fur cloak, and though it had only been months the young Stark Lord had grown. Not only in height but in muscle mass and if I hadn't known better, I would've thought he'd taken the loss in the tourney quite hard.

Cregan clears his throat as he shifts his weight between his feet, growing uncomfortable under the intensity of my stare and I revel in it.

"Have the Princess shown to her quarters. If she's hungry see to it she has a hot meal brought to her rooms." The Lord of Winterfell speaks kindly to the maids and the two girls swoon a bit but he either doesn't notice or doesn't care, instead turning to look back at me and Jace.

"I'm holding an audience soon with some Northern lords, but we'll reconvene for dinner. That is... if you decide to join us, my lady." Bowing his head in respect he smiles politely and takes his leave with his men but I'm left baffled at his kindness.

"He's pledged the North to Mother. He's sending word to his bannermen." My brother explains, a bit of hope in his voice but I narrow my eyes at him in confusion.

"And what does he want in return?" I ask, skeptical.

If Cregan thought now was his second chance with me he was ridiculously mistaken.

"Nothing. His father bent the knee years ago, and for the Starks that seems to be enough." Jace gives my shoulder a squeeze but there was no reassurance when my trust was so freshly wounded.

Jace being the protective little brother he is takes after my father, escorting me along with the handmaidens to my rooms.

The drafty halls and cold stone walls remind me much of Dragonstone but still different, fresh, and exactly the change of scenery I'd needed.

As I sit on the large comfortable bed I fiddle with the rings on my fingers and an odd thought crosses my mind.

If things had been different, this would be my home.

If I'd been an obedient little daughter as my father wished I would've married Cregan, becoming lady of Winterfell.

Maybe if I had Lucerys would still be alive...

Fresh tears sting at my eyes but this time I don't let them fall. I would be stronger, I had to be.

After a hot bath, I expect to feel better but instead, I feel numb. Usually, I find joy in doing my own hair and styling my own dresses but tonight I couldn't find the energy.

Wordlessly I stare at myself in the mirror as the last remaining handmaiden fiddles with my hair, still unsure of what to do with it.

She wasn't used to the Southern styles of braids that I usually wear and I notice her scrunched-up face of frustration in the mirror. She couldn't be much younger than Jace, with long brown hair that fell in waves past her shoulders.

Her high cheekbones and her siren-like eyes surely swooned any man. Lord, royal, or otherwise would be captivated by her.

Glancing up at me in the mirror her hazel eyes meet mine and a shy blush covers her face. "M-my apologies, princess. It's not often we get visitors such as you and the young prince at Winterfell."

Feeling guilty I turn, taking her cold hands in mine, "It's not often I have another do my hair, so this is a bit new for the both of us."

I smile the best I can and her tense shoulders sink with ease.

"I can teach you some of the styles if you're interested?"

She nods excitedly and I bring the mirror higher to get a better look at the top of my head.

Weaving the different pieces of hair throughout the top of my head she watches quietly as I taught her step by step.

As a child, I'd grown used to being the only girl. I was a tomb boy at heart, more interested in sparring and my books than the sewing classes forced upon me by my mother and father when I was a girl.

But because of that, it wasn't often I made friends. I had my family and that was all I needed.

Once I show her a few braids that I frequently wear her eyes go wide with joyous wonder and she goes to work.

The silence between us feels uncomfortable but she doesn't notice keeping her focus on my hair.

"What's your name?" I ask softly and she freezes behind me for a moment.

"My name? It's Sara Snow, my lady." Timidly she finally tells me and her hesitation brings suspicion.

Who was she truly?

"How long have you been under the Stark's service?" Making conversation wasn't always my strong suit and it seemed every question I asked only put her more on edge.

"All my life, princess. The Starks have always taken good care of me... There! How does that look, my lady?"

Turning to look at myself in the mirror I examine the loose messy braids that she'd practiced on the back of my head.

Trying and failing to hide the look on my face, Sara and I burst into a fit of girlish laughter and I can't remember the last time I've laughed like this.

Through our laughter, we don't hear the knock at the door but Jacaerys lets himself in, our voices carrying out into the hall.

When he sees us together he's taken aback. Sara's smile falls from her face, her nervousness returning when she notices him.

"Sara," He breathes meant as a greeting but I see through it.

"My Prince," Sara stands from the bed flustered under the heated stare of my brother, and my gaze darts between them. The air in the room shifts and it feels similar to when Aemond would enter a room.

He was all I could see.

All I'd ever wanted.

The moment he crosses my mind the smile drops from my face and the familiar pain in my chest returns.

Though neither of them says a word I look away, suddenly feeling as though I'm intruding on a private conversation.

"I've come to speak with my sister. Could we have a moment of privacy, my lady?" He speaks to her with odd politeness in his voice and with a curt nod, Sara hangs her head brushing beside him as she takes her leave.

The moment she's gone Jacaerys closes the door behind her, taking a deep breath and the color begins to return to his face.

Glancing in my direction I arch a suspicious eyebrow at him.

"Seems you two have grown to know one another?"

"I've only been here two days, Elaena-"

"And you've forgotten about Baela rather quickly,"

I don't hide the venom in my backhanded comment. If he ruined his betrothal to Baela he'd tear apart our family from the inside out.

"I haven't! It's quite the opposite. I'd hoped Grandmother would've allowed her to come with me..." his face falls when Lucerys crosses his mind, "But it seems you both saw the danger we hadn't."

Being vulnerable for a moment I shock even myself.

"I expected you'd turn me away when I arrived. You and Father were most skeptical of... my decisions-"

"Rage was my first reaction." Jace stares off avoiding my eyes as he confesses this to me and my heart stops.

"I wanted to kill him for what he's done, seven hells I still want to kill him. I had half a mind to break my oaths as he did and find him wherever it is he's hiding and-" Stopping himself he crosses his arms over his chest. "Blame can fall wherever it may but we're still burdened with the weight of the loss... at least that's what a friend of mine told me."

Straightening my posture I don't expect the wise words that come from my little brother's mouth.

"And which friend was that?" I ask softly, wondering who it was I owed my thanks.

He chuckles to himself, glancing up at me from under his dark eyebrows.

"Cregan."

Taken aback I half expected him to say Sara.

Jacaerys expects it but he's still amused by my face, chuckling at my reaction.

Clearing my throat I stand to brush out my hair, "The Warden of the North is quite the poet."

"You could say that. It was him who sent me to ask if you'd be joining us for dinner."

"Sent you?"

"Well, you've made it quite clear how you feel about him. I wouldn't be surprised if you intimidate him."

"Intimidate him? Hmph, and he's offering us protection?" Rolling my eyes Jace holds his hands up in surrender.

"Personally sweet sister, I'd be worried if he wasn't intimidated. You're a force to be reckoned with Elaena, the heir to the Iron Throne."

Jace's kind words bring calm to the stormy seas of my heart but it makes me a bit uncomfortable. It seemed I wasn't used to compliments from anyone other than Aemond.

If only my brother knew how many times it was Aemond who'd saved me from the clutches of death.

Was it possible to hate someone and miss them so deeply at the same time?

I wanted answers, and I deserved them.

"You can tell the Warden of the North I'll be joining you for dinner, but only because I'm hungry."

Jacaerys smiles at me, my answer finally satisfying him and I find myself smiling back.

Maybe this trip wouldn't be as terrible as I'd first thought.

Deciding on something different for the evening I leave most of my wavy hair down and only braid the top, leaving wisps of my shorter hairs to frame my face.

I'm about ready when a small knock comes to the door and it's Sara who comes to escort me to dinner.

When she sees the intricate braid her mouth drops open in awe, her two small hands coming to her chest as she gasps.

"Beautiful, princess! You'll have to teach me before you leave us."

Crossing the room to meet her I take her hands in mine.

"Of course. It would be... nice to have a friend. I don't have many of those." Keeping my voice low it's thick with sincerity though I was a bit embarrassed to say but she shyly looks away.

"Whatever pleases you, my lady."

Her blunt reply is expected. If she was too friendly, or too crass it could be perceived entirely wrong and it was smart of her not to trust me right away.

On our walk to dinner, whispers follow us around every dark corridor. They stared when they thought I wasn't paying attention but I saw it all.

Was I the terrible sister who'd fed her brother to her monster of a husband? Or was I the pathetic wife of a traitor? Perhaps it was both.

"What is it that they whisper about?" I ask, nervous about her response.

Glancing away she squeezes my hand just as Aemond used to and my steps stop in the middle of the hallway.

"It's just gossip, Princess. I assure you,"

"But what is they say, Sara?"

She continues to avoid my eyes and I know it must be bad and my face falls into a deeper frown.

"They speak of... your condition."

At first, I keep calm, hopeful it's anything other than what it truly is.

"My condition?"

"Yes, my lady. There's talk about how you carry the Prince's child. If I'm honest, your relationship with the Prince has always been quite the topic of discussion."

When she mentions it I could almost vomit. The news of my pregnancy had spread North. I was a fool to think I could outrun it this long.

Taking a step closer to her I keep my voice low. "I know he's only been here a couple of days but... you're close with Jacaerys?"

As if I could make her any more flustered Sara's panicked hazel eyes search the hall for any listeners and my suspicions are all but confirmed.

She doesn't need to verbalize a response for me to read her expression, so I ask her my next question.

"Does he know?"

Biting at her lip she nods her head, "He's heard the whispers but he won't bring himself to believe them."

My poor, sweet innocent brother.

Jacaerys didn't want to believe I was pregnant with Aemond's child, he was the man who murdered our little brother but my child was innocent, just like Jaehaeryn.

Neither of my little boys deserved to be shamed before they've even thought a bad thought.

Instinctively I place my hand over my growing belly. I wouldn't be able to hide it with furs and cloaks for much longer. I was already struggling with morning sickness and certain smells.

If I wanted to keep my brother close, I'd have to be truthful. Cregan's advice wouldn't save me from my brother's rage for a second time.

Without giving away too much, we continue our walk to the dining hall.

The men on guard open the wide doors made of oak and iron to reveal the long tables that could fit hundreds of people but they were bare and dark, only drawing the eye to the raised platform where Cregan sat with the only other person at the table being Jacaerys.

Thankfully, Sara keeps hold of my hand, my strength as she keeps us moving forward.

Cregan doesn't bother hiding the distaste on his face as he looks at me and though I don't want to admit it, it bothers me.

Growing flustered beneath Cregan's stare I look to Jace whose too busy staring at Sara and all of this feels too familiar.

Unlike Kings Landing there aren't servants at every turn or a band to play soothing melodies but just a handmaiden or two to bring hot food to the table as Sara pulls out my chair for me.

"Thank you," I smile sweetly at her and she shyly returns the favor before doing a quick courtesy, and taking her leave through a side servant's door.

Jace doesn't look away from her until Cregan clears his throat, turning his narrowed eyes to my brother.

I'd barely spoken a word to Cregan since my arrival and it seemed he was already annoyed with my very presence.

They both stare at one another over the table hardly poking at their food and it feels like I've walked in on what was just an argument.

Racking my mind for something to say I ask the first thing that comes to mind.

"How was the meeting with your bannermen?"

My voice is tiny but in the silent room, it bounces off the stone walls.

Both of them turn their heads, but it's Cregan whose expression softens when his brown eyes settle on me, frowning a bit but he catches himself

"It was... eventful to say the least." His sharp jaw twitches with tension. Waiting for him to elaborate he doesn't, and I don't remember the conversation with him being this dull.

"Eventful? Were there houses that decided to back Aegon's claim?"

He shakes his head, scratching at the beard lining his chin and whatever it was that happened he's reluctant to tell me.

Taking a deep breath he glances at my brother and then back to me.

"Prince Aemond was sighted at White Harbour. A couple of men attempted to apprehend him at an Inn but he slaughtered them and stole their horses." Cregan speaks of my husband with disgust and even hearing his name brings my heart to a stop.

My grip on my silverware turns my knuckles white. I had so many questions but I couldn't manage words.

Staring at the plate of food in front of me my appetite disappears and I push it away.

"I've already sent a search party south to find him and kill him if they have to-"

"What? No, you can't," I drop my silverware and it falls, clattering against the floor.

From the other end of the table Jacaerys rolls his eyes, "I told you,"

Narrowing my irritated stare at my brother I see now what tension I've walked into, they'd been talking about me and this plan they've conjured up.

"Told him what exactly? Aemond has answers." I twist the napkin between my hands in an effort to calm myself down. Biting my tongue I keep my tone low, "Some of us want an explanation... some of us are owed that."

Jace and Cregan share another look with one another making me feel even more on the outs than I had when I arrived.

"The answers he'd give won't bring Luke back. He took advantage of all of us, Elaena. It's what he deserves!"

It's only taken all day but my brother's hatred for Aemond was finally beginning to show its face.

"You don't need to remind me of what he's done Jacaerys! There's not a single moment I haven't thought about it, reminded of my failings every moment of every day!"

"And all I want to do is make this right and bring that kinslayer to justice!"

I couldn't blame Jace for his hunger for revenge because he wasn't the only one who craved it.

Cregan keeps to himself watching the both of us argue but he doesn't say a word, only watching us over his linked fingers.

"What happened to the honorable Lord Stark, hm? I thought you tried and then executed men in the North." Challenging Cregan he quirks an eyebrow, his deep gaze twinkling with familiarity from the very night he spoke those words.

I wondered if he was questioned frequently because of his age. Did men old enough to be his grandfather accept his leadership?

Sighing to himself he realizes I'm right. "Hmph. Your sister has a point,"

"What? Just a moment ago you were going to bring my mother his head-"

"And I still plan to, but for now it stays on his shoulders."

Cregan cuts him off, raising his voice in an authoritative tone that I assume is normal for the Warden of the North, and when his voice dips into a gruff octave I shiver.

"Do you think he's coming here?" I ask, and the boys share another look with one another but it's Cregan who speaks.

"Possibly."

He watches me in anticipation that I might break before his very eyes and he uses his enclosed hands to hide the frown on his face.

"We won't let him anywhere near you, Elaena. We'll keep you safe," Jace attempts to reassure me but I know my husband better than anyone.

He could be here any minute, any hour aback Vhagar and if Aemond Targaryen wanted me, he'd take me no matter the barriers between us. He'd done it once and he'd do it again.

The very idea of seeing him again so soon turned my stomach upside down. I wanted to tear him to shreds for what he'd done, for how he'd manipulated me.

But if the animosity I held was so heavy... why was it I was still trying to protect him?

***

Welcome the handsome, stud Cregan Stark fan cast as Arnas Fedaravičius who plays Sihtric in The Last Kingdom.

(I'm almost positive we'll be getting Leo Suter as Cregan considering most of the HOTD cast follows him on insta, just as they did with Gayle Rankin but I'm not mad about that in the slightest hehe)

And last but not least welcome the beautiful Sara Snow, fan cast as Millie Brady who plays Lady Æthelflæd in The Last Kingdom <3