Hurting
Dedicated to Totalepictoast. Thanks for commenting and voting on this story.
You can play the song whenever. Hope you enjoy it.
Long A/N at the end.
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I wake up to the sunlight streaming in through the window. 'I must've fallen asleep,' I muse. I stretch, yawning as I do so. I should probably check on Jack, make sure he's ok.
I get up, stumbling slightly. I walk across the hall towards Jack's room. I peek in the doorway, seeing him sleeping not-so-peacefully. His face is scrunched up and his hands are tightened into fists. Soft whimpering sounds flit towards me through the air.
I stay in place for a moment - stunned - before I rush to his bedside. I gently shake him, trying to wake him up. The whimpering grows louder, turning into a kind of whine. Like a lost puppy.
"Jack, wake up," I tell him, shaking him a little harder. He begins to wake up, ceasing the whimpering. His eyes slowly open. He looks at me with bleary eyes.
"What?" He mumbles, sleep making his accent thicker then usual.
"You were having a nightmare," I tell him, giving him a sympathetic look.
His face darkens at the word nightmare. He blinks the sleepiness from his eyes, looking more awake. He gestures for me to leave and I do so, hesitantly.
I shut the door behind me and lean against it. I hear the sound of shuffling clothing and muffled talking on the other end.
"Signe baby, I'm sorry. I'm so, so sorry. Please come back. I miss you." His voice cracks and I can tell that he's crying.
My heart hurts for Jack, for the pain he's going through. I know this pain too well. With... Him. He used to be so nice, so sweet.
¥¥ Flashback ¥¥
I anxiously finish getting dressed. I mess with my hair, trying to make it look good. I pull it up into a messy bun. I hear a knock at the door and rush to get it, grabbing a thin coat on the way out. I pull open the door excitedly, revealing him.
"You look beautiful," he says as he pulls out a bouquet of red roses from behind his back. My face heats up a little at his compliment. I give him a shy smile.
"Thanks," I say, grabbing the roses from his outstretched hand. I walk inside to put them in a vase. "Come on in," I tell him over my shoulder.
I go over to the kitchen and pull out a vase. I fill it with water and put the roses in. I carry the vase over to the tiny kitchen table we have, setting it on the middle. I admire them for a minute, taking in their beauty.
I feel arms wrap around my waist, pulling me close. He rests his chin on my head, swaying me softly for some reason. He presses a kiss to my temple.
"I love you," he murmurs quietly into my ear. I turn around in his arms, facing him. My heart beating slightly faster then usual.
"I love you, too," I tell him. A smile spreads across his face, and he picks me up swinging me around. Giggles escapes my lips. He sets me down and frames my face with his hands, cradling it. He leans down and kisses my lips softly, happily.
¥¥ Flashback Over ¥¥
I feel tears slipping down my face at the thought of him. At the thought of the first time we said those words. Of how he didn't mean them, but I put every bit of emotion I had into them. I guess that was our downfall in the end.
He cared too little, I cared too much.
And how when he changed, when he stopped being the loving caring boyfriend, I still loved him. And I still do now. I shouldn't, but I do. I hate that I love him. I didn't stay because I was scared, or weak. I stayed because I love him, no matter what.
I realize I'm on the floor, I must have crouched down. I put my head in my hands and wish I didn't love him. Soft cries echo from the other side of the door.
I pull myself together, putting on my indifferent mask. I get up and head downstairs. I look in the kitchen for something to eat. There's Eggo waffles in the freezer. I pull a few out and pop them in the toaster.
When they're done, I grab them carefully and toss them on a plate. I butter them and drizzle some syrup on them. I grab a fork and head upstairs, to Jack's room. I knock on his door. I wait a moment, no response. I hesitantly push the door. It swings open.
I step inside and look around. His room is clean. It's not perfect, but everything is where it's supposed to be. 'Focus!' I tell myself sternly. I look around again, Jack's not here. I have a sense of panic and dread. I need to find him. I lightly toss the plate onto his bed.
"Jack?" I call out. No response. My panic increases. 'You don't have much time!' My subconscious yells at me. I look around the room, seeing a door that's half-open.
I run to it without thinking. I look inside to see Jack on the floor. Tears streaming down his face, razor blade in hand, inching it closer to his wrist. I stand still for a moment - shocked.
"Jack?" I call out softly. He startles, his head snapping up to look at me. He looks scared - no, terrified. He looks terrified. His eyes are red and the iris is dark.
I step towards him carefully. I crouch to his level. His eyes stay locked with mine. I reach out a hand towards his, grabbing the razor. He flinches when I touch him.
I toss the razor somewhere behind me. I inch closer to Jack. We're just inches away, our breaths mingling together. Our eyes still locked.
I slowly lift a hand, reaching it out towards his face. I gently cup his face with one hand, wiping away his tears with my thumb. He leans his head into my hand. I put my other hand on the other side of his face.
I don't say anything, I just wipe away his tears. Because that's what he needs right now. Someone to trust, who understands what he needs.
And I understand all too well.
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Ok, wow. This part was extremely easy to write, surprisingly. I wrote it in a couple hours. Usually I have some issues writing, but not today.
I hope you enjoyed the double update. Imma say that I'm doing this to celebrate 700 reads and 50 votes. Not because I have no life. Ok? Ok.
I hope you like the song. (A little bit stronger by Sara Evens) It took me quite a while to find it. It might not fit as well as I want it to, but I tried. Let me know if you liked it.
Also, I just saw that this is the 10th chapter. (Not counting A/Ns and the intro). It feels like it's been longer. Or is it just me? I don't know.
Edit: I have decided to leave the A/Ns since that's what you all decided.
As always, leave feedback on how this chapter was. Or comment how your day was. I love reading your guys' comments. Vote if you liked the chapter.
I'll see you all in the next part! (Next weekend, hopefully)
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