Chapter 35: Storm Within

It's been raining nonstop for the past few days. Pavements and walkways were wet. The campus was dotted with muddy poddles and multi colored umbrellas. Students run around campus, covering their heads and cursing the bad weather.

Almost every people I came across with was donning cardigans or sweaters. The weather was too cozy for studies, and students could be seen dozing on their seats.

But it didn't prevent teachers from giving large amount of lectures. Students run around campus, from building to building, finishing requirements.

Martes ng hapon nang dumerecho ako sa coffee shop. The rain's becoming heavier. Umbrellas weren't enough to keep anyone dry. I arrived with a wet shoulder and a damp hair.

Maureen handed me a mini towel at the locker room. Pinunasan ko agad ang aking sarili.

"Hindi ka dapat nagpapaka basa," sinabi niya. "Mahirap magkasakit."

"I'm waterproof," I joked.

Maureen made a face. "No one's exempted from this weather no matter how strong you are."

It was quite a hectic day at the coffee shop. The warmth of the roasting coffee beans and coziness of the shop attracted customers who wanted to take refuge from the rain.

Mag hahating gabi na nang magsara ang shop. Miss Van wasn't at the coffee shop today. Hindi din siya dumaaan. Maging kami ay nagtaka.

Maureen said she must be enjoying the weather in the comforts of her house. I was hoping it's as simple as that. She barely skips visiting the shop. If she did, it's always for a good reason.

--

The bad weather continued for several days. The campus was drearier than usual. I gripped my jacket tightly against my body as I walk through the nearly deserted pathway.

Pagpasok ko sa classroom, ilang estudyante lang ang nadatnan ko. When I ask my seatmate, she told me that classes were suspended for the day.

I wasn't so updated when it comes to things like this because I don't have someone to ask or to inform me about it.

Muli akong umuwi. The rain was heavier than usual. Nahirapan akong maghanap ng masasakyan. Almost all the remaining students on the campus were struggling to go home.

Dumating ako sa bahay na basang basa at inuubo. Nagpalit agad ako ng damit at piniling matulog bago ang shift ko sa coffee shop. My body felt heavy, and the occasion headache wasn't helping.

Hapon na noong magising ako. I woke up dazed and disoriented. Patuloy parin ang ulan sa labas. Tiningnan ko ang orasan. I'm nearly late for work.

Tumayo ako upang magpalit. But I immediately grip the bedside table as my vision swayed.

I check my temperature using the thermometer as the bathroom. It seems like I caught the fever Maureen was referring to me the other day.

Uminom ako ng ilang gamot bago pumasok sa coffee shop. Nadatnan ko si Miss Van sa dati niyang pwesto sa sulok ng shop. But her face lost its usual elegance I used to see from her everyday. Tila may bumabagabag sa kanya.

Because of the class suspension, mangilan ngilan lang ang customers sa shop. By afternoon, only a couple at a corner table remains as the heavy rain outside continues.

Naglilinis ako ng mga tables nang ipatawag ako ni Miss Van. Agad ko siyang pinuntahan. She's sitting at one of the booths on the corner of the shop. She looks restless.

"Yes, Miss Van?"

She motioned for me to sit. Nagtaka ako ngunit sumunod parin sa kanya. Moments passed and the only noise between us was the rain pelting against nearby windows.

"Helena and I, we grew up together."

Nagtaka ako kung bakit niya biglang sinabi yon sa akin. But I let her, because it seems it's the only way for her to breathe from whatever was bothering her.

"She had a rough childhood. She grew up in a family where illegal things were the means of living. Drugs, black market trades. She was forced to be part of these. And she badly wanted to get away from it."

Miss Van caressed her hands as if going through the memories was also a torture for her.

"She went through a blood contract thinking it would save her from her hell of a life. But it was another hell on earth with a vampire family who were no better than hers."

But I couldn't concentrate fully with what Miss Van was saying. My head was pounding due to the fever.

"Several months after her first contract, her family died in the midst of a drug chase. She was left alone. Helena tried to work on her own several jobs at a time. Until she met Landon Monaghan."

Miss Van heaved a deep sigh.

"The Monaghans, a well-known pure blood vampire family. It's almost surreal that someone like Landon Monaghan was looking for her. He helped her escape the contract and promised to protect her."

"It was years of being with Landon that I finally saw Helena smiling, happy. I've never saw her so contented, so in loved."

I gripped my hands. Kasabay ng panghihina na aking nararamdaman ay ang sakit mula sa mga salitang aking naririnig.

"But like any other things in Helena's life, the one with Landon ended up badly. Nalaman ko nalang na isa na siya sa mga casualties ng isang insidente ng hotel fire."

"I couldn't blame her. She'd do everything to get away from her life. But it became the reason why she completely lost it."

Miss Van stared at the wet, darkened street.

"Ngunit may mga bagay parin siyang ginawa na hindi ko magawang sang-ayunan hanggang sa ngayon."

Muling humarap si Miss Van sa akin.

"Helena wasn't perfect. It there's one thing you had in common, it's not the face but the determination to live despite the bad things that happened in your life. And whatever she might have done, I hope you can forgive her, Denise."

--

Maagang nagsara ang shop. Lumakas ang ulan nang pauwi na ako sa bahay. Tree tops sway, curtains of rain hit roofs in angry rhythm, windows shatter beneath the wind.

My fever had worsen from working and going under the rain. Gusto kong matulog na lamang dahil sa bigat ng aking pakiramdam. I prepared myself a cold compress, a small towel, and a glass of water for medicines.

This is the first time I had a fever in a long time. Dati nandyan si Elyse upang bantayan ako, alagaan. Hindi niya ako iniiwan kapag may sakit ako. I miss her. Because right now, in the midst of a storm, I was alone.

I pressed the cold compress on my forehead as I try to sleep. The wind was howling outside making the nearby trees scrape their branches against the walls of the house. I closed my eyes and let the noises fill my mess-up mind, and moments later I was enveloped by a familiar dream.

"Denise."

"Denise, anak?"

"Kailangan munang umalis ni Papa."

"Ano man ang marinig o makita mo, ito ang lagi mong tatandaan. Mahal na mahal ko kayo, anak."

--

Nagmulat ako ng mata. Bumungad sa akin ang madilim na paligid. Napahawak ako sa aking pisngi. Hindi ko namalayan ang pagtulo ng luha dito.

It's been a while since I dreamed of my father. Elyse once told me na sa tuwing nagkaka-sakit ako ay lagi kong napapanaginipan ang aking ama.

Ang mga huling salitang sinabi niya bago niya sinira ang aming pamilya ang patuloy na bumabalik sa akin. Sinubukan ko itong panghawakan. Pilit ko siyang hinanap, umasa na babalik siya sa amin. But he never did.

Umupo ako sa kama. The storm's on its peak. Nawalan ng ilaw sa buong bahay. Napatitig ako sa labas ng bintana. Maybe it was the fever, or the nightmare, or the fact that I was all alone, that send fresh wave of tears down my cheeks.

Pinahid ko ang aking mga luha. Don't be a baby, Denise. You have to be stronger than this.

Muli akong humiga at natulog, trying to forget all the things that's been bothering me for the past few days.

Halos mag-uumaga na nang maramdaman ko ito. Someone was putting a new set of cold compress on my forehead.

At first, I thought it was just a dream. But I could feel the bed dipped as someone sat beside me.

"You suffered a fever alone the whole night. And you didn't even tell anyone. What would I do to you, Denise?"

Tuluyan akong naalimpungatan dahil sa familiar na boses. Binuksan ko ang aking mga mata.

I was greeted by the natural light from the window. The sky outside remained grey. Ngunit bahagya nang humina ang ulan.

Umupo ako sa kama. Pinagmasdan ko ang taong nasa harapan ko at nakatitig sa akin. I smiled weakly. Bumuntong hininga siya.

"Hard headed Denise."

I missed him.

And there's no greater feeling that seeing him in front of me, in a dreary morning, with the lights washing his face.

Inabot ko ang kanyang mukha at hinawakan. And just like the storm outside, the storm within me simmered down at the sight of him. My Landon Monaghan.

"Are you feeling better?"

Tumango ako. He didn't seem convinced. I noticed that Landon lost some weight, and there's light dusting of stubble under his chin and sharp jaw.

"I miss you, Landon."

Landon stared at me. "Come here."

I felt his arms wrapped around my body. "I was so worried about you I thought I'm going to be crazy."

I leaned against him. Hindi ko namalayan ang pagdausdos ng aking mga luha. Things were just so hard recently but seeing him makes everything worth it.

"Hey, hey why are you crying?"

He held my face to stare at him. Pinahid niya ang aking mga luha.

"I'm sorry I wasn't there when you needed me the most. But I won't leave you this time, Denise."

We weren't supposed to meet, let alone stay by each other's side. Kaya natatakot ako sa maaaring maging kapalit nito.

***