Chapter 39 - Too Many Goodbye's

Goodbye.

Strange isn't it??

Just a Simple Word, a Simple Expression

But it can be implied in so many different way's.

And come to think of it,as kids in school, we were taught this as a normal word, just like any other.

Why didn't anyone ever teach us about the true facts, and the hidden meaning,behind it??

Maybe, because we were meant to learn about it, in our journey of Life.

Yes, its a simple word to say, a very common way of expression

Yet it is a powerful tool of the Heart.

For the emotion that a goodbye can stirr,

is usually high on the intensity meter.

I strongly feel,that this particular expression can be categorised into different forms.

There are a few goodbye's that are bittersweet,

because you know that you are parting only for a short while, and will surely meet again.

Then there are a few goodbye's that are happy,because they are only said, as a gesture to just simply say - until we meet again.

For sometimes, parting is just unevitable, due to certain situations in our lives.

Then there are those goodbye's that happen,because they were destined to be.

In the sense, that in our Lives, sometimes people come in for a reason, or a particular season, and then thats it, they leave,because that was how it is supposed to be.We often meet people, become friends, spend good time together, and once the path in life changes, we all go our different ways.Happens, to all of us.

Thus, these goodbye's are destined goodbyes,that leave back most a memory that will either give you a tear in the eye, or a smile on your Lips.

And then there are those goodbye's, the most painful ones,the silent goodbye's

they happen quietly, with no words said, no explanations, the door shuts on our faces, just like that.

These goodbye's usually hurt the most.

These goodbye's will come back to haunt you in your dreams, probably till the end of time, will always make you wonder why it happened?

This kind of goodbye usually happens if a person in reference is fleeing a situation, or running a marathon against emotions,and it is surely the most painful solution to a problem in hand.

And honestly its not really the goodbye bit that hurts the most, it's the aftermath of rewind,pause,and play of memories that hurts the most.

But Despite being what it is,its a situation we have all been in, in our lives, sometimes in one of its form,and then the other time, in one of its other forms.

For we can't really escape a goodbye, no matter, how happy, bittersweet,destined, or painful it is meant to be.

Its true isn't it?

We all have faced that one moment in our lives when it really is all about - Too Many Goodbye's.

.........................................

Ten Days Later

Tuesday

Barkat - 10.00 AM

Zoya sat on the chair in the shower cabinet, and she let the hot water run over her. She really did feel that hot water was like her own personal therapy, she loved how it calmed her nerves.

Ofcourse,due to her condition with her leg, she couldn't really stand and enjoy a long shower,and honestly this idea of sitting under a shower was really good.She didn't really have much choice, she had to enjoy it no matter what.

She was glad that she had let Khushi get ready first, so that she could take her time, and take her time she would,for she had a lot to process, a lot to think.A lot had happened over the last ten days.Time had just flown by, and she was glad, she didn't want it to crawl like a snail anyway.

Six days ago, her marriage had been annulled.She felt shivers go through her as she recalled the intensity of Asad's gaze on her as she signed the last of the annulment formalities, in front of the judge.She had signed them first this time around.His pained face, his anguished eyes, that still found a way of boring into her soul, came back revolving in front of her eyes.Ofcourse, it took every ounce of her strength to sign the papers with a straight face, without a tear in her eye, and she was glad she had done so, without meeting his eyes, because she knew, if she would have looked into them,she would have given herself away.

Three days ago, Khushi came home from the hospital,and although the plan was initially to leave Barkat as soon as Khushi was safely back home, she had stayed back, only on Khushi's request, for three more days,because Khushi insisted that she wanted to spend time with her, as much as she could, before she went away,so she would visit Shantivan in the evenings, spend time with her family, but return to Barkat for the night.But she also had agreed to Khushi, because that treacherous heart of her's found it as an excuse to store in a few more memories of Asad.Although these memories were mostly pained ones, of anguished exchange of glances, of painful silences,because even though Asad had tried to talk to her while she was alone, she made it a point to have no communication with him. Everytime he had come close to actually make her want to respond, her mind had succeeded in guiding her to walk away.And to her luck, Asad hadn't pushed her, probably because, he didn't want to cause her any more pain.And thats why she was doing this, she didn't want to cause Asad any more pain, and it was such a irony, for she knew she would be doing so nonetheless.Being away or being here, was the same, she was still causing Asad pain.She knew the only way she could stop causing him any, would be to go back to him as his Zoya, but she knew she couldn't do that,so this was inevitable.

And now finally, the time was here, to leave.She had her flight for 3.00 am.She would be leaving for the airport at Midnight.

She had packed her bags, and had her suitcases ready.There was a time, when she would only pack last minute, for she couldn't sit, if the suitcase was packed, but that had changed of course,along with everything else in her life,strange how little things that make you change by default of your actions in Life.

Tonight, there was a family dinner for everyone, which her mother had arranged at Shantivan.It was being held for two reasons, one to mark the big Khan- Raizada reunion, and second, to finally have everyone together under the same roof, before she would leave.

For she had no idea, when she would be coming back,she had no clue how long her recovery would take.

The last few days of her life had taught her a lot of things.

It really was Strange, how Life can change so drastically in such little time.

It really was Strange, how sometimes, you are just a audience to the contents of your Life.

It exalt was Strange, how sometimes you really do sit and watch your Life drag you by its thread.

But what other option do you have, than to move forward??.Only if Life was kind enough to actually give us some real options to choose from. Sometimes, this thread of life, would get so caught up in a web of tangles, that it really was hard to decide which tangle to address first. And so, you just move forward no matter how hard it is, no matter how excruciatingly painful it is, for that really is our job as passengers in this train of Life. We will often come across so many stations, and we don't really realise the importance of the Happy stations until they are gone, and you are left sitting on a chair, looking back, at what it had been.And you wonder then, whether to laugh or cry,for destiny has ironically given you that one moment to mourn the happiness that once was a part of your Life.

And maybe, looking back isn't going to help,and this is why we are meant to move on nonetheless,even though the path ahead is uncertain, you have no option but to continue walking, but can you ever for real get rid of that baggage on your shoulders?

She didn't know yet.She was going forward, moving forward, flying away from here, ready to run the marathon against her emotions, but she had no clue, if she could ever learn to let go of that baggage of emotions on her shoulders.And not just that, maybe, she wasn't ready to let go, yet,atleast in her being, she could hold onto to Asad,even though in reality she was going to let him go.

She finally wiped her tears, and she shut the shower, and wrapped a towel around herself,and she held the cabinet for support as she stepped out,and picked up her crutch, adjusted it under her left shoulder,and she bent forward and wiped the dew on the mirror with one hand, and looked at her reflection,and she smiled in pure irony - even her reflection wasn't the same anymore.

And that was one thing she had learnt, about mirrors over time.

That the Reflection, that stared back at you,as you looked into the Mirror, never really Lied.

It would always stand in your face, looking back at you,and remind you, of what your Life was at the present.

She remembered a childhood fairytale, but she realised for real in that moment, that- this Mirror on the wall, always spoke the truth.

..........

Asad put on his waistcoat as he finished getting ready.There was a important board meeting today,over the past few days he had been doing everything he could, to distract himself, from the pain he otherwise was feeling inside.

There was so much guilt of both the past and the present, so much pain, so much anguish, he couldn't really escape it, he knew it would take time to heal him through it,and then of course the situation of Zoya leaving, only added more salt to his wounds.But he knew, he couldn't keep addressing the same issue for long, when all he had got for the last ten days was a painful silence.And it really did seem, that his holding on for now was only making the matters worse, because this string in between them was just getting more and more twisted.And so, he had just let it be, no matter how painful it was, he knew, the best thing for now, was to just be silent and let Zoya be.

He was glad though, that she had still stayed back,after Khushi was home, gave him the chance to store few more memories.

Gosh, this was really hard.Why hadn't anyone ever told him that , it would take every ounce of his patience to watch everything break infront of his eyes,and he was helpless, and that only made it worse.

He took a deep breathe as he remembered Kkusum Maa's words to him from two days before - " You gotta be patient Asad, i know its very difficult, but its what you need,sometimes, thats just how Life gets, ever seen a bird building its nest beta?? it starts with carefully picking out every single straw and then builds its home with so much labour and patience, sometimes in Life that's what we have to do, take small steps, and you will see that things will start taking shape,Asad, i know what im saying is cryptic, but it is true, it does take drops of water to make a sea,several threads to make a garment, and i know i could go on giving you examples, but the bottom line is, that this is nothing but a test of your strength and patience my son, slowly and steadily do things to make your Life what it was, and everything will be fine, you have to move forward, no matter how hard it is, for how long do you want to torture yourself looking backwards?? it isn't going to give you anything, but pain,be patient my son, it always does take a while, until the flowers bloom again..."

She was right, she was so right.

But these days and nights, had a weight as heavy as Mt Everest on his shoulders.He couldn't really sleep.And he could only think if there really was a way to make this easier.And he hadn't found any way out.He had never felt more stuck in his life ever before.Everything in front of him was so uncertain, everything lay broken in front of him, which piece could he start with?? He didn't really know.

But he knew he couldn't keep sulking, he had to have faith, that there was a light at the end of this dark tunnel,and he had to keep walking to finally reach it.

That really was the only way out.

And he was glad that he wasn't alone in this moment of misery, he had his ammi, and Khushi, and then of course Arnav, Anjali di, Kkusum maa, and the rest of the Raizada's too,everyone was being as supportive as they could be, and how could he ever thank them enough for standing by him in this time??

And this kindness, their immense kindness was also bringing back the guilt of the past, he knew in his heart that he had to figure his way out of that too, and he knew it would take him time to get out of it too.And he had also learnt a thing about Guilt - It really was more tangled than the spiders web.Once it had you in its grip, you had to really struggle to find your way back out of it.

But in his heart, there still was that flicker of hope, because no matter how hard Zoya tried, he had on several occasions spotted that longing in her eyes,too.

He knew he had to keep faith,even though right now Zoya was leaving, he had to believe that only something good would come their way through it.

He picked up a glass of water, and gulped it down to calm his nerves.Tonight, there was a family dinner at Shantivan, and then Zoya was leaving.

How could he bid Goodbye to the love of his Life, when he knew she was embarking on a journey that was taking her far away from him?

He didn't know, but this was a moment he couldn't escape.

He walked out his room, and closed the door, and just as he was crossing khushi's room, he had a sudden urge to look inside, for he knew Zoya would be in there.

He knocked, and he heard her voice from inside - " come on in Khushi, is that you??...", he didn't answer, but he stepped inside, and she was keeping something inside the cupboard,so the door blocked her vision and she didn't see him and he heard her continue - " im just done, and im hungry too, i hope you all ate, and what about your bhaijaan, please tell me he ate breakfast before leaving, he hasn't been eating well lately..."

It felt good to know that she was keen to know whether he ate or not.

He took a deep breathe,and he walked ahead towards her, and right then she closed the cupboard, and registered in the sight of him in front of her, and he saw her mask her emotions and she said looking away - " i thought it was Khushi...how come you haven't left yet??"

Asad took a deep breathe and he said - " go on, why don't you ask me what you were asking Khushi??"

Zoya shrugged - " ask what??"

Asad - " ask me if iv eaten , tell me that you are worried that i haven't been eating well lately...why don't you tell me that yourself...rather than this hide and seek..."

Zoya walked with her crutch to the bed, and she sat down,and she looked at him as she said without any emotion in her voice - " yeah ok...fine...so what..its just a genuine question...",and she paused as she looked at him and she said softly - " it would make me feel better, if you took better care of yourself Asad, can you promise me that?? that you will take good yourself while im gone..."

Asad was taken off guard, this was the first sentence she had spoken to him in the last ten days, with some emotion in her voice,and he walked on reflex and sat next to her as he looked around the room and he said - " so this time around, i can see you packed your bags well before time..."

Zoya nodded as she said - " yeah...for a change..."

Asad smiled at a memory as he said on reflex - " i still remember how you literally sat on your suitcase to shut it close when we were leaving Boston...i was amused Zoya, very amused...trust me..."

Zoya smiled,as she recalled the incident and she looked at him just as he looked at her and their eyes locked,and she whispered - " good old times..."

Asad nodded as he said - "yes... good old times...",and he asked - " are you sure you got everything you need??"

Zoya looked at him,as she said - " yes, Asad...".But she felt her heart scream, that she didn't really have everything,because he was everything, and she was leaving him behind.

Asad nodded - " good, and for the first time in ten days, you are actually talking to me, so can i ask you something?? i mean you can answer if you wish too..no compulsion.."

Zoya nodded.

Asad on reflex caught hold of her hand, surprising her and he asked softly - " are you really not going to keep in touch with me once you are gone?? for real?? is this really it??"

Zoya didn't pull her hand away, as she felt his touch and she looked into his eyes as she whispered - " its for the best Asad, for both of us..."

Asad - " you really dont want me to get in touch with you?? honestly, is that what you really want??"

Zoya felt her insides burn but she said - "yes..id like that Asad..."

Asad looked into her eyes and he didn't let go of her hand,as he asked sure the curtness was evident in his voice - "ok, and since you have everything figured out, and you already have decided upon whats the best for both of us, why don't you help me a little out here??"

Zoya - "what do you mean??"

Asad - "how do you think you are going to go about erasing the marks we'v left in each others heart and soul,because i cant seem to find my way around that, and since you seem to have it all figured out...im sure you can help me..."

Zoya gaped at him in shock,and she felt speechless,what could she say?? What Could she say,when she knew that she could never erase him out of her mind, body or soul.But he was still looking at her for a answer and so she composed herself as she said - " I don't know, if I can help you Asad, I'm sure you will figure it out, on your own..."

Asad looked at her in the eye,sure the hurt was in his eye - "really?? will I Zoya??"

Zoya nodded - "yes, you will..."

Asad shook his head and he said - " you havent figured it out yet yourself Zoya, you know you could never erase me out of your system, so why dont you quit fooling yourself, and id like to see you try though, try as much as you can, and when you are done trying, call me and let me know and I promise only then will we talk...we will only talk if you want to talk...and i know you would want to, when you are done with this torture...."

Zoya started to get up, she did not like where this conversation was heading - " Asad, please....don't..."

Asad looked at her - "no, no, dont worry, im not going back to the same topic, i will not Zoya...im just stating a fact here, which you know is true...and as much as i know why you are doing this, i don't know how to feel when you are shutting the door on my face, when all i really want to do is be there for you...thats all...is that too much too ask for Zoya?? am i asking for too much?? am i expecting too much?? you are running away, fine...everything is over, fine...but now you don't want to even be in touch with me now?? like seriously?? this is what it has come down too??"

Zoya looked at him helpless as she said - "yes, you are asking for too much Asad, why don't you understand, i don't want you to be there for me, i don't want you...why cant you understand that the door to my heart is shut forever,and if a door doesn't open for you, it isn't meant for you...accept the fact...and make this easier for the both of us..."

Asad didnt know how his heart was withstanding these constant blows, but it did hold in strong and he looked at her as he said - " fine, if thats what you want, i promise you, you will not hear from me, but promise me that you will let me know when you figure out a way to erase those marks that we'v left on each other, off both love and pain..."

Zoya felt her insides shiver, but she nodded as she said softly- "fine, i will let you know...when iv figured it out..."

That was all he needed to see and hear, that broken soft voice,and those anguished eyes, and he knew for sure, that she would never be able to figure that out, just like him, they had both loved each other so intensely that it really was impossible to do so, in this Life.

The thought gave him some comfort,and he looked at Zoya, his anger now washing away, for she looked so vulnerable right now,as she sat on the bed looking lost,and he asked - "so this really is goodbye then Zoya???"

Zoya controlled her tears as she said, not looking at him - " i guess it is..",and she got up, from the bed and she picked up her crutch and she said softly - " ill be down, ammi,and khushi will be wondering where we are..."

Asad - "im sure they would guess,that we are probably saying our goodbye's because we wouldn't get a chance to be alone, when you actually leave..."

Zoya didn't say anything, and she started to walk ahead, and she felt him hold her hand,and she whispered - " Asad..."

Asad turned her around and he asked - "wont you at least let me hug you for one last time??"

One last time.Those words whipped her harsh.But she could only silently nod, and before she knew it she was pulled in for a crushing hug, and the minute she felt his arms go around her, she felt herself hug him back,and she did so tightly,because she knew she wouldn't be feeling these arms around her,probably ever again.She knew she was hurting Asad so much, and one fine day, he would finally give up,so this really was the only moment that she could feel him so close to her,and enjoy the feeling of his arms around her.And so she just hugged him closer.

Asad didnt know what he felt more,happiness or sadness, happiness because he had sensed that as she pulled him closer, that she was as torn apart as him, rest of the words that left her lips were only a lie,sadness because for now everything lay shattered apart,and Zoya was really going to leave,and he had no idea when he would see her next, and so he held her close,and he decided in that one moment that he was going to try to make this easier for her,and so he pulled back as he whispered - " i promise you, that i will take better care of myself while you are gone..."

Zoya smiled through her tears, she was sure he had seen them,it was very evident and she said - " thank you...that will help me feel better..."

Asad - "promise me that you will take care of yourself too, and give your health the first priority..."

Zoya nodded - " yeah..."

Asad looked at her, and he was sure he had tears in his eyes as he asked softly - "can i get another hug??"

Zoya immediately hugged him,as he supported her by holding onto her waist,this was that one moment in which time stood still,because she knew he knew this was really hard for her too,they both knew that even though this was tearing them apart within, it was something they had to face, nonetheless.

This was also that one moment in which, their broken hearts had just exchanged their silent goodbye's.

She pulled apart several minutes later, and she stepped out of his arms and she said softly - " im really hungry Asad..."

Asad nodded as he said - " sure, why dont you go down, tell ammi,ill be down in a few minutes..have a call to make..."

Zoya nodded,and she left the room.

Asad watched her leave,and he knew he couldn't let his anger misguide him this time around.Zoya loved him, no matter what words left her lips, she still loved him, and it was only a matter of time, until she came around to realising that this distance, this separation really wasn't a good idea.

Kkusum Maa was right, it always did take a while, for the flowers to bloom again.

Who was she kidding?? Did she for real think she could ever get around to getting him out of her system?? She could never, just like he couldn't because they had marked each others heart and soul, forever.If he just minus-ed that misunderstanding part, he did have a lot of wonderful memories of Zoya to keep him company for a long time, he would relive those, and he was sure, she would be doing the same, how could they ever forget those beautiful memories, of the Love that used to be, of their togetherness, even though she had et go of his hand for now, how could she let go of those marks he had left on her hands while holding them in his, on numerous occasions.

He had realised it already, and it was only a matter of time, she would do,and then everything would be fine.Maybe this time apart would make her see that, and he would use this time out to work on himself, get past the pain of guilt,so that he could go back to being the Asad, she fell in love with, and then he was sure, he would win her back.Yes, it really was sad though, there was nothing really more painful than true love gone wrong.And that was what had happened, they had hit a speedbreaker,and had taken a wrong turn, atlas Zoya had.

He was sure, he wouldn't let her astray too long,for he wasn't going to let her have her way for a long time, only until he had composed and found himself.

He took a deep breathe,and he made his way down to join everybody for breakfast.

Time was moving forward nonetheless,and so would he,because only if he moved forward, would he reach the point of meeting Zoya again.He was sure that intersection of their paths was destined to happen, sooner or later.

He smiled, he knew he had a lot of help and support to make it happen.

......................

Meanwhile -

Khushi ate a bite of her sandwhich,and she heard her ammi,say - " I just spoke to Kkusum, we should be there at Shantivan by 8 pm..."

Khushi smiled - " ofcourse ammi, i am free only...you see bhaijaan has me on house arrest for the last three days even though I'm fit and fine now...honestly never been better, but no, he wouldn't let me step out of the house,and honestly i couldn't thank Kkusum aunty enough, atlas ill get to step out, even if its a drive to Shantivan...",and she tried to sound casual as she finished that last bit,because of course her heart had been racing at the thought of finally being able to see Shantivan after all this while,it was his home after all.

Dilshaad smiled - " i understand Khushi, but this rest has done you good, see you are as healthy as before..."

Khushi grinned - "well thats because you and Zoya have been stuffing me with so much food, seriously, im sure iv gained 2 kgs by now..."

Dilshaad grinned as she said - "ok so while we wait for Asad and Zoya, let me make you some tea, in my style..."

Khushi nodded - " oh ammi, you are the best...",and she watched her get up.

It was a pity that her brother had her on house arrest, much to her disappointment, and thats why she hadn't been able to accompany Zoya on her visits home.She knew Arnav was probably very disappointed too, since they hadn't been able to get any alone time whatsoever in the last ten days, there was always someone around, either from his family, or her's,even in the hospital,even though Anjali di had tried to get them some time, it had been only possible to be alone for maximum ten minutes, and so they just had to use their texting,as a way of communication for now,and of course this house arrest condition wasn't helping much anyway,but she knew Arnav agreed with her brother on that.She smiled at the memory, he had been taking care off her as if she were his delicate darling,and she couldn't really complain though,she was enjoying his attention.

She saw her mother return and she sat down and gave her a cup and she smiled - "thank you ammi...",and she saw her cast a look up the stairs, and she sighed, as she asked softly - " worried about bhaijaan ammi??"

Dilshaad nodded - "ofcourse Khushi, and Zoya too, i am so worried for the two of them...its really heart wrenching to watch, i mean Kkusum understands,and she's been counselling Asad lately, you do know, he was always close to her...and i know its helping him, and im doing what i can too...but..."

Khushi sighed - "ammi, we are all doing what we can, in our own little ways...and i have faith, this is just a bend in the road for them, let Zoya have some time out, she will be better,she will come around, i know her way too well,she cannot go on without bhaijaan, forever...you see forever is a long long time ammi, and im sure she wouldn't want to spend it apart from the love of her life..."

Dilshaad nodded - "Im sure....",and then she looked at Khushi as she asked softly - "you are ok, aren't you??"

Khushi took a sip of her tea, she knew what her mother was implying, she was asking about the whole Arhaan episode and so she nodded - "ammi, I'm fine...its ok...its over...i cant believe though i was such a fool...that i knew him all along,and i couldn't see behind the mask..."

Dilshaad sighed - "dont blame yourself...you are very innocent khushi...and you like to see the best in people...thats all...and honestly thats what we love about you...dont let this change you, stay alert, but stay innocent...",and she held her daughters hand.

Khushi nodded - "ofcourse ammi...",and she looked up the stairs herself as she asked - "what do you think is happening up there??"

Dilshaad sighed - "probably saying their goodbye's, Khushi, they wont have any privacy later..."

Khushi nodded - "yeah, probably, and i know they are going to be so miserable...these goodbye's i tell you..."

Dilshaad nodded,and she heard khushi say - "oho, ammi, eat..."

Dilshaad started to eat,and right then Khushi felt her phone vibrate in her pocket and she quickly took it out, and kept it under the table,it was a message on whatsapp from Arnav.

Arnav : Where are you? you know my morning doesn't start until i have listened to your voice.I am sorry I missed you call, was with Mamaji.

She quickly typed : hey, goodmorning, its ok, and i am sorry, i missed your call too, i was in the shower,and i am just having breakfast, did you have your's?

She received a quick reply.

Arnav : Whats so good about the morning if I haven't even heard your voice yet? yes, i had breakfast, do you think Maa would let me get up from the table, if I hadn't? When are you calling me?

She smiled,as she read that,and she quickly typed : As soon as I am done with breakfast,bhaijaan and Zoya aren't here yet.I guess , probably saying their goodbye's.God Arnav, they are both so miserable.

Her phone beeped : I know, i am worried too, but we are all doing what we can,and thats what is there in our hands, right now, to be there for both Zoya and Asad in everyway we can.Everything will be fine, Khushi, all they need is time.

She immediately felt better reading that, this man was getting better with words,he just knew what to say and she typed : I know.i will call you soon.oh I see Zoya coming now.I need to see if she's ok,she does have a thoughtful expression on her face, which she just hid with a huge smile.Bravo - there she is at it again.

Khushi smiled at Zoya, as she saw her settle in the chair opposite her,and her phone beeped.

Arnav : I love you Khushi.

Zoya smiled at her as she gestured her to ask if this was her brother she was messaging? She nodded back at her, and she quickly typed : I love you too.

And she returned her attention to the table, keeping her phone back in her pocket as she heard her mother say - "Zoya, start eating, i am sure you are hungry...you didn't even have dinner properly.."

Zoya smiled - "oho ammi, thats because i had so much packing to do..."

Dilshaad reached across and touched Zoya's hand gently - "thank you for continuing to call me that..."

Zoya pressed her hand gently - " ammi, you do know i have a special equation with you of my own,the fact that i am no longer Asad's wife hasn't been able to change that...i will always call you that, because you are no less than maa to me",she finished with a small smile.

Dilshaad bent forward as she kissed her hand - " Ill miss you Zoya..."

Zoya smiled - " not more than me ammi...",and she threw a napkin at Khushi across playfully trying to lighten the mood as she said - "and this one too...ill miss her the most..."

Khushi smiled as she caught the napkin, of course she understood what Zoya was trying to do and she stuck out her tongue at her as she said - "well, i am going to visit you soon...you can fly across the world Zoya, but im coming after you..."

Zoya laughed,Khushi always made her laugh.

Right then she spotted Asad join them at the table and she heard Dilshaad say - " please tell me that you aren't skipping breakfast today for real??"

Asad gave his mother a small smile - "no ammi, i am not skipping the most important meal of the day...i know it worries you, and its time I stopped causing you worry...",and as he finished that last bit, his eyes locked with Zoya's,and he was sure she understood that what he had just said,was also to ease her worry.

Zoya looked at Dilshaad as she spoke - " ammi, ill be leaving for home a little early like at 6 maybe..."

Dilshaad nodded - "ofcourse, you must, and we will join you at 8..."

Zoya looked at Asad as she asked - " and i know Khushi's house arrest is over now...so she is coming with me, if thats ok?? I mean she has never been home, and id like to show her around myself, before i leave, i wouldn't get any time later..."

Khushi smiled - " am i?? bhaijaan??? please????"

Asad nodded and he smiled at his sister - "yes, its ok...khushi your house arrest is over..."

Khushi rolled her eyes playfully as she said - " oh thank god, or i thought i was going to be caged within the walls of Barkat forever..."

Asad rolled his eyes as he looked at his mother and Zoya,and he smiled fondly - " she's officially back to her crazy self, or actually even more crazier, its safe to now say that Khushi has fully recovered..."

Zoya winked at Khushi - "ofcourse...infact im sure she's never been better..."

Khushi winked back - " you bet..."

Dilshaad grinned - "oho, now cmon eat...Zoya...Asad...",and she watched them eat.

Khushi said something, and Asad and Zoya laughed,and Dilshaad took that one moment to freeze this particular moment of happiness in her head, she had no idea, when would she see the three of them laugh together again.It really was going to be very hard to bid goodbye to Zoya.

15 Minutes Later

Asad stepped out and he looked back once to see Zoya, Khushi and his mother laugh, and it was as if his eyes clicked that moment to frame in his head.It was a happy moment, a very light moment, a moment of genuine affection and love, and he knew that the fact that he and Zoya weren't together anymore did not affect Zoya's bond with his mother or sister, because she had a equation with both of them, a very special equation of her own,and honestly he was glad, for he knew he would always have sources to know how Zoya was doing, even if she wasn't going to be directly in touch with him.

He shrugged the pain aside and he got in behind his wheel,and started to drive.

Ten Minutes Later

The door bell rang, and Dilshaad looked at Ruksaar as she said, getting up from the dining table- " Ruksaar, will you please see who it is..."

Ruksaar nodded - "yes khala..."

Zoya looked at Khushi,and she got up, joining Dilshaad in the living room - "I wonder who is it...?"

Khushi walked upfront, and right then she saw a couple of aunty's enter, she recognised them, of course from her engagement party, and she knew what this was about, infact she knew this was coming up.

She saw her mother sigh as she walked up to greet them and Zoya looked at Khushi as she whispered - " Khushi, please go up to your room, me and ammi,will handle this..."

Khushi took a deep breathe as she looked at Zoya - " no, i will not leave, i got this...and I'm sure its just not going to be all about me...anyway..."

Zoya took a deep breathe as she nodded in agreement - 'yeah..i know..all of a sudden everyone is so interested in all our lives..."

Dilshaad looked at Khushi and Zoya and she said - "Zoya, Khushi..this is Farida, Shaheen, Heena,and this is Shaheen's daughter Zaira...they were there for your engagement...."

Khushi and Zoya smiled,and greeted everyone and Zoya smiled - " ofcourse, i remember very well, ammi, ill just ask Ruksaar to prepare tea for everyone..."

Dilshaad gave her a small smile,and she walked out,and she heard Farida aunty say - " Dilshaad, we are so sorry, we heard about Zoya's accident...and then even Khushi beta's engagement broke..so much has happened, in so little time..."

Zoya sighed, ofcourse, what would the society do if it didn't get its share of gossip,but she knew it really couldn't be helped, no matter what you do, people are going to find a reason to talk.

She quickly instructed Ruksaar to get tea and some snacks out, and she made her way out, but she quickly took out a moment to text her brother, she was sure he would like to know about the grilling session Khushi was going to be facing now.

...............................

30 Minutes Later

Zaira looked at Khushi as she said, giving her a small smile - " Its unfortunate Khushi, i mean Arhaan was a nice guy, i did have a word with him on your engagement, and we connected over the love for cricket...im really sorry, that things didn't work out..."

Shaheen looked at her daughter ,and then she looked at Khushi - " I'm sure if you would have kept more patience beta...",and then she looked at Dilshaad - "kids these days, they don't have any patiece for relationships, always so quick to end things, a small hurdle and they dont want to work through it...theres really no value for relationships anymore..."

Khushi took a deep breathe as she gave a small smile and said - "maybe i could have aunty, but no me and Arhaan had hit a dead end, we thought getting engaged would make things better,as in mark a new beginning, but we realised that we were just fooling ourselves, so the sooner we ended it, the better it is , for both of us...".Ofcourse, no one in the society knew about the anguished secret,so she had to play along.

Heena looked at Dilshaad and she said - "yes ofcourse, we understand beta, Dilshaad you been strong for your children, good that you have been supportive..."

Farida - "yes, good...",and she turned to khushi as she asked - " so you were in an accident with Zoya, when you were on your way back from the airport, after Arhaan left..."

Khushi nodded - "yes aunty..."

Farida - "does he know?? that you were in the accident??"

Zoya looked at her irritated - "Arhaan??"

Farida - "yes...does he know??"

Khushi touched Zoya's hands calmly - "aunty, i don't know if he knows...and like i said, me and Arhaan have decided to never speak again...its for the best..."

Farida nodded,and she touched Khushi's hand as she said - " I'm sorry, i don't mean to spy, or something, its just that you seemed so happy at the party..its really sad...that this had to happen..."

Khushi nodded in silence.

Zoya looked at them and she heard Zaira, say - "so Zoya...im sure you started with physiotherapy..theres this amazing doctor i know off..."

Khushi immediately jumped in as she explained - " Zoya is leaving for her treatment at a center in Switzerland...you see we all only want the best for her..."

Farida looked at Dilshaad - "and you and Asad are ok with this?? sending your daughter in law so far all by herself...??"

Thats it.Dilshaad had, had enough.

She looked at Khushi and Zoya to keep silent as she spoke curtly - " farida, like iv told you before, i believe in standing with my children rather than against them, we have raised our children in a way that they are strong and wise enough to take their own decisions, and its us who have given them this upbrining, then if we dont support them when they probably need it the most, then whats the point of calling ourselves parents..."

Shaheen immediately interrupted as she said - "Dilshaad, relax...we understand, after all you know whats the best for your family...we were just concerned thats all...thats why we came by to see for ourselves that Khushi and Zoya are in good health...thats all...and i guess its time to leave...please excuse us if we offended you in anyway..."

Dilshaad gave her a small smile, Shaheen was the only genuine one out of the lot,and she nodded - " its alright...Shaheen..."

Shaheen got up, giving Dilshaad a apologetic look - "i guess its time to leave..cmon...",and everyone got up,and Shaheen saw Farida and heena nod briefly at Dilshaad giving a curt smile as they made their way out,and Shaheen walked up and hugged Dilshaad as she said - "im sorry for them, i was coming all by myself, but they wouldn't budge..you know how they are..."

Dilshaad hugged Shaheen - " its ok...i understand...".She knew Shaheen from her college days, and Farida and Heena were her acquaintances because of Shaheen.

Shaheen smiled - " give my regards to Kkusum, maybe we can catch up one day..."

Dilshaad smiled - "ofcourse, im sure Kkusum would love to catch up.."

Zaira smiled as she nodded at Khushi and Zoya and walked out with her mother.

Dilshaad let out a sigh of relief as she sat on the sofa - " thank god, i had the patience to not slap Farida and Heena...their constant irritating questions...god...."

Zoya sat next to her as she said - " its ok na ammi, happens,Shaheen aunty is the only genuine one, i always tell you..."

Dilshaad nodded - "i know...",and she looked at Khushi who sat deep in thought and she nudged Zoya and Zoya immediately said - "how about, if we go for a early lunch and a movie this afternoon, Khushi what say?? it'll be like our thing before i leave, and let me see if Anjali di and maa can join us too...cmon it'll be fun..."

Khushi gave Zoya a small smile as she nodded - "yes, I'm good..."

Zoya grinned - "ok then, ill just talk to di and Maa,and get our tickets done..ammi,cmon don't you want to get ready??"

Dilshaad smiled as she kissed Zoya's forehead and she whispered in her ear - " how am i going to let you go...?"

Zoya hugged her immediately ,and she enjoyed the comfort of her embrace,and she said, pulling back - "oh cmon now ammi, im sure, you dont want me to cry now..."

Dilshaad wiped her tears as she nodded,and made her way to her room to get ready.

Zoya walked up to Khushi,and she sat next to her holding her hand - " you ok??"

Khushi gave her a small reassuring smile - " yes, i am..."

Zoya looked at her as she said - " why don't you talk to bhai?? you will feel better..."

Khushi - "yeah...i was just thinking of calling him.."

Zoya smiled - "good, I'm sure he's been calling you anyway, did you check your phone?? i messaged him when the aunty's arrived.."

Khushi - " Zoya...seriously he's going to be worried...and no my phone is on the table i guess..i haven't seen it ever since they arrived..."

Zoya smiled - "what?? i have strict instructions to inform him about everything related to you..and i cannot break the Raizada Sibling Code of Conduct..."

Khushi laughed as she hugged Zoya - "you are insane...im gonna miss you so much..."

Zoya hugged Khushi,and she held on to her for sometime as she whispered - "i know...me too..."

......................

AR - NOON

Arnav looked at his phone for the millionth time, to see if Khushi had messaged or called.

He had missed Khushi's call anyway, this morning, and then she had missed his, and then she had said that she would call soon after breakfast, but she hadnt, and he had waited only thinking that probably she would still be with everyone,and then he had two meetings lined up,so he had gotten busy himself,and he was glad, for he could use the distraction.

It had been three days since Khushi was discharged from the hospital and he also hadn't seen her for the last three days, because Asad had her on house arrest,as he wanted her to rest it out more,and although he wanted that for Khushi too, he had missed seeing her.The one week before she was at the hospital, he would of course see her everyday, but they hadn't been able to get any alone time together,his sister had helped him as usual, but he could only get upto like 5-10 minutes with her, since someone or the other was always around in the hospital,and then once Khushi was back home, Zoya was anyway coming to visit Shantivan everyday,and Asad would come to pick her up later on, so he had no excuse to go to Barkat,and see khushi, without raising any suspicion, because of course khushi and him had decided to be as discreet as they could be, for now.And so the only method of communication for the last few days had been through texts and calls.

And he was feeling a little edgy himself, because Zoya was leaving tonight,and he was almost releived when his mother announced two days ago, that she was holding family dinner for everyone before Zoya left,because he would get to see Khushi finally,he needed to see her to calm his edgy nerves, although he was trying his best to not seem edgy to the rest of his family, but he was very worried for both Asad and Zoya.

He had returned from the boardroom 30 minutes ago, and spotted Zoya's message on his phone,which he had left behind on his desk,his mind had gone into a worry mode again, because he could only sense the turmoil Khushi must be going through having to answer endless questions about Arhaan the murderer, and when and why her engagement broke.He hated the fact that he wasn't there to shield her from it all.He wanted to do that, he wanted to protect her, he wanted to be there with her , hold her hand and let the world know, that if they had to approach Khushi, they would have to face him first.

But then this pact of being discreet.This time around,he wanted to go with Khushi's pace.

He picked up his phone and re read Zoya's message which read : Bhai, ammi's friends just arrived,and i can clearly forsee,the next 30 minutes, they are going to be questioning Khushi,in order to understand what really happened.I am in the kitchen,asking Ruksaar to prepare tea,and honestly its those aunty's i hate the most, Farida and heena, shaheen aunty is genuine, come to think of it, should i ask Ruksaar to add some salt instead of sugar in there tea,or some red chilli,aha they will run for their lives..oh no, but i can't ammi,will have to listen so much,anyway i guess the interogation just began, I gotta go now.Call Khushi if you are free, and ill try to get her to pick up,faking in front of everyone how its so important for her to take this call,and ahaa we can help her escape the situation...ok bye now.

And he had called Khushi, three times,but she didn't pick up, so he had just been waiting since then, to hear from her.

Even in the worry, he felt a smile curve up his lips, Zoya, his little Zoya, trust her to be mischevious,and to think if he had seen this message on time, he would have actually asked her to add red chilli in these aunty's tea.But the smile vanished off his face, as reality came back, Zoya was in so much pain, and she was trying to be normal, sound normal be normal, but he knew her way too well, it was just a mask,to cover up that heartbreaking pain.

Just like Asad.

He quickly picked up his phone as he texted Asad : Be there on time tonight, maa would hate it if you are late.Shes been so worried about you.I told her that you are dealing with it,and are ok.You are ok right?

His phone beeped quickly.

Asad : Yes, i am.No other option really?and yes, i will be there on time.Zoya will be there early though, with khushi,she wants to show khushi around her home, before she leaves.Ill come with ammi,later.See You.

Arnav felt his heart jump in happiness as he read that.Khushi was going to be in his home, earlier than expected. He refrained from asking Asad the time, because that would probably give him away, so he just wrote : Ok, great.See You.

And right then his phone rang, and the minute he saw Khushi's name flashing on the screen he picked up instantly and he heard her say - "Arnav, thank god you picked up, i so needed to hear your voice.."

Arnav - " hiiii....me too...Zoya messaged me..you ok right??"

Khushi - "yes, I'm fine...honestly i knew it was coming up...and it wasn't just me alone who was being grilled, they had a zillion questions for Zoya too, Farida aunty couldn't believe that bhaijaan and ammi,are ok with sending Zoya to Switzerland, all by herself...but Ammi gently gave her a piece of her mind,and you should have seen farida and heena aunty's faces...anyway, im just glad that no one knows about the annulment yet, i can only imagine..."

Arnav sighed - "ofcourse,we have to do everything to keep that bit under cover..."

Khushi - " i know you are worried, I understand...you were just thinking about Zoya leaving tonight right?"

Arnav - "how do you know??"

He could almost hear her smile as she said - " well, i know you Arnav, i can sense it..and its ok to be worried, i am too, but lets not let this worry get in our way of supporting them right?? you'v been telling me that constantly, they need our support right now and if we are going to be worried and anxious, then theres no way we are going to be off any help to them..."

Arnav smiled,she instantly knew how to calm his nerves,and he said - " then I'm sure you can clearly sense how much iv been missing you...i cant believe i haven't seen you in three days..."

Khushi - "well thats changing tonight..and i want you to know.."

Arnav interruped - "i know that you will be coming early with Zoya.."

Khushi - "how?? what now do you have some spy camera installed in barkat?"

Arnav laughed,but he said - "very funny Khushi, i have my sources, Asad told me..."

Khushi teased - "oh yes, how can i forget the bromance is on..so what now, do you and bhaijaan chat all day long??"

Arnav grinned - "well not all day long, but we do keep each other informed off all the important things, anyway will you please tell me by what time will you be there??"

Khushi teased - "why?? will you be there at home?? i know you have meetings until 7 today, you mentioned last night...so whats the point..."

Arnav - " i plan to cancel Khushi, i do wish to be at home when you come, for you will be coming for the first time, and iv been waiting to see you under my roof,and show you around,for what seems like forever now..."

Khushi - " okk...so you gotta stop using that intense hoarse voice with me...it gives me shivers..."

Arnav laughed - "really??"

Khushi - "yeah...anyway we are doing a early lunch and movie ,we as in me, Zoya, ammi,kkusum aunty and anjali di, should be there at Shantivan by 530,the movie finishes at 5..ok now i gotta go..i hear ammi,calling me...ill see you then..."

Arnav smiled to himself - "yeah..see you...",and he hung up as he saw Aman enter his cabin and he said - "Aman, cancel all my meetings for the day after 5, i will be leaving early today..."

Aman nodded - "yes sir...also iv just finished my call with Noor from Mr.Khan's office...she did say the merger papers are almost ready..."

Arnav nodded - "good...",and he looked at Aman who stood with a smile on his face, and he asked - "what????"

Aman smiled - "just wondering about how the stock markets are going to react to this volatile news of Khan and Raizada industries merging back as one business group...its good that you and Mr Asad have decided to have it back as it was before...",he finished, with a huge grin, knowing that whatever the issue of rivalry had existed, had now been sorted,there was no point in digging in to know what really was the matter,although he knew, the society would always have this mystery on their minds.But the bosses knew what they were doing, and that was the only thing that mattered.

Arnav gave him a small smile, Aman was a trusted associate and for the first time he opened up a little as he said walking upto the study in his cabin and look at the mantle of awards on it, and then at a picture of his father and uncle hugging that he had placed here just 5 days ago,and he said - "im sure dad and uncle would have wanted it this way, after all this was how it all began..they were in this togethe...its only fair that me and Asad honour what they had started..."

Aman nodded - " Its a good move, Sir, I'm sure both your mother's and Asad Sir's mother would be very happy about it.."

Arnav smiled - "ofcourse...but they don't know yet, we plan to tell them over dinner tonight..."

Aman - "before Zoya ma'am leaves..."

Arnav nodded - "yes, on that note, have you checked everything, the accomodation and everything, the medical formalities, i dont want Zoya to face any issues..."

Aman nodded - "yes sir, definitely, i have taken care of everything,and also briefed Zoya ma'am about it...shell be fine...",and he turned to leave.

Arnav said with a smile - "Aman, i dont think iv ever said it before, but id like to thank you both for your efficiency and loyalty..."

Aman grinned,he had never felt happier in this workplace and he said - "you'r welcome Sir...anytime..."

Arnav smiled - "be in constant touch with Noor, see that all the documents for the merger are in place...i want this to go smoothly..."

Aman nodded - "It will Sir..",and he walked out,smiling, he was trusted with such a great responsibility, it was his duty to make sure, that nothing went wrong.

..........................

Shantivan - 730 PM

Arnav walked into his room, hoping that Zoya would finally have a way of getting Khushi up,and away from everyone for atlas a few minutes. Hecouldn't believe it, it had been 90 minutes, since Khushi had stepped into Shantivan,and nothing had gone according to his plan,for he hadn't even got 5 minutes alone with her,because after their movie, everyone had come back home together, even Dilshaad aunty.

And ofcourse, how could he even expect to get five minutes out amongst all this re-union happening in between their families,and of course since Zoya was leaving too, everyone was just well together.And Zoya had instantly started showing Khushi around, and he had smiled as Khushi had recalled a few of her childhood memories off here.

He smiled though,as he recalled his eyes locking with Khushi,as she stepped inside Shantivan for the first time,and the minute she had, the famous Raizada tea time had begun.The attendance was full on - His mother,Anjali di, jiju, nani, mama, mamiji, akash , payal,dilshaad aunty and khushi.He had been an active participant ofcourse,because he was getting to look at Khushi, and he had tried not to stare shamelessly,and he knew Anjali di, Zoya and Akash were having a good time, enjoying his misery because ofcourse, they knew his secret.

But How could he ever take that happy sight out of his head?? The laughter, the ease, the happiness, that echoed through the walls of his home, that was once caged in silence and pain of the past.But right now, in this very moment, he realised the true meaning of what his father used to tell him, that the only thing constant about time, was that it changes.

It really was about ups and downs.It really was as if Life would first throw you off a plane and let you fall for a while, and then hand you the parachute itself, to bring you back safely on the ground,and all this while,all that was needed was faith.You had to have faith,that the parachute would open sooner or later.And that was exactly what was happening with Zoya and Asad right now, too.He just hoped it wouldn't take very long for their parachutes to open.

He took a deep breathe and right then he turned around,as he heard footsteps,and he smiled as he saw Zoya at his door, grinning at him as she said, pushing Khushi inside - "bhai, iv got khushi up on the pretext of showing her something in my room, i will be in my room, you have i guess 7 minutes, before anyone calls out to us...",and she winked at him and Khushi and shut the door to his room.

Khushi's eyes locked with Arnav's,and he walked upto her, and he held her hand, and he instantly pulled her close into him and held her by the waist and she whispered softly - "Im sorry...its just that with everyone around...it just was impossible to get away..."

He immediately pulled her closer,and her hands on reflex came to rest on his chest and he smiled - " its alright Khushi, as much as i am disappointed that things havent gone my way, im happy too...for i loved seeing you bond with everyone with so much ease, and honestly i cant believe im really seeing you, under my roof,for real..."

Khushi's wrapped her hands around his neck as she said - "oh really??then why didn't you let Zoya show me your room when she was showing me around?? why did you have to shut the door, and pretend to be on some important work call, when I'm very much sure your mind was on anything but work..."

Arnav smiled,as he held her hand,with one of his hands, and closed her eyes with the other and guided her out of his room, into his poolside,and she just matched his steps silently and he whispered into her from behind - "well thats because, i wanted to show you around my zone, myself...and especially this...when its just you and me...",and he quickly picked up his hand from her eyes,to reveal to her his personal serene place.

Khushi smiled as she looked around, it was amazing, and she whispered looking back at him - "your poolside...i remember you talking about this,back in london..."

Arnav smiled,as he hugged her from behind and she leaned back into him - "its beautiful Arnav...im sure you sit out here often...",and then she turned to look at him.

Arnav smiled - "only all the time...",and he held her hand,and laced his fingers through her's,as he whispered, kissing her hand - "god, iv missed you so much..."

Khushi felt a similar shiver go through her as she felt his lips on her hand - "i know, me too...",and he stepped closer into her, and although she didn't want to,she still stepped back for old times sakes, this was their thing in the past, he would step forward and she would step back in time,and she grinned as she looked into him and she said - "just so you know, im only stepping back, for old times sake...remember...how..."

Arnav smiled as he stepped forward,and she stepped back again and he said, recalling a memory - "how you would aways do this...until...",and soon Khushi had hit the wall,and he caged her in between his arms and he said looking into her eyes - "until you would hit a wall, and i would cage you in my arms, just like this..."

Khushi nodded as she felt herself shiver under his intense gaze - " exactly, just like this..."

Arnav cupped her face with both his hands,and he felt her shiver and he said with a naughty smirk - "seriously Khushi, you are shivering, it isn't the first time, we are this close..."

Khushi looked into his eyes right then,and she spoke, sure the emotion in her voice - "yes,surely, but it is the first time without any baggage of the past, no more lies, no more secrets....no more uncertainity, no more pain...only love...i think my shivering is justified...and i told you before, don't use this intense voice of yours, it gives me shivers..."

Arnav felt moved, of course if you see it from that point, it really was the first time,and he whispered leaning into her - " you are right, there is now place for only love, in between of us,and you see Khushi, id like to see you shiver in my arms..."

Khushi didn't close her eyes because she was hypnotised by his intense gaze,and she continued looking into his, as she asked,as she saw him leaning in closer to her lips,she was sure she was trembling - "are you going to kiss me now??"

Arnav gazed at her face,she was blushing,and she was trembling and he was loving it and he whispered , his lips almost on hers,but he was sure she could feel him breathe on her - "yes Khushi..."

Khushi shivered,as she whispered back in anticipation - "good, coz id like that....",and just as his lips were about to seal her's,his stupid phone rang spoiling the moment.

Arnav cursed under his breathe - "dammit...",Khushi laughed.

Khushi controlled her giggle,and she said - "go on,its only fair this has happened before",and Arnav smiled as he took out his phone from the pocket and Khushi asked - "who is it??"

Arnav saw Asad's name flashing on the screen,and he flashed his phone in front of Khushi,and she smiled - "bhaijaan...god Arnav, you will not believe this... back in London, remember the first time we were actually about to kiss and my phone rang and disrupted our moment and then i ran away after??"

Arnav ignored the rings on his phone as he nodded,recalling the memory - "yes, ofcourse, and i was so pissed off..."

Khushi grinned - "well now i can safely tell you, it was because it was bhaijaan who had called, and that time it was just like reality flashing in my face..."

Arnav smiled as he now understood and he kept a hand back on one side of the wall - "reality that you were about to kiss the man your brother hated...and it made you run..."

Khushi smiled as she said - "because i felt it would just complicate everything further..",and her eyes locked with Arnav's as he whispered - "but looks like we couldn't really escape the complication...you know why??"

Khushi's eyes twinkled in happiness as she asked - "why??"

Arnav ignored the bells on his phone as he said- " because even back then, i was so madly in love with you, i was just so stupid to not see it..."

His phone continued to ring and Khushi said - "oho...pick it up now..."

Arnav nodded as he picked up,and he heard Asad tell him that he was reaching in five minutes,and he then hung up quickly.

Khushi - "bhaijaan's here??"

Arnav - "not yet, he will be in five minutes..."

Khushi - "cmon lets go then...."

Arnav nodded,and he saw Khushi walk ahead, and she turned back quickly as she kissed him on the cheek as she said - "iv always been so madly in love with you too...",and before he could say anything, she had sprinted to his door,and opened it, and Zoya was right there, looked like she was just about to come in.Khushi looked back at him and smiled, and Zoya gave him a cheeky grin and he stood there for a while in his spot grinning in happiness,and then he composed his face, and made his way down, he knew he couldn't be grinning like an idiot in front of everyone, his mother, Dilshaad aunty and Asad were really good at reading him.

...............................

11.00 PM - Shantivan

Zoya looked around, at the happy faces of everyone on the table,as they finished dessert and she excused herself to go to the washroom,and it was also because she had to let out those tears that had been brimming up,because as the time was nearing to say goodbye, she really was having that nauseous feeling in her stomach, it really was going to be difficult to be on her own, without all these people who loved her so much.

Asad spotted Zoya excuse herself,and he excused himself,and he picked up a paper napkin from the table, he knew she would probably be crying in the washroom,and so he walked a little ahead, out side the powder room of the lobby,and waited outside,with a heavy heart.He had never felt so light and yet so heavy at the same time.Light, because everything with the Raizada's had become so smooth, their bond was becoming stronger than even before, and heavy because there was this one Raizada who was taking his heart along with her.

A Few Minutes Later

Asad saw Zoya step out, and just as she shut the door, he held out his hand in front of her, that held the napkin and he said - "you can never hide you tears from me Zoya..."

Zoya looked at him in suprise, and she took the napkin from his hand,and she wiped the tear from the corner of her eye,as she said softly - " thanks..."

Asad watched her walk a little ahead,and he was about to follow,an he saw her step a little back,as she leaned back into the wall,and to his shock, the calm and composed look on her face was gone,as she closed her eyes,and tears started to fall,and her shoulders started to shake,as she wept,and he on impulse pulled her in his arms for a hug,and she held onto him, she didn't let go, and she continued to sob in his arms,and he just held onto her, brushing her hair softly, what could he say?? He didn't have any words,even if he had any, he was sure, he couldn't say it loud, because of the emotion that was stirring in side of him.He could clearly see that this was very hard for Zoya, then why did she have to be so stubborn about leaving, why couldn't she just stay back here, and let them all support her through her healing.

Zoya felt the comfort of his arms soothe her, and she immediately in that one moment did rethink her decision, her heart did throw this idea in her mind, it seemed very wise to just surrender in Asad's arms, and stay back here with her family, with Asad,but she couldn't, she couldn't only because she loved these people so so much, she didn't want Asad or any of them to see her being insecure, and miserable in this challenging phase, she always wanted them to have a happy picture of her in their minds, not the picture of a insecure, anxious and a miserable Zoya,and so she controlled her self,as she pulled back and she wiped her tears as she said looking at Asad - " thank you Asad...its just very overwhelming, too many goodbye's, thats all..."

Asad nodded,as he saw her wipe her tears and she said through them - " ill just wash my face and join you two minutes...give me two minutes, these waterworks will take a few more seconds to stop...ill just be back..."

Asad looked at her as he said, sure the emotion was in his voice - "don't go...please...don't go...Zoya..please..."but he knew this was in vain, as he saw her step back into the washroom,as she looked away breaking the eye lock.

He took a deep breathe as he walked back to join everyone, and on the way he spotted Arnav,and he heard him say - "where were you??cmon i want you to be the one to tell everyone about the merger...its about time"

Asad looked at Arnav,and he gave him a small smile - "me?? why?? lets do it together..."

Arnav nodded - "ok fine, you start first, ill join you in...wheres Zoya??"

Asad sighed - " in the bathroom, crying her eyes out...its so frustrating to see her being so stubborn..."

Arnav nodded - " I know, its going to be hard to say goodbye..."

Asad nodded - "always is the hardest bit...but you are lucky, atlas you are her family, her brother, she isn't going to cut you out, like she's going to cut me out.."

Arnav kept a hand on his friends shoulder as he said - " only a matter of time until she realised that you are her family too...have faith..."

Asad nodded - "and how can i ever thank you enough Arnav for being so supportive..."

Arnav smiled - "well, you dont need too...now cmon...cheer up, im sure it'll be easier for Zoya , if you bid her goodbye with a smile on your face, we all plan to do that..."

Asad nodded,and he walked ahead with his friend.

.........

Fifteen Minutes Later

Asad looked at everyone, who were looking at him with anticipation,as Arnav had just announced that Asad had a big announcement to make.

He saw his mother and khushi give him inquisitive looks,and he saw Zoya and anjali di look at Arnav, who just smiled at him and gestured him to go ahead.

Asad took a deep breathe as he said - " well, theres something that both me and Arnav would like you all to know, but i don't know why Arnav would have me say it...when it was our collective idea...ofcourse we all have gone through so much because of the anguished misunderstanding of the past, but like Kkusum maa said, looking back is only going to get us pain, so its better to move forward, and what better way to move forward, than to taking it back to the point, from it all really began...abbu,and uncle,started this business empire together, it only is right, that me and Arnav honour what they started...as a gesture to embark on to a new beginning...",and he looked at Arnav as he gestured him to continue.

Arnav nodded as he looked at the confused faces of everyone, and he caught Khushi looking at him ,as she asked him through the eyes what really was up here, and he smiled at everyone as he spoke - "Asad and me have decided to merge back Khan and Raizada Industries back together, into one business group, just like it was before, I am sure dad and uncle would have wanted it this way...."

And just as those words left his mouth, there was a stunned silence,but he could see the happiness on everyones faces,they were stunned but in a happy way,and Arnav gestured Asad to continue,and Asad spoke - "well, we are getting the paperwork ready, in probably a weeks time from now, we will sign them ,and all our businesses will be merged into as One.However, Arnav will oversee our Design and Fashion Line along with other Financial and Trading Companies,since thats his area of expertise and i will look after our construction and real estate line and telecommunication companies..."

Arnav - "since Asad has his expertise in that, but on the whole, we will both we working together as one, to take what dad and uncle built to newer heights, and I'm sure...we can do so even better, together...."

And just as he had finished, he saw Dilshaad aunty get up as she immediately pulled Arnav into a hug, as she whispered through her happy tears - " thank you thank you so so much..." and Kkusum pulled Asad into a crushing hug as she said - " thank you so much,im sure Alok and Rashid are very happy today, wherever they are, I'm sure they are watching over us, and grinning with joy, probably toasting each other a single malt..."

Everyone broke into a laughter, and Arnav saw Khushi wipe her tears as their eyes locked, and he understood that she had just silently thanked him.

Zoya looked at Asad, and she walked upto him as she whispered - " thank you so much Asad...this means a lot...to everyone..."

Asad looked at her as he asked - "and to you?? does this make you happy??"

Zoya gave him a small smile as she said - "ofcourse, it means a lot to me, im very happy...."

Asad smiled, and he was pulled into a hug by Akash, and then all he could see was everyone hugging each other, in happiness.

And right then he saw Kkusum maa and arnav and anjali di pull Zoya in for a tight group hug, and he looked at his watch, and he realised that it was now time, for Zoya to leave.

He saw Zoya hug everyone, one by one.

She hugged Mamaji, mamiji,Nani, payal,Akash, her jiju, and then she said looking at everyone - " no one will cry, cmon please...."

Anjali nodded as she pulled in Zoya for another hug - "fine, but you will take care ok....please....and be strong...we are only letting you do this because we know its so important to you..."

Zoya nodded,as she walked over and then hugged her brother and Arnav held her close as he whispered - " ill miss you Zoya..."

Zoya nodded - "ill miss you too bhai...so so so much..."

And then Zoya hugged Dilshaad and Kkusum and just as she was about to hug Khushi, Khushi said - " no way, no goodbye for me yet, I'm coming to the airport to see you off..."

Zoya looked at Khushi as she hugged her nonetheless - " no Khushi, you should be back home now, resting..."

Khushi kissed her forehead - " i will after i see you off..."

Anjali spoke as she saw Zoya stepping out the door - " Khushi, Asad and Chotte,will see you off Zoya...now be reasonable, we cant listen to your every whim and fancy of wanting to go to the airport alone..."

Zoya smiled at her family as she waved bye,and hugged her mother and ammi,and her sister once again,as she saw her brother and Asad settle in her luggage in the car, and Arnav took the driving seat, and Asad sat in the front, and Khushi helped her getting in with her crutch and then she got it herself,and her brother started to drive.

........................

50 Minutes Later

Asad cursed the traffic of Delhi, where was it when you most needed it?? He had hoped the ride to the airport would last longer by atlas ten minutes more, but no all the cars had just vanished somewhere into thin air probably,and they had reached ten minutes before.

He saw Khushi gesture him to smile,and he did smile, only for Zoya's sake even though everything inside him was breaking, and he looked standing next to Khushi as Arnav paid the porter to accompany Zoya with her luggage in,and right then a airline executive came by and he looked at Zoya as he asked - "maam, we could get you a wheelchair for assistance..."

He saw Zoya flinch, but she adjusted her crutch under her left arm,as she gave him a smile - " no thank you, I'm fine..."

Asad and Arnav glared at the airline executive,as he made his way back towards the gates, and Khushi pulled Zoya in a hug,as she kissed her forehead - "call me as you land, call me as you reach Interlaken,and as you are your cottage..."

Zoya hugged khushi as she said - "ofcourse, i will...Khushi..."and she pulled back to see tears in Khushi's eyes and she said - "cmon, you promised, no tears please...."

Khushi nodded as she hugged her again,and she saw Zoya hug Arnav again.

Arnav kissed her on the head as he asked - " passport?"

Zoya - "yes bhai.."

Arnav - "your tickets?? all your medical files?? the dollars??"

Zoya gave him a small smile - " yes bhai, i have everything that i need..."

Arnav turned to look at Asad, and he walked upto him as he said - "ill wait with Khushi at the back, in the car..."

Asad nodded,and he watched Khushi give him a reassuring smile as she followed his friend silently.

Asad walked towards Zoya,and she looked at him,and he could have frozen the time then and there if he could.

He looked at Zoya as their eyes locked - " so this is it then?? you really are leaving for real..."

Zoya took a deep breathe as she fought her emotions - " yeahh Asad..this is it..."

Asad on reflex caught hold of her hand as he asked - " you will think of me at least?? or you wont even remember me??"

Zoya gupled down tears as she held on to his hand and clutched his hand softly and she bent forward and kissed his cheek softly - " of course...",and she choked on the emotion as she whispered - " try to smile while you think of me please, for i know i will smile when i think of you..."

Asad held on to her hand, too afraid too let go,because he knew that once she walked into that terminal, he wouldn't be seeing her for a long time,and he had to say it, he had to say it out loud, or it would suffocate him ,and so he said looking into her eyes - " I love you...always have, always will...Zoya..."

Zoya felt her insides freeze.She hadn't expected to hear those words,and it took everything off her to not say those words back,she didn't want to give him false hopes,and so she just whispered - " take good care of yourself Asad, please...",and then she slowly took out her hand out from his, and turned around,and walked in towards the terminal,ready to board the flight that would take her far away.

Asad stood frozen as he watched Zoya enter the gates, and he stood until he could see her fade into the crowd,and it was only then he made his way back,and got into the car, as realisation struck him that Zoya indeed had left,and just as he got into the front seat he felt Khushi's hand on his shoulder from behind as she said - "bhaijaan..."

He held her hand on her shoulder as he whispered - "Im fine...",and he looked at his friend as he said - " I will always love her...no matter what..."

Arnav nodded and he asked - "did you tell her that??"

Asad nodded - " yes i did...and im glad i did..."

Arnav nodded at Asad,as he said - " good that you did tell her, I'm sure your words will haunt her for a long long time..."and he started to drive, and he knew it really was good that Asad had told Zoya that, because she was his sister, he knew her way too well, he was sure Asad's words would haunt her in her sleep,just like Khushi's love confession had haunted him for a long long time, when he had broken everything apart and come back to India, all those months ago,and right then he looked in the review mirror,and his eyes locked with khushi's,and she gave him a small smile,as if she understood what he had meant to imply to Asad,and that she had understood what thought had really crossed his mind. He nodded back at her, to acknowledge the intense exchange of emotion in between their eyes,and he spotted Asad turn up the volume on the radio, to distract himself with music,as he gazed out of the window.

....................

Fate sighed - " it really was too many goodbye's...poor Zoya..."

Hate rolled his eyes - "what did you expect?? i always keep reminding you about my existence, although this time around, my friend is acting on my behalf...",he finished gesturing towards Misery.

Misery nodded,deep in thought.

Destiny looked at Misery as she said - " do you have your seatbelt on?? looks like you will be very busy for a while..."

Hate snorted - "a while?? huh?? how does forever sound??",and he sat back in his chair.

Love looked at Hate and she asked directly - " are you really that heartless for real?? like seriously??I dont remember you being this vile..."

Hate,for the first time looked into Love's eyes, and he knew it was a mistake, for the compassion and the gentleness that he spotted in her eyes despite her anger, moved him, he was sure he felt something move inside of him,and he just shrugged, looking away - "what now??im just doing my job, thats all...arent we all?? do you ever realise how taxing it is for me to be like this..."

Love looked at him as she said softly - " then don't be...you can always mend your methods...whats wrong is being a little gentle with your blows??"

Hate looked at Love, and he was hating that movement inside of him,he had to make a point to never look in her deceiving eyes ever again,and he looked at Love as he said - "i do not wish to continue with this conversation...",and he walked away.

Love looked at Hate and Destiny said - " give up on him Love, its time you did...no point..."

Misery offered Love a glass of water as he said - " here gulp it down..."

Fate grinned as he looked at Misery - " hey, i like how you watch out for my friend..."

Misery smiled as she said - "why don't you tell me about the other things that you like about me?? I mean, I'm sure there are some more..."

Fate grinned - "ofcourse...come here lady, i have a full list ready..."

Misery laughed,as she sat next to Fate,and started to listen to him.

Destiny looked at Love as she asked - " you ok??"

Love nodded,as she said - " ofcourse..",and she watched Destiny return to her desk.

Love picked up the book in her hand,and she resumed reading, but right then she saw Hate look up from his desk,and their eyes locked,and he immediately looked away,and she returned her attention to her book in hand, she wished she could tell anyone about this one blatant truth,maybe one day she could,maybe one day she could really tell the world, that she couldn't really give up ever on Hate, because he was a part of her heart no matter how different he was.It didn't matter how they always stood miles apart from each other, because she still had a special place for him in her heart.

Strange though, being Love herself,she couldn't ever have her happily ever after, because her treacherous heart had given itself away to that wicked emotion sitting right in front of her.Thats why he was always such a strong part of her, something which was so intense, something which couldn't be ignored,because ironically she could never really past with him for she had always been in Love with Hate.

And maybe thats how it was meant to be.

Maybe, Hate was never meant to know, how deeply Love, loved him.

................................