𝓔𝓵𝓪𝓮𝓷𝓪 𝓣𝓪𝓻𝓰𝓪𝓻𝔂𝓮𝓷
I didn't know where to go or who to turn to. I had no one in Kings Landing and the one person I thought I had betrayed me... cutting me where it hurt most.

Aemond had made me the most vulnerable version of myself, asked for honesty but not given it in return and I couldn't forgive him for that.

Hiding away from the noisy confines of the city I absentmindedly find myself at the beach at the very same spot I stood in my dreams the night before.

When I feel I'm finally alone I take a seat in the sand, bringing my knees up into my body cocooning myself from any other life altering pain that might come my way.

Bringing the palms of my hands over my stomach protectively the tears I've been holding come straight away, sobs wracking through my body like a tidal wave I would never escape.

Everything was a lie, all of it.

His behavior regarding the visit had been sour ever since his letter from his mother. Looking back I saw all the red flags, all the misdirections and dishonesty. It explained his unwillingness to bring me in the first place.

What would happen now?

If I tried to go home to Dragonstone would he stop me? Perhaps I would be forced to take care of both the children and raise them as our own, or they'll kill both his mistress and the boy and pretend none of it's happened.

For a few hours I stay like this staring out into the sea watching the ships come ashore until the sun sets and all that lights the beach is the moon and the stars.

I wondered if I could escape on one of the ships, leave all of this behind... but I wouldn't leave Seasmoke and Aemond knew that, he'd have guards looking everywhere for me.

"Elaena? Is that you?"

Someone beckons from behind me and I jump out of my skin but I'm relieved knowing the voice didn't belong to Aemond but another Targaryen/Velaryon in hiding much like me.

Tugging my hood tighter around my face I almost don't believe my eyes.

I hadn't seen or heard from Ser Addam since we left the Stepstones. As far as I'd known he'd helped Aemond save my life and has kept the very fragile secret of my pregnancy which was more than Corlys had managed to do.

"What are you doing out here all alone? Where's Prince Aemond?" Walking down the steep hills of sand I turn away from him, wiping my tear stained cheeks trying to regain my composure.

"We had a bit of a... argument." I chuckle, my voice breaking in my throat.

Addam's questionable gaze softens when he notices my bloodshot eyes in the moonlight and he's the spitting image of Ser Laenor when I was younger.

Placing both of his hands on my arms I flinch at his touch, craving only Aemond when he was the very one who caused this godforsaken heartbreak.

Pulling away he brings his arms back under his cloak, grasping my fragility.

"Let's get you somewhere warm. Are you hungry?" He asks gently but I can't muster up any words, shivering in the wind.

"Come on, little dragon." Addam offers a sympathetic smile, pulling my hood further down over my face. Looking around to make sure no one's watching he holds my hand tight and helps me up the hill back from which I came.

Before we reach our destination a distant rumble shakes the sky and it opens to harsh rains below.

Pulling me into a crowd of people Ser Addam brings me close, wrapping his arms around me as to not get lost. Escaping the chaos of people running for shelter we approach a small apartment tucked away in a dark alleyway near the sailing ports.

Looking around again for anyone, he yanks me inside the pitch black room shutting the door behind us.

For the terrifying moments we sat in darkness I listened to him stumble through the room to light the fire, praying to the gods trusting him wouldn't be a mistake.

Sparking the fire the small room is illuminated and I'm relieved when it's revealed to truly be just a small apartment.

Looking to me Addam senses my unease so he keeps at a distance, starting a kettle of soup over the fire.

"This is where I stay when I accompany the Velaryon fleet across the Narrow Sea. It's a shack compared to what you're used to I'm sure, but it does its job." Keeping his voice soft as not to scare me I turn my body towards the warmth of the fire, eager to change clothes but nothing to change into.

"You must be freezing. Your dress is soaked," He notices, digging through his bag for something.

Finding it he hands me a tunic and some pants that would surely swallow me whole but I was just grateful to have warm dry clothes.

Clearing my throat he laughs, "Of course, I'll step outside, Princess."

Offering me a small smile over his shoulder it holds so much.

Safety.

Trust.

Family no matter how distant.

In the warm purple irises of his eyes I see Corlys or perhaps Laenor again, but now wasn't a time to ask of parentage but maybe one day we'd have that discussion.

Closing the door behind him I hurry in ridding myself of my soaking wet clothes.

Coming close to the fire I hold out my palms, warming myself by it's rabid flames

I wondered if Seasmoke felt my heartbreak. If he was calling out to me from the depths of the Dragon pits. How quickly I'd missed my freedom.

Sliding up Addam's pants and throwing his tunic over my head I'm swimming in his monstrous clothes. Addam was a large man who had fought many battles though we were similar in age he'd seen so much more heartbreak and bloodshed.

Knocking on the door I give him the okay to come back inside.

Both of us gather by the fire, sitting rather close together to keep warm from the rain and all I can imagine is how jealous Aemond would feel if he saw me here with another man, wearing his clothes, sharing his warmth.

My chest lurches forward at the thought of him.

He had no right to be jealous. Just as I hadn't owned him as I thought, he didn't own me but my heart belonged to him just the same.

The silent seconds turn to minutes and Addam's ladling the soap into bowls, handing me one.

Feeling his eyes on me I gulp down the soup much like the stew at the camp in the Stepstones. Ignoring the bitter taste I let it warm my belly from the inside out and my body thanks me for it.

"My apologies, princess. I know it's nothing like what you would be eating at the castle." He chuckles, digging into his dinner.

"I'm just thankful to have a roof over my head and warm clothes." I reply, possibly the longest sentence I'd spoken to him tonight.

"Which you'd have at the Red Keep if you went home. Forgive me Princess, but what has he done so terribly that worth putting yourself in this danger?" He asks.

"This is not home. Dragonstone is home to me..." Trailing off he waits patiently for me to continue.

"He's been keeping something from me and I followed him into the city... and what it brought me was only darkness." I mutter, a stray tear streaking down my cheek.

The only noise that fills the thick air between us is the crackling fire wood and the pouring down rain from outside. 

"I'd never met the Prince prior to our battle at the Stepstones. I'd heard stories of his heartless nature, and cunning swordsmanship. He's quite the... well as you put it before, he's a dick but with you? My Princess, when you were hurt he was broken beyond repair. He never left your side, and threatened anyone who came close to you, me included." 

Keeping my head down I let my hair cover my face so he can't see my free falling tears.

We were so happy then. We'd just found out we were with child, it was one of the happiest nights of my life.

Had he been lying to me even since then?

"All I know is that if he was worried sick then, he'll be out of his mind worrying about you right now knowing you're alone and carrying his child in a city of rapists and thugs." He sighs.

"Than let him worry, and while he's worrying he can remember why it is I left him in the first place." The crack in my heart splinters deeper and I remember Helaena who promised even more darkness to come.

I prayed to the Gods it wouldn't get darker than this.

With not much else to do but sleep, Addam insisted I get my rest and for a few hours I did but only until my nightmares were plagued with images of Tessa's face or Aemond starting a family with her instead.

Deciding against sleep I stare at the ceiling focusing on the sounds of water dripping off the rooftops into the massive puddles from the storm.

I wondered where Aemond was at this very moment. Would he be up all night searching the city for me or would he seek vengeance first? In that way he was truly unpredictable.

Turning to my side I peek out the slits of the window into the cobblestone streets.

The peaceful silence gives way to heavy footsteps in the distance and a group of knights round the corner their torches lighting the way.

Talking amongst themselves I struggle to understand until I hear his name, "-let's hope we don't find her dead, Prince Aemond will have us all killed."

"The man's crazy. Why d-ya think she ran away in the first place?" Another chimes in but their voices fade as I watch them wander off through the alley.

I couldn't begin to imagine the hell he was unleashing trying to find me. Aemond thrived on control and dominance and though it attracted me to him just the same, he would never have a submissive, thoughtless wife and I'd thought he'd known that.

Thinking back to what I saw earlier I cling to anything that might give me hope of Aemond's innocence but no matter which way I spin it, I'd been lied to for at least a week or more.

Replaying the scene over and over again the knot tightens in my stomach when Aegon's words stained my mind.

'Mothers found something of his...'

Had the poor boy been at the castle this entire time? Held in the dungeons until the moment was most opportune?

There was only one way I'd find out.

Swinging my legs over the side of the bed I look to Addam but he doesn't stir in the slightest.

With the fire only a dim flicker of light I use the darkness to my advantage, tiptoeing to my drying cloak by the door.

Wrapping it around my shoulders I bring the hood up over my head. If I'm caught they'll take me straight to Aemond and I couldn't bare to look at him.

The storm had given way to a slight drizzle keeping most of the cities occupants in their homes if they had one.

Staying in the shadows I follow the grim road to the Red Keep fiddling with the rings on my fingers to keep my nerves at bay.

Guards stood by every entrance just as I'd suspected but that wouldn't stop me.

Scaling the same wall a few stories beneath my old chambers I use the vines to keep hold, careful not to let my hood fall.

Landing gracefully on the landing I peek through the window, jiggling the handle just right to unhinge its faulty lock.

Once stepping inside the familiar floral scent lingered from my many nights I occupied these chambers.

The many memories of Aemond and I together flooded me as I relived it all, every kiss, every confession, every nightmare.

If I'd known what would happen to us would I have done it differently?

Bringing the bed sheet to my nose I take a deep breath, my heart pounding in my chest aching for him, his hands on my skin.

No. I wouldn't have changed a thing.

Perhaps I would've clung on harder knowing our happiness was fleeting.

When I feel the tears bubbling up in my throat I toss the sheet back onto the bed and take a deep breath.

Going to the door I take weightless steps, terrified to even open it in fear there was someone waiting on the other side.

Holding my breath I crack it open, peering out into the dimly lit corridor.

Waiting for the longest few seconds of my life there's no one in sight.

If I was lucky, most of the knights and guards would be in the city looking for me, not expecting I'd be right under their noses.

Never being to the dungeons before I can only go off speculation following the staircases to the very bottom of the castle where it was specified as children never to set foot. 

Turning both ways to make sure I'm still alone a sudden snore from my left makes me jump from my bones, suppressing a squeal by slapping myself over the mouth.

Tiptoeing around the sleeping knight I peer through the cell bars, keeping quiet as to not draw attention from any other prisoners.

I almost lose hope when a white blonde head turns in the darkness and I meet his innocent lavender eyes staring back at me.

Allowing my sight to adjust in the darkness I rub at them, getting another good look at the boy because it couldn't be...

Taken aback in shock the poor boy flinches at my sharp movements, scooting back in the dirt he finds a patch of darkness though his eyes never leave me.

This was the younger of the two boys in my dream, I've seen him before.

He couldn't have been more than three or four years old... around the same age as the twins, maybe older.

Under the rags he wore, the boy was only skin and bones, wasting away in this very cell with each passing day.

"So you're what all the trouble is about..." I whisper softly reaching out my hand to him through the bars.

Unwilling to trust me he keeps away from me and I don't blame him. I could only imagine what Alicent has put him through and for how long.

This was her very own grandson, how could she treat him so poorly?

"Do they feed you little one?" I ask as quietly as I can muster, showing him I can be trusted.

He doesn't respond but he crawls forward just enough so that his terrified face is brightened by the moonlight and this time I'm ready, reeling in my shock when I see the striking resemblance to both Aegon and Aemond.

Most Targaryen men had sharp features and it didn't help that we all married within, keeping the bloodline pure just as our ancestors did. 

Even in my dreams I thought the young boy could've been mine but here he was in front of me, the son of Tessa Waters and my very own husband.

"Did they take you from your mother?"

The small boy gives a curt nod, looking around the corner expecting someone to hear us.

"What about your father?"

Narrowing his eyebrows in confusion you'd think he's never heard the word before.

Looking both ways I reach out my hand once more to him. Coming forward just enough to touch fingers I watch his eyes spark to life, a small bond of trust forming between us.

I didn't know what to do, but I knew I couldn't idly stand by and wait for this heartache to cease.

"I'll come back. I promise you, little dragon." I whisper watching the hope swirl in the young boys eyes. "But you cannot speak a single word of this to anyone, understood?" Taking my hand with both of his he nods.

Bringing his face closer he brushes my fingers across his dirtied cheek and the walls I'd built devastatingly high within the past twelve hours come tumbling down.

If my son were locked away, starving and alone I'd burn down anyone or anything in my way to get to him.

I wanted to hate this woman, hate this child for tearing apart my marriage but how could I when all they've simply done is exist and be used by the royal family?

Perhaps I wouldn't run away like the Queen wanted, perhaps I would run straight into the fire showing her just how much I belonged in the flames.

***