Chapter 28: The Invitation

Nakaharap si River habang nakaupo ako sa kama at sapo ang aking mukha. Hindi ko siya matignan nang derecho sa mga mata kahit pa nakatitig siya sa akin.

"I'm sorry," ito ang paulit ulit kong binabanggit.

River sighed. "You don't have to be."

"But this... this is not me."

"What you're feeling right now is the post transition effect. Normal lang ito. The sooner you'll accept the truth, the easier it is for your body to adjust."

Dumako ang tingin ko sa sugat na ginawa ko sa wrist ni River.  "Will it affect you?" I asked.

I've been with them long enough to know that for every blood exchange comes certain consequences.

"It doesn't matter," River said. "Mas alalahanin mo ang sarili mo. The blood I provided will last for weeks. Once you felt the urge, call me."

"Will I... will I hurt others if ever I felt the blood lust?" I asked.

Ito ang pinaka-kinakatakot kong mangyari, ang mapahamak ang mga taong nakapaligid sa akin dahil sa pagbabagong ito.

"You won't. As long as I'm your first blood, you'd crave my blood more than any blood. It's like a blood contract without commitment."

Natigilan ako sa kanyang sinabi. I've put River in an uneasy position. Dahil siya ang una kong hiningan ng tulong ay hindi siya nagkaroon ng pagpipilian.

"I'm so sorry."

I don't even know if he's currently into other contract or if he ever planned to have one.

"Hey, human girl who is not so human anymore. Stop apologizing for things that are out of your control. The world owes you some luck too. Don't be too hard on yourself."

Tumayo siya at nag stretch. "Well, I have to keep going."

Hinatid ko si River sa labas ng apartment. Malamig ang hangin ng gabi na dumampi sa aking balat.

"Call when you need a lifeline." River smiled his all too familiar dimpled smile. "Loosen up a little, Althea Denise."

Matapos ang ilan paalala ay umalis na siya gamit ang kanyang sasakyan. Sinubukan kong gawin ang kanyang sinabi. But I still found myself that night staining my sheet with my tears.

--

Dumating si Elyse kinabukasan. Nadatnan niya akong nakahiga sa kama at nakatalukbong ng kumot. I heard her came into my room to check on me. Marahil nagtaka siya dahil nagkukulong ako sa kwarto.

"You okay?" I heard her asked.

Tumango ako mula sa ilalim ng kumot. I don't want her to see my pale and puffy face.

"May sakit ka ba, Denise?" Muli niyang tanong.

Umiling ako. "Just tired," I lied.

Tumahimik siya. Alam kong may gusto siyang sabihin. Gusto niya akong kausapin.

Elyse sighed. "Okay then. I'll let you rest."

I heard her walked out of the room. My breathing was suspended until I heard the click of the door knob closed. Hindi ko pa kayang harapin si Elyse.

--

Bandang tanghali nang lumabas ako ng kwarto at bumaba sa kusina. Nadatnan ko si Elyse na naghahanda ng pagkain. Omelet and a kind of salad. It was rare to see her preparing food in the kitchen. She barely cook.

"Hey," bati ko.

She looked up and smiled. "Nagluto ako para sayo."

Guilt suddenly ate me. I was avoiding her for all the wrong reasons. For loving someone she's in love with.

I made myself a cup of coffee. Tinulungan ko si Elyse sa paghahanda sa mesa. All the while, Elyse was biting her lower lip. A telltale sign that's she's in an argument with herself.

Nang patapos na kaming kumain doon lumabas ang mga salitang bumabagabag kay Elyse.

"The guy... the guy you saw last Friday..." She started.

I can feel my throat tightening. "How about him?" Balewalang tanong ko.

"I know you know him."

Halos mabitawan ko ang kubyertos na hawak ko.

"He's the person I was referring to. Yong taong gustong gusto ko."

Hindi ko alam kung makakahinga ako nang maluwag o masasaktan sa kanyang sinabi.

"I had an eye for him since forever. Before I even met you."

There's a stab in my heart with the last statement.

"I... I know."

Elyse smiled. "I know you do. I'm dating him now. But it's not enough. I really want him to be mine, Denise."

I tried to nod despite the fact that my palms were cold and my eyes sting.

"Will you help me?"

I opened my mouth to speak but no words came out. Bawat salitang lumalabas sa kanyang bibig ay tila kutsilyo na tumatarak sa aking puso.

"I... I can't."

Elyse blinked. "What?"

I forced a smile. "It's not like I know him," I said.

Tila nakahinga siya nang maluwag sa dahilan na aking sinabi. Hinawakan ni Elyse ang nanlalamig kong kamay. I nearly flinched.

"But I want your full support on this," she said. "Will you promise me?"

I don't know why Elyse is telling this to me right now. I was caught in between. She stared at me, hopeful. And I know I could never let her down.

"I promise."

It's not like my feelings for Landon would lead to anywhere. Hanggang may nararamdaman ako para sa kanya ay pahihirapan ko lang ang aking sarili.

I don't want to water a dead plant. Especially when all it did was to entrap me with its root until I bleed. Maybe this is what I needed. The commitment and reality slap to completely stop.

--

Sinubukan kong pagtuunan ng pansin ang aking bagong buhay. Kung paano ako maga-adjust sa pagbabagong ito. I'm not human anymore. And the fact still hurts me like a dagger digging into my flesh.

But it did have some benefits. Naging mas alerto ako. Madali kong napi-pick ang galaw, mga ingay sa paligid. I could also feel other people's intention towards with. The way their eyes shift, or the uneasy movement of their feet. I can move faster, but still manage to control my balance. This is maybe why a lot of vampires are swift and graceful.

The blood in my veins makes my heart beat faster, aggressive. Like I always woke up from a long and nice sleep. I felt renewed.

--

It was Friday evening when I received an invitation. It was enclosed in a small black envelope with a red ribbon and the gold seal of the family.

The Monaghans.

Nakita ko ito sa mail box ng apartment. Noong una ay hindi ko inisip na para sa akin ito. But there it was. Encraved in gold cursive letters was my name.

Ms. Althea Denise Limerick.

Binuksan ko ang invitation habang papasok sa apartment. It was for Yllona's 22nd birthday. Umupo ako sa stool sa kusina at pinagmasdan ang papel. I never knew her birthday. I never really knew anything about them.

Bandang gabi nang tanungin ko si River tungkol dito. Gusto ko ding malaman kung bakit hindi kasama ang pangalan niya sa celebrant considering Yllona and him are twins.

"Never really like formal celebration," balewala niyang sagot. "I'll pick you up tomorrow evening?"

Hindi ako nakasagot. Base on the invitation and knowing Yllona, it will be a glamorous party.

I heard River chuckled at the other side of the line. "You're having second thoughts, aren't you? Isa ka sa mga inaasahan ni Yllona na darating. Yllona is a pain in the ass, but please don't let her down."

Despite the situation napangiti ako sa pagiging malapit ni River sa kanyang kapatid.

"But I... I don't..."

"I'll pick you up a few hours earlier to prepare you."

Mabilis akong tumanggi. "No. You don't have to."

Gusto kong pumunta. Gusto kong personal na batiin si Yllona at mayakap siya sa kanyang importanteng araw. Ngunit siguradong nandoon siya. Hindi ko gustong muli siyang makita.

"You will see him there, Denise," sinabi ni River na tila nabasa ang aking iniisip.

"You will cross paths no matter what you do. But these limitations you set aren't from him. It's from you. Loosen up, Denise."

Matapos ang tawag ay bumuntong hininga ako. River is right. These limitations I've set is due to my fear of pain, not knowing these also deprive me of happiness I needed.

--

Sabado ng gabi ang birthday celebration ni Yllona sa kanyang tirahin. Ngunit hapon palang ay sinundo na ako ni River. I didn't expect him to arrive early. I was in my shabby clothes with uncombed hair and bare face when I greeted him at the door.

"H-Hey," bati ko.

He bit his lips to prevent a smile. And that defined the depth of his dimples.

"What?" Seryoso kong tanong.

Umiling siya habang nangingiti parin. "Let's go."

"Go where-"

Bago ko pa matapos ang aking sasabihin ay hinila na niya ako palabas ng apartment. "Hey!" I exclaimed. "Wait up."

I locked the apartment door and close the gate. "River-"

"Not so human girl, hurry up. This will be an incredible night."

--

Nasa passenger seat ako ng sasakyan ni River. I grew accustomed to the interior of it. From the leather seat to the medium tinted window, to the smell of citrus pines.

I was wearing an oversized white shirt and square pants. I looked overwhelmingly out of place compared to River's sleek look of gray polo shirt and brown pants. But I didn't feel uneasy. River don't pay much attention to these kind of things.

Lumipas ang halos isang oras bago kami nakarating sa isang private property sa labas ng city. The house was situated along a street where a few victorian houses where located. The street was peaceful, clean. The road was plotted with classic looking lamp post and trimmed bushes. This is River's neighborhood.

"Do you always have your own mansions or houses?"  Tanong ko. Halos kaedad ko lang sila, and it's clear that they are way privileged than I'll ever be.

Napangiti si River sa tanong ko. "When you turned eighteen, commonly and regalo na makukuha mo ay isa sa mga properties ng pamilya."

Derecho ang tingin niya sa daan habang nagsasalita.

"A house couldn't hold too much cunning and manipulative creatures. Madalas magkaroon ng gulo at alitan sa pamilya. So giving someone his own property is not necessary luxury but to save us from the chaotic environment. That's what the elders say."

"Oh." Tanging nasabi ko.

"Alam mo ang pakiramdam na magsama sama ang pamilya. You've see it with your own eyes. Thick atmosphere. A time bomb waiting to happen. This party is not actually our choice. It's a requirement. Our family held parties to strenghten connections.  Yllona and I didn't want it. But one of us is obligated to celebrate somehow, so Yllona will do it."

Tuluyan akong tahimik. Their family seems so perfect on the outside. A prestigious poweful family. But when you look closely, behind the crystal lights are broken pieces.

Pumasok ang sasakyan sa loob ng driveway. Compared to the other Monaghan mansions, River's is more homey, with a lot of plants and open space.

Binati kami ng butler pagdating. "Magandang hapon, Sir James."

"James?" Tanong ko kay River.

Napa-ubo si River na tila isang bagay ito na hindi niya gustong malaman ng iba.

"It's James River Monaghan," mahina niyang sinabi.

Lumapad ang ngiti ko. Mapang asar. "Hey, James."

"Stop it."

Pumasok kami sa mansion. Ang mga katulong ay pareho ang bati sa kanya.

"Magandang hapon, Sir James."

River muttered something. The people around us are approachable, smiling. Makikita na masaya sila sa kanilang mga trabaho. They have River for a boss after all.

His house is a mixture of classic and modern. May mga flat screen tv and oversized stereo, ngunit meron ding muwebles na gawa sa kahoy, marmol na sahig; a motif of black and white.

Dinala niya ako sa pangalawang palapag kung saan naghihintay ang ilang mga babae na tila hinire niya para sa okasyon na ito. Ngumiti sila at yumuko nang makita kami.

"Do I really have to do this?" Tanong ko kay River.

He smiled and ruffled my already messy hair. "You're one of us, now. What's better way to introduce a new comer than a party?"

***